HERE AND NOW
Chapter Four

As she always did, Rose had kept true to her word about not telling anyone of Jack’s suicide attempt. She hadn’t even told Mandy, and she usually told her everything. But Rose knew that, despite her friend’s good intentions, Mandy was a terrible gossip and would never be able to keep such a secret to herself. So, Rose hadn’t told her, and didn’t plan on doing so. She felt bad. She hated hiding things from anyone, but she knew it was vital not to betray someone else’s trust, and with Jack being so famous, Rose telling anyone even a hint of what had happened the previous night could be very dangerous for him.

Rose found it strange, being so concerned and protective over someone who, not even twenty-four hours ago, she couldn’t stand the thought of. She supposed it was just who she was. She had always been naturally caring and unable to just walk away if she saw someone in trouble. Even when she had been living in foster homes, she had always been the one that the younger children had come to whenever they were upset or scared, and Rose had always wondered why.

That morning, following her and Jack’s little drama on the stern the night before, Rose had been awake for a few hours when Jack came to see her. She’d had breakfast already in the Café Parisien and had gone back to her room to go online and check her Hotmail email account. She was in the middle of typing a reply to her Japanese email pal when there was a knock at the door…since Mandy had already gone off exploring on her own, Rose was the only one there and she was grateful for that when she opened the door and saw Jack there. If Rose had received a visit from a DeWitt-Bukater while Mandy had been present, her friend would’ve no doubt twigged that something was going on.

"Jack." Rose hadn’t expected to see him again so soon. She was surprised he’d come to her at all, but she was pleased that he had.

"Hi…Rose, wasn’t it?" Jack asked. He was standing in the hallway outside her room, dressed casually in jeans and a white shirt…a baseball cap was on his head and he wore dark shades. Rose supposed he was trying to make it so that nobody would notice him. He looked rather silly in the baseball cap, but she didn’t comment.

"Hi. It’s nice to see you," Rose said honestly. "How are you feeling?"

"Not so hot," he said. "But better. And I think you’ve got a fair bit to do with that. I just wanted to stop by and thank you."

"Do you want to come in? My friend isn’t here right now, so we don’t have to worry about anything…" Rose opened the door wider.

"Actually, I came to see if you wanted to go for a walk on deck with me? I figured it wouldn’t hurt if we got to know each other better. We’ve got almost a week at sea…maybe we’ll get to be friends?"

"That would be nice. Okay. I’ll get a cardigan." Rose went and got her sweater and then left the room, closing the door behind her and walking through the corridors with Jack.

"So, I hear you and your family came to England just so you could sail back home on the Titanic," Rose said, trying to make conversation "Is that true?"

Jack laughed. It was slightly mocking, but sounded nice to Rose’s ears, especially as she knew that had she not come across him last night, he probably wouldn’t even be here at this moment, let alone laughing. "Yeah, my Dad’s a bit crazy like that. Anything comes along that’s popular and exclusive; we have to be in on it. I didn’t really want to come. I don’t like boats much and it all just seems kind of pointless."

"But it is a beautiful ship," Rose said.

"I guess I can’t argue with that," Jack half-heartedly agreed "But I don’t think its worth all the hype…and I don’t care what anyone says. I don’t think it’s unsinkable, either."

"I have to agree there. I don’t think any ship can be unsinkable. Even one as big and nice as this," Rose said before changing the subject. She wanted to get to know more about Jack. "So, I met one of your sisters, sort of. Parker, it was…she apologized to me yesterday after you knocked me over."

"God, I’m sorry about that," Jack apologized, looking embarrassed "I was…er…in a bit of a mess…as you later found out. I didn’t hurt you, did I?"

"No. I was just thinking that Parker seems a bit different from the rest of you. More…outspoken," Rose said.

"She’s fiery. Has one hell of a temper. She hates the press, but you’d know that…they like to try and get her worked up. It’s annoying. She almost got sued last year for breaking a photographer’s camera," Jack said. "But we get along good. We’re pretty close. Do you have any siblings?"

They had reached the decks now and found a pair of deckchairs to sit in. Rose was amused when she saw a woman with her afghan hound and poodle walk past. The poodle looked like it was wearing a cashmere doggie-sweater, and Rose couldn’t help but feel sorry for the poor, silly-looking thing. She hated it when people dressed up their pets like humans.

"Actually, I don’t have any siblings. I don’t have any family even, for that matter…I’m an orphan."

"Oh. I’m sorry."

"Me, too…my parents died when I was ten. They were killed in a plane crash. The authorities wanted me to live with my Aunt Jessica. She’s my mother’s sister, but Jessica didn’t want me, and so I was put in a care home," Rose explained.

"I can’t imagine what that must’ve been like." Jack looked at her sympathetically and Rose blushed. She’d never liked sympathy.

"Well, it’s in the past. I just finished college last year, got my performing arts degree. Hopefully soon I’ll actually be able to do something with it," Rose said.

