ANNIE
That's funny because there's something really important I want to talk to
you about.
NICK
Okay, you go first.
ANNIE
No, you.
NICK
Okay, I want to talk to you about Meredith.
ANNIE
And I want to talk to you about my mother.
(then)
What about Meredith?
NICK
(thrown)
W-W-What about your mother?
ANNIE
Dad, I'm almost twelve, how long do you expect me to buy that story that
The Stork dropped me on your doorstep?
NICK
C'mon, Hal, we've talked about your mother...
ANNIE
No we haven't. Not really. A girl needs more in life than half of a crumpled
old photograph. Dad, I'm almost a teenager, face it, I need a mother.
NICK
You know what? You're right. You do. Which brings me to--
[They turn a corner and-bump into MEREDITH who is walking with her British assistant, RICHARD]
NICK
Meredith!
MEREDITH
Hi.
(noticing Annie)
Hello, Hal.
ANNIE
Hi there.
MEREDITH
Hallie, this is my assistant, Richard. Richard, this is Nick's daughter,
the one
I've been telling you so much about.
RICHARD
(stuffy British accent)
Oh, hello. How are you, luv?
ANNIE
(with her best British accent)
Oh, don't tell me you're British? How lovely.
NICK
(surprised, to Annie)
How'd you do that?
RICHARD
You do an absolutely marvelous British accent.
ANNIE
Yours isn't bad either, old chap
[Richard laughs.]
MEREDITH
(whispers to Nick)
Did you tell her?
NICK
Almost.
MEREDITH
Hey, if you're free later, why don't we all have lunch on the terrace?
NICK
Actually, I promised Hal we'd hang out together this afternoon.
[Annie smiles.]
MEREDITH
No problem.
(starts off)
I’ve got plenty to do... I'm working on a new label design , Nicky...
featuring Y-O-U. You're gonna love it.
(throws a kiss)
See you for dinner, darling. Bye, Hals.
[TRACKING ANGLE - MEREDITH AND RICHARD
As they walk away.]
MEREDITH
(sotto, to Richard)
First change I make in that household is to send that two-faced little brat
off to boarding school in Timbuktu.
RICHARD
(an exaggerated shiver)
Oooooooo. Ice woman.
MEREDITH
And proud of it, babe.
[EXT. HILLTOP – OVERLOOKING NAPA VALLEY – A LITTLE LATER
A beat and Nick and Annie gallop on horseback OVER THE CREST of the mountain.
As they slow their horses to a walk.]
NICK
So, you excited about our camping trip?
ANNIE:
What camping trip?
NICK
What camping trip? The one we go on every summer before you go back to school.
ANNIE
Oh, that camping trip. Yeah, sure... I can't wait.
NICK
So, Hal, what do you think of Meredith?
ANNIE
As what, Dad? Your publicist? Your friend? Your ... ?
NICK
-- Just what do you think of her... as a person?
ANNIE
well, she's cute, she has nice hair, good teeth, she can spell the word YOU...
I
[KING NAPA VALLEY - A LITTLE LATER]
ANNIE
don't know. Honestly, Dad, the woman's a complete stranger to me. Why do
you want my opinion anyway?
NICK
(takes a beat)
Well, I'll tell you why... because believe it or not, honey...
ANNIE
(cutting him off)
-- Race you back to the ranch, Dad!
[Annie jams her heels into Sprout's flanks and the horse takes off like a bat out of hell.]
NICK
Hallie, I'm trying to tell you something!
[EXT. HOUSE - MOMENTS LATER
Out of breath, Annie runs up the porch steps and throws open the screen
door.
INT. LIVING ROOM
Annie stops, catches her breath. She's a little panicky.]
ANNIE
(to herself)
I'm in so over my head here. I can't handle this alone. I just can't. I'm
only one kid.
[Chessy PEEKS HER HEAD AROUND THE CORNER of the arm chair she's been sitting in.]
CHESSY
You got something you'd like to share with the class?
ANNIE
(jumps, :frightened)
Oh, Chessy, you gave me a fright!
CHESSY
I gave you a fright?
ANNIE
You scared me. I didn't know you were like, in here.
CHESSY
(rising)
[You sure there's nothing you want to talk to me about? Like maybe why Sammy never comes near you anymore or why your appetite's suddenly changed or why all of a sudden you're neat as a pin and using expressions like, 'You gave me a fright']
ANNIE
Chessy, I changed a lot over the summer, that's all.
CHESSY
If I didn't know better, I'd say it's almost as if you were...
(shakes it off)
Oh, never mind, that's too impossible.
(turns to leave)
ANNIE
-- Almost as if I were who, Chessy?
CHESSY
Nobody. Nobody. Forget I even mentioned it.
ANNIE
Almost as if I were... Annie?
[Chessy stops, stunned, goose-bumps popping up all over.]
CHESSY
You know about Annie?
ANNIE
I AM Annie.
[Just then, Nick ENTERS, also a little out of breath.]
NICK
-- Why'd you take off like that? I told you I wanted-to talk to you about
something? Chessy, why are you looking at her like that?
CHESSY
(with a start)
Like what? I'm not looking at her any special way.
(eyes tearing up)
I'm looking at her just like I've looked at her for eleven years. Since the
day she came home from the hospital, six pounds, eleven ounces, twenty-one
inches long.
(crying now)
This is how I look at her. Can I hug her?
[Chessy, all broken up, hugs Annie like she's hugging her for the first time.]
CHESSY
She's so beautiful and so big.
[Annie gives Chessy a look that says, 'Please don't say anything!]
CHESSY
I'm gonna go make you something special to eat. What would you like? Oh,
it doesn't matter. I'll whip up everything we've got.
[Chessy takes off as Nick approaches Annie.]
NICK
[Why's everybody acting so nutty around here? Hal, we gotta talk.]
ANNIE
Okay. Shoot.
NICK
Honey, look... I want to know what you think about making Meredith part of
the family?
ANNIE
Part of our family?
NICK
Yes.
ANNIE
I think it's an awesome idea. Inspired. Brilliant really.
NICK
You do?
ANNIE
Totally. it's like a dream come true. I've always wanted a big sister.
NICK
Honey, I'm afraid you're kind of missing the point.
ANNIE
No, I'm not. You're going to adopt Meredith. That is so sweet, Dad..
NICK
I'm not going to adopt her, I'm going to MARRY her.
ANNIE
(leaping up)
Marry her?!? That's insane! How can you marry a woman young enough to be
my big sister?!?
[She starts ranting and raving, then slips into French.]
NICK
Hal, calm down.
(realizing)
Now you speak French?!?
ANNIE
I learned it at camp.
(takes a breath)
Okay, I'm sorry. Let's discuss this calmly and rationally...
NICK
And in English, if you don't mind. Man, what has gotten into you?
ANNIE
Nothing. it's nothing... Just... Just...
(lets it all out)
Dad, you can't get married! It'll totally ruin completely everything!!!
[Annie storms out. Nick notices Chessy standing in the doorway, biting her nails.]
CHESSY
Don't look at me, I know nothing.
[A HORN HONKS O.S. Nick looks out the window and SEES Meredith getting out of her red Mercedes convertible. Nick sinks into a chair, as, he hears Hallie's DOOR SLAM upstairs.]
NICK
Maybe I am too old for this.
[Meredith sweeps into the room, wearing sunglasses.]
MEREDITH
(to Nick)
Hi, doll.
[She sits on Nick's lap, wraps her arms around him. Kisses him. Kisses him again.]
MEREDITH
(running her fingers through his hair)
You look stressed, baby. How about a Martini?
NICK
How about a double?
[Meredith snaps open her purse and takes out a Tiffany box. She removes a small SILVER BELL which she holds up and RINGS.]
MEREDITH
Chessy?
[She RINGS it again. Nick gives her a curious look.]
MEREDITH
Don't you love it? it's just what we need. It's such a big house.
[-She RINGS again. Chessy appears, not too wild about the bell.]
CHESSY
You rang?
MEREDITH
Two martinis, please. And make Mr. Parker's a double.
[Chessy just stands there.]
NICK
Please, Chess. I'm getting a migraine...
[Chessy holds her shirt-tails out as if they were a skirt and curtsies.]
(watching her leave)
I don't know if a uniform will make her look better or worse.
NICK
(rubbing his temples)
I told Hallie.
MEREDITH
You did? And?
NICK
She went ballistic. Started yelling in French, which I didn't even know she
spoke,
I just don't get her lately...
MEREDITH
Nicky, this reaction is totally classic. It's 'Daddy's Getting Remarried
- 101'. I'd worry if she didn't react this way. Look, why don't I talk
to her... woman to woman.
NICK
She's a little sensitive about you right now.
MEREDITH
(kisses him)
That's why I need to do it. We've got to break the ice sometime.
(unbuttons Nick's shirt button)
Wear your shirt like this... I like when
I can see a little chest hair.
[INT. HALLIE'S ROOM - MOMENTS LATER
Hallie sits on her deck, feet propped-up on the bannister, shuffling a deck
of cards. Meredith appears behind her, knocking on the open door.]
MEREDITH
Knock-knock.
(Annie turns)
Can I join you?
ANNIE
(shrugs)
Sure.
MEREDITH
Guess the news of the engagement came as a bit of a shock, huh?
ANNIE
Basically.
