Laughter and children's playful screams filled the backyard of Brian's house later that evening. They were having a cookout for AJ's birthday, one in which the parents and grandparents and neighbors were there, the club scheduled for later on that night was just for the guys and their dates. Nick sat in a chair on the far end of the deck, the party wasn't in full swing yet so the main noise was Sidney, Skylar and a few of the neighborhood kids running around playing freeze tag. His mind wandered as he watched his daughter run around the back yard, she was a mixture of Whit and himself, her long hair dirty blonde and slightly curly, long legs provided by both her parents, she owned that one and only Carter smile and she had the astounding blue eyes that belonged to only one other mortal, her mother. Nick couldn't believe how fast she had came into his life, he'd had two weeks to prepare to become a father, he closed his eyes as the sun rays grew brighter and the day that ruined and blessed his life came back.
*flashback*
The doctor entered the waiting room, looking around at the young frightened faces, mentally putting together his words, "Do any of you know how to get in touch with Whitney's parents or any family member?" he asked.
"She doesn't have any, all of her grandparents were dead before she was born and by the time she was twelve, both her parents were, she lived in and out of foster homes until she was sixteen, your looking at her family, doctor" Nick answered, looking around at his four bandmates and Whitney's three best friends, Amber, Ashley and Lauren.
"Well, we were able to save the baby and she will have to say in the hosptial for around two weeks, due to premature birth......" the doctor began.
Nick's face fell, "The baby?" he asked, looking over at the girls, if anyone knew about this, they would.
"Nick, sit down please" Ashley said, gently pulling on his arm as he collapsed into the chair beside Brian.
"Whit was five months pregnant, she didn't know until this morning, she was on her way to tell you when she got in the wreck, she wanted you to know and I promise she wasn't hiding anything from you" Amber explained.
"But how didn't I notice?" Nick asked, more to himelf than anyone else.
"Nick, nobody did, it was a complete surprise to all of us this morning, I mean Whit hadn't gained hardly any weight, when she was sick a couple of months ago we just thought of it was a virus or something, she never said anything about it to us" Lauren answered.
"What about her?" Nick asked as a single tear slid down his cheek.
"Not too good I'm afraid" the doctor answered before more tears began to slide down Nick's cheeks.
"Can I see her, please?" Nick asked.
"Yes, follow me please" the doctor replied, motioning with his hand.
Nick lifted himself from the chair with every ounce of energy that was left in his body, he couldn't believe what was going on, just last night they'd been together. The guys had thrown a party on the beach, after it they had taken a romantic walk, just the two of them then she had spent the night with Nick. Closing his eyes Nick could still feel the beating of her heart as their two bare bodies lay close together in the darkness. He swallowed back tears as he rounded the corner into a room and was left alone with the person he loved more than anything. He walked up to the beside and ran his hand over her forehead which was partly covered with a crust of dried blood, her eyes closed, her lips closed and her body completely still, almost as if she was frozen in one position. He let his hand run down the path of her cheek, down across her collar bone and down her arm until his hand met with hers, he wrapped his fingers around hers, letting the tears that were now falling keep going. He began to speak, "I know you can hear me so I'll just carry on this conversation, I don't want you to blame youself for anything going on right now, I know that you didn't know about being pregnant until this morning and you were on your way to come and tell me when this happened" he choked on his words, "But please don't leave me here, in this world without you, I'm not gonna do so good. We have a little girl now, I'll name her Sidney, like you always wanted and I'll love her with every breath I take and never let anything happen, I promise you that. Just hold on for me, for us, please Whit, I love you, since the first time I saw you my life has been whole, I've actually lived a complete life for the past three years. But please, if you can fight whatevers going on inside you right now and if you can win this, don't lose, because l need you and I'm gonna love you, always and forever" he finished, pressing his lips to hers as the doctor reappeared in the doorway.
"I'm sorry sir, but you have to go now" he spoke, Nick nodded and reluctantly released his grasp on the lifeless hand he was holding, he held his head down as he walked into the main hall, just as he rounded the corner and saw everyone else still sitting in the waiting room he heard loud beeping and a voice distinctly say, "We've lost her, time of death eight forty nine PM".
Nobody else must have heard the announcment because their faces still held hardly no expression except deep thought, they were all staring at Nick. "She couldn't win it" he spoke, his bottom lip shaking as well as his whole lower legs which soon gave out beneath him. He sat on his knees, sobbing, letting the tears that were destined to fall pour from his eyes. He stretched out his body in the hallway, not really caring if anyone needed to get through, he didn't care about anything at the particular moment, he folded his arms across one another and buried his face in them as he contined to mourn his loss. "Its not fair Brain" he finally spoke through his tears, his voice shaky as his best friend kneeled down on the floor beside him.
"I know Nick, your right its not fair" Brian agreed, a few tears streaming down his own face.
"I mean, why her?" he asked as he sat up and propped himself up against the cold hospital walls that were seeming to close in on him. "Brian, I know your trying to help, but do you think maybe I could just sit here for a while, by myself, I need some time" Nick more directed than asked.
Brian nodded as he went back over to everyone else, everyone was crying, Kevin, AJ and Howie were trying to keep the other girls in tact while Brian was being there for his own best friend. The chime of the elevator doors sounded and Brian looked up to see Jane Carter walk through. The accident had happened about ten in the morning, Brian knew Whit was in bad condition from the beginning and he had called Jane in California right after Whitney had been admitted, knowing that Nick was going to need her. Jane had caught the first flight out of LA to Orlando and now stood in the waiting room looking down the hall at her son who was in the corner, curled up like a small child. She acknowledged Brian and he mouthed, "She didn't make it". Janes heart and eyes fell as she swallowed deep and made her way down the hall, ready to be there for her son. "Nick?" She asked, standing over him.
"Mama" he answered, he only called her that when he needed a crutch to lean on.
"I'm sorry baby" Jane said, sitting down beside him and bringing him into a warm hug, rubbing his back in a circular motion as his tears cascaded down her shoulder.
"And she was pregnant, the baby made it, but she didn't, she didn't..." Nick drifted off as more tears came, Jane nodded, Brian had explained on their phone conversation. Jane stood to her feet, pulling Nick up with her, his chest heaved up and down in heavy rapid breathes as he broke down in his mother's arms.
"You'll make it son, I promise" She assured, Nick just shook his head in her arms as he let her be there for him
*end flashback*
"Nick, man, you there?" AJ asked, waving his hand in front of Nick's expressionless face.
"Yeah, sorry" Nick answered.
"Your goin with us, right?" Howie asked as he came up to the two.
"Well, I guess" Nick faught with his descisions.
"Well lets go" AJ recommended, Nick nodded as he stood up and surveyed the yard that was now being shaded by the setting southern sun, he was looking for Sidney. "She's inside" AJ offered, Nick nodded again as he entered the house and found her spread out on the couch watching Blue's Clues.
"Daddys gonna go to the grown-up's party, ok?" Nick asked as he knelt down and looked at her.
"Ok, are you coming back?" Sidney asked.
"Of course, I'll pick you up later on, you and Skylar be nice little girls and listen to Mrs. Leviner" Nick instructed, kissing Sid on the cheek and standing up.
"Ok, bye daddy, love you" Sidney replied.
"Love you too" Nick said as he followed behind the guys to the front door.