Doyle is standing in front of a large post, which has honey running down it. The survivors stand behind him, in their teams, looking hungry and mistrustful. It’s dark, so the vampires aren’t dust.
Doyle: After the last challenge, we’ve decided to hold all events at night until the vampires have been voted off. I told them that from the start, but apparently they don’t listen to dead guys. Today’s challenge is really stupid. Behind me is a fifteen-foot pole. It’s covered in honey. Each contestant has to try and climb the pole. The team with the person with the fastest time reaching the top wins immunity. Ready, Survivors?
General unenthusiastic murmuring from the two teams, who look doubtfully at the pole.
Doyle: Right. Okay. Go.
The contestants begin. Climbing the pole is harder than it looks. Only Fred makes it to the top by fashioning a complicated pulley-system out of her tribal bandana and her bikini top. The men ogle her.
Testimonials before tribal council, at the Poofter Tribe.
Angel: Yeah, I’m voting for Riley. I really hate that guy.
Riley: I’m voting Angel off the island. I really hate that guy.
Anya: I’m going to vote for Gunn. We had a fight this morning, because he had a pet rabbit as a child. I think it’s a conspiracy.
Gunn: That Anya chick is whack. I’m voting her off.
Lindsey: I think I’m going to vote for Angel. Just cuz he’s Angel, and I don’t like him.
Giles: I believe I’m going to be casting my vote against Lindsey. According to Angel, he’s an evil lawyer. In the past, Angel and I have had our differences, but if he says someone is on the side of darkness, I’m inclined to believe him.
Willow: I guess I’m going to vote for Lindsey. I mean, Angel said he’s evil. Plus, he’s got that whole evil hand.
Meanwhile, back at the Nancy Boy Tribe
Three alliances have been formed. Buffy, Xander, Tara, and Dawn are part of one. The other is Wes, Cordy, Fred, and Lorne. Spike is not part of either alliance, since most of the tribe really doesn’t like him. But Dawn has made her group promise not to vote for him, because if he votes with them, they have a better chance of winning.
Buffy and Spike are shown arguing. Xander throws little rocks in Cordy’s direction, and she glares at him. Fred and Tara are talking, while Wes, Lorne, and Dawn cook breakfast.
Wes: the dynamic of our tribe is split in half. I suspect it mostly has something to do with the rift between the people from Sunnydale and those of us from Los Angeles. I’m afraid that our days are numbered.
Poofter Tribal Council
Doyle: So tell me, Riley, how’s your stay on the island so far?
Riley: I have a tick on my ass.
Doyle: Not so good then, eh?
Lindsey: What, are you Canadian now?
Doyle: I’m Irish. Ya frickin Oklahoma yokel. What about you, Angel? How’s your stay on the island going?
Angel: One word. Riley. I really hate that guy. I hope the tick burrows deep into his-
Doyle: Right! Okay, then. Moving on, let’s tally the votes. (Doyle counts the votes) All right, Evil Hand man. You’re out. Your tribe voted you off the island. Well, two of them did, anyway. Have a good trip back to Oklahoma. Bye, Lindsey!
(Lindsey leaves)
The tribe starts to walk back to their camp.
Angel: So, Soldierboy. How’s that tick on your ass?
Riley: Shut up.
Giles: Good Lord, will you two bloody well shut up?!