MEREDITH
You know, I remember what it was like to be eleven. I had my first beau at
eleven. It's a wonderful age. You're starting to feel like a woman and believe
it or not soon You'll understand what it's like to be in love.
ANNIE
Me? I don't think so. I don't even have my twelve year-old molars yet.
MEREDITH
Well, take it from someone who got their molars very early in life... being
in love is a fantastic
mystery that takes a man and woman on a magical journey to a place...
ANNIE
-- I don't mean to be jerky when you're trying to be all mushy and everything
but I think I know what mystery my Dad sees in you.
MEREDITH
You do?
ANNIE
You're young and beautiful and sexy and hey, the guy's only human. But if
you ask me, marriage is supposed to be based on something more than just
sex, right?
MEREDITH
Boy, your father underestimates you.
ANNIE
But you won't, will you, Meredith? They study each other carefully.
MEREDITH
So what if I'm young and beautiful? That's not a crime, you know. And for
your information, I adore your father. He's exactly-the kind of man
I always planned on marrying. This is the real deal, honey and nothing you
do is going to come between as. The reality is, angel, you are no longer
the only girl in Nick Parker's life. Get over it.
ANNIE
.If this is the real deal, then my Dad's money has nothing do with you wanting
to marry him, right?
MEREDITH
I hope you're not suggesting I'm marrying your father for his money.
ANNIE
All I know is, I've seen Cinderella a few zillion times and I'd rather not
end up scrubbing the floors and befriending all the birds in the neighborhood
while you're having breakfast in bed... if you get my drift?
MEREDITH
You are unbelievably out of line, young lady.
(rising)
Now you listen and listen good. I'm marrying your father in two weeks whether
you like it or not. So I suggest you do not tangle with me anymore. You're
in way over your head. is that clear?
ANNIE
Crystal.
[CLOSE ANGLE - A RINGING FAX MACHINE
as a FAX slithers out. A HAND reaches for the FAX. ANGLE BACK -to see Martin,
standing in ELIZABETH'S KITCHEN in LONDON. He looks at the FAX quizzically,
then carries it into:
THE DINING ROOM where Hallie is eating dinner with her Mother and Grandfather.
Martin refills the adults' wine glasses, holding the FAX behind his back
as he pours.]
ELIZABETH
This is fantastic wine by the way Martin.
HALLIE
May I have a-sip?
ELIZABETH
(offering her a sip)
I don't think you're going like it.
[Hallie swirls the wine confidently, passes it under her nose, then takes a healthy sip.]
HALLIE
If you ask me, the bouquet is a little too robust for a Merlot. But then
again, I'm partial to the softer California grape.
[Elizabeth and Grandfather laugh, as Martin moves next to Hallie, holding the FAX behind his back. Hallie cocks her head to read it.]
[CLOSE - THE FAX
It's a drawing of SAMMY, Hallie's dog, laying on the front porch of Hallie's
house. A CARTOON BUBBLE coming out of his mouth says "911!" Hallie
bends over so far to read the FAX she FALLS OFF HER CHAIR and RIGHT OUT OF
FRAME.]
ELIZABETH
Honey, are you okay?
HALLIE
Had one sip too many, I guess.
(getting up)
You know, Mother, I feel like I could use a bit of fresh air. Would it be
okay if I stepped outside for a moment?
ELIZABETH
Of course. Are you okay? Would you like me to come with you?
HALLIE
No, no. I'll be fine... Just got a touch woozy, that's all.
[Hallie wipes her mouth with her napkin and excuses herself. Her Grandfather
watches her closely as she EXITS.
EXT. SHEPHERD'S MARKET - LONDON - EARLY MORNING
Hallie hurries down the picturesque street, turns a corner, spots a phone
and rushes to it. She pulls the door closed and dials the Operator.]
HALLIE
Yes, I'd like to make a collect-call to California, please. Area code 707
...
[INT. HALLIE'S ROOM NAPA - SAME TIME
Annie paces, biting her nails for real now. The PHONE RINGS. She pounces
on it in mid-ring.]
ANNIE
Hello? Yes, I'll accept the charges. Hallie, thank
goodness you got my fax. I'm absolutely desperate.
HALLIE (O.S.)
What's up? Why the 911?
[INTERCUT ANNIE AND HALLIE]
ANNIE
Dad's getting married.
HALLIE
(laughs)
Whaddya mean, getting married?
ANNIE
I mean black tie, white gown, the whole enchilada. The wedding's in two weeks
so, if there's any hope of getting Mom and Dad back together, we've got to
do it fast.
[Outside the Phone Booth, a MAN reads the evening paper, waiting to use the-phone.]
HALLIE
Okay, Mom and I are going to the theatre tonight so I'll drop the bomb on
her first thing in the morning.
ANNIE
Give Mom a kiss for me, willya. And Grandfather, too. And Hallie, hurry.
[EXT. PHONE BOOTH
Hallie hangs up and steps out of the booth, BUMPING into the Man who's been
waiting.]
HALLIE
Oh, excuse me.
[The MAN turns around. It's Hallie's GRANDFATHER.]
HALLIE
Uh-oh...
GRANDFATHER
What do you say you and I take a little stroll in the park, young lady.
[Hallie bites her locket as her Grandfather leads her into the park.]
[EXT. JAMES TOWN HOUSE - ESTABLISHING - MORNING
INT. ELIZABETH'S BEDROOM - SAME TIME
Elizabeth sits up in bed, in white satin pajamas, finishing a cup of coffee
and a phone call to Paris. She sketches a wedding gown on a pad as she talks.]
ELIZABETH
(in French)
Au, Mademoiselle. I will have the sketch to you by tomorrow. I look forward
to hearing from you. Thank you. Au revoir.
[Hallie appears in the doorway, listening to her mother talk on the phone. Grandfather walks by and gives Hallie a little nudge, pushing her into the room.]
ELIZABETH
Hi, sweetie. Come on in.
[Elizabeth pats the bed. Hallie crosses and climbs in next to her mother.]
ELIZABETH
(with her arm around Hallie)
I have to finish this sketch and Fed Ex it to Paris, then how about you and
I go out to lunch and spend the rest of the day getting lost in Harrods?
ELIZABETH
Annie?
HALLIE'S VOICE
(from under the covers)
That's where I have to go. I have to go see Annie.
ELIZABETH
(playing along)
I see. And where would Annie be?
[Hallie's SHAPE SQUIRMS further UNDER the covers. HALLIE'S VOICE in
Napa with her father, Nick Parker.
CLOSE - ELIZABETH
As it hits her. Her eyes widen. She looks up to see HER FATHER leaning in
the door frame, puffing on his pipe. He nods. Elizabeth's eyes instantly
fill with tears. She lifts the covers to see Hallie, hiding, scared to death.]
ELIZABETH
You're not Annie?
HALLIE
That would be correct.
ELIZABETH
You're Hallie...
HALLIE
I am.
(crawls out from under covers, then with her American accent)
[Annie and I met at camp and we decided to switch places. I'm sorry, but I'd never seen you and I'd dreamt of meeting you my whole life and Annie felt the exact same way about Dad, so we just sorta switched lives. I hope you-re not mad because I love you so much and I just hope one day you can love me as me and not as Annie.]
ELIZABETH
Oh, honey, I've loved you your whole life.
[She takes Hallie in her arms.]
ELIZABETH
Why didn't you tell me it was you all along?
HALLIE
(through teary eyes)
I was scared.
[ANGLE - DOORWAY
where Martin stands, BAWLING hysterically. Grandfather gently steps in and
shuts Elizabeth's door. Martin falls into Grandfather's arms, heaving.]
MARTIN
I've never been so happy in my entire life.
[Grandfather pats him gently.
INT. ELIZABETH'S ROOM SAME TIME
Hallie and Elizabeth break from their hug. Elizabeth wipes her tears.]
HALLIE
I guess you have to switch us back now, huh?
ELIZABETH
Legally, you belong to your father and Annie belongs to me.
HALLIE
'His' and 'Hers', kids. No offense, Mom, but this arrangement really sucks.
ELIZABETH
I agree, it totally sucks. I don't want to lose you now that we've been together.
HALLIE
Well, then I guess we'll just have to fly to Napa,
see Annie and Dad and work this whole thing out.
ELIZABETH
I guess we will.
HALLIE
Will you be nervous about seeing Dad again?
ELIZABETH
No, of course not.
(as if it's preposterous)
[I can handle seeing Nick Parker after all these years. People see their
ex's all the time, don't they? Not to worry, sweetheart. I'll take care of
everything. Not-to-worry.
INT. ELIZABETH'S BEDROOM - THE FOLLOWING DAY
Elizabeth is a mess. She wears a silk blouse over a slip and a few Velcro
rollers just on top of her head. She chain smokes as she paces. Open luggage
is laid out on the bed behind her. Martin ENTERS carrying freshly pressed
clothes.]
ELIZABETH
I'm sorry, I can't handle this'. I haven't seen or heard from Nick Parker
in over eleven years and suddenly I'm flying halfway across the world to...
I'm not mature enough for this. if the man didn't make me so nuts, I'd still
be married to him.
(pulling out rollers)
We came up with this-arrangement so we'd never have to see each other
again.
(puts on sunglasses)
Look at me, Martin, have you ever seen me like this? Don't answer that.
(pacing)
What if he doesn't recognize me? Be honest, Martin, how old do I look? No,
don't answer that either. Hey, what am I worried about? He could be fat or
bald. Or both.
