Last night I stayed up late adding to my fetish collection.
I suppose I'll just stop right now and explain to you what my fetish collection is. You see, I am a newbie fan of the animated TV series "Reboot," and while ago I made a silver and blue marbled disc out of sculpey with a burgundy "B" carved into it. I called it my Bob fetish, so named after one of my favourite characters from the show. My chum Allyson further added to it by sticking a picture of Bob to it with clear nail polish, and I have since been making fetishes of any and everything I like. I have six as of last night/this morning: Bob, Hexadecimal (another Reboot character), Jemima from CATS, Noah (Hathaway, sexayist man alive), Jude (Law, also sexayist man alive--don't ask how that's possible, it just is) and Christian (Bale, ALSO sexayist man alive :) ).
Anywho. This morning in my Creative Writing class, I set all my fetishes on my desk so that I'd have good vibes for my vocab test. As was hoped for, I did well on the test! *GASP!* I thought to myself, could it be that my humble little fetishes have been endowed with magical powers? Or is it just that I studied? Anywho...
What follows is the little story/dialogue I made up for them as I was staring at them all aranged on my desk--whether this is further indication of their mysterious powers or simply the product of a sleep deprived mind, only time will tell.
RUTHIE: Not so FAST, Hexadecimal Fetish! Fortunately, I foresaw your evil scheming and created...*dramatic pause* The Bob Fetish! *dramatic chord progression*
BOB FETISH: That's right! I'm here to stop you from harming Mainframe any longer, Hex--
RUTHIE: *whispers something to Bob Fetish*
BOB FETISH: --er, I mean, to keep you from harming Ruthie's Desk any longer. Yeeees.
HEXADECIMAL FETISH: Oooh! Why, hellooo, Bob. *evil seductive smirk*
BOB FETISH: AHHH! NOOO! I am powerless against the Evil Seductive Smirk!
HEX FETISH: Of cooourse. *smirk smirk SMIRK*
JUDE FETISH: Don't worry, Bob, I'll save you! *Jude Fetish be's all sexay right in front of Hexadecimal Fetish*
HEXADECIMAL FETISH: GACK! *gurgles and retreats* Damn you and your evil schemes, Ruthie! *shakes fist* *retreats into fairly-docile-Hex mode*
RUTHIE: Phew...that was close. Thank you, Jude Fetish!
JUDE FETISH: *smoothly* No problem, sweets. *turns to Bob Fetish and looks at him for a while*
JEMIMA FETISH: *bats at Ruthie's shoe* mew! *big cute kitten eyes*
RUTHIE:Awwwe, hi there, Jemima. *pats her head* :)
JEMIMA FETISH:I watned to help, but...I think I'm too late. :(
NOAH FETISH: You're not too late to save me from my lack of fuzzy cuteness! *drops on floor and makes choking noises* Help! Save...me...!
JEMIMA FETISH: Oooh! *runs and pounces Noah Fetish*
NOAH FETISH: *grinning* Thanks, Jemima.
BOB FETISH:*whispers to Ruthie* Jude keeps LOOKING at me...
JUDE FETISH: What's the matter, honey? *pinches Bob's cheek*
BOB FETISH:NOOOO!!!!! *runs away and hides*
Is Jude pracitising some sort of creepy alternative lifestyle we don't know about yet?
Will he come to terms with these and other issues?
Will Christian Fetish EVER make an appearance?
Find out on the next episode of:
CLAYS OF OUR LIVES
