JUST WHEN I NEEDED YOU
Chapter Nine
Rose finished putting on her eyeliner when
she heard Jack's car pull up in the driveway. Giving herself the once over, she
went downstairs to greet him. He had called from work earlier, to tell her they
were going out for a fancy dinner and she should dress up. For Rose, it was the
perfect opportunity to tell him about the baby.
*****
Jack sighed; his emotions were so out of
whack tonight. His boss, though normally very patient, had been breathing down
his back today when he noticed Jack wasn't working at his usual pace. Very far
from it, in actuality. His mind had been wrapped up in wonder about Rose. When
he had called to tell her about dinner, she said she had something to talk to
him about. Something important, she had said. What worried him was the
way she had said it. Fear was the major tone, with a dash of worry and anger.
Did she somehow find out about what happened in Arizona? Jack shrugged that
image away as he unlocked the door. There was no way she could've found out about
that.
Opening the door, he was surprised to see
Rose waiting for him, dressed to the nines. He gave her a weak smile. "Hey
you. Something wrong?" he asked, brushing his lips against her cheek.
Rose pulled back slightly and returned the
smile. "No, everything's fine. I just missed you today, that's all."
Jack let out a sigh of relief. She hadn't
found out. He knew that if she agreed to marry him tonight, he'd have to tell
her. But that was to be determined. "I missed you, too. I'll go get
cleaned up and we'll go. Our reservations are for six."
Rose nodded and followed him upstairs,
stopping him before he went into the bathroom.
"What's wrong Rosie?" Jack asked,
his face creased in worry.
Rose shook her head and lifted her gaze to
meet his. "Nothing. It's just, I..." She paused, smiling slightly.
"I love you, Jack," she finished lamely.
Jack stared at her for a moment. That
obviously wasn't what she had intended on saying, but with everything that the
night was riding on, he wasn't about to push it. "I love you, too, Rose.
I'm going to get ready now, okay?"
Rose nodded, standing on her toes to kiss him
lightly. "I'll be downstairs."
Jack watched as she left the room. There was
definitely something going on, that much was for sure. There had never been so
much tension between them, even after spending three years apart. Shaking his
head, he went into the bathroom to shower.
*****
Rose stared out the bay window in the front
of the house. She felt horrible for keeping this from Jack, but so far, no time
had seemed right. She had to tell him tonight, there was no way around it. Jack
already suspected something was up, she could see it in his eyes. As she
absentmindedly stroked her middle, she realized there was something else in his
eyes. Something Rose had never seen in the eighteen years that she had known
him. Nervousness? No, not Jack. There wasn't a nervous bone in his body. Rose
pushed a curl out of her face and sat down on a nearby chair. As well as she
knew Jack, she had no idea how he would take this news. Would he react with his
usual whooping and cheering, ready to accept the challenge of fatherhood, or
would he shrink away, like he had when his parents died, leaving her once
again? What if it was the latter? What would she do? Sighing, she went into the
kitchen to check the time.
*****
Jack changed into his dress pants and went
downstairs to meet Rose. He found her in the kitchen, staring out the window
above the sink.
"Ready to go?"
Rose jumped and turned around. "God
Jack, you scared me," she said, almost immediately regretting how she said
it. She hadn't meant to sound so bitchy.
"Sorry," Jack muttered, grabbing
his keys off the table.
"This isn't how the night is supposed to
start," Jack thought as they got into the car, the air painfully silent.
*****
Rose glanced over at Jack, whose face was set
at a grim line, his eyes never leaving the road and his hands tightly clutching
the steering wheel.
What's going on with us? Rose wondered as she watched the outside world whiz
by.
After a few more minutes of intolerable
silence passed, Rose turned to face Jack. "Listen, Jack...whatever I did
to make things weird between us, I'm sorry. I don't want the night to be
ruined."
Jack glanced at her, his heart lurching at
the sight of tears forming in the corner of her eyes. "It's not your
fault, Rose. My mind's just elsewhere tonight. I'm sorry. Let's try to have a
good time from now on, okay?" he said, giving her the first genuine smile
between them so far.
Rose smiled back. "Okay. How was
work?"
"Not bad. Ed was on my case for not
getting as much as he'd like done, but I figure I can catch up on all that this
weekend. How was your day?"
"Fine, I guess. I spent most of the day
at the Boutique. Gina and I did lunch. Her and Greg are so excited about going
to Paris."
Jack took note of the wishful look on her
face, knowing full well that she'd always wanted to go there. If things went as
planned, she might be going there sooner then she thought. "Yeah I know. I
ran into Greg during my lunch break. He's just as excited as Gina."
Rose smiled and leaned back in her seat.
"Wouldn't it be great to go there? Stroll along the French countryside.
Visit the Eiffel Tower, have our picture drawn by a sidewalk artist. Have lunch
at one of them little French cafes." She sighed. "Maybe
someday."
