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CHAPTER 2
Above a Whisper
Laughter is the most precious gift any friend can receive. Some people have a very hard life; sharing a gift of laughter is special. Cancer strikes many; one of the friends online had this disease. Florida Gentleman was his alias; his real name was never used in the chat rooms. His courage overwhelmed me at times.
The Cancerous tumor was wrapped around his vocal cords and voice box. He lost his voice due to the tumor; his voice box was removed to save his life. He lost his ability to speak at a volume many of us take for granted. Florida Gentleman could not speak above a whisper for the rest of his life. Self conscious, he would not talk to many, he relied on typing. He trusted few with his secret.
In a chat room people type so all can see in an “open room” forum. A window comes up on the computer to bring lots of people together to discuss many different subjects. Different emotions can be expressed with the “tone” used. Capital letters in chats are considered yelling. Flaming, which is talking bad to someone else, can be accented with exclamation marks. The point is made clear to all.
At his computer, his typing in the room almost made him feel like a normal human being. His words could be “heard” like other peoples. He was no different; yelling was a luxury, which he could not do, in real life. Arguments away from his computer were very frustrating to him; his point could not be made. A whisper does not satisfy great anger.
A joke told in a whisper to his peers, in real life, lost the impact. Straining to hear his words drew away from the punch line. Typing in the chat rooms was a release from the feeling of being different. He typed his jokes; all “heard” them with no problem. Laughter was shown through out the whole room. His witty comments and jokes showed his true personality. A true comic was revealed. He could not laugh out loud, but in his mind, in the chat room, he could. It was his release from reality, to be able to show his loud laughter.
Intelligence also was revealed; his knowledge of computers is immense. This Florida Gentleman helped many people with their computers. He patiently guided them through the steps fixing their computers, taking hours at times to help. Problems a technician would have charged $50 an hour to fix. His voice was the words he typed.
Seldom did any one know his frustration, his problems. A cancer scare reoccurred. Doctor's tests revealed cancer might be affecting other parts of his body. Remission could be over, chemotherapy; radiation could be a part of his life once again.
He trusted few to his secrets. His love for people is evident. He did not want to burden others with his bad news. In the real world his muted voice, stops others from wanting to know this wonderful man. It is their loss. His courage to face each day should humble anyone who complains about petty things in life.
This poem is a small way to show his courage:
WITHOUT WORDS
Times are hard, you feel the touch
Of friends who are there and know so much
You cannot speak, of things that are wrong
But others hear and know your song.
You wish to be loud, you wish to be heard
To speak and talk, as free as the bird
Voices are calling, you wish to respond
The spirit is willing, the ability is gone.
All is not lost, others can hear
The friendship you offer, the heart of a dear
Souls speak freely, of this I do know
The voice isn’t important, beauty is though.
The touch you give, is gentle and kind
A hug, a kiss, and small little signs
Words are not spoken, this I have saw
But love is shown, to one and to all
Words are not heard, but love is spoken
Kindness and good will never be broken
Souls are special, so very true
This my friend, is dedicated to you.
