Family Ties

Life on the Backstreet tour ran fairly smoothly over the next month or so. Libby started helping the sound technicians set up and enjoyed it. It made her feel like she was earning her place on the tour instead of just being Kevin’s little sister and Nick’s girlfriend. She thought she had a good relationship with Nick. Nothing serious or heavy. They were just having fun in each other’s company. Or so she thought.
“I love you,” Nick suddenly said one night as he let Libby beat him at Madden. Libby pretended she hadn’t heard him and he let it pass for a couple of minutes. “I love you,” he said again.
“I heard,” she muttered.
“Well I do Libby.”
“Ok,” she carried on playing but he put his controller down.
“Ok? Is that it?”
“What?” she looked at him.
“Libs, I just told you I love you,” he stared at her. “I’da thought that was comment worthy.”
“I commented. I said ok.”
“You didn’t feel the urge to say anything back?”
“I don’t love you Nick,” she said and a look of hurt flashed across his eyes. “I’m sorry but I just thought we were doin’ ok as we were. Havin’ fun and stuff, nothin’ serious.”
“Great,” he stood up. “Thanks for telling me BEFORE I went and fell in love with you.”
“I didn’t mean this to happen. I’m not completely over Paul yet. He’s still here,” she touched her head. “And until I get over him, I can’t fall in love with anyone. Not even you.”
“So that’s it? I’ve been wasting my time?”
“No, I’ve loved being with you.”
“But you don’t love me huh?” he said bitterly and she shook her head slowly. “Better knowin’ now than later I guess.”
“I’m sorry,” Libby whispered as he brushed past her and left the room.
Libby looked back at the TV screen flashing the words “Game Over” and groaned. She needed a drink. She headed out of the hotel room and down to the bar. AJ was there and she grabbed a JD and coke before joining him.
“Hey,” AJ greeted. “What you doin’ here?”
“I needed a strong drink. You?”
“I’m kinda drawn here,” AJ confessed. “Even though I’m sober now, it’s kinda like my spiritual home I guess.”
“There’s worst places,” Libby said taking a drink.
“So,” AJ faced her. “Any reason for the strong drink?”
“Yeah, I just ended it with Nick.”
“Oh. You or him?”
“Me,” she pulled a face. “He told me he loves me.”
“Ah, unrequited huh?”
“Yup. I mean, he’s a great guy and I had fun bein’ with him but… I’m still kinda gettin’ over somebody else.”
“Oh?” AJ raised an eyebrow and she laughed.
“Don’t tell me my dear brother and cousin didn’t tell you?”
“Nup, they don’t tell me anything,” AJ shook his head with a grin. “Always outta the loop.”
“Short story – my last boyfriend turned Tyson on me. It was hard to get away cos he kinda OWNED me for a while. His family owned the company where I worked and he gave me the deposit for my apartment. I finally got away and rented a place in San Reno but he started calling me and threatening stuff. So hey presto, I hopped a bus out to you guys.”
“Whoa. Serious stuff,” AJ whistled. “And he’s the guy you’re still in love with?”
“Not in love with, but he’s still in my head.”
“Ah, I get you. You can’t exactly fall in love with somebody new until you’ve dealt with the baggage.”
“Yup, ain’t that the truth,” Libby took another long drink. “Well I’m glad you’re not yellin’ at me.”
“Why would I?” AJ shrugged. “Sure, I feel for Nick but it happens. He’ll get over it.”
“I hope Brian agrees.”
“Should be interesting,” chuckled AJ. “The guy who feels like he has to protect Nick AND his lil cousin… I wonder which feeling will out?”

“Real good goin’ Libs,” Brian said as he marched into her hotel room the next morning. “Just go and break Nick’s heart despite everything I warned ya about.”
“I didn’t think he was gonna fall in love with me,” Libby protested.
“Well he did.”
“I just thought he was havin’ fun like I was…”
“Yeah well we can’t all pick and choose who we fall in love with now,” Brian said angrily and Libby stared at him.
“What’s THAT supposed to mean?”
“You can fall in love with a rich kid who uses his fists but you can’t fall for NICK?!”
“C’mon, that’s not FAIR!” Libby yelled. “You think I CHOSE to get beaten up?”
“Well they do say victims are attracted to abusers.”
“I’m a VICTIM now?!”
“You didn’t get out Libby! You let him hit you and you didn’t even pick up the phone to call me!” Brian stood right in front of her. “I don’t BELIEVE you! Have you any idea how shitty me and Kevin feel right now cos of YOU?!”
“Oh, it’s all MY fault huh?”
“Well I don’t see anybody else standing here.”
“You bastard,” she said quietly as tears filled her eyes. “I was SCARED to tell you what was happening because I thought it might make you love me less and I couldn’t stand that. And I stayed for as long as I did because I didn’t have anywhere else to go.”
“Oh don’t give me that! You had PLENTY of places to go. You coulda gone back to Kentucky, or to Kevin’s or to my place.”
“I didn’t feel I could! You have Leigh now and Kevin has Kris. And I know you guys barely see each other as it is. I didn’t think you’d exactly welcome me fucking up your together time.” Libby turned away from him and headed towards the door. “Well, don’t worry Brian. I’ll just go back out there and be a VICTIM again.”
“You dare walk away from me now,” he warned her and she turned around.
“What you gonna do? Hit me?!”
“God, Libby,” he groaned. “I just wanted you to trust me. I know I’m real angry at you right now and you probably don’t understand but just put yourself in my place for a minute. You got this cousin who you watched grow up and who you think of as a sister. She goes to LA to try and make her own way. At first she keeps in touch but gradually that peters out and all of a sudden you’re totally out of the loop…”
“But I…”
“Hey,” Brian held up his hand and she shut up. “You miss her and you worry about her but you tell yourself she needs the space and she’ll get in touch when she needs you. Only she doesn’t. She just turns up outta the blue looking real pale and skinny. And she tells you everything is fine. You just can’t get her to trust you and you wonder where you went wrong, how did you let her get so far away from you? Finally, you find out she got beaten by the guy who was supposed to look after her. And she was too scared to tell you. So she stayed with him, believing she was a nobody. But she’s not a nobody. She’s your family. And if she believes herself to be a nobody then she believes you are too. Even though she finally told you what happened, she still won’t let you help and pretends everything’s great. But you see the darkness in her eyes and you see that she’s not ok. But there isn’t a damn thing you can do…” He looked at her. “Wouldn’t that make you angry too?”
“Brian…” she said before her tears started to fall, making further words impossible. She reached her hand out to him and he pulled her close. He wrapped his arms around her and just held her until the tears subsided. Then he looked at her and smoothed her hair back from her damp face. “I’m sorry, Brian.”
“Me too Libs.”
“But it is gonna be ok. I’m gonna get over him.”
“How Libby?”
“I’ll go back to my place in LA and I’ll clear my stuff out. And then I’m gonna go straight to the local police and give them his name.”
“Really? You’ll press charges?”
“I’ll try my best,” she smiled at him and he smiled back.
“That’s my cousin. He’ll soon learn he can’t fuck with our family and get away with it.”
“Yeah,” she nestled into his arms for a few more minutes before breaking away to splash cold water on her face. “I am sorry about Nick.”
“He’ll be ok.”

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