The new kids' action star James Bond Jr. is carrying on his uncle's crusade against high-tech bad guys in books, comics, and a TV show. He doesn't order vodka martinis, shaken or stirred. He doesn't collect babes in bikinis. He doesn't even have a license to kill. But his name is still Bond, James Bond... Jr.
He's not the British spy as a youngster, but his teenage nephew, a hot new kids' character who had playgrounds abuzz across the nation. With a whole licensed-merchandising world of his own, an animated TV show, comic books, paperback novels, toys, and videos, James Bond Jr. reinvented the 007 myth for a whole new generation of kids.
The premise was simple: Bond Jr. attends a prestigious prep school in Britain, where his pals are the teenage progeny of other characters from the 007 movies. There's Qs grandson, I.Q., an electronics wizard who, like gramps, builds high tech spy gizmos. There's Gordo Leiter, surfer-dude son of CIA agent Felix Leiter. When the kids aren't busy with school, they're battling S.C.U.M., an evil organization devoted to spreading evil. And S.C.U.M.'s members include some old familiar faces: updated versions of Dr. No and the metal-mouthed Jaws, as well as a few new bad guys: Skullcap, who has a metal lid on his head, and Dr. Derange, a mad scientist with a horrible, horrible French accent.
Giving 007 a skateboard and sneakers is pretty smart, in terms of money making. Now that the Soviet Union was finished, what more fitting fate for the Cold War icon than to turn him into a harmless teenage action figure, who can be marketed up the wazoo. Nobody gets killed on James Bond Jr., not even after being pushed out of an airplane without a parachute or, say, tied to an Achilles nuclear missile just before blast-off. The body count is similarly modest when it comes to the infamous Bond sex drive; the hottest action Jr. ever sees is an occasional kiss on the cheek.
Despite having the right marketing idea, James Bond Jr.'s creators didn't pull off their concept very well. First, the animation is very lacking. I only personally ever saw a few episodes of James Bond Jr. (a long time ago), and I wasn't impressed. Also, even if the animation was spectacular, it is hard to get worked up over cartoon "action" sequences. Think of cartoon car chases animated aerial stunts. Not that exciting, right.
The plots were also simple, even for children. Only very, very young kids wouldn't have their intelligence insulted by watching the overly simplified, straight forward shows.
The Bond Jr. comic books and novels are worse than the show. They're basically storyboards lifted straight from the TV show. If you haven't read any of these stories, good for you. You've saved several minutes of your life from being wasted. A checklist of the episodes follows: (for a checklist of James Bond Jr. Comic books, look in the Bond Comic book section.)
Based on initial US TV run. First aired September 1991, 65 episodes
1. The Beginning 2. Earth Cracker 3. The Chameleon 4. Shifting Sands 5. Plunder Down Under 6. A Chilling Affair 7. Nothing to Play With 8. Location Danger 9. The Eiffel Missile 10. A Worm in the Apple 11. Valley of the Hungry Dunes 12. Pompeii and Circumstance 13. Never Give a Villain a Fair Shake 14. City of Gold 15. Never Lose Hope 16. No Such Loch 17. Appointment in Macau 18. Lamp of Darkness 19. Hostile Takeover 20. Cruise to Oblivion 21. A Race Against Disaster 22. The Inhuman Race 23. Live and Let's Dance 24. The Sword of Power 25. It's All in the Timing 26. Dance of the Toreadors 27. Fountain of Terror 28. The Emerald Key 29. Ship of Terror 30. Deadly Recall 31. Red Star One 32. Scottish Mist 33. The Art of Evil 34. The Heartbreak Caper 35. Mindfield 36. Leonardo da Vinci's Vault 37. Far Out West 38. Avalanche Run 39. Queen's Ransom 40. Barbella's Big Attraction 41. There for Ms. Fortune 42. Invaders from S.C.U.M. 43. Going for the Gold 44. A Derange Mind 45. Catching the Wave 46. Last of the Tooboos 47. S.C.U.M. on the Water 48. Goldie's Gold Scam 49. Canine Caper 50. Weather or Not 51. Ol' Man River 52. Between a Rock and a Hard Place 53. Sherlock IQ 54. Killer Asteroid 55. Danger Train 56. Quantum Diamonds 57. Rubies Aren't Forever 58. Garden of Evil 59. The Thing in the Ice 60. Goldie Finger at the End of the Rainbow 61. Dutch Treat 62. No Time to Lose 63. Monument to S.C.U.M. 64. Northern Lights 65. Thor's Thunder
