Written
by Kari
Based on some situations originated by James Cameron.
She sat alone with the stars, pondering her
life, her world...pondering everything. It was the middle of April, and Rosie
shivered slightly, hugging her arms around her legs.
Destin, Florida, at night. Still a bit too
cold to go swimming, but Rosie could sit or walk on the beach for hours and
hours. Her parents didn't understand her. They never had.
Rosie sighed as she sat down in the sand,
loving the way the moon cast a trail of light down the ocean, as if leaving a
trail to infinity. The breeze swept across her cheeks, reddening them.
The date was April 15, 2014. The one hundred
second anniversary of the Titanic. For the past months, dreams of the ship had
been haunting her. She was unsure of why, but she would wake up in the middle
of the night with feelings of dread and despair, and she'd have the fleeting
feeling that she'd been dreaming about the ship, and about a girl.
Rosie couldn't tell her parents. They'd just
tell her that her dreams were caused by the excitement of the Titan. The Titan
was to commemorate the original Titanic. Like the Titanic, she was to be the
largest moving object built by the hand of man, and the most luxurious ship of
the day. And to prevent the same mistakes as before, all precautions were to be
taken. The safety of the Titan and her passengers was to come first.
Rosie didn't trust it one bit. She knew that
history had a tendency to repeat itself. Nevertheless, she found herself
intrigued by the idea. She knew that the plans for the Titan's launch had been
the one hundredth anniversary of Titanic, but the date had been set back to the
one hundred third due to construction problems.
Rosie laid her head back against the sand,
oblivious to the fact that it stuck in her red curls, tangling them. She felt a
wave wash in, rinsing her bare feet in its salty coolness. She raised her wrist
above her face, peering at her watch.
12:30.
Not time yet. She opened her eyes, once again
letting them trace over the blackness of the nighttime waters, wondering what
the water had felt like to them--the people who died on the ship. Had it seemed
like a great monster as they watched it swallow the ship into the darkness
forever? Had they feared it when they had been stranded on its surface, their
only company the dying screams of those around them? Had they feared the
coldness as it enveloped them whole, sucking the life from their frozen bodies?
Rosie shuddered at the thought. In the
distance, lightning clashed overhead, momentarily lighting up the dark ocean.
She smiled as she tasted the first hint of rain on her lips. Look at the
shore--look at how it seems so much like the edge of the universe. Why, it
leads to oblivion. At night, it was difficult to tell where the black waters
ended and the sky began. It seemed like an endless void, and Rosie could walk off
into it, and disappear into its powerful waves forever.
These were her last fleeting thoughts as her
body numbed with exhaustion. Time for the dreams again--the dreams of Titanic,
and of the girl, Rose. In her dreams, she was Rose. Rose even looked like her.
And like her, Rose was sad.
She caught shattered images of a handsome,
dark-haired man, with cold eyes. He struck her! He made her cry. Around her,
there was luxury, but it was so ugly to her. She was wearing a gorgeous gown of
red and black. But she hated it. She hated all of it! Her hair was free, her
red curls whipping around her face, but she hardly noticed as the tears
streaked down her reddened cheeks.
She ran and ran and ran, but she couldn't
escape her sorrow. She couldn't escape the man that she wanted to love but
feared too much to ever do so. She couldn't escape her chains that held her
captive. So she ran...until there was no more ship.
She found herself staring over the back of
the grand ship, the black waters roaring underneath, and spreading out into the
infinite distance. The ship seemed to be floating in never ending darkness, and
it was heading into nothingness. Nothingness. Strangely, it beckoned her. She
went to it--her freedom, her salvation. Those waters would take it all away. Before
she had time to think, she was over the railing, peering, down, down,
down...and the water was below her--those black nighttime waters, ready to
swallow her.
The sight suddenly terrified her, but she
couldn't turn back now. She would be joining her father soon. Here I come,
Daddy.
"Don't do it."