"You like acting?"

"When I was a little girl, I seriously wanted to be Shirley Temple." Rose grinned. "These days I’m looking to be the next Michelle Pfeiffer."

"Well, here’s to it happening. I’m sure you’ve got more talent than most actresses today…I mean, if people like Mariah Carey can be in a movie…I’m sure there’s hope for someone with actual, genuine talent."

"You haven’t even seen me act."

"Well, if you got a degree, that has to mean something. And trust me about Mariah. I saw Glitter."

They both laughed.

For the next hour, they talked about normal, everyday things. Favorite movies, favorite singers and bands…Rose discovered that Jack loved old school film noir and that his favorites were White Heat and The Maltese Falcon and he found out that she loved classic movies, too, and her favorite movie of all time was Gone With The Wind. He liked Eminem and Maroon 5. She liked Evanescence, Pink, Avril Lavigne, and Bon Jovi. Jack told Rose that Avril was good friends with Parker and that he could get Rose some tickets to her next concert and even backstage passes. Rose happily accepted. Jack liked hanging out in bars. Rose loved theater. Jack was a huge basketball fan. Rose liked animals; Jack was allergic to dog fur. They learned a good deal about each other’s likes and dislikes in that hour, but Rose still didn’t find out anything really personal about Jack. He didn’t seem as into opening up as she was. She decided not to push him; he’d tell her when he wanted to, if he ever did.

"So, do you wanna go clubbing tonight? This boat’s got a few clubs on it. Might as well check them out…" Jack said casually.

Rose felt her stomach knot. Was Jack DeWitt-Bukater asking her on a date? It sure sounded like it. Still, she tried to be cool. Didn’t want to seem like a silly, overexcited, desperate fan girl or anything. "Sure. Why not? I think I’m free…"

Jack caught onto her game and grinned. "Think you’re free? Maybe you’d better check your diary if you aren’t sure…"

Rose laughed. "No, I am free. I’d like to go."

"Good," said Jack. They smiled at each other.

"There you are, Jack." A new voice joined them, and Rose saw George DeWitt-Bukater standing there, looking displeased. His wife, Ruth, was with him, and a bodyguard walked around in the distance.

Jack’s whole attitude changed at the arrival of his parents. He removed his baseball cap from his head and took off the shades. "Yeah. Sorry, Father. Did you need me for something?"

"We’re having dinner with the Duff-Gordons tonight. Make sure you’re there."

Rose felt her heart sink. She knew what this meant and, confirming it, Jack looked at her. "Rose, I’m sorry…I didn’t know…"

"It’s okay. Maybe another time."

"Yeah…" Jack frowned. "Well, bye."

Rose couldn’t help feeling disappointed as Jack walked away.

*****

Jack fought the urge to slam his door as he entered his bedroom, but it was exceedingly difficult. He settled for throwing himself down on the bed and groaning loudly, putting his head in his hands. He’d always been a bit dramatic.

"Jack? You in there?"

He actually felt relieved when he heard Parker knock on his door and call for him. Good. Someone to talk to. He and Parker were close. He could tell her anything and know that she wouldn’t rat him out to anyone.

"Hey, Parker. Come in," he invited, and she entered and sat down next to him on the bed.

"What’s up?" she asked, sisterly instincts telling her something was wrong.

"How long have you got?" Jack asked. Then he sighed. "K. See, I met this girl…"

"Oh. Who? How?"

"I was just getting to that. I met her last night when I was on deck…uh…getting some air. Her name’s Rose Dawson…and I think I like her."

"Rose Dawson? Name doesn’t ring any bells…" said Parker.

"It won’t, she isn’t from our circles…look, don’t tell anyone about this, okay? You know what Mom and Dad are like."

"Your secret’s safe with me," grinned Parker before lightly punching Jack on the arm.

"Good. Now, get out. I’ve gotta change for dinner." Jack grimaced as Parker left. The idea of dining with the Duff-Gordons was something that made him want to go get his father’s pistol again. He felt awful for blowing off his plans with Rose like he had, but it wasn’t like he had a say in the matter. Whenever his father wanted something, it had to be done. The Duff-Gordons were very good friends with the DeWitt-Bukaters but usually they just dined with George and Ruth. Tonight, they were in for a treat, for they had only ever dined with the whole DeWitt-Bukater family once, and that had been years ago. Jack knew that there were no two ways about it–he was attending that dinner, like it or not. But that didn’t mean he couldn’t be miserable about it, and he ranted to himself as he dressed, hating his life once again.

*****

Rose was up early the next day, and after breakfast, she went wandering around the shops that were on the ship. There weren’t many, and most of them sold gifts, but she did find a few that had clothes, and one that had a small section of evening wear. As she browsed, she found a beautiful green cocktail dress that she knew would be perfect, but when she saw the price tag of three hundred dollars, and that the matching shoes were another eighty-five dollars, she realized that it would take a huge chunk of her savings that she would really need in America, and sighed.

