Title: Hope Author: M (Starbuk42@aol.com) Rating: G Category: VA, M/S Friendship Spoilers: None Summary: Scully ponders Mulder and all they've been through. (Scully,First Person) Archive: Gossamer, yes. Anywhere else, ask me first. I'll let you. Disclaimer: Mulder, Scully and any other characters mentioned from the show belong to CC, 1013 Productions, and Fox. They are used without permission. This is for entertainment, not profit. Feedback: Is more than graciously accepted. I will also accept constructive criticism. And if you just want to tell me you read it, I'd like thattoo. E- mail to Starbuk42@aol.com Notes: This may seem kinda gloomy, but I promise you, it has a happy ending. (More notes at the end.) If you'd like to read more of my fanfic, please visit my website: http://members.aol.com/Starbuk42/ Enjoy! Hope by M Sometimes I wonder if there's any hope at all. Or if they just torture us with believing that there is, only to find out, when it's too late, that there isn't. I don't claim to know all the answers. I don't claim to understand. Sometimes I don't even care, but when I see what they've done, I couldn't help but hate them for it. And I can't help but want to make them feel just a little of the pain I've felt, suffer just a portion of what I've suffered. I thought there was justice. I believed in it. But now I'm not so sure. Sometimes I just want to give up, make it all go away. Forget all the pain. Start over. But I know I can't. I'm in too deep. I wonder if it can get any worse. And then I look over at him. And I feel sorrow. His face is long and drawn. And his brow is furrowed deeply inconcentration. He's spent his whole life searching. Trying to grasp this impossible truth. And all he's gotten is endless grief and despair. They did this to him. They've done this us. And I can't make it go away. I can't stop this. And I just wish I could. I wish they wouldn't make things so hard. I wish they wouldn't drive us to do the things we do. I wish they wouldn't take away all I ever had. And then I realize they haven't. I realize I still have the things that I hold most dear. I realize we are still together. And together we are strong. Together we will survive. Together. They can destroy my mind. They can destroy my body. But they cannot destroy my heart. They cannot destroy my hope. But is there really hope? After all the agony, distress, and misery, I wonder if there's any hope at all. I wonder if there's hope for us. And then I look up once more, and I see him smile. And I know there has to be. The End Feedback graciously accepted. And I will always reply. Tell me what you thought. --> Starbuk42@aol.com Notes: There is one line in this story that I didn't exactly come up with. It came from a song, but I kinda switched the words around. The original lyrics went like this: "Destroy the mind-destroy the body-but you cannot destroy the heart." I thought that just fit perfectly for Scully, and so I had to use it. That quote just happens to be from a Smashing Pumpkins song, and if you've read some of my other pieces, you've probably noticed I quote from their songs a lot. Well, I like 'em, but one of the main reasons is, I think they write great lyrics, and I can always find a line that relates to something I'm writing. So I just thought I'd mention that. Thanks for reading!