Jack grinned at her. "We'll go there one
day, Rosie. I promise."
Rose just sighed again as they pulled into
the parking lot.
*****
Once they were seated, Jack took hold of
Rose's hand. "I can't believe I haven't told you how beautiful you look
tonight. If I didn't know better, I'd have to say you're an angel sent from
above."
Rose giggled softly. "I bet you say that
to all the girls."
Jack's face turned serious. "There are
no other girls for me, Rosie. Just you."
"And you for me."
Jack leaned over and kissed her softly.
"I love you so much, Rose."
"I love you, too, Jack," she
replied gently, squeezing his hand.
At that moment, when their eyes met, the rest
of the world disappeared. Time held no meaning. It was just them. Suddenly, a
waiter appeared at their table, bringing them both back to reality.
"May I take your order?"
Rose smiled and gave the man her order and
Jack followed suit. Once he was gone, they turned their attention back to one
another.
"After dinner, I was thinking we could
go for a stroll down by the lake. There's something I need to talk to you
about," Jack said, his eyes sparkling mischievously.
Rose's mouth curled up into an amused grin.
"You're up to something."
Jack feigned innocence. "Me? Come on,
give me a little credit here."
Rose rolled her eyes. "What is it?"
Jack shook his head. "No, no. You're
going to have to wait. I think you'll like it, though." At least I hope
so, his mind screamed.
"All right, then."
Jack grinned. "Didn't you say you had
something to talk to me about?" he asked.
But instead of her brightening up and
chatting away about what she had on her mind, like she normally did, they fell
back into an unsettling silence.
"Rose?" Jack prodded, after a few
minutes.
Rose looked up at him. "Ah, yes. I do.
But that can wait until later. Let's just enjoy dinner, okay?"
Jack nodded and they promptly changed the
subject.
*****
"Come on, Rose," Jack called
impatiently.
They had arrived at the lake, after dinner,
which had gone smoothly after the last moment of silence. Jack was feeling much
more confident about proposing, but was tired of waiting.
"I'm coming. My stupid shoes keep
getting caught in the ground," Rose complained, as she caught up to him.
"Well, I know how to fix that,"
Jack announced, throwing the blanket he was carrying over his shoulder and
scooping Rose up. She squealed in protest at first, but allowed him to carry
her to his destination.
They came to a stop on the beach, a few feet
away from the water. Rose recognized the spot immediately; that's where their
first kiss had taken place. Rose eyed Jack suspiciously as he spread the
blanket out and helped her sit down. "All right, Dawson. What's this all
about?" Rose asked.
Jack looked up at her, the serious look in
his eyes sobering her instantly. "Rose," Jack started, taking her
hand into his, "don't say anything, okay? Let me get this out."
Rose nodded and Jack took a deep breath. This
was it, the moment of truth. His life was about to change. "Rose, I love
you. I've always loved you, even though I don't think I realized it half the
time. The three years we spent apart were complete hell. I never want to be
apart from you again. Never. You're my whole life. You're all I have in the
world. I..." He gulped. "I guess what I'm trying to say is...Rose,
will you marry me?" Jack sat still, trying to gauge her reaction. What he
didn't expect was exactly what happened. Rose promptly broke down into tears.
"Rose? Honey, please don't cry."
Rose glanced up at him, a smile forming
behind her tears. He was so worried. Hell, he probably thought she didn't want
to marry him. "I'm sorry, Jack. I just wasn't expecting this..." Rose
said, her voice trailing off.
Jack smiled slightly. "Well, what do you
say?"
Rose threw her arms around him, whispering
yes before their lips met. When they parted, Jack pulled the ring box out and
took her hand. Sliding it onto her finger, he grinned. "I told you that
first day, if you walked down the aisle to anyone, it would be me."
Rose smiled. "I love you, Jack."
"I love you, too."
They embraced again, but Rose pulled away,
remembering she had something to share with him as well. "Um. Jack, there
is one more thing we need to talk about."
Jack nodded and slid an arm around her.
"Go on."
Rose swallowed hard and met his gaze head on.
"Well, when you said that I was all you have in the world, you were wrong.
You have one other person and me. Or at least you will in another eight
months."
Jack's eyes widened. "Y-you...you're...I
mean, what?" he stammered.
Rose bit her lip to keep from laughing.
"Yeah."
"How? When? Wow."
Rose grinned. "I'm pretty sure you can
figure out how. As for when it happened, I think it was the night or shortly
after I moved in."
Slowly but surely, a huge grin spread across
Jack's face. "I'm going to be a dad?"
Rose nodded and screamed when Jack pulled her
up and started dancing her around the beach. "I'm going to be a dad!"
he yelled into the night. "Yahoo!"
Unable to contain it any longer, Rose
collapsed into a fit of laughter and Jack soon joined her. This was definitely
a new beginning.
*****
Rose sighed happily as she lay in Jack's
arms, staring up at the star-lit sky. Her, Jack, and their baby. The perfect
family. Forever.