MARTIN
Actually, Hallie says her Dad's quite the hunk. And never re-married, either.
Just like you, ma'am.
ELIZABETH
Martin, it just so happens I'm not remarried by choice. I've had my opportunities
for ll'amour. Not lately, of course. But I've had my share of gentlemen callers.
MARTIN
Not lately.
ELIZABETH
I just said that! Hallie said he was a hunk, huh? He was rather dashing.
He used to make me weak in the knees, if you can imagine that.
(looks in the mirror)
Is that a grey hair?!
[She yanks the hair out as Hallie ENTERS carrying an overnight bag.]
HALLIE
All set, Mom.
ELIZABETH
(suddenly composed)
Good. Me too. Almost. Not quite.
HALLIE
Mom, your suitcase is totally empty.
ELIZABETH
Oh. Right. Sorry. Did you speak to your father, dear?
[Martin looks at Hallie. She LOCKS EYES with him for an instant, then turns to her Mom.]
HALLIE
Uh, yeah, I just hung up with him, actually. He said he's really anxious
to see you.
ELIZABETH
He did? Anxious-nervous, like he's dreading it or anxious-excited like he's
looking forward to it?
HALLIE
Anxious-excited, definitely.
[Again, Martin SQUINTS at Hallie, just knowing she's lying. But Hallie rolls on...]
HALLIE
He said he'll meet us tomorrow at noon at the Four Seasons in San Francisco.
ELIZABETH
Tomorrow? My, my that's incredibly soon, isn't it? Well, honey, why don't
you run downstairs and gather our tickets from your Grandfather while I finish
up here?
[Hallie starts out, Martin follows.]
MARTIN
(sotto, to Hallie)
Liar, Liar, pants on fire...
ELIZABETH
Oh, Martin, could you come back for a moment, please?
[Hallie raises her finger to her lips to 'Ssshhh" Martin, as he RE-ENTERS Elizabeth's room.]
ELIZABETH
Martin, I have a really ridiculous, somewhat childish request to make. Martin,
you know you're more than a Butler to me. You're like a lovable brother who
just happens to wait on us and...
(Martin nods modestly)
Anyway, I was wondering if...
MARTIN
-- I'd accompany you to make the trip a bit easier for you?
ELIZABETH
Would you, Martin? I'd be forever grateful. And you don't even have to go
as our butler. Just as a friend.
MARTIN
Madame, I'd be honored. And as a friend, may I say...
(reaches into her closet)
-- if I were seeing my ex after eleven years and I had your legs...
(pulls out a little RED DRESS)
I'd wear this baby. You'll kill in it.
[EXT. ELIZABETH'S TOM HOUSE - THAT AFTERNOON
A Limousine waits at the curb. Martin, in a black leather jacket and shades,
hands the luggage off to the Limo Driver. Elizabeth hugs her Father good-bye.
Then, it's Hallie's turn. She throws her arms around her Grandfather.]
HALLIE
Bye, Pop.
GRANDFATHER
Bye, Hal.
HALLIE
You're coming to Napa for Thanksgiving, right?
GRANDFATHER
I wouldn't miss it for the world.
[Hallie rises up on her tiptoes and kisses her Grandfather good-bye.]
GRANDFATHER
(as she runs off)
Say hello to your Father for me!
HALLIE
(waving as she gets in Limo)
I will!
[DISSOLVE TO: EXT. GOLDEN GATE BRIDGE - ESTABLISHING - DAY
EXT. THE FOUR SEASONS - SAN FRANCISCO - DAY
A CLOCK above the hotel's entrance clicks to twelve noon.
INT. HOTEL LOBBY - DAY
Meredith walks across the lobby with her PARENTS, a stunning couple in their
early fifties. We can see where she gets her looks and confidence.]
MEREDITH
(checks her watch)
Okay, they'll be here any minute... Be nice, Daddy. He's everything you ever
wanted for your little girl... plus millions more.
MR. BLAKE
Then you know I'll be nice.
MEREDITH
(laughs)
Okay, there he is...
(her face drops)
-- with the whole motley crew.
[ANGLE THE FRONT ENTRANCE
Nick, Annie, Chessy and Sammy ENTER the Lobby. Meredith rushes to greet them,
kissing Nick.]
MEREDITH
Hi, darling...
(then, nods to the others)
Hallie, Chessy... And Sammy, what in the world are you doing here?
(to Nick)
Honey, a dog in The Four Seasons?
NICK
Hal begged me to bring him.
MEREDITH
And naturally you said 'yes'.
[Sammy snaps at Meredith.]
CHESSY
(sotto, pats Sammy)
Good doggy.
(then)
Meredith, these the folks..?
MEREDITH
Yes! Mom... Dad... finally, you all meet.
(links arms with Nick)
This is my fiance and the love of my life, Nick Parker and this is his adorable
daughter Hallie who we can all thank for bringing us together this weekend...
This entire get together was her idea I'll have you know...
MR. BLAKE
Well, how are you young lady, I've heard nothing but wonderful things about
you.
[Nick beams.
EXT. FOUR SEASONS HOTEL - SAME. TIME
A TAXI pulls up and Martin and Hallie step out. Martin then reaches in the
backseat and helps Elizabeth out. She is wearing dark sunglasses and
is more than a little tipsy. She takes a small airplane-size vodka
bottle from her purse and polishes it off, tossing it over her shoulder.
Martin CATCHES IT before it crashes to the ground. As Hallie and Martin
guide Elizabeth up the steps to the hotel...]
ELIZABETH
That was a great flight, wasn't it? So quick.
MARTIN
I never saw you so... thirsty, before, ma'am.
ELIZABETH
-- You mean you never saw me drink so much vodka before! Guess what? I've
got news for you, Marty old chap... never tasted the stuff before. Not once.
MARTIN
Could've fooled me, ma'am.
ELIZABETH
(to Doorman)
Hello, Doorman. Oh, you scared me, I thought you were real for a minute..
HALLIE
(to herself)
I'm in such major trouble here.
[INT. HOTEL LOBBY
Martin and Hallie lead Elizabeth through the Lobby and deposit her at the
Front Desk. Miraculously, Nick and Meredith are nowhere in sight. Elizabeth
RINGS the BELL a zillion times. Hallie stops her by placing her hand over
the bell.]
HALLIE
Mom, you gonna be okay?
ELIZABETH
Absolutely. Never felt better in my life. But darling, tell me 'cause I'm
a bit confused... Have we landed yet?
[With that comment, Hallie lies her head down on the counter.
WHIPS ACROSS THE LOBBY
where Meredith, her folks, Nick, Chessy, Annie and Sammy EXIT a Dining Room.]
MEREDITH
-- I'm just saying, I know it's short notice, but if they can do it, I think
it would be a brilliant room for the wedding... Not too big, not too cramped...
Not that I don't like the idea of getting married at the house... I do but
this could be... amazing...
[CAMERA WHIPS BACK ACROSS THE LOBBY
as Hallie leads Elizabeth away from the FRONT DESK and toward a BANK OF
ELEVATORS. Elizabeth tries to hitch a ride on a passing luggage cart. Martin
peels her off.
ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE LOBBY
Sammy sniffs like a Hound Dog on the hunt, pulling Annie away from Nick,
Meredith and Meredith's Folks. Annie holds onto Sammy's leash while
at the same time, holding Chessy's hand. They are dragged across the lobby
as they others stay behind.]
MEREDITH
I've already checked us in, so why don't we go up to the rooms, freshen up,
then meet for lunch?
MR. BLAKE
Sounds good, I'm starved. Meet you back here in ten.
MEREDITH
(kisses her Dad on the cheek)
Perfect.
(then, leaning on Nick)
Sweetheart, want to check out the Honeymoon Suite while we're here? I bet
it's to die for.
[AT THE SAME TIME - ELIZABETH, HALLIE AND MARTIN step into an OPEN ELEVATOR. As the doors are about to close ...]
ELIZABETH
oh, jeez...
[She sticks out her band and the doors POP BACK OPEN.]
ELIZABETH
-- Forgot my purse.
[She RUSHES OUT of the elevator and CROSSES BACK toward the Front Desk just as... SAMMY SNIFFS HIS WAY toward HALLIE'S OPEN ELEVATOR. Sammy looks up, sees his favorite girl!]
HALLIE
(from the elevator)
Sammy!
[Hallie and Annie lock eyes as SAMMY BOLTS from Annie and leaps INTO THE
ELEVATOR, paws up on Hallie, licking her face.
AT THE FRONT DESK - ELIZABETH GRABS HER PURSE
and heads back to the elevator where she joins Annie, putting her arm around
her.]
ANNIE
Mom!
[Chessy's eyes widen, she does AN IMMEDIATE ABOUT-FACE so as not-to be seen.]
ELIZABETH
Honey, you didn't have to wait for me, I could've found the room by myself.
Besides ...
(whispers)
I've got to make a pit stop. Vodka makes you have to go like crazy... Go
on, thweetie, I'll meet
you upstairs ...
(Chessy sneaks a peek at her)
I mean, upthstair... uppth... upppthst...
I'll meet thyou up... thstairs!
(EXITS, then turns back)
I like that jacket by the way. Were you wearing that the whole time on the
plane?
[Elizabeth turns back and just misses colliding with a Bellhop carrying a huge BOUQUET OF FLOWERS. Annie slaps her forehead.]
