1984
11 kills
First Kill - 9 minutes
1971 - Billy (5 years old?) goes with his family on Christmas Eve to visit his grandfather in a mental institution. When the 2 are alone, grandpa tells Billy that Santa is going to punish him tonight. He tells him to run if he sees Santa! So Billy's freaked out now, right? Well, that's just the start of it all.
Meanwhile, a robber, dressed as Santa, kills a cashier at a local store. He gets out on the road and realizes that he didn't steal nearly enough money. So he pulls his car over and waits for someone to drive by. Billy's parents, driving home after visiting grandpa, see Santa in the middle of the road. They wake Billy up and show him Santa. Well, Billy cries and tells them not to stop, but they ignore him. The guy shoots Billy's dad and pulls his mom out of the car, leaving his little brother in the front seat. Billy climbs out of the back and runs into the woods where he watches the guy try to rape his mom before slashing her throat.
1974 - At a home for orphans, Billy is really messed up. It's Christmas time, but he wants nothing to do with it. However, the head nun, Mother Superior, decides the best way to help him get over his fears is to make him sit on Santa's lap! Well, he clocks Santa in the jaw and haul's ass out of there. He receives the usual punishment of a belt to the butt.
1984 - Billy's all grown up now. He still lives at the orphanage (he's gotta be 17 or 18), but he's looking for a little job. So, one of the nuns helps him get a job at a toy store and the music gets really bad. (Sorry. The bad 80's music seems to have screwed me up as much as Santa did for Billy.) Well, things are going great, even when Christmas time rolls around. He's got problems, but he's learning to deal with them. Until Christmas Eve, that is.
The store has it's own Santa Claus who sits in the corner and lets the kids sit on his lap. Well, on Christmas Eve, he can't make it in to work. So... guess who's asked to fill in? Yup. Billy is now dressed up as jolly ol' Trauma Claus. And he does fine, considering. But once the store closes, and the employees break out the alcohol, people start to get naughty. And we all know who has to punish the naughty people on Christmas Eve. Santa.
It doesn't take Billy long to start rolling. Once he takes out a couple of people in the back of the store, he finishes the other guys off in the front and leaves the store to go out into the world, punishing anyone who's naughty on Christmas Eve.
Billy is a pretty good killer. He runs around yelling "punish!" and doesn't go easy on his victims. His best kill is when he lifts up a topless teenager. He looks around and sees a moose-head wall decoration thing. Well, he sticks the girl straight through the antlers! Another great kill is when this boy steals a sled from another boy. As he's riding down the hill, Billy chops off his head! The sled keeps going! The boy's friend is waiting for him at the bottom of the hill, but all that comes down is the body! Pretty good stuff. Keep in mind that 3 of the 11 kills are the robber's, but all 8 of Billy's are worth seeing.
Now for my problems with the movie. First of all, this cop yells, "There's gotta be a way to predict his next move!" No there's not! He's just randomly killing bad people. Yet they know that he's going to the orphanage next! That's retarded. Another oversight is Billy's little brother. He was an infant in 1971. So, he'd have to be about 13-14 years old, right? He looks about 8. And finally, the music. I've already mentioned how bad it is, but I can't emphasize it enough. They made up a bunch of Christmas carols and they all suck. Some sound like traditional songs, some sound like modern songs. They all sound bad.
I don't know how much I like Christmas horror movies, but this one was pretty good. Like most of these movies, it has some spots where it's really bad. But, we've come to expect that. Overall, I'd like to have seen a few more kills from Billy. I guess the brother will be the killer in part 2. I wonder if he ever ages properly?
-- Coolio
Shut Up!
