20. You trespassed onto the Dawson's Creek set and yelled things like "Play hard, Charlie" at Joshua Jackson

19. You have dogs (or children) named Fulton and Portman

18. Whenever you're in a fight your main comeback is "Cake-Eater"

17. You've played one or more practical jokes involving animal feces

16. The word "indignant" is circled in your dictionary

15. You go to the hockey store and buy stick tape because it makes you feel like a hockey player

14. When friends ask you for advice you say things like "soft hands," and "concentration, not strength"

13. You've told at least one person to "be that man"

12. You think Emilio is a good name

11. Shortly after D3 came out you started listening to Pantera and R.E.M.

10. You've learned Icelandic just so you could know what Wolf is saying in D2

9. You own a duck caller. And you use it. In public places. Amid protests.

8. You go to hockey games and chant "hey, goalie goalie goalie, save goalie goalie goalie . . ."

7. You've moved to Minnesota (when people ask you why you say "I left my team in Maine to show the world what I can do")

6. Everyone you don't like has the nickname "Captain Blood"

5. You own a pair of Air Bombay loafers (for kids who want to coach!)

4. You've actually quacked at the principal

3. "We are the Champions" was your grad song

2. You have the recipe for Yan's Hasenpfeffer and Eggs

1. You have a website devoted to the Mighty Ducks which you work on more than two hours a day (wait a minute . . .)

Umm, I just wanted to add that I quacked at my principal (Bob Hunter) this week. (April, 2001)

I was really drunk at the pub last week and went around shouting "I am Goldberg...the goalie!" (November 2001)

Here's a good one I have to add: You bought a copy of The Mighty Ducks in a language you don't even speak. (Guilty! January 2002)