ANNIE
(to Chessy)
She's drunk. She's never had more than one glass of wine in her entire life
and she chooses today
to show up zonked.
CHESSY
(leading her into an elevator)
Just do what the woman says and meet her upthstairs.
[Chessy and Annie get into a waiting elevator, it's DOORS CLOSE and they
are gone.
A BEAT LATER Nick and Meredith stroll up to the same elevators. Meredith
nibbles on Nick's ear as an elevator arrives. They step INSIDE THE ELEVATOR.]
MEREDITH
Alone at last.
[Meredith folds her arms around Nick's neck. At that very moment, Nick
spots:
ELIZABETH - STANDING DIRECTLY IN FRONT OF HIM
Nick blinks, unable to believe his eyes. Elizabeth smiles and gives him a
little wave.
Nick's EYES WIDEN as Meredith, her back to Elizabeth, continues kissing Nick.
As the ELEVATOR DOORS START TO CLOSE, Nick leans further and further to his
right, trying to keep his eyes on Elizabeth. He leans, he leans ... but the
DOORS CLOSE. He stands there stunned, eyes wide open.
INT. HOTEL CORRIDOR - MOMENTS LATER
Elizabeth barrels down the hallway, focused and furious.]
ELIZABETH
Hallie Parker!
[Simultaneously, TWO DOORS OPEN ACROSS THE HALL FROM EACH OTHER. Hallie stands in one doorway, Annie in the other.]
ELIZABETH
Don't do this to me, I'm already seeing double! Which one of you is Hallie?
(Hallie raises her hand)
Okay, now...
(then, softens at the sight of Annie)
Oh, honey ... hi...
ANNIE
Hi, Mom.
[Elizabeth crosses to Annie and hugs her.]
ELIZABETH
You look beautiful. So tan and healthy...
(kisses her, then, remembering)
Okay you two:.. How could you do this to me?
CHESSY
(arriving behind Annie)
.may I suggest we take this little pow-wow inside.
(to Elizabeth)
Hi, you probably don't remember me...
ELIZABETH
(warmly)
Chessy!
CHESSY
I knew I always liked you.
[INT. HOTEL SUITE - MOMENTS LATER The Girls sit side-by-side.]
ELIZABETH
Let me put this as sucthinkinctly as possible. You...
(points to Hallie)
I mean,
(points to Annie)
-- One of you told me your father knew I was arriving here today... And I'm
here to tell you the man I just saw in the elevator had absolutely no idea
he and I were on the same planet, let alone in the same hotel.
ANNIE
You saw Dad already?
ELIZABETH
Yeth. And it was completely and utterly humiliating. I gotta lie down...
(flops down on sofa, resting her head on a pillow)
The man went completely ashen. Like I was the bloody ghost of Christmas
past.
(rubs her head)
Can one of you get me something cold for my head?
(the Girls cross to the bar)
Don't you think I've pondered what it was going to be, like to see your father
again after all these years?
(the Girls exchange a look)
Well, let me tell you, me waving like a mindless idiot while Nick Parker
is wrapped in another woman's arms is not exactly the scenario I had in mind.
No sireee...
(the Girls arrive with a wet washcloth and a glass of water)
Thank you.
(she places the wash cloth on her forehead, shuts her eyes)
And furthermore and much worse, is the fact that I've been lied to by my
own children and I'd like to know why.
[On that note, Martin passes through the room wearing only a SPEEDO BATHING SUIT. Elizabeth cracks open an eye, sits up.]
ELIZABETH
Martin! What are you doing?
MARTIN
Going for a swim. Do you mind?
ELIZABETH
No, no, that's perfectly perfect. By all means, yes, have fun... someone
ought to. Just put on a shirt... my God...
[She lies down again as Chessy ENTERS from an adjoining room with Sammy. She stops when she sees Martin.]
CHESSY
Oh... Hell-o.
MARTIN
Hello, Hello...
[There seems to be something in the air between them.]
ELIZABETH
Oh, Chessy, this is our butler, Martin.
CHESSY
(plainly interested, extends her hand)
How do you do?
(indicates Hallie)
I'm her butler.
MARTIN
(gallantly kissing her hand)
Enchante, mademoiselle.
CHESSY
Gee, the pleasure's all mine, monsieur.
[The Girls can't believe it and suppress their giggles.]
ELIZABETH
Girls! You were going to tell me why you lied and brought me here without
telling your father!?!
CHESSY
Were they? Okay, that's good.
(starts tip-toeing out)
Well, then why don't I just slip back into my room and check out the ol'
mini bar...
MARTIN
(trying to escape)
Allow me to assist you...
ELIZABETH
(sits straight up)
Wait! You mean everyone knows but me?!? What's going on here?
[Everyone freezes.]
ANNIE
Mom... Daddy's getting married.
ELIZABETH
Oh. I see... getting married...
ANNIE
-- To Cruella de Ville. She's awful, Mom...We can't let him go through with
it.
ELIZABETH
Girls, your father's a grown man and quite capable of deciding whom he wishes
to marry..
HALLIE
But she's all wrong for him. And the only way he won't marry her is...
(to Annie)
You tell her, she knows you better.
ANNIE
Is if he sees you again.
ELIZABETH
(piecing-it together)
You're trying to fix me up with your father.
HALLIE
Why not? You're perfect for each other.
ANNIE
A match made in heaven.
[By now, Chessy and Martin have reached the door.]
ELIZABETH
Hold it! You two knew about this?
MARTIN AND CHESSY
(turn, ad libbing at the same time)
No. Not exactly. We tried to reason with them. What could we do? They made
us do it. We're the hired help. Don't fire us. It was a mistake.
ELIZABETH
(rises unsteadily)
Okay, let me say this loud and clear. Nick Parker and I have nothing in common...
anymore. Plus, in case you haven't noticed, he seems extremely content with
his leggy, long haired, tight-skirted fiance. I want the two of you to explain
to your father that I am here for one purpose only and that's to switch you
two back. Now, let's do what we have to do and be done with it. Understood?
[CLOSE ANGLE - MEREDITH in THE SUITE NEXT DOOR.]
MEREDITH
No. I don't understand.
[Nick nervously runs his fingers through his hair and straightens his clothes as he tries to get out the door.]
NICK
I just need to go downstairs for a few minutes to c-c-clear my head... then
I'll meet you for lunch.
MEREDITH
Clear your head? What do you have to clear your head about? Is something
wrong?
NICK
I hope not. I mean... no. What could be wrong? We're getting married in ten
days, everything's perfect.
(then, quickly)
I gotta go.
He quickly kisses her on the cheek, opens the door.
MEREDITH
We're still going ring shopping after lunch, right?
NICK
Ring shopping?
MEREDITH
Nicky!
NICK
Of course! For the funeral. I mean, for the wedding.
MEREDITH
The funeral?!?
NICK
I'm kidding.
(laughs)
Don't listen to me. I'll see you there. I mean, here. Downstairs.
[He slips out the door, hurries down the CORRIDOR and bumps right into Annie.]
ANNIE
(as Hallie)
Hey, Dad, what's up?
NICK
Just running down to the lobby. Hey, Hal, do me a favor, keep Meredith company,
willya?
(rushing off)
Thanks, kiddo.
(turns back)
Do I look allright? Like presentable and everything? Not too old?
ANNIE
You look fab, Dad. Young and fabulous.
[LOBBY - MOMENTS LATER
Nick rushes off the elevator, looks around for Elizabeth. lie turns a corner
and bumps into the real Hallie, who hasn't seen her Dad all summer.]
HALLIE
Dad!
NICK
I thought you were going to keep Meredith company?
HALLIE
I was? I mean, I am. Yeah. I was actually just looking for her.
(then)
It's great to see you, Dad. She can't help herself and gives her Dad a quick
hug.
NICK
It's great to see you too, squirt.
(pats her on the tush)
Now go on, get up there.
[Nick heads off in one direction as CAMERA TRACKS Hallie back to the elevators.
An elevator PINGS and Meredith steps out, checking herself in a compact.
She snaps the lid shut when she sees Hallie
(who has never laid eye’s on Meredith).
MEREDITH
Have you seen your father?
HALLIE
You talkin' to me?
MEREDITH
What are you, Robert DeNiro? Yes, I'm talking to you.
HALLIE
(realizes)
Oh! Meredith... Uh, yeah, I just saw him...
MEREDITH
(straightens out her suit)
Well, hel-lo? Where was he?
HALLIE
Oh, he went; thataway, I think.
(sizing her up)
MEREDITH
What are you staring at?
HALLIE
Oh, nothing. You really are pretty... -that's all.
MEREDITH
Don't tell me you're going to break your rotten streak and suddenly be nice
to me?
(starts off)
If you see your father, tell him I'm waiting.
HALLIE
(to herself, as Meredith exits)
Whatever you say, Cruella.
[EXT. HOTEL CORRIDOR
Nick ducks his head into THE HOTEL GIFT SHOP, looking for Elizabeth. Instead,
he sees Annie buying a candy bar. He does a double-take.]
NICK
What are you doing? I thought you were gonna...
ANNIE
-- She wasn't in her room, Dad.
NICK
She wasn't? Oh... okay... See you in a little bit, kid.
ANNIE
If not sooner, Dad.