Rose was brought back to reality by this
voice. It struck her suddenly what she was doing. She turned her head, and
through her tears she saw the most striking pair of blue eyes she had ever
beheld. Those eyes were full of depth--they held a compassion for others;
concern for a first-class girl he did not know.
Despite the situation, she couldn't help but
be stunned. "Stay where you are!" she cried. More words were spoken,
but she could not concentrate. The young man's words were fading away, becoming
a beacon of calm for her in the chaotic darkness. Dimly, she saw
herself--Rose--take the man's hand, and electricity passed between them,
thrilling them.
But before she could find out what happened
next, they were gone, and Titanic was disappearing into the blackness...
Rosie awoke suddenly to the sound of thunder
crashing overhead. It was beginning to pour now, and her clothing and hair
became drenched. She looked at her watch. 2:20. The ship was disappearing into
the water this very instant--one hundred two years ago, that is. As she stood
to leave, something caught her eye. Hesitantly, she turned.
Lightning lit up the water, and as it did so,
she could see something in the distance. It was only a brief flash of light,
but she thought she saw something protruding from the water, disappearing fast.
But then it was gone, and Rosie found herself
wondering if she was hallucinating. She stood still a few moments, the rain
matting her red hair on her face. Hesitantly, she reached for the book she had
been reading--an old paperback copy of Anne Rice's "Interview with the
Vampire." Rosie rather liked Rice's vampires. She found them to be even
sadder creatures than herself, and there was a strange comfort in that.
But the book was ruined, the ink on the pages
smearing together. Hesitantly, she left the old paperback on the beach to be
washed away by the morning tide.
She left it with the ghost of the Titanic.
It was a short walk home, but Rosie walked
slowly, loving the feel of the cool rain on her skin. She walked barefoot
through the white sand--now turned to mud from the downpour--and slid her
sandals on at the ramp leading to the road. She walked further down the beach
until she came across her family's beach house that opened onto the ocean.
By the time she reached the back entrance,
the rain was pelting her skin. She hurried inside, only to find her cousin Tori
sitting by the light of a single lamp. She looked up, her large eyes filled
with concern. "Where have you been? Are you okay?"
Rosie smiled sadly. "What are you doing
up? It's the middle of the night."
Tori sighed as she patted the spot next to
her on the couch. "You know I can't sleep during storms. Especially during
hurricane season at Florida."
Rosie laughed slightly. "Do you know
what tonight is?"
Tori shook her head.
"The anniversary of the Titanic."
"This is about those dreams you've been
having?"
Rosie sighed. "I can't get the Titanic
out of my head. Every time I close my eyes I see this girl--Rose. She looks
just like me and talks just like me...it's me...but it's not me..."
"Ro, I think you should lay off on the
crack."
Rosie's eyes glared daggers. "Ya know, I
really wish you would take me seriously. If I wanted to be belittled or taken
lightly I would go to Mom and Dad."
"Okay, okay, I'm sorry," Tori said,
patting her on the back. "I'll listen. Shoot."
Rosie took a deep breath to gather her
thoughts, her eyes focusing on the reproduction of Van Gogh's "Starry
Night" above the fireplace. The phrase "to the stars..." entered
her mind. It was her own voice, although she could not remember ever uttering
those words. They were words remembered as if from a dream or a distant
childhood memory. Something lost long ago, but she could not put a finger on
it.
"As you know, I've been having these
dreams quite regularly for the past few months. Each time I dream, a bigger
chapter of Rose's life is opened up to me, as if I were reading a novel from
the first person. Only...it's more than that. It's as if I AM Rose. I feel
everything that she feels and I know everything that she knows. She's afraid
and desperate...and when she goes on Titanic there's a young man she meets who
helps her. He has blond hair and blue eyes. I'm--Rose, I mean--is overwhelmed
with emotions when she thinks of him. It's almost like he was sent to help her.
