$99 Cruise Special

A blonde walks by a travel agency and notices a sign
in the window, "Cruise Special -- $99!"

So she goes inside, lays her money on the counter and
says, "I'd like the $99 cruise special, please."
The agent grabs her, drags her into the back room,
ties her to a large inner tube, then drags her out the
back door and downhill to the river, where he pushes
her in and sends her floating.

A second blonde comes by a few minutes later, sees the
sign, goes inside, lays her money on the counter, and
asks for the $99 special. She too is tied to an inner
tube and sent floating down the river.

Somehow drifting into stronger current, she eventually
catches up with the first blonde. They float side by
side for a while before the first blonde asks, "Do
they serve refreshments on this cruise?"

The second blonde replies,"They didn't last year...."

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Milk Bath

 

This blonde heard that milk baths would

make her beautiful. She left a note for her

milkman to leave 15 gallons of milk. When

themilkman read the note he felt there must

be a mistake. He thought she probably

meant 1.5 gallons, so he knocked on the

door to clarify the point.  The blonde came

to the door and the milkman said, "I found

your note to leave 15 gallons of milk. Did

you mean 1.5 gallons?" The blonde said,

"I want 15 gallons. I'm going to fill my

bath tub up with milk and take a milk bath."
The milkman asked, "Pasteurized?"
The blonde said, "No, just up to my tits."