[INT. HOTEL CORRIDOR - MOMENTS LATER
Nick walks along the corridor, looks through a bank of windows and thinks
he sees Elizabeth walking through the HOTEL'S GARDEN. He tries to get a closer
look but gets caught in the midst of a group of Japanese Tourists.
Elizabeth notices him and gives a little wave.
Nick weaves through the Tourists but when he gets to the patio, Elizabeth
is gone. Discouraged, he pauses, then SEES Hallie sitting in a large wicker
chair, under a palm tree, sipping a fruit cocktails He jumps, surprised.]
HALLIE
Lookin', for somebody, Dad?
[HOTEL BAR - MOMENTS LATER
Meredith enters, takes a seat at the nearly empty bar. only one other customer
sits at the bar - Elizabeth. Meredith sits one stool away from her.
The Bartender delivers a red concoction to Elizabeth, who holds a glass of
ice to her head.]
BARTENDER
Here you go. This'll cure anything you got. Just don't ask what's in it.
ELIZABETH
(hesitates)
Okay... Here's to..
(turns to Meredith, not recognizing her)
[Here's to you. May your life be far less complicated than mine.]
MEREDITH
Thank you...
[Elizabeth tosses down the drink and winces at the taste.]
MEREDITH
(orders)
Martini, dry and a pack of Parliaments.
[Elizabeth belches.]
ELIZABETH
Excuse me...
(to Meredith)
I apologize. Really, I'm so...
(belches again)
-- sorry. I think I just drank tar.
[The Bartender hands Meredith her drink and Elizabeth her bill. Elizabeth signs her check and Meredith sneaks a peak at her signature, practically choking on her Martini.]
MEREDITH
You're Elizabeth James?
ELIZABETH
Guilty.
MEREDITH
I can't believe it. You're the designer, Elizabeth James?
ELIZABETH
Still guilty.
MEREDITH
I faxed your office just yesterday. I saw a wedding dress you designed and
fell completely in love with it. Your office said you were out of town and
they didn't know if you could make another one. I can't believe it. This
is fate.
(moves to' seat next to her, extending her hand)
I'm Meredith Blake.
ELIZABETH
(shaking her hand)
How do you do?
[MEANWHILE - AT THE POOL
Nick steps into the sunlight, still searching for Elizabeth. He sees a Woman
resembling Elizabeth sitting under a large straw hat. He crosses to her,
takes a quick peek, realizes it's not her and smiles an apology to the Lady
and her BodyBuilder Husband. He backs into an umbrella as Meredith's Parents
join him.]
MR. BLAKE
There you are! We've been looking all over for you!
MRS. BLAKE
Nicholas, I think this hotel is perfect for the wedding... The more I see
of it, the more I like it.
NICK
(still looking around)
Me too. Absolutely.
[Nick glances across the pool and spots Elizabeth arrive, talking on a cell phone. She waves shyly at Nick, slipping on sunglasses.]
MRS. BLAKE
Tell me, dear, how many guests will there be from your side of the family?
Just a guesstimate?
NICK
(staring across at Elizabeth)
I'm not sure at the moment... Can I get back to you on that one?
MRS. BLAKE
Of course, And are we thinking formal attire or...
[A small contingent passes in front of Elizabeth, blocking her from Nick's view. Not wanting to lose her, Nick darts around a Towel Boy, side-steps a couple of Toddlers, then trips over a rubber duck.]
CHESSY
(lying on a chaise next to Martin, looks up)
Boss, you okay?
[Nick glances over at her, gets tangled up in Sammy's leash and almost crashes right into Annie.]
ANNIE
Dad! Watch out!
[Too late! Annie and Sammy jump out of the way as Nick SPLASHES head first into the deep end of the-pool. ELIZABETH TURNS and SEES Nick pulling himself out of the pool and coming toward her, soaking wet, cheek bleeding, not looking terribly happy.]
ELIZABETH
Nick, hello... Long time no see...
(backing up)
Please try not to go crazy...
NICK
A little late for that advice. What is going on? I haven't seen or heard
from you in eleven years and suddenly you're popping up everywhere I look
and naturally on the day I'm--
[Annie appears at her Mother's side.]
ANNIE
-- Dad, I can explain why she's here.
NICK
Hallie, you know who this is?
ANNIE
Actually, yes. And actually I'm not Hallie.
[Hallie appears on Elizabeth's other side.]
HALLIE
Actually, I am.
[Nick looks from ANNIE to HALLIE, back to ANNIE, then to Elizabeth. She's nods. He's speechless.]
NICK
Both of them? Annie... Hallie...
ANNIE
I guess you and Mom sort of think alike, cause you both sent us to the same
camp. We met and the whole thing kind of just spilled out.
ELIZABETH
They decided to switch places on us, Nick.
NICK
Wait a minute. You mean I've had Annie all this time?
ANNIE
(nods)
I wanted to know what you were like and Hallie wanted to know Mom. Are you
angry?
[It takes a moment to sink in, then Nick takes Annie in his arms.]
NICK
Honey, of course not. It's just... I can't believe it's you. The last time
I saw you... you had diaper rash. Look at you...
ANNIE
Well, I'm quite grown up now and quite without a father.
HALLIE
And I'm headed into my crazy mixed-UP teenage years and I'll be the only
girl I know without a mother to fight with.
NICK
(still trying to put it together)
Hal, you've been in London all this time?
(Hallie nods)
Come here.
[He pulls her to him..]
HALLIE
Mom's amazing, Dad... I don't know how you ever let her go.
ELIZABETH
Girls, why don't you let your father and I talk for a couple of minutes,
okay?
[The Girls take off. Nick grabs a towel ... dries his hair.]
NICK
Oh, man, I can't believe this. Seeing them together... and you... and...
(a beat)
How are you, Lizzie or does everyone call you Elizabeth now?
ELIZABETH
No, no, Lizzie's fine. My Dad still calls me Lizzie. I've been terrific.
How 'bout you?
NICK
Well, I've had better days.
(touches his cheek)
Ouch!
ELIZABETH
Let me help you with that?
(to passing Towel Boy)
Excuse me, do you have a First-Aid kit?
TOWEL BOY
Sure.
ELIZABETH
Okay, lie down...
[Nick lies on a chaise as the Towel Boy returns with a First Aid Kit. Elizabeth sits beside Nick, tending to his cut.]
NICK
(looking up at her)
How is your Dad, still sneaking those stogies?
ELIZABETH
Every day.
[They exchange a smile.]
NICK
I can't believe it, you haven't changed at all...
ELIZABETH
You thought maybe I'd be fat and grey?
NICK
Well, not grey...
(then)
Ouch!
MEREDITH'S VOICE
-- Finally! There you are!
[Nick and Elizabeth turn, looking CLOSE ENOUGH to be kissing. Meredith is taken aback.]
MEREDITH
(thrown by seeing them together)
Oh. You've met Elizabeth. Good. Honey, Elizabeth's going to make my... wedding
gown... But, I
don't understand... How did you two meet and why are you so wet?
NICK
I wasn't paying attention and I...
(turns to Elizabeth)
You're making My fiance's wedding gown?
ELIZABETH
Nick, I didn't know she was Y OUR fiance...
NICK
(confused)
How did we meet? How did you two meet?
MEREDITH
Am I missing something here?
NICK
Sweetheart, you know what? This is one small world...
MEREDITH
How small?
[Just then, Annie arrives.]
ANNIE
Oh, hi, Mer.
HALLIE
(nervously)
I can't. Mom, sorry, I have to go out of town today.
ELIZABETH
You have to go out of town?
(thinks she's kidding)
And where may I ask are you going?
Hallie SQUIRMS UNDER THE COVERS, entirely disappearing.
MEREDITH
Hello.
HALLIE
(joining Annie)
How ya' doin'?
[Meredith SCREAMS at seeing double.]
NICK
Honey, did I ever mention Hallie was a twin?
MEREDITH
No, as a matter of fact, you didn't. Two of them?!? How fabulous.
HALLIE
Don't feel bad, Mer, he never mentioned it to me, either. Imagine My surprise.
By the way, I'm the real Hallie. This is Annie. She was just pretending to
be me while I was in London pretending to be her. And this is our Mom, Elizabeth
James. By the way Dad, I want to change my name to Hallie James-Parker.
MEREDITH
She is your mother?
GIRLS
Yes.
MEREDITH
(to Elizabeth)
You were married to Nick?
ELIZABETH
Guilty again.
MEREDITH
Well, this is a small world.
NICK
And getting smaller.
MEREDITH
And what a coincidence that we're all here on the same exact weekend.
ELIZABETH
It's not exactly a coincidence. The children arranged it so their father
and I could work out their
custody situation.
[The Girls smile.]
MEREDITH
The children arranged it? Oh. How sweet.
[INT. TIFFANY'S - THAT AFTERNOON
CLOSE on a JEWELRY CASE filled with DIAMOND ENGAGEMENT RINGS. CAMERA TILTS
UP to find Nick and Meredith, browsing in Tiffany's.]
MEREDITH
I'm sorry, I just don't see why you have to have dinner with your ex-wife
with her little 'Mary Poppins' accent. Why couldn't you just meet her in
the lobby, discuss the custody, shake hands and say good-bye? I'll tell you
why - because your daughters don't want me to marry you.
NICK
That's not true.
MEREDITH
(to Saleswoman)
Can we have some help over here, please?
(then)
It-s totally true. They see me as the, evil step-mother., Trust me, I'm not
being paranoid. Those girls have something up their sleeve...