They had spent the better part of the past
two hours discussing things they would have to do and the amount of time they
needed to prepare. They'd even set a date--August fourteenth. It was a mere
month and a half away, but they were confident they could pull it off. Besides,
this way, they could have the summer wedding at the lake like they both wanted
and Rose wouldn't be obviously pregnant yet. Rose had put an end to Jack's
theory of waiting until the baby was born, saying it was bad enough it had been
conceived out of wedlock. She didn't want it to be born that way. The
conversation had come to an abrupt halt though, when Jack had pressed his lips
to hers. Now they were both lost in thought, although about two different
subjects.
*****
Jack's mind was at a raging war with his
heart. He knew he had to tell her about what happened. His head was screaming
it. But his heart was reminding him that if he did; he might very well lose
her. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, his mind won out.
"Rose," he said nervously, sitting
up.
"Hmm?" came her muffled reply.
Jack hesitated; the night was going so well.
There was a promise of ecstasy for later on in the air and he didn't want to
ruin it. On the other hand, she deserved to know. Deciding to tell her and
accept whatever happened afterward, he took her hand. The one now sporting the
diamond engagement ring, and looked her in the eye. Rose met his gaze and
shivered, recognizing the look. It was the same one he had had when he told her
he was leaving. Growing nervous, she absentmindedly played with their
intertwined fingers.
"Rose, look at me."
Rose lifted her eyes. Fear filled emerald
jewels mated with passion owned blue. Rose felt her heart drop. She wasn't
going to like this.
"Rose, there's something I need to talk
to you about. It's not pretty, I can promise you that. The only reason I'm
telling you this is because you agreed to be my wife and if we're going to get
married, we have to start with no secrets between us. There is a chance, a
pretty good one at that, that once I tell you, you're going to want to take
that ring off and throw it into the lake. If you do, I'll understand."
Rose eyes filled with tears, her mind racing
with ideas of what could be so horrible she wouldn't want to be with him
anymore. "Okay."
Jack sighed and looked at her. God, she was
so beautiful. He wanted to take her into his arms and make love to her all
night long, but he also knew that might never happen again. Closing his eyes,
he attempted to gather his thoughts. In the back of his mind he could still
hear the awful noises of that night. Screeching tires, metal bending, and glass
breaking. The screams, oh God, the screams. Shaking his head, he reminded himself
he had to keep composed as he told her. He might lose the love of his life
because of his own carelessness. "I lied to you, Rose."
Rose looked confused. "About what?"
"You remember how I said I kept our
promise?"
Rose nodded, and gasped as realization hit
her. "You mean...?"
Jack looked out at the lake and nodded.
"Yeah." He paused. "There's a lot more if you want me to keep
going."
"Go ahead."
Taking a deep breath, he returned his stare
to Rose. "After I left here, I just drove. I didn't know where I was going
or what I was going to do once I got there. I just had to get away from here.
So I drove. After a few days, I ended up in Arizona. I hadn't slept in days, my
clothes were a mess...I must've looked like I'd survived a train wreck.
Practically dying of sleep deprivation, I pulled into this little motel and
rented a room for a few days. My second day there, I met the daughter of the
owner. She was my age and we hit it off. I felt so comfortable around her, I
guess because she reminded me so much of you. After a day, I found myself
telling her about all that happened, about leaving you and the pain that came
with it. She was real sympathetic...nothing like the people here. Really
sincerely sympathetic. We came to form a great friendship. I stayed in
Arizona...got a place to live, went back to school...that's where I met
Fabrizio and Tommy. Anyway, that September, Meg and I had become inseparable,
much like we used to be. The following February, things started happening
between us, romantic stuff. I was so scared though, scared that I would lose
your memory. But I couldn't stop things. We became, uh...intimate that summer.
Then in November, we were at a party in the next town...I had a few drinks. I
shouldn't have been driving. On our way back, we hit a delivery truck. I never
even saw him coming." He paused. "Meg died almost instantly. I got by
with only a fractured wrist...I found out later that she had been three months
pregnant. I killed her and my baby. I was tried and convicted, but was released
that next October on bail...Fabri, Tommy, and I took off for Cali the next
day."
Rose sat, shocked. He had broken his promise
to her, but that was something she could forgive. She couldn't even imagine
going through what he had. Rose understood why he might think she'd be angry,
but learning what she just had made her love him even more.
"Rose? Please say something."
Rose's gaze shot back up to his concerned
face. He was clearly an emotional wreck. Instead of answering him, she kissed
him so passionately and so suddenly he fell onto his back, pulling her down
with him.
*****
Breaking away to look at Rose, Jack felt
tears course down his face. She didn't hate him! "Does that mean you still
wanna get married?"
Rose's eyes glittered with unshed tears.
"Yes, Jack. Nothing will change that. I love you."
With that said, they melted together,
physically proclaiming their love for each other.