PWL30 - Tuesday, June 10th, 2008

Official results from

PWL30
The Thirtieth Anniversary Show

Held Tuesday night, June 10th, 2008, at Browns Grounds, St. Louis, Missouri.

Opening bout: TEETHWOOD SLACK (DR. TEETH and SGT. FLOYD) defeated LUNCH MEAT MUMFORD and PORK CHOP HASH at 8’14”. Teeth pinned Hash in the aftermath of interference (unseen by the referee) from a bearded fellow called Janitor Jon, purported to be a “cousin” of Floyd. Referee: Stag Burley.

Second match: KENDO NAGASAKI pinned THE GRAND KABUKI in 7’57”. Nagasaki was seconded by his adviser, Roderick “The Scunner” Campbell . Referee: Burt Boscoe.

Third match, Ladies’ World’s tag team championship final: TRULY TAG TEAM (REALLY ROSIE and ACTUALLY ALICE) captured the long dormant ladies’ titles in a victory over THE NEW QUEEN BEES (NAOMI and THELMA) in 8’50”. Rosie pinned a perplexed Naomi for the win. The New Queen Bees were seconded by Bee Keeper Vint, who stood by with a bucket in his hand. Referee: Bertha Swift.

Fourth match, Loser Leaves Town: BILLY JO JIVE (accompanied by “Sweet” Susie Sunset) easily defeated THE REV. W.W. DAVIS, gaining a submission victory at 6’01”. Davis must leave the PWL as a result of his loss. Referee: Reggie Felks.

Fifth match, No Holds Barred: In a bloody contest popular with the rowdier fans, THE GRITHER pinned MAX GRODY in 13’41”. Both wrestlers displayed little, if any, scientific wrestling ability, but were rewarded by the crowd’s adulation nonetheless. Referee: Stag Burley.

Sixth match: EXTERMINANS pinned “Mr. November” SAM HAIN in 14’33”. Exterminans was seconded by manager Mondo Mbamba; conspicuous by his absence was The Rev. W.W. Davis, Hain’s manager. Referee: Dick Lucas.

Seventh match, World’s junior heavyweight championship: FENWICK GRENCHER defeated VIRGIN BARRY via pinfall at 18’10”. Barry surprised many with his pure wrestling skill, but Grencher proved why he has been champion for over five years running. Referee: Burt Boscoe.

Eighth match: SCHOOLHOUSE ROCKY and ALOYSIUS MARTIN grappled their way to a 20-minute draw. This was clearly the most scientific match of the evening, and Rocky and Martin shook hands at the bout’s conclusion. The St. Louis fans displayed their keen knowledge of and respect for the sport’s different styles by cheering and applauding this match as much as the no-holds-barred match earlier. Referee: Reggie Felks.

Ninth match, Ladies’ World’s championship: The second-longest reign of any recognized ladies’ championship came to an end here as PENNY DREADFUL fulfilled her dream of winning her first Ladies’ World’s championship. She pinned defending champion DARK CRYSTAL in 10’30” to earn the win. Referee: Bertha Swift.

Tenth match, North American heavyweight championship: In somewhat of an upset, ASHTON BUTCHER defeated HUMAN TORNADO via pinfall at 13’01” to win the North American title. Butcher was accompanied by his “friend” and valet, Bambi. Referee: Dick Lucas.

Eleventh match, World’s tag team championship: After many personae, BUTCH and BAMM-BAMM have now found a winning formula, and they have now literally struck gold. Declaring themselves “cousins” and taking the long-dormant identities of THE SHEEPHERDERS, Butch and Bamm-Bamm ended the fifth title reign of GOLEM and QUARTZ, THE PILLARS OF PAIN. With the timely help of flag bearer interference, “Cousin” Bamm-Bamm pinned Golem at 15’08” to capture the belts for “Cousin” Butch and himself. Accompanying The Sheepherders was their official flag bearer, Kronie. Referee: Burt Boscoe.

Twelfth match, Missouri State heavyweight championship: The revolving door of title changes continued here as EARL “Strangler” LEWIS defeated BEN TRAYMOR in 21’51” to take the Show-Me State crown. Lewis wore Traymor down with his Asian nerve hold, leading into a butterfly suplex, and he concluded with a scoop body slam-small package combination for the win. Referee: Reggie Felks.

Main event, World’s heavyweight championship: In a bout touched with confusion, THE TERROR maintained his grip on wrestling’s greatest prize, retaining the World’s title with a pinfall victory over CHARLEY HAWSE in 18’14”. Approximately one minute before the match’s conclusion, Hawse thought the championship was his after pinning The Terror. It was the referee’s unfortunate responsibility to inform the capable challenger Hawse that Terror had draped his leg over the lowest rope just before he would have counted “three.” Ever the wily veteran, Terror took advantage of Hawse’s temporary bewilderment with a brief series of maneuvers leading to the dreaded Terror Spike. All Hawse could do afterwards was shake his head in the realization that his split second of distraction led to his loss. Referee: Stag Burley.