(without missing a beat, to Saleswoman)
Can I try on the emerald cut please? No, the bigger one... The biggest one.
NICK
Honey, calm down. The girls have never had a meal with both their parents
in their entire lives. How could I say no?
MEREDITH
(lightening up as she slips on the ring)
I told you to let me represent you on all your negotiations, didn't I?
(showing,him the ring)
This is incredible. What do you think?
NICK
I think I have to get dressed for dinner.
MEREDITH
(whines)
Nicky...
NICK
If you love it. I love it.
MEREDITH
(throws her arms around him)
I love it.
[EXT. FOUR SEASONS HOTEL - THAT NIGHT
Nick and Hallie exit, both dressed to the nines. A LIMO waits by the curb.]
NICK
Hal, I've had enough surprises for one day... just tell me where we're going...
HALLIE
You're gonna love it, Dad, trust me.
Just then, Elizabeth and Annie step out of the hotel. Elizabeth is wearing
the red dress Martin
recommended. Nick tries not to admire her too openly.
NICK
Hey... Hi.
ELIZABETH
Hi. So do you know where they're taking us?
NICK
She won't crack.
ANNIE
(as they cross to Limo, hands them eye shades)
Okay, now put these on. You can take them off when we reach our destination.
NICK
We're going in a limo?
HALLIE
You want one of us to drive?
(off Nick's look)
Please, indulge us.
[A DARK STREET - NIGHT
A FOGHORN sounds, as the Limo pulls to a stop. The Girls hurry out.]
ANNIE
Okay, you can take them off.
[Nick and Elizabeth exit, taking off their blindfolds. Their eyes widen as
they look ahead and SEE:
AN EXQUISITE 150 FOOT YACHT all lit up and bobbing gently in the sparkling
Bay.]
HALLIE
She's ours for the night.
NICK
And exactly how are we paying for her?
ANNIE
Hallie and I pooled our allowances.
[Nick and Elizabeth look at her doubtfully.]
ANNIE
Okay, Grandfather pitched in a bit.
(they continue looking at her)
Okay, he pitched in a lot.
[Nick and Elizabeth exchange a quizzical look, as they follow -the Girls down the steps to the DECK, where a Uniformed Captain welcomes them aboard.]
HALLIE
Okay folks, right this way...
[Hallie and Annie open a pair of DOUBLE DOORS:]
HALLIE
Ta da!
[And in front of them, they SEE:
AN ROMANTIC DINING ROOM
where a candle-lit table is set for two. The windows reveal the San Francisco
Bay, lit by the yacht's twinkling lights.]
NICK
The table's only set for two.
ANNIE
That's the other part of the surprise we're not joining you.
ELIZABETH
You're not?
[The Girls smile and shake their heads as Chessy ENTERS, dressed as a Ship's Steward, in tropical white.]
CHESSY
No, but I am. Good evening, I'm Chessy, I'll be your server tonight. No
wisecracks please.
[At that moment, out steps Martin, also dressed in ship's whites and carrying a bottle of champagne.]
MARTIN
And I'm Martin, your Sommelier. May I offer you both a taste of the bubbly
in hopes that you'll get a little snickered and won't can this lovely lady
and myself for following the orders of two eleven year-olds...
CHESSY
Annie, mood music, if you please.
[Annie pushes a few buttons and the LIGHTS DIM. Moonlight spills into the
room as we HEAR
Sade's Smooth Oper-ator play over the cabin's speakers.]
ANNIE
(like a hypnotist)
Relax... Sail through time...
HALLIE
-- Back to yesteryear...
[The Girls disappear behind double doors, leaving Nick and Elizabeth looking thoroughly confused. Chessy approaches with a tray of hors d'oeuvres.]
CHESSY
You don't get it, do you? Smooth Oper-ator...'Big hit in 1986 ... The year
you two met... Hors
d'oeuvre?
ELIZABETH
So, that's what this is all about.
[Nick notices a LIFE RAFT with a homemade sign that says QE 2 hanging on the wall.]
NICK
They're recreating the night we met ... The boat... the music ...
CHESSY
(points to herself)
The help.
ELIZABETH
(a little misty-eyed)
It's incredibly sweet.
NICK
Martin, I think I'll have that drink.
[Martin pours them both champagne, then he and Chessy slip away.]
NICK
To tell you the truth, I haven't been on a boat since the -QE 2.
ELIZABETH
Neither have I.
[A soft wind blows Elizabeth's hair.]
NICK
(taken with her, lifts his glass)
Well then, here's to...
ELIZABETH
(finishing his sentence, lifts her glass)
Our daughters.
NICK
(not exactly what he was thinking, but okay)
To our daughters.
[THROUGH A PORTHOLE
Hallie and Annie sneak a peek, thrilled to see their Parents toasting.
BACK TO SCENE]
NICK
You know, I always see you in Hallie. I always have. Something about her
eyes ...
ELIZABETH
That's funny. I always see you in Annie. Something about her smile.
[An awkward moment, they each sip their champagne. As they glance over at the porthole, the Girls drop out of sight.]
NICK
Now I know how a goldfish feels.
(re: Girls)
They turned out pretty good though, huh?
ELIZABETH
We've been lucky.
NICK
Sometime, if we're ever really alone maybe we could talk about... what happened
between us. It all feels a bit hazy to me now... It ended so fast.
ELIZABETH
It started so fast.
NICK
Now that part I remember perfectly.
THROUGH ANOTHER PORTHOLE
Chessy and Martin watch.
MARTIN
Looks like things are heating up nicely. I'd say it's safe to serve
the vichyssoise.
CHESSY
You ladle, I'll serve.
[They start back toward the galley. It's tight, they try to pass one another and get momentarily stuck, their eyes lock, then they squeeze past each other.]
MARTIN
(pulling himself together)
Yes, I'll ladle.
CHESSY
Right. And I'll...
MARTIN
-serve.
CHESSY
Right.
[THE DINING ROOM - SAME TIME]
ELIZABETH
So, you've done incredibly well. Your dream of owning your own vineyard...
it actually came true.
NICK
Hey, how about you, always drawing on napkins and corners of newspapers?
Now you're this major designer... pretty impressive.
.ELIZABETH
Yeah, it's amazing. We both actually got where we wanted to go...
NICK
Yep. We did.
[Chessy ENTERS carrying two bowls of soup and places them in front of Elizabeth and Nick.]
NICK
So, what do we do about the girls?
ELIZABETH
Well, I guess now that they've met, we can't very well keep them apart. I
could keep them half the year and you could--
CHESSY
-- Guys, they can't go to two schools every year.
NICK
I agree.
ELIZABETH
Okay, I could keep them for a whole year, then you could--
NICK
-- Liz, this is why we...
(looks at Chessy.)
CHESSY
Sorry. Ignore me. I'm gone.
[She backs out of the room.]
NICK
This is why we came up with the solution we have.
ELIZABETH
Really? I thought it was because we decided never to see each other again.
NICK
Not kM Lizzie...
ELIZABETH
You know that part's become a bit hazy for me too over the years.
NICK
You don't remember the day you packed?
ELIZABETH
No, that day I remember perfectly. Did I hurt you when I threw that suitcase?
I've often wondered.
NICK
(rubbing his shoulder)
Let's put it this way, I'll never pitch for the Yankees.
(starts his soup, stops)
So how come you never got married again? I always figured by now you'd be
re-married with a new family...
ELIZABETH
Me? No... no, no... no...
NICK
That's a lot of Inols'..
ELIZABETH
That's because I realized a long time ago marriage wasn't for me...
[A beat of silence. Nick starts to eat again, stops.]
NICK
You know I may be alone with you again, so... About the day you packed...
Why'd you do it?
ELIZABETH
Nick, we were getting along so badly, we found out we each had tempers, we
said foolish things... So I packed... Got on my first 747 and... you didn't
come after me.
[Dead silence.]
NICK
I didn't know I was supposed to.
ELIZABETH
Well, it really doesn't matter now... Let's put on a good face for the kids,
shall we and get this show on the road...
(looks at her watch)
Gosh, I'm still on London time, so...
NICK
(resigned)
Okay. Yeah. You're right. Let's get the show on the road.
[Elizabeth starts her soup. Nick joins her, not a word passing between
them.
ANGLE - THE PORTHOLE
Annie and Hallie watch, crestfallen.
EXT. FOUR SEASONS HOTEL - ESTABLISHING - FOLLOWING A.M. INT. HOTEL LOBBY
- FRONT DESK - SAME TIME
Elizabeth signs her bill, turns to Martin who tips the Bell Hop.]
ELIZABETH
All set then. Where's Annie?
MARTIN
I just called, she's on her way down.
[Nick and Chessy join them. Everyone's spirits are low.]
NICK
Okay, so I'll uh... send Hallie back to you over Christmas.
ELIZABETH
And I'll see that Annie spends Easter with you.
[The ELEVATOR OPENS and Hallie and Annie step off, dressed identically in T-shirts and overalls. It's impossible to tell them apart.]
NICK
(to Annie)
This one's Hallie, I'm positive.
HALLIE
(grins at him)
I hope you're right, Dad. You wouldn't want to send the wrong kid all the
way back to England.
[Nick looks to Elizabeth, he can't be sure.]
ANNIE
Here's our proposition. We go back to Dad's house, pack our stuff and the
four of us leave on the camping trip.
