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YO MOMMA

SO UGLY...................

- they didn't make a costume for her when she tried out for Star Wars. 

-when she walks into a bank, they turn off the surveillance cameras. 

- she scares blind children. 

- it looks like her neck threw up

- a freight train took a dirt road to avoid her. 

- she went into a haunted house and came out with a job Application

- when she tried to work a street corner Johns paid her to leave.

- she has to trick or treat over the phone

- she walks down the street and gets aressted for attempted murder.

- when she joined an ugly contest, they said "Sorry, no professionals" 

- she's like Taco Bell. When people see her, they run for the border

- when she walks by the bathroom the toilet flushes.
Return 

- when I took her to the zoo they said, "Thank you for bringing her back." 

- they put her in a tinted incubator when she was born. 
. 
- when she fell off the ugly tree she hit every branch on the way down. 

- she turned Madusa to stone. 

- when she's taking a shower, it's like "Gorillas in the Mist." 

- she looked out the window and got arrested for mooning. 
- just after her birth, her mother saw the after-birth and said "Twins" 

- just after her birth, the doctor slapped her mother. 

- just after she was born, her mother said "What a treasure!" and her father said "Yeah! Let's go bury it!" 

- they push her fact into dough to make gorilla cookies. 
- when she was born, the doctor slapped the wrong end. 


SO Poor...................

Yo momma so poor burglars break in her house and leave money. 

Your so poor I saw you mom kickin' a can down the street i said,"What are you doing?"
 she said "Moving!"

Yo momma so poor she can't afford to pay attention! 

Yo momma so poor when I ring the doorbell I hear the toilet flush! 

Yo momma so poor when she goes to KFC, she has to lick other people's fingers!!! 

Yo momma so poor when I ring the doorbell she says,"DING!"

Yo momma so poor your family ate cereal with a fork to save milk.

Yo momma so poor her face is on the front of a foodstamp. 

Yo momma so poor she was in K-Mart with a box of Hefty bags. I said, "What ya doin'?"
She said, "Buying luggage." 

Yo momma so poor she waves around a popsicle stick and calls it air conditioning. 

she put McDonalds milkshake on layaway.

that she is forced to live in a place where she has to 
 go outside to change your mind. 

Yo momma so poor you go out for sunday pushes of the skateboard. 

Yo momma so poor she married at 12 just so she could get the rice. 

Yo momma so poor I walked into her house and a cockroach tripped me
     and a rat stole my wallet! 
so poor when I went to her house and stepped on a cigarette
     butt, she yelled "Who turned off the heat!!" 
Yo momma so poor I went over to her house and sat on the couch and the
     cockroaches told me, "Scoot over! We pay half the rent!" 
Yo momma so poor she lives in a two story Dorito bag. 

Yo momma so poor when I walked into her house and lit a cigarette, she
     yelled "Stomp your feet, clap your hands, praise the lord we have heat!" 
Yo momma so poor when I walked into her house, opened the frige door,
     and on the top shelf were 5 cockroaches holding hands singing "We
     Are Family". 


Teeth so yellow...................

traffic slows down when she smiles!

she spits butter!

Yo momma teeth are so yellow I can't believe its not butter.

 Click here for Jokes page 4