I think he's an angel that her father sent to save her..."
"An angel?" Tori didn't know
whether to laugh or keep a straight face.
"Yes," Rosie snapped, exasperated.
"I--she is from a rich family, and her father died the year before. She
was going to jump off the back of the ship. She called out to her father and
told him she was coming to him, but just then, the young man showed up and
rescued me. Somehow, I knew my father had sent him..." Tears were welling
in her eyes as she said this.
This time, Tori did not laugh. She bit her
lip as she watched her cousin's eyes water with unexplained emotions.
"You're talking about Rose in first person," Tori said quietly.
"It wasn't you. Ro, I don't know what's going on with you, but I'm sure
there's a reasonable explanation. Let's see a doctor--"
"You mean a shrink?" Rosie asked.
Tori sighed, sitting back thoughtfully.
"Ro, I believe you. But other people might not. A doctor might be able to
help you understand what these dreams mean."
Rosie accepted that at the moment. Suddenly,
she was too tired to argue. Tori helped her walk to their bedroom. Rosie passed
her dresser, ignoring the stacks of books piled up on top. She had brought with
her Anne Rice, Edgar Alan Poe, and Shakespeare, of course--the three writers
she couldn't live without. She and Tori would walk on the beaches reading out
loud to each other from books of the three writers, and recite several of the
poems to each other loudly.
Tori wasn't quite as obsessed with it all as
Rosie was, but Tori was a good friend. She went along with it. Across the room,
Tori had put on her "Metallica S&M" chip in their small computer
console as Rosie flung her tired body down on the bed.
"How can you sleep with that
playing?" she muttered irritably, her voice muffled through the pillows.
But the pillows and soft blankets felt good under her tired body. She was
suddenly thankful that she had been motivated to change into dry clothes. No
sense in soaking the warm bed. As she closed her eyes, she could no longer feel
the bed beneath her body.
And Metallica was fading as well. She could
hear the chorus of "Enter Sandman" fade into the back of her mind as
her body drifted...drifted as on an ocean.
She was on the Titanic again, and it was
heading further into the endless sea--towards the awaiting iceberg. But
Rose--the sad rich girl--took no heed of the awaiting danger.
She was drifting down an eloquent flight of
stairs, head held high. She was wearing a gown just as gorgeous as the one she
had tried to jump off the ship in. But this one was burgundy, and she was
wearing long white gloves--it was a gown suited for royalty.
Jack waited for her at the foot of the
stairs. Yes, that was his name--Jack Dawson, the angel sent by her father. Once
again, she was struck by how dashingly handsome he looked. He was wearing a
borrowed tuxedo, his blond hair slicked back in the fashion of the period. But
always the most noticeable thing about him was his eyes--the way his gaze
burned into her heart and soul unflinchingly, without judgment. The way when he
looked at her like he was looking at her now, he saw nothing but her. Could
there possibly be so much passion in a single gaze?
She was eye level with him on the stairs now,
and his eyes remained transfixed on her. Tenderly, he took her hand and gave it
an elegant kiss. In that single moment of contact, Rose knew more passion and
intimacy than she'd ever known in her life. She had to take a deep breath to
keep from falling over.
But Jack's stoic expression soon turned into
a grin and she broke out into laughter. Together, they joined Mother and Cal at
dinner. Throughout dinner, Mother and Cal attempted to belittle Jack, but he
took it in stride. And Rose was proud of him. Throughout the course of the
meal, she threw him encouraging smiles and knowing looks. She thought that Cal
might've caught on to them, but she really didn't care.
After dinner, Jack took her down to steerage where
they danced all night. They sang loudly and danced together, holding one
another tightly. She did this with abandon for the first time in a long time.
For a single moment, Rose was at peace.
It was well past noon when Rosie awoke. The
sun was shining in on her through the open balcony, and a deliciously cool
breeze drifted in through the drawn draperies. The storm had passed.