ELIZABETH
The four of us!?
ANNIE
And when you bring us back, we'll tell you who's Hallie and who's Annie.
ELIZABETH
Or... You do as we say and I take one of you back with me to London whether
you like or not.
[CUT TO: A 747 SOARING INTO A CLEAR BLUE SKY
BOOMS DOWN to... EXT. NICK'S HOUSE - NAPA - THAT AFTERNOON
As FOUR SLEEPING BAGS are tossed into the TRUNK of Nick's SUBURBAN. Nick
throws in the final bag as Meredith watches, wearing a tight suit and
sunglasses.]
MEREDITH
What am I supposed to do for three days sit home and knit?
[Elizabeth exits the house looking very Out of Africa, carrying a backpack.]
MEREDITH
Excuse me, what is she doing here?
NICK
That was the deal - the four of us go together.
MEREDITH
What are you suddenly, the Brady Bunch? This is ridic--
ELIZABETH
-- Hi, Meredith.
(off her look)
Everything okay?
MEREDITH
Well, no, as a matter of fact, it isn't. I didn't realize you were going
on this little outing and to tell you the truth, I'm not so sure I am okay
with it.
ELIZABETH
I agree. The ex-wife in the next sleeping bag is a little weird...
MEREDITH
Thank you.
ELIZABETH
I insist you come with us, really. Meredith stops cold.
NICK
Liz ...
ELIZABETH
Nick, I messed-up up your entire weekend, it's the least I can do to pay
you back.
[EXT. NICK'S HOUSE - A FEW MINUTES LATER
Annie and Hallie exit-with Chessy. As the Kids climb into the car, they notice
Elizabeth and Meredith come out of the house. Meredith is now dressed in
tight black work-out gear.]
HALLIE
Dad, what's Meredith doing here?
NICK
(getting behind the wheel)
Your mother invited her. Be nice.
[The Girls look at each other, then to Chessy, as Meredith smiles and climbs into the front seat.]
ELIZABETH
(closes door)
Okay. Have fun everybody.
NICK
Liz, what are you doing?
ELIZABETH
I really think you and Meredith need time alone before the big day.
ANNIE
Mom! Come on, that's not the plan.
ELIZABETH
Honestly, you'll have much more fun without me.
MEREDITH
(having second thoughts)
Look, if you're not going... I don't have to go... Trust me, I'm not exactly
a big nature girl.
ELIZABETH
But this'll be your chance to really get to know the girls... Starting next
week, they're half yours.
[Nick catches Elizabeth's eye. She blows him a kiss.]
ELIZABETH
Have fun ya'll!
[As the car pulls off, Chessy turns to Elizabeth.]
CHESSY
I would pay to see that woman climb a mountain.
[A VISTA OF RUGGED TERRAIN as far as the eye can see. CAMERA DISCOVERS Hallie and Annie climbing a steep hill, wearing back-packs and baseball caps. They're followed by Meredith, puffing and perspiring, dabbing sunscreen,on her nose as she tries to keep her balance. Nick brings up the rear. Meredith plops down on a rock, trying to catch her breath.]
MEREDITH
I'm gonna kill my trainer... He says I'm in such great shape...
(rubbing her legs)
I can't believe people actually do this for fun.
NICK
(calls)
Girls, hold on, we"re stopping.
HALLIE
(coming back towards them)
Again? Dad, at this rate, It'll take three days just to get up the mountain.
NICK
Meredith isn't used to the altitude... Just chill, okay?
[Behind Nick and Meredith, we SEE Annie SLIPPING LARGE ROCKS into meredith's
Prada
Backpack.]
MEREDITH
Somebody hand me my Evian... I can't move.
[Annie spots a SMALL LIZARD, grabs it and places it on top of Meredith's water bottle.]
ANNIE
Here you go, Mer.
[Meredith takes the bottle, lifts it to her mouth and finds herself EYE-TO-EYE with the LIZARD. She SCREAMS, tossing the Evian bottle in the air, losing her balance and SLIPPING off the rock.
NICK
Honey, you okay?
ANNIE
(catching the Lizard)
This little guy was on her Evian bottle, I guess.
(holding Lizard upside down by it's tail)
He won't hurt you, Mer.
MEREDITH
(SCREAMS again)
Get it away from me! I hate things that .crawl. It's disgusting... It's a
lizard, it should be a belt. Ugh, how can you touch it? Put it down!
ANNIE
Okay.
[Annie walks behind Meredith and gently DEPOSITS the Lizard right on top of Meredith's head.]
NICK
Why don't I take the lead, you two help Meredith.
[Nick moves off. Meredith rises, still not knowing the Lizard sits on top of her head.]
MEREDITH
(to Girls)
Sure, you're going to help me... right over a cliff, you'll help me.
HALLIE
(sotto, to Annie)
Not a bad idea. See any cliffs?
[Meredith GROANS as she now lifts her much heavier backpack.]
ANNIE
Need a hand?
MEREDITH
(pulling away)
Not from you, thank you. Don't think I can't see right past those angelic
faces. one more trick from you two and I promise I'll make your lives miserable
from the day I say I do'. Got it?
HALLIE
Got it, Cruella.
MEREDITH
(turns)
What'd you call me?
HALLIE
Nothing. Not a thing...
(sotto)
Cruella.
(then, turns back)
oh, Mer... I think there's something on your head...
[The Girls-walk ahead. Meredith reaches up and feels her hair... then her HAND lands on the LIZARD. She SCREAMS a BLOOD-CURDLING SCREAM and the Lizard panics and runs down her FACE and right INTO HER MOUTH. Meredith's EYES BULGE, she SPITS the Lizard out, GAGGING and COUGHING. Nick and the Girls run back.]
NICK
Are you okay?!? What happened?!
[Bright RED and in SHOCK, Meredith stomps her feet and points to Annie and Hallie. We can almost see the smoke pouring out of her ears.]
ANNIE
What did we do, Dad? We were with you.
[EXT. TRAIL - A LITTLE LATER
Meredith walks by herself, banging the buttons on her cell phone.]
MEREDITH
Please work... Hello? Hello?
[Meredith stops when she SEES Annie and Hallie bent over examining something
on the ground.
Meredith sneaks up behind them and OVERHEARS:]
ANNIE
I didn't know they had mountain lions up here.
HALLIE
Oh yeah, the place is crawling with them.
(winks at Annie)
An old Indian guide once showed me how to keep them away.
(picks up TWO STICKS and hits them together)
Just do this and they'll never come near you.
[The Girls pick up sticks and move off down the trail, CLACKING them together.
Meredith
stoops, picks up two sticks, CLACKS them together and follows.
A CRACKLING CAMP FIRE THAT NIGHT
Nick, the Girls and Meredith sit around the campfire. Everyone eats trout,
except Meredith, who sits on a rock, wrapped in a blanket, swatting at mosquitos
and rubbing lotion on her arm.]
ANNIE
You sure you don't want some trout, Mom? Is that okay, by the way? If we
start calling you Mom?
MEREDITH
I think your mother would prefer if you called me Meredith and no thank you,
I do not eat trout... for the thousandth time. I'll wait until breakfast.
What are we having?
NICK AND THE GIRLS
Trout.
NICK
We always live off the trail up here, it's part of the experience.
MEREDITH
(swatting away)
What's the other part, being eaten to death by mosquitos?
(swats at another mosquito, then looks at lotion)
You'd think they actually liked this stuff.
NICK
What is that you're using? (looks at the bottle, puts some on his hand)
You're going to attract every mosquito on the mountain. This is sugar and
water... Where'd you get this stuff?
[Meredith looks to the Girls, who busy themselves eating.]
MEREDITH
That's it. I'm taking a large sleeping pill and going to bed.
[She picks up her two sticks and WHACKS them together as she moves off toward her tent.]
NICK
Sweetheart, what are you doing?
MEREDITH
I don't want the mountain lions to...
(realizes she's been had)
There are no mountain lions up here, are there?
[Nick shakes his head. Meredith glares at the Girls, drops her sticks in the fire, walks to Nick and gives him a luscious kiss goodnight, smiles at the Girls and marches off to her tent.]
NICK
I'm telling you guys, lay off. This isn't her thing, okay? I'm not marrying
her because she's Annie
Oakley.
ANNIE
Who's Annie Oakley?
NICK
Just cool it.
[EXT. CAMPSITE - MIDNIGHT
Everything is quiet. An Owl HOOTS in the distance. The Girls sneak out of
their tent and tiptoe over to Meredith's tent.
INT . MEREDITH'S TENT
The Girls step inside, see Meredith fast asleep on her air mattress. They
position themselves at
Meredith's head and feet and on the "count of three", LIFT her up on her
mattress. It isn't easy. As they carry her out, Meredith moves her arm, brushing
her hand across Hallie's nose. Hallie twitches her nose but keeps going.
The Girls step out of the tent carrying Meredith on her mattress. CAMERA
TRACKS them down a path to the lake-front, where they quietly drag the air
mattress into THE LAKE, nod to each other and push her off.]
HALLIE
(watching Meredith drift away)
Sweet dreams, Mommy Dearest.
[EXT. LAKE - HIGH SHOT - DAWN
Meredith is sound asleep on her back in the middle of the lake. A BIRD rests
on-her nose.
CLOSER ANGLE - MEREDITH
She flops an arm into the water.]
