* 1/2 Large Lizard Attacks an HO Scale Town.

I can sum this one up in one sentence: They took an innocent gila monster, put it on a model train set, filmed it, and called it a movie. A lot of giant monster movies were very low budget, but this just might have been the cheapest giant monster movie made!

A small town somewhere in Texas starts having mysterious disappearances out in the desert. After 3/4 of the movie, they finally figure out it is an extra-large gila monster who is extra hungry (most lizards don't need to eat much, but this one apparently does). It attacks a barn, gets shot at, and is blown up by a driverless car filled with nitro.

One word describes the review: LAME! It has a lame, boring plot. The special effects are equally lame, nearly absent. The production is lame, the film quality is lame, the music is lame, and the whole movie is lame, lame, and lame! The plot is based on the 50's aspect of hot-roding teenagers. Nice if you want to see a view of the 50's from the 50's, but the lame plot flow and bad acting really ruin it. Not only that, but this one guy keeps playing extremely lame and mind-numbing songs with his ukulele! It whips the thing out a couple of times, and gives the most annoying performance that you ever seen! I rather listen to the mothra aliases sing than to here this goof "sing"! It makes you wish the gila monster would eat the guy! But that's not going to happen, the lame special effects won't allow it. Something can be said for animal cruelty in this movie. Sure, it was bad enough with the tarantula, but this is an advanced species of reptile. Reptiles are smart creatures, and deserve our respects. But they didn't respect the great lizard. They mad him knock over toy trains and they shoved his nose through a balsa wood barn! Poor little guy.

Still, they movie isn't all that bad. Unlike a lot of other giant monster movies, this one at least tries to make it scary. It is more of a horror movie than a Sc-fi movie. It failed at it, however, because of the lameness of the model buildings. Still, it tried, and it even added some very creepy music (not the ukulele song, that's not scary, that's horrible!) The movie's lame, but it's so lame it's funny. It has a zillion pathetic things to laugh at, including a scene where you can see a crewmember's hand in the windshield of a car (it's right before the guy in the car sees the train wreck). However, the plot is so mind-numbingly boring, dull, and lame, that it's just not worth it. Even hard-core camp fans might find it unbearable. Sill, it is quite silly. If you start watching it with a non-serious attitude and a warning of its lameness, it isn't all that bad. Fast-foreword through the singing, and you should be fine.

So lame it's funny plot

So lame it's funny special effects

Realistic view of the 50's

At least tried to be scary

Made a gila monster an actual monster

Lame!

Pathetic model buildings

When are these people going to ever figure out that it's a gila monster?

Oh no, stop singing! Put the ukulele down and step away!

No, not again! I said stop! Hey, Mr. Gila Monster, eat him! Eat him now!! Please!!!

Credits