THE MONKEYS DISGRACE

Three monkeys sat in a coconut tree,

Discussing things as they’re said to be

Said one to another, not listen, you two,

There’s a certain rumor that couldn’t be true.

That man descended from our noble race,

The very idea is a disgrace.

No monkey has ever deserted his wife,

Starved her babies and ruined her life.

And have you ever known a mother monk

To leave her babies with others to bunk

Or pass them on from one to another

‘til they scarcely know who is their mother.

And another thing you’ll never see,

A monk build a fence around a coconut tree

And let the coconuts go to waste

Forbidding all other monks to taste.

Why, if I put a fence around a tree

Starvation would force you to steal from me.

Here’s another thing a monk won’t do,

Go out at night and get on a stew

Or use a gun or club or knife

To take some other monkey’s life

Yes, man descended, the ornery cuss,

But brother, he didn’t descend from us!”