One upon a time there lived a pair of fraternal twin sisters named Margaret and Sarah, but everyone called Margaret Maggie. Both girls were about the same height, both worshiped potatoes and both hated Diana with a passion.
The girls lived with their mother, a red haired skeptic with a furious temper, their father, a tall believer in extra-terrestrial life forms who loses his gun more times than any other human, and their little sisters, who were also fraternal twins, Samantha and Melissa, better known as Missy.
Something that they didn't love and they didn't hate was Lime-Green Jello. They had both had it on a few seperate occasions, but it wasn't anything special.
"It's time we did something about it," Sarah said in a brave voice.
So the girls took a one mile walk down to Walgreens. They stopped at Video Craze (which was next to Walgreens) first to rent The Amityville Horror and Pinocchio's Revenge.
Once inside Walgreens, they went down to the aisle farthest away from the door, with all the sodas. On the other side of the aisle were twenty-one different flavours of Jello.
Maggie plucked a package of Lime-Green Jello off the shelf. "Got it," she said.
"Now we need spices."
So they took a flight out to England and put the Spice Girls into a large blender. First they threw in Baby Spice. They could hear her agonizing screams of terror and pain...that was, until the blade pierced right through her temple and began to swirl spongry grey brain matter around in her cute, blond little head.
"Muahahahahahaha!!!" Sarah screamed triumphantly, tossing Posh Spice into the bloody (literally bloody) mess.
Two days later, the girls returned to their home in Georgetown, receiving strange looks from their parents. "What's in the bag?" their mother asked.
"An alien," Maggie replied seriously.
Their mother rolled her eyes. "Yeah right."
Their father, on the other hand, was intrigued. "Can I see?"
"I doubt it," Maggie said in a monotonous voice. "If you do, I may become very agitaed and strung up, which may very well result in my death."
"Well, bye then," he said.
They got to their bedroom. "Why did we do that?" Maggie asked.
Sarah shrugged. "Well we're certainly not putting dead Spice Girls into our Jello. That was just for fun."
The dead, terrible singers were hidden in the closet until they could be properly disposed of. Maggie and Sarah then went to the kitchen, and spent the rest of the day trying to figure out how they would get potatoes into the Lime Green Jello. Sarah was checking on the boiling potatoes while Maggie was cutting up pickles.
"What else should we put in there?"
"Well, I hate water, so let's put a different beverage in," Maggie suggested.
So instead of water, they used iced tea.
They finished and they took a bite. It was delicious. It was finished up in 11.21 seconds, that1s how wonderful it tasted.
What they didn't realize was that what they had created wasn't just a yummy Jello. They had accidently mixed up the wrong types of things. When they mixed the iced tea and potatoes, they had created a mixture that causes heightened psychosis. When they mixed the Jello with the pickles, they had created a mixture that causes heightened weirdness.
And as you will soon learn, the results were not your ordinary results.
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