TEARS IN HEAVEN
Chapter One
February 19, 2004
Rose stared out at the deep blue ocean, her
heart reeling. Why did everything have to remind her of Jack? The ocean...the
deep sea whose beauty was only comparable to...Jack's eyes. Those gorgeous blue
orbs which would never open again, never see the light of day. It had been six
months since she had lost him, lost him to the horrors of the war that was
still raging overseas. "The fight for freedom," Rose thought
sarcastically. "We're fighting for the freedom of the world, but Jack
never got to freely choose if he wanted to go." Rose shivered as the
February wind swirled around her, but was oblivious to the fact that she was.
Her whole world was cold. It would never be warm again. For the rest of her life,
she'd freeze, like she did in the bed she and Jack used to share, where she now
lay alone, shivering without his arms. Arms that would never again hold her
close. Arms that could never make the rest of the world disappear again. Rose
sighed and tipped the glass she was holding to the sky. "Happy Birthday,
Jack. I love you."
*****
"Mommy, smile!" almost two-year-old
Josh ordered when Rose came in the door, later that night.
Rose shook her head sadly. "Mommy
doesn't feel like smiling right now, sweetheart. What are you still doing up,
anyway?"
Josh gave her a dazzling smile. "Helga
let me watch atoons!"
Rose leaned over and picked her son up.
"She did, huh? You must've been a good boy for her, then."
"Helga say I was perfect angel!"
Rose couldn't help giggling slightly at his
announcements. She kissed him on the head. "You're always a perfect angel,
Josh. Where's Helga now?"
"In baby room."
"Okay. Lets go get your jammies on and
go see what she's doing in there. But then it's time for bed." Josh laid
his head on Rose's shoulder and casually popped his thumb in his mouth, his
eyes drooping. Rose carried him into his room and got his pajamas on without
much fuss for once. "You wanna go to sleep now, honey?" Josh nodded
sleepily, so Rose gave him a kiss and laid him in his crib. "Night Josh, I
love you."
"Wuv you, Mommy." Just as Rose was
about to leave the room, he cried out for her. "Mommy, Mommy!"
Rose rushed to his side. "Josh, what's
wrong?"
Josh looked up at her with tears in his big
blue eyes. "Mommy, make Daddy come home."
Not even bothering to try to not cry, Rose
picked him up and held him close. "I wish I could, sweetie. I wish I
could."
"Sleep with you," Josh whimpered.
Rose nodded and brushed away his tears.
"All right. You can sleep with me tonight."
*****
Once Josh was peacefully asleep in her bed,
Rose went down to the nursery where Helga was desperately trying to get a
stubborn Janelle to go to sleep. "Here, let me take her," Rose said,
coming into the room. Helga jumped slightly at her voice, but handed her the
baby, who promptly went to sleep in her mother's arms.
Helga shook her head as Rose lay the sleeping
infant in the crib. "I don't understand how you do that. She never wants
to sleep for me."
Rose smiled slightly, "A mother's touch,
I guess," she said, closing the door a little.
"You're back early tonight. You
okay?" Helga asked as they walked into the kitchen.
Rose sat down at the table while Helga poured
them both some coffee. "I guess I'm okay. I mean, I expected today to be
worse then it was, you know?"
Helga nodded. "It sounds like you're
starting to heal."
Rose sighed. "Maybe. It sure doesn't
feel like it, though. Everywhere I go, something reminds me of him and I end up
in tears. It still hurts so much, especially when I look at the kids. Josh only
has a vague recollection of him and the twins will never have the chance to
know their father. And they all look exactly like him!"
Helga patted Rose's hand. "I know, I
know. You know what they say though, time heals all wounds."
Rose dropped her head into her hands as
unshed tears began to spill out. "I think this wound is too deep for even
time to heal. It's so unfair! We'd only been married for two years! We wanted
to travel the world, see everything there is to see. Jack wanted a big family,
lots of children. We had three, two of which he'll never know."
Helga hugged Rose. "It'll get easier.
The pain won't ever go away, but it'll lessen. Just give it time."
*****
"Jack, you have to come home, we need
you!" Rose yelled from her side of the ocean. They were standing, able to
see each other, but an ocean and large amounts of land separated them.
"I'm coming, Rosie! I'm coming. Just
hold on!" Jack yelled back as he started to run towards her. But the more
he ran, the more space was put between them. He kept running until they could
only make out the faint outline of each other.
"Come home, Jack!" Rose shouted
again.
"I am! I love you!" he shouted,
when all of a sudden a bomb hit his side of the ocean, making the land sink
beneath the water...
*****
Rose sprung up in bed, gasping for air. A
dream. It was only a dream. "At least in my dream, he's still alive,"
Rose muttered, glancing down at Josh's sleeping form beside her. She quietly bent
down and kissed his forehead before laying back down and going to sleep.