Rosie sighed, turning over in bed. Below, she
could hear the sounds of the beach--the seagulls, the light waves washing in on
the white sands--all comforting sounds. And the air--she could smell the salt
in the air. Rosie felt content. Flashes of the dream entered her mind--Jack's
eyes, his warm breath, and strong hands. Jack, the wanderer. Jack, the artist.
Jack, the angel.
Rosie laughed at herself. "Careful,
Ro--you're falling in love with a figment of your imagination."
But as she stood up and walked to the
balcony, she knew he was more than that. Somehow, she could feel Jack, and she
knew that he existed in some form or another. She could even smell him--no
doubt residue left over from the recentness of her dream. She looked out over
the ocean.
Far down the beach, she could see glimpses of
umbrellas and people on towels. Not many people in the water. Still a bit cool
for swimming. Directly below, she could see Tori in the beach, wading in the
water near shore. She wore a bathing suit top and boxer shorts, and was sifting
through the sand. She was no doubt still on her daily seashell hunt. Usually,
Rosie and Tori were up around eight or nine to hunt for the shells, but
apparently Tori had decided to let her sleep in.
Good thing, too. She was exhausted from
staying up so late.
Looking up, Tori noticed Ro for the first
time. She waved excitedly, gesturing to her to join her. Rosie complied,
pulling on one of her many two-piece swimsuits and the usual boxers. And don't
forget your hat and sunglasses. It was particularly bright today.
She went downstairs and onto the back deck
that opened directly onto the beach. It was a beautiful day, and the wind was
blowing just enough to keep it cool. As she walked towards Tori, she tied her
long red hair back off her neck. She was considering cutting it before summer,
but Tori insisted that her hair was way too beautiful to cut.
"Look what I found," Tori said as
she approached her. In her hand, Tori held the battered and soaked
"Interview with the Vampire." Some of the pages were torn out.
Rosie shrugged nonchalantly. "I have a
hardback autographed copy at home. Besides, I think Louis would have wanted it
this way."
Tori looked at her strangely, but she
understood the reference. Louis was the main character in the book--the
aforementioned vampire being interviewed. He was a tragic creature who was
given immortality, yet all he wanted was for it to end. But the sad thing was
that he didn't have the courage to end it himself. That's why Rosie loved the
book so much. Sometimes she felt she identified with Louis. Sometimes she
thought of Louis as her dark lover; her dark angel.
But I've found a new angel, haven't I?
"Find any shells?" Rosie asked in
an effort to change the subject.
She shook her head distractedly. "Nope.
None worth mentioning. I'm starving. Wanna go for some pizza?"
Together they headed for their favorite pizza
pub. It was one of those places among the sidewalk souvenir shops that allow
people to come in right off the beach. It was a really relaxed atmosphere, with
good food, and on Friday and Saturday nights, they had live bands. Rosie's
band--Sword of Kahless--had played there several times.
Rosie was the only female player in Sword of
Kahless, but she was one of the best young guitarists around, and the guys
respected her. They said she had balls.
And it was true, figuratively speaking. The
other band members were her friends, and she had arranged the whole thing.
Jace, the resident Trekkie and lead singer, had picked out the name. Ro rather
liked it. It had sort of a rough edge. You can only guess the sort of music the
band produced. In terms of music from the late twentieth/early twenty-first
centuries, think Nine Inch Nails meets Metallica meets Ramstein meets Garbage.
And well...you get the idea.
Ro loved to play, but she mostly did it to
shock her parents.
"So when are your parents coming down
from New York?" Tori asked over a slice of pepperoni.
Rosie took a big gulp of Coca-Cola before
answering. "Next week, I think. That's what their latest e-mail told
me."
Rosie and Tori had spent the school year in
Florida after living in New York for most of their lives. The two girls had
been raised as sisters after Tori's parents died in a plane crash eight years
before. Tori's father had been Rosie's uncle on her father's side. Last year,
they moved to Florida per their own request.
