THEN YOU LOOK AT ME
Chapter Five

Rose's Diary
June, 2000

Dear Diary,

Jack Dawson took me out on a date tonight. Oh my, it was the most magical date in the history of the world. We went to a movie, first of all, and even I, the Movie Freak, could not concentrate. I just kept thinking about Jack sitting right next to me. In the dark! I get chills just thinking about it. About halfway through the film Jack put his arm around me and I leaned against him. We sat like this for the majority of the time, just holding hands and cuddling. Then, after the movie, Jack asked if I would like to do something else. I said yes; I wasn't ready to go home! Jack suggested we go down by the river. And that's just what we did. Jack bought us ice cream cones. And we talked for a little bit. But then something happened, diary. And I don't know if I can put it into words. Jack and I kissed. But not just kissed...we KISSED! It was so sweet. Jack asked if he could kiss me. And after I said yes, he did. We kissed for a half-hour in that little park down by the river. The backdrop of downtown Spokane was behind us and somehow it made the whole thing more exciting. Once, in eighth grade, Liza and I were down there during Hoopfest and we saw a couple making out on the bank of the water. Liza has since then called the area "Makeout Beach." And now I can see that she is right. After a while, Jack remarked that he'd better get me home or else my Mother would get worried. I agreed and we started home. As he was dropping me off, Jack got out of the car and we kissed again on the front step, this time for ten minutes. I knew I should be getting inside, but I couldn't tear myself away. Jack is so wonderful and unimaginable. I can't believe I met him. He's nice, funny, sweet, handsome, smart, oh, I can't even name everything. Jack said he would call again tomorrow. Oh, I hope he does!

Dear Diary,

Jack called just a minute ago! He woke me up in fact, he he. It's only eight o'clock in the morning. Anyway, he said that he was going to church, since it is Sunday, but wanted to know if I wanted to take a drive with him afterward. I'll pick you up around twelve, he said. I, of course, agreed. Imagine, two dates with Jack in the same weekend! Oh God, what am I going to wear? I need to shower as well. Maybe Moll is home and she came come over and help me decide what to do.

Later

I just got back from being with Jack. He picked me up around twelve, just as he had said. Before that Mollie did come over and helped me decided what to wear and things like that. She said that since we were going for a drive that I shouldn't really dress up. I agreed. So I ended up wearing dark green cargo shorts and a white tank top. When Jack showed up he said I looked nice. I was happy, diary. We went for a 'drive' and ended up in Moses Lake, where we ate a late lunch (since both of us had eaten late breakfasts we weren't hungry until then.) It was so much fun getting out of town like that. Even for a few hours only. After lunch, Jack and I went down by the water and Jack pulled out his sketchbook. He showed me some of his drawings and I must say, they are wonderful. He can draw like any professional artist can; I was really impressed. As we were heading back to the car, Jack and I noticed the boats out on the water. Jack mentioned that it might be fun to go boating sometime and I was all for it. I haven't been boating much before, since my mother doesn't care for it. Speaking of Mother, she met Jack for the first time today. I think she likes him; they seemed to get along fine. But we will see. Anyway, we then started back from Moses Lake in Jack's Ford Explorer (which I love!) The whole hour and half drive was so much fun! Jack and I played all this wonderful music the whole way, blasting it and singing along until we reached Spokane. Then we stopped singing and turned down the music, he he. The best was when we played Alanis Morissette's "Ironic." We were in the middle of nowhere and no one was around. Jack and I sang the song at the top of our lungs and then broke down laughing afterward. It was so much fun! I am still giddy thinking about it. Rehearsals are tomorrow, which means I get to see Jack!

Dear Diary,

It is now Friday. The week is over and done with and I can look forward to the weekend. We had rehearsals all week, but they went well. The play looks like it is going to be wonderful. All of the cast members, assistant directors, and directors seem to be excited about the whole ordeal. Everyone shows up at the theater in a good mood and ready to perform. Jack called me just a few minutes ago. It has been so fun working with him. Gosh, I think he makes a good Romeo. No, a perfect Romeo. Anyway, Jack asked if I wanted to do the boating thing we talked about doing. 'Are you kidding?' I asked him. I have been looking forward to doing this all week. Apparently Jack's uncle has a boat that he is going to let Jack use so that he doesn't have to rent one. Jack was talking about going up on the Columbia River--but that is almost two hours away. We may just go to Moses Lake again or Sprague Lake, which is near there too. Jack promised to teach me how to fish. He he. I've hardly ever been fishing in my life. Except for the time when I was five and six and I went with my father. This is going to be so much fun! I am meeting Molly, Liza, and Sara (who is back in town now) at the movies in about an hour. They all want to hear about Jack.

