August 9 & 13
August 9th
I have no idea why I haven't written in here, this is why i can't keep a regular journal.
Hey, someone actually read my journal and signed my guestbook. That's cool.
Well, Sunday I got called to come in for an interview for that clothing store in the mall. Yuck. I went in Monday and got hired within like five minutes, (damn) So, last night I went to work. (and didn't get to see my boyfriend) It was awful. There were like fifty different flowered skirts. I had to put away racks and racks of clothing and I didn't have a clue where they belonged. I forgot how much those retail jobs hurt your feet and stuff. so, i saw my schedule for next week and it sucked. i worked all the times that chad is actually free, (which is what i'm trying to avoid) i was working saturday, (no thanks) and a couple other week nights. and i was really bad... i was supposed to go in today and didn't. i can't handle that stuff.
I couldn't sleep last night. I was just worried about this job and chad. so by 7:30 I was like, "i don't think so," and went back to sleep. they were paying me a buck less than i'm used to anyway so it wasn't some great job.
Chad lied to me last night. I'm really upset about it. I don't understand why he lies to me (to avoid hurting my feelings) when he loves me. I don't lie to him. it's like, well maybe i should just start lieing about everything!
keeping with my "i'm freaking about the guard deal," maybe i should just distance myself from him before he goes?? i'm really attached. I want to be with him everyday and sleep with him (as in ZZZZ) any chance i get. i don't like him hanging out with his friends instead of me. maybe i like him too much. maybe it wouldn't have ever been as bad if we hadn't gotten this close. i'm just really unable to "let go" of this subject. I can't believe he signed up. i feel like he is doing something bad to me by going, because he will be leaving me here. i don't think that it was right, he could of gotten loans.
anyway, as far as my html goes, i'm working on it. i don't like my format so far but i need to look around at other journals. i noticed some use the templates, but i'm doing my own from sratch.
i got my hair chopped off short and styled really cute today. chad doesn't know yet. i had it highlighted and layered. speaking of, why hasn't he paged me yet?? he works with his dad all day till about six. (handyman stuff)
August 13
Um, I'm getting bad at keeping up in here. I never get the chance to get online with one phone line and it's rude to do when my boyfriend comes over.
I started my scrapbook/journal for Chad last night. I really need to write him a poem. I write sometimes, when I'm 'inspired' and of all people, I should write to him.
Hey, someone actually read this and wrote in their own journal about my situation with Chad leaving. I agree with him (you). It's not a really long time. I just will miss him SOOOOO much.
Did I mention that I went to the job one day and quit? But I have an interview now at the place I applied at awhile back in here that I actually WANT to work at. (monday thru friday, 3-6)
School starts Monday. Whoa. I still need to buy a few books and stuff. I just know that two of my classes will be really hard for me; science and college algebra. I'm an english person, writing is my thing. I hate the other stuff....
I read a lot too, when I have time in my life and when I do and get totally wrapped up in the book; I spend every extra second reading and stay up till my eyes are half closed. My last book called "Julia" scared me when I stayed up late reading it. The old, someone's under my bed or in the closet stuff. But that's what I like to read, ghost stories.
Anyone have any ghost stories? Like stuff that really happened? I've never seen one, thank GOD. I got a Ouiga board way back in high school or something. We just moved into an old house that's a hundred years old so I WON'T be using it here... to much history here.
I'm just rambling about whatever now, I'm just really tired. Maybe I should of done my journal from newest to oldest instead. Sorry. I'm new to this.