1996
12 kills
First Kill - 2 minutes
Not much plot to play around with here. Sam is a pilot in Desert Storm and his plane is shot down. He comes back to life (don't worry, he's still burned up from the plane crash) to kill anyone who is unpatriotic. Dodged Vietnam? You're gone. You don't like taxes? Dead. Pretty good concept.
But what happens? This movie takes like a 30-minute break from killing! Plot!! We don't need plot!! I understand that they're setting up for all of the July 4th Festivities, but for a while, I felt like I was watching a soap opera! Sam's ex-wife is dating a cop. Sam's sister is dating a lawyer. Sam's nephew is showing Sam's medals to his class for show-and-tell. Who cares?? This crap just drags on and on! I almost had to hit fast-forward, but the 4th of July finally came.
First, Sam needs a disguise. So, he kills the guy who's dressed as Uncle Sam for the big party or whatever. Then he goes around killing. Pretty simple really.
Sam is definitely unique. He tries to be witty with his little one-liners, but they don't nearly match up to Angela or Freddy. I think they could've done better there. But, hey, at least he's trying! And some of his kills are great. He strings a guy up a flag pole. He sticks yet another flag pole through a guy's chest. Patriotic-themed killing, man. He also kills a guy with fireworks. However, there are a couple of crap kills and even a couple that we don't see. In the end, it's obvious that he's trying, but he's just not capable of being in that upper echelon of killers.
Like I said, the movie itself would be much better without those 30 minutes of drama stuffed in. Just make it a one-hour short film of killing. But... you have to love any horror movie with Isaac Hayes! Chef!! At the end, when he's helping 2 boys try to kill Sam, if you close your eyes, you can imagine it's a South Park horror movie! You can do a lot worse than this movie. Trust me, we have.
-- Coolio