Dear Diary of a Very Happy Rose DeWitt Bukater,

I just got back from my day with Jack. We got in kind of late (9:00) and Mom was a bit worried, but she was glad I had a good time. Jack picked me up at 7:00 AM, which seemed really early when he told me over the phone yesterday. But considering I woke up at five, it was okay. We ended up going to Sprague Lake, since it is closer to Spokane then any other lake we had considered. It's not the nicest place, very rugged where we were. But it was fun. Jack got a day pass and we spent the whole day out on the water. Jack brought along a radio and we listened to that. I also had brought lunches for us both, so we ate that around noon. Around that time it began to get really hot, so I took off my shirt and lay around in my bathing suit top. Jack too had his bathing suit on in place of regular shorts. So he took off his shirt as well and we had a great time lying around getting a better suntan. Around six Jack said we should start back. So we headed for shore and got everything set up and ready to leave. Well, as we were heading back we both decided that we were hungry. So we pulled into a local diner in the town of Sprague and ate there. Jack and I both had clubhouse sandwiches and lemonades. And then after dinner we got a big thing of red and black licorice to eat on the drive home. The whole way back, as we were eating our candy, Jack and I talked about everything and anything we could think about. About what we wanted to be after college, about our families, school, everything. I had such a great time; I never wanted to go home. Jack is coming over tomorrow and we are going to swim in our pool. I can't wait to show off the rest of my bathing suit to him!

My Dearest Diary,

I have not written in some time--almost two weeks! Sorry about that. I have been so busy with summer jobs, rehearsals, Jack. It's just been crazy. Jack and I have been spending more and more time together. We have gotten so that we carpool to rehearsal together, along with Jack's friend Tommy. Jack will come over after practice, or I will go over to his house. I really like his cousins, Aaron and Felicity. They seem to be really good kids. And they adore Jack. His Aunt Maddy and Uncle Robert are really friendly as well. They are also nice to me and I think they have gotten used to me around. Mother has gotten used to Jack being around too, I think. She doesn't mind anymore when she comes home from work and finds out that Jack is eating over at our house. And she's gotten used to me eating over at Jack's. One thing though, Mollie and Liza have been kind of...I don’t know...avoiding me I guess would be the right word. They just haven't called or been over in a while. I wonder if it's because of Jack. They, along with Sara, met him a few weeks ago. And they all seemed to like him. I don’t know what's going on. Maybe I'll call one of them tonight and see what is going on.

Dear Diary,

Jack and I went out again last night. Nothing fancy, we just went to a movie and then for a soda downtown. But then we took a drive and ended up in a deserted area close to our neighborhood. Then we spent a lot of time in the back of Jack's car. We didn't do anything, just kissed. I don’t know if either of us are ready for a relationship involving sex just yet. You know, diary, that I am sill a virgin. I am not sure about Jack, but from what he has told me I totally think he hasn't gone all the way yet. It sounds like he hasn't had a real serious relationship before. Maybe I shall ask him whether he is or not. But would that scare him off? I never thought I would have sex before I was married, I am not sure I ever wanted to. But now I have been thinking more and more often about it. Not just about with Jack, but about sex in general. That must sound really bad. I am not a sex-crazed person or anything. Maybe I should talk about this with Jack. I wonder if he feels the same way that I do.

Dear Diary,

I spoke with Jack. He is a virgin and he says that he feel like I do (yeah!). He is curious about it, but he doesn't think he is ready right now. I agree. I mean, we have known each other for less than a month. As close as I feel to Jack, I just don't think we are ready. I feel closer to Jack now. More than ever. I think it's a good thing we talked this over. I have rehearsal early tomorrow, so I am going to get to bed. Good night, diary!

Chapter Six
Stories