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The Top Ten reasons To Hate JD Drew
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JD Drew
JD Drew Is One Fine Piece of Ass
J.D. at the Bat
Things didn’t look good for the Cardinals that day;
They trailed by two with just one inning to play.
And with two men out and no runners on,
It seemed as if all hope for a victory was gone.
But all of a sudden, a sign that the game was not through,
There, in the dugout, picking up a bat was J.D. Drew;
The fans thought, if only J.D. could get a whack at that,
J.D. could win it with one swing of the bat.
But Drew’s place in the order was still three spots away,
Two men would have to get on base before J.D. could have his way.
After a walk put one man on base, the fans began to cheer,
For J.D.’s spot in the lineup was near.
The next batter doubled down the line,
J.D. Drew was up now, everything would be fine;
With runners at second and third, a single would tie the game,
But the fans knew J.D. could win it with a homer; that’s why they came.
The fans were yelling and screaming, and nobody sat,
For the mighty J.D. Drew was advancing to the bat;
There was an ease in his manner as he stepped into his place;
He stood there confident and cocky, with a smile on his face.
This is why the Cardinals paid him the big bucks, for situations like these,
And the fans were confident he would come through with ease.
But J.D. wasn’t worried, he thought he was the greatest player on earth,
And now was his chance to prove his worth.
The pitcher wound and sent the ball toward the plate,
The fans were all silent as they awaited their fate;
But J.D. did not swing, he thought it was high,
"Strike one," said the umpire, "it crossed at your thigh."
The fans couldn’t believe it; they hissed and booed at the call,
But before they knew it, the pitcher had delivered another ball.
Again J.D. did not swing, and again the pitch was a strike,
The count was now 0 and 2, a fact the fans did not like.
The tension mounts as J.D. steps up to the plate,
He sets his feet and stares at the pitcher in hate.
The pitcher goes into his windup and delivers the ball,
And J.D. lets loose with the greatest swing of all.
Oh, in other stadiums, fans are cheering loud,
Their teams are winning and they’re certainly proud,
And the players celebrate and the fans shout;
But there is no joy in St. Louis -- mighty J.D. has struck out.
Top Ten Reasons JD Wouldn't Sign With The Phillies
- I mean Come On, Six Million is a little low for someone who's never swung a MLB Bat.
- He didn't know what a Phillie was.
- He's afraid of Curt Schilling.
- He's afraid of the Phanatic.
- He's afraid with Scott Rolen on the team he might not get the Spot Light.
- Francona wouldn't let him wear his Golden Spikes on the field.
- A player sent from god deserves a better team.
- He needed more money to pay his agent.
- He didn't want to play for the Phillies.
- He takes contract advice from his magic 8 ball.
Email: maggiem_17@hotmail.com