But Rosie's father's business was in New
York, so her parents were constantly flying back and forth between New York and
Florida. Most of the time they were on their own, but they knew that her
parents had paid the neighbors to keep an eye on them.
"When we turn eighteen," Tori
suddenly said, "let's go get tattoos."
Ro laughed at the idea. "You know I'm
scared to death of needles."
They were silent for a few moments as they
finished their meal. Tori studied her thoughtfully. "You seem to be in a
much better mood," she observed.
Ro shrugged, a lopsided grin on her lips.
"You dreamed again last night, didn't
you? About him."
"His name is Jack," Rosie said
softly. "Jack Dawson."
"Jack," Tori repeated. "There
have to be a million Jack Dawsons in the history of the world." She was
quiet for a moment. "Hey, are you in the mood for a trip to the
library?"
"Library?" she asked. What on earth
could she be talking about? The school year was almost out and they had no
papers to work on. And even if they did, her computer at the beach house
practically was one big library, filled with resources a-plenty.
"I have an idea."
Fifteen minutes later, they were at the
public library. The library consisted mostly of computer chips that you plug
into a data pad or computer terminal, but it still carried some paper books,
although they were becoming a rarity.
"Tori, what are we doing here?" she
asked, automatically keeping her voice down.
"We're here to research the
Titanic."
"You know perfectly well that I have
tons of books and computer chips about the Titanic at home."
"Yes, but we need to look at old
newspapers. I believe that microfiche is this way." Tori led her through
stacks of organized computer chips and data pads, as well as old-fashioned
computer terminals. She led her past rows of ancient leather-bound books and
cheaply made paper books with yellowing pages. Jesus, did they actually check
those out to people?
Ro knew that most books had been translated
onto computer chips, but some people still preferred paper books with
leather-bound covers. Ro herself owned several of these.
They entered the elevator and went up.
"I still don't understand what we're doing here," she muttered.
"Tell me more about your dreams. The
girl you dream about. Do you know her last name?"
Rose thought about it as the lift opened and
the girls stepped out onto the second story. They had found the old microfiche
machines. "No, I don't think I know her last name."
"What about the other man? The one you
said was Rose's fiancé."
"Oh, Cal is so arrogant. I don't
understand why he insists on bringing jewels to cheer me up. Mother says he
only wants to make me happy, but I think Mother only wants to make herself
happy--"
Ro stopped when she realized that Tori was
staring at her in stupefied horror. Realizing what she had just said, she
turned beet-red. "I...I don't know where that came from," Ro
stammered. "I just opened my mouth and it came out. It's almost
like--"
"Like you're becoming Rose?" she
asked. There was no condescension in her voice.
Rosie nodded slowly, taking a deep breath.
"I think that...that these dreams are taking over. I'm starting to
remember everything Rose knew. I think I might be becoming her."
"Ro, you don't know if this
girl--whoever she was--even existed."
Rosie wanted to argue--to say that she knew
that Rose existed. "We'll find out soon enough," was what she said
instead.
As it turned out, the library had old
newspapers in its memory dating all the way back to the 1850's, and finding
articles about Titanic wasn't difficult at all. She had been headline news even
before she sank to her watery grave. On the date of April 15, 1912, newspapers
across the world screamed the bold headlines: "TITANIC SINKS, 1500
DEAD."
Chills raced through Ro's body as she stared
at the old print on the cold computer screen. "Ro, what was Cal's last
name?" Tori asked, tearing her attention away from the screen.
"I'm not sure. Let me think of all the
rich people who were on Titanic. There was Isador Straus, Benjamin Guggenheim,
J. J. Astor, something Hockley, let me look up a list..."
Picking up a nearby data pad, Ro hooked it
into the central library computer and called up a list of first class male
passengers. And there it was in black and white letters--the name Caledon
Hockley. "That's him," she whispered under her breath. "I was
going to marry him."