"Oh, that’s nice," said a voice, causing Rose to jump. She’d been lost in a daydream as she held the dress up, looking at it in the mirror wistfully. As she came back to her senses, she saw Molly Brown reflected in the glass and turned around.

Rose had to agree. It was a lovely dress; elegant without being overdone. It was simple yet effective; she knew it would look great on her. Green suited her so well, complimenting her eyes and red hair. Rose had always liked the color, especially mint green, which this dress was.

"I really like it," agreed Rose "But unfortunately, my budget doesn’t."

"But you’ve gotta have it. It’ll look great on you. At least try it on," insisted Molly.

"I guess that wouldn’t hurt…" Rose decided, and she called a sales person over, who showed her to the little dressing room. Inside, Rose stripped out of the jeans and tank top she’d been wearing and put on the dress and a pair of green shoes she’d found to go with it. As soon as it was over her head, she felt like a princess; she’d never worn a more glamorous, beautiful outfit, and her heart sank, knowing that she just couldn’t buy it. Still, she left the dressing room to check herself in the mirror, and Molly looked impressed at seeing her.

"I knew you’d look beautiful in it. Did you want it for the dinner on Sunday?"

"Yeah, but I just can’t afford it. I guess I’ll just have to go in one of the outfits I already have, but I fear I’d be horribly underdressed again," Rose said with a sigh.

"Underdressed for dinner at the captain’s table? We can’t have that…" said Molly. "I know how we can solve this. I’m going to give you a loan."

"What? Oh, no, you couldn’t. No. There’s no way I could take money from someone I don’t even know…" Rose began. She hated taking money from people. It always made her feel like she owed something or was leeching, and she’d always been independent. It wasn’t that she didn’t appreciate Molly’s offer. She was incredibly touched by it, but she didn’t know Molly, not like if it had been say, an aunt or close family friend offering instead. It would be wrong to take money from her, millionaire or not.

"Look, kid…Rose, isn’t it? I’ve been where you are, and it ain’t fun…I can see how much you genuinely want and need that outfit, and I can afford to help you, so why not? Call it a loan, and you can pay me back when you’re settled if it means that much to you."

"Mrs. Brown, it isn’t that I don’t appreciate the offer. It’s so kind of you, but…"

Before Rose could finish, Molly had taken her credit card out of her purse and had called the salesperson back over.

"Excuse me. We would like to purchase this dress and these shoes," she said, an air about her now that Rose hadn’t seen her use before. Rose guessed it was just show for the store staff; it helped if one behaved somewhat haughtily in places like this, Rose knew.

"Certainly, Ma’am." The cashier treated Molly and Rose as though they were royalty, and Rose was charmed to see that the store threw in a free gift of a pretty, silver-plated bracelet with every purchase over two hundred dollars. Despite still feeling uncomfortable with the loan, Rose couldn’t help feeling good as she walked out of the store with a big designer shopping bag in her hand.

"Mrs. Brown, I really don’t know how to thank you. I think you’ve quite possibly saved my life." Rose laughed.

"Well, for starters, call me Molly," Molly said, and it was clear then that the middle-aged woman had taken quite a shine to Rose, already acting as though they were old, dear friends. Rose was touched.

"I’ll pay you back the minute I get a job in America," Rose promised, knowing that she would be true to her word. No matter how rich Molly Brown might be, Rose felt like paying her back was the only option. It was, to her, the right thing to do. She smiled. "Thank you. Now I’ll not only meet the required dress code, but I’ll look more glamorous than I ever have."

"You’ll knock ‘em dead, is what you’ll do. And don’t worry about the dinner…I’ll have it arranged so you can sit by me. I wouldn’t want a doll like you anywhere near those DeWitt-Bukater vultures," said Molly as they walked through the corridors of the ship, passing the row of little stores.

Rose remembered, then, that she would be dining with Jack, and could feel her heart flutter a little. She wished she could tell Molly that not all the DeWitt-Bukaters were bad, but she couldn’t risk Jack’s secret, so she kept silent, hoping that Jack would be as nice to her at the dinner as he had been since she’d saved his life. She was still disappointed that they hadn’t been able to go clubbing together the night before, and wondered how his dining experience with the Duff-Gordons has gone. Like Molly Brown, the Duff-Gordons were famous; Lucile designed saucy lingerie and her line was extremely popular with people like Posey DeWitt-Bukater, and her husband, Sir Cosmo, was a ridiculously successful businessman. They were just as wealthy as the DeWitt-Bukaters, maybe moreso, and Rose realized that they, too, would probably be dining at the captain’s table that Sunday night. Even with Molly Brown guiding her, this dinner, Rose knew, was going to be one of the most intimidating experiences of her life.

Chapter Five
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