back to ye' olde page of parodies
back to the page of my parodies
"No Condiments" by Alan "I'm not telling you my last name"
A condiment is an item fast food restaurants think you want
that is also known is extra crap
always telling them I want a plain cheeseburger
no lettuce for my fat ass
so (no)
I don't want no lettuce I don't want no tomatoes (no) I don't want no mayonaise nowhere I don't want none of your onions and (no)
chorus
I don't want no condiments
a condiment is just something that doesn't go on my double cb
hanging out the passengers side of the drive thru window
of my best friend's ride
trying to holler at the burger King employee
a tomato is on my burger
but I specifically said no way
and I know the employee will be angrily approached by me
cuz I asked for no condiments and they give me this crap
can't speak enligsh with these deadbeat asses so (no)
I don't want no lettuce
don't want no tomato
I don't want no mayonaise nowhere and (no)
chorus
I I don't want no condiments
a condiment is sometihng that can't go on my double cb
hanging out the pssaenger's side at the drive through window
of my best friend's ride
trying to holler that the burger king employee
if you speak english and I'm talking
oh yes sir I'm asking for no condiments
your gonna take off the lettuce
oh yes ma'am I'm talking to you
If you have mayonaise on it but you don't tell me
oh yes sir I'm talking to you
wanna give me a double cb with no extra crap
oh no I don't want no (oh)
no condiment (no no)
no condiment (no no no no)
no condiment
chorus
see, if you can't spacially expand my taste buds
then that leaves you in a class of condiments never risin
I don't find it surprisin'
if you only have the cheese
to please me and from here to the coast of overseas
so, let me give you Burger King employees something to think about
taking 2 measely pieces of tomato off won't wear you out
can't forget the english i speak to you
i'm as clear as DVD on digital tv screen
satisfy my appetite with no condiments
and that's spectacular
Mr. Big Lettuce, If you really wanna know
I could go some silly tomatoes
but you don't hear me though
chorus x2