But I didn't. And the list listed him as a
survivor. Did that mean Rose died on the ship?
"Tori, run a search for any article
related to Caledon Hockley." After only minutes, they were staring at
another article about the Titanic. This one was dated a week after the sinking,
and the title read: "HEIR TO MULTI-MILLION FORTUNE LOSES FIANCEE."
They scanned the page, reading the article
silently. "Caledon Hockley, son of Nathan Hockley, owner of Hockley
Pittsburgh Steel lost his fiancée in the tragic sinking of Titanic. Rose DeWitt
Bukater of Philadelphia, age 17, was to marry Hockley two weeks after sailing
on the ship. 'She will live on in our hearts,' says Hockley of his loving fiancée.
Her mother, Ruth DeWitt Bukater, is reportedly too grief-stricken over the loss
of her daughter to make any comment. A memorial service for young DeWitt
Bukater is to be held in the DeWitt Bukater family cemetery next Wednesday,
where a headstone will be erected next to her father's grave. May the Hockley
family and the DeWitt Bukater family see it through this tragedy."
Ro stopped. She could read no more. She
thought her heard would pound out of her chest as she stared at the photos next
to the article. One picture was that of a group of people with forced smiles plastered
on their faces, standing in front of what was obviously the Titanic. There was
a handsome man with a traveling coat and hat, and his arm was intertwined with
that of a young lady in a big, bowed hat. She was wearing a fashionable
traveling dress, and her hat shadowed her face. But beneath the hat, juts of
curly hair stuck out, free from the pins that bound them to her head. And next
to her was a fortyish woman, with the same curly hair. While the young woman
had a sense of sadness behind her forced smile, the older woman had a certain
coldness in her eyes. Ro shivered. "Mother...Cal..." she whispered,
touching the screen gently.
But this wasn't the picture that caught their
attention. There was another picture of the girl by herself. It was a close-up
shot, and the curly hair was loose about her shoulders, with the front pulled
back in lovely butterfly combs. She wore a pretty but practical daytime dress
of the Edwardian era, and just the barest bit of color was visible in her
porcelain, upper-class cheeks. And her eyes held that same sadness--that hidden
desperation.
"Ro..." Tori's strangled cry
brought her back to reality. "The girl...it...it's you."
Rosie couldn't breathe. She thought she was
going to pass out. How could this be happening? But there was no mistaking it.
It was her. The girl in the picture was her.
"But how?" Tori asked.
All Ro could do was shake her head. She
didn't understand it anymore than Tori did. "This means I died on
Titanic," Ro whispered. Yet...she was here in 2014.
What had happened? Her mind went back to
Jack. She could hear his voice as if it had been yesterday. It had something to
do with Jack. She was still here because something was left undone.
What, Jack? I don't understand. I just want
to be with you.
But no answer came to her. This was something
she would have to figure out on her own. "Titan," she said aloud.
"What?" Tori asked.
"I have to sail on the Titan when she
launches next year. If I can try to relive everything...maybe I can figure out
what went wrong. Maybe I can figure out why I'm not with Jack."
That night, her sweet dreams of being with
Jack turned into nightmares. There were people screaming and people dying;
people freezing to death. She could hear a child crying somewhere, and a baby
screaming. Such horrid sounds to hear in the middle of the North Atlantic. The
sounds of death and pain. It made everything else in the world seem so
inconsequential; so petty.
At the center of it all, though, there was
Jack. Jack, the focus of her world. When the ship docks, I'm getting off with
you.
But why didn't I, Jack? Did I die? Did you
die?
Why weren't we reunited in heaven? Why am I
still trapped on this mortal coil after so many years?
Her sleep-hazed mind thought of Louis and his
eternal suffering. Louis, who lived year after year while those he loved grew
old and withered like flowers.
Oh, God, is it happening to me? Help me,
Jack! I'm so cold...
The End.