MEREDITH
(in her sleep)
That feels so nice...
[She gently moves her fingers in the water, then her EYES SPRING OPEN. She looks straight up as the BIRD flaps its wings and flies across her face. Meredith SC sits up, realizes she's in the middle of the lake. She SC again, her voice ECHOING off the mountains.]
MEREDITH
Niiiiiick!!!!!!
[Nick sticks his head out of his tent, half-asleep, spots Meredith thrashing around, screaming, in the middle of the lake.]
NICK
What's she doing in the lake?
[Hallie and Annie peek out of their tent and see Meredith splashing back to the shore in her soaking wet pajamas. She storms past the campfire, kicks the coffee pot into the air and marches up to Nick. ]
NICK
What's going on?
MEREDITH
Here's what's going on, buddy, the day we say "I do" is the day I ship those
brats off to
Switzerland. Get the picture? It's me or them. Take your pick.
NICK
Them.
MEREDITH
Excuse me?
NICK
(spells)
T-H-E-M. Get the picture?
[EXT. NICK'S HOUSE - AT SUNSET
Elizabeth sits on a rocker on the front porch, reading when she hears Nick
and the Girls pull up. She rises to greet them.]
ELIZABETH
Back so soon? Did you have fun?
ANNIE
Not exactly.
HALLIE
We've been punished through the end of the century.
NICK
Starting now. Go.
ELIZABETH
Where's Meredith?
HALLIE
We played a couple of harmless tricks on her and she kinda freaked out a
little.
NICK
A little?
(shows Elizabeth the ring)
We broke up.
ELIZABETH
Oh, jeez ... This is all my fault. If I hadn't suggested she go...
NICK
-- Tricked her would be more like it. Like mother, like daughters...
ELIZABETH
I'm really sorry, Nick.
ANNIE
We are too, Dad... really.
HALLIE
Will you forgive us?
NICK
Up to your room!
(when they're gone, he smiles)
I gotta remember to thank them one day.
ELIZABETH
You're relieved?
NICK
I think I am.
(not wanting to talk about it)
I'm also starving... Chessy around?
[ELIZABETH .She and Martin went off on a picnic around noon... yesterday.]
(Nick looks up on that one)
Hopefully they'll be back... soonish...
NICK
Who would've thought my Nanny and your Butler...
(then)
So, listen, how 'bout I whip us up something to eat?
ELIZABETH
You know how to cook now?
NICK
of course, I know how to cook. I can make pasta... and pasta... and...
ELIZABETH
Pasta sounds good.
[UPSTAIRS HALLWAY - A FEW MINUTES LATER
Nick, now clean shaven and wearing fresh clothes, passes the Girl's room.
Inside, we SEE Hallie and Annie in pajamas, getting into bed.]
HALLIE
Wow! You look so nice, where are you going?)
NICK
(shutting their door)
Good night, Ladies!
[INT. KITCHEN - MOMENTS LATER
Elizabeth sets the table as Nick enters.]
NICK
Smells good in here.
ELIZABETH
Really? I'm just boiling water.
NICK
Oh. Then it must be you...
(takes out wine glasses)
So what are you in the mood for, red or white?
ELIZABETH
I think red.
NICK
Follow me...
[INT. STONE STAIRWELL
leading to Nick's private WINE CELLAR. A cavernous space lit by beautiful
lanterns. The walls are lined with bottles of wine... ladders lean against
the walls, library style.]
NICK
This is where I keep my private stash. Did you know I also collect
wine?
ELIZABETH
Oh really?
NICK
Yeah, I'm a man of limited interests.
[Elizabeth laughs. Nick leads her into a small cozy room, pulls a bottle from a rack.]
NICK
Here's a 1921 Burgundy... They say the rain that year made this the best
Burgundy ever harvested... Oh wait, you'll appreciate this one...
(shows her another bottle)
ELIZABETH
(reads label)
"V Day, 1946"... incredible.
NICK
Yeah, I love that...
(shows her another bottle)
The same wine my parents served at their wedding... a 152 Bordeaux. I think
my sister was conceived off this baby.
ELIZABETH
What's this-one?
(reads label)
Where Dreams Have No End... 1983.
NICK
That one actually took me years to track down.
ELIZABETH
Why, where's it from?
NICK
It's the wine we drank at our wedding. I now have every bottle ever made.
ELIZABETH
(completely thrown)
You do?
NICK
I do.
ELIZABETH
Can we open one?
NICK
You're the only one I'd drink it with.
[Nick pulls a bottle from the shelf, dusts it off. He looks at Elizabeth and sees her eyes are teary.]
NICK
You okay?
ELIZABETH
Just got a little dust in my eye...
NICK
I can offer you a clean sleeve to...
ELIZABETH
(pulling back from the offer)
No, no, I'm fine, now. Really. All better.
NICK
You don't always have to be so brave, you know.
ELIZABETH
Oh, but I do, actually...
[Just then, they HEAR the cellar door opening above them and footsteps.]
CHESSY (O.S.)
Anybody home?
[Nick hesitates, looks to Elizabeth, who.shrugs.]
NICK
Yeah... We're on our way up...
[Nick and Elizabeth climb the stairs and enter the KITCHEN where they are greeted by Martin and Chessy. Martin wears shades and a Laker baseball cap.]
ELIZABETH
Welcome back... How was the picnic?
CHESSY
Who knew the man wanted to eat in L.A.? We drove eight hours to have a picnic
in a city with no
parks.
MARTIN
But what a town! I saw mountains, beaches, I saw Michael Keaton, not to mention
I found out I have the same hand size as John Wayne and the same shoe size
as John Barrymore.
CHESSY
The man is a lot to handle... but a lot of fun. How was the camping trip?
Aren't you back early? Are we interrupting anything? We are. Let's go, Marty.
ELIZABETH
No, no, you're not interrupting anything. Are you hungry? In the mood
for some pasta?
[Nick looks at Elizabeth, wishing she hadn't invited them to stay.]
CHESSY
You don't mind? We haven't eaten since Hearst Castle.
NICK
No, no, it's fine.
ELIZABETH
I'll set the table for two more...
[As Chessy and in Join them, Nick slips the bottle of-wine into a cabinet
and closes the door.
CLOSE - ON A ROW OF SUITCASES
lined up IN FRONT OF NICK'S HOUSE. CAMERA TILTS UP as Elizabeth comes down
the front steps and joins Annie and Martin, who are dressed and ready to
go.]
ELIZABETH
Okay, then, I guess that's that. We're really off this time.
[ANGLE NICK, HALLIE, CHESSY AND SAMMY
sadly watching as a Cab Driver loads the baggage into the trunk. The Girls
hug and promise to see each other over Thanksgiving. Chessy and Martin hug
and promise to see each other over Christmas... Then Nick and Elizabeth
hug in a distant way and let go very quickly.]
NICK
Take care of yourself.
ELIZABETH
You too.
[The trunk is closed and Elizabeth hugs Hallie hard... Nick hugs Annie.
Elizabeth, Annie and Martin wave, then duck into the cab. As the taxi pulls
off, Chessy, Hallie and Sammy all look up to Nick. He turns away...
EXT. LONDON - ESTABLISHING - DAY
A Taxi ENTERS FRAME, rounds a corner and pulls up in front of Elizabeth's
town house.
INT. ELIZABETH'S TOWN HOUSE - MOMENTS LATER Elizabeth and Annie ENTER, dropping
their bags by the front door.]
ELIZABETH
Hi ... We're home!
[They don't hear anything.]
ANNIE
(calls out)
Grandfather?
ELIZABETH
I'll check his study.
[Elizabeth ENTERS THE STUDY, and sure enough, there he is, sitting behind the desk, hidden behind The Financial Times.]
ELIZABETH
Hey stranger...
[The paper comes down and Elizabeth SEES it's HALLIE sitting behind the desk.]
HALLIE
Hi, Mom. Did you know the Concorde gets you here in half the time?
ELIZABETH
(stunned)
Yeah, I've heard that...
[Annie arrives in the door behind Elizabeth, shocked to see Hallie.]
ANNIE
What are you doing here?
HALLIE
It took us around thirty seconds after you left to realize we didn't want
to lose you two again.
ELIZABETHWe?
NICK
(appears from the doorway behind Hallie)
We. I made the mistake of not coming after you once, Lizzie and I wasn't
going to do it again... no matter how brave you are.
[Elizabeth looks across the study at Nick, her eyes once again filling up, a smile on her face.]
ELIZABETH
Thank you.
[They stand frozen, their eyes locked on each other.]
ANNIE
Pssst....
[She signals for Hallie to Join her in the hall.
EXT. STUDY - SECONDS LATER
Hallie rushes up to Annie.]
HALLIE
We did it! We did it!
[They hug.]
ANNIE
It's unbelievable.
HALLIE
OhmyGod, you guys are gonna love living in California....
ANNIE
What do you mean ... California? You two are going to love living in London...
HALLIE
London???
[CLOSE ON ELIZABETH AND NICK
embracing by the window. CAMERA PULLS BACK through the WINDOW and CONTINUES
into THE FRONT YARD, revealing Chessy and Martin, in each other's arms. CAMERA
BOOMS UP and AWAY finally REVEALING Sammy barking in the front yard at a
little Poodle in the yard next door. And as Grandfather walks down the street,
opens the garden gate and enters the path to the house, we:
FADE OUT:]
THE END
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