Mercedes and Meredith celebrated the completion of Meredith’s recording sessions with a shopping spree. After which they planned a late dinner at one of Meredith’s favorite restaurants.
"I do like that one on you, Meredith, but I think you’d be happier with the teal colored one." Mercedes said.
"Aren’t you going to try any more on?" Meredith asked. "I really like the ivory dress you bought. But, I can’t believe you are DONE already!"
Mercedes smiled, "I’ll never be completely done shopping, Meredith. I am just done for tonight. I’m wiped out! How soon can we go eat?"
Mixed in with the laughter was the sound of Mercedes’ cell phone. "Hey Darlin’. Did ya find what you were looking for?" The sound of Lance’s voice immediately sent goose bumps down Mercedes’ arms.
Mercedes tilted her head to one side, and wrapped her heart around the sound waves. "Be." She sighed. Even though she had just spoken to him a few hours ago, each time he had the chance to call it was manna from heaven to her.
"Are you asking me if I found what I was looking for during my shopping spree OR something more important?" Mercedes’ voice became hushed, "Cause I found all I was ever looking for in a soul mate, when I found you." Mercedes paused, "Now, I really meant that, Lance."
"No, Darlin‘, that was wonderful to hear. Thank you." She could almost see Lance’s shy grin in his voice.
"Have you spoken to Justin since that interview in Portland?" Mercedes asked.
She was referring to a local early morning talk show that aired live in Portland that the guys did. When the host of the talk show asked Justin the infamous question about Britney, Justin eluded to Britney being a friend to all the guys, ‘just like Mercedes McKenzie is.’
"No, I haven’t. I’m sorry Mercedes, no matter what J does any more it just gets under my skin."
"You know in Justin’s own way he was just trying to make things easier."
"He’s great for sending mixed signals and he knows I don’t like it." Lance said. "Besides, do you believe for a minute that Justin would do anything that wasn‘t in his best interest no matter what it might mean to someone else?"
Mercedes sighed.
"Darlin’ I know I promised to try and patch this thing up with J. But, do you understand what you’re asking of me? It’s to the point now that I’d be kissing Justin butt just for peace and harmony. It would look like I‘m a total wuss. I can‘t back down to him. All this is just one huge power play for him."
"If you understood how this makes me feel, Lance, I believe that you would." Lance answered quietly, "This is NOT your fault."
"Of course it is."
"Justin just wants everything his way, and I can’t...okay I WON’T give in to him."
"Be, I don’t expect you to give in to what he wants from you. You can’t! What Justin wants is impossible for us at this point. And deep inside Justin knows it too. Only, could you look at it from his prospective?"
"What prospective would that be, Darlin’? The ‘I AM TIMBERLAKE, I AM GOD’ prospective?" Lance asked sarcastically.
"Lance..."
"Okay, I’m sorry. Let’s not let this be on our minds any more. There’s too much to look forward to, Mercedes. We aren’t going to let Justin upset our plans."
"Lance, he already has. I don’t think he means to. But since he’s always been one of your best friends, it’s inevitable. If you two cannot patch this thing up it’s going to be on our minds, even if unspoken. A shadow over our most sacred of days."
Lance took a deep breath, "I will try...harder. Okay?"
"When I spoke to you this morning you said you felt a little funky. Are you feeling any better? Is your stomach still upset?" Lance asked.
"I’m feeling great right now. I had a banana, some cereal and tea at lunch." Lance was very concerned about how Mercedes seemed to be worn out lately.
"I want you to see a doctor and make sure you don’t have the flu. You just don‘t have your usual caffeine high."
Something Lance said brought to mind a statement Joey made to her the year before about her not having her usual "pep".
"Lance, if I have the flu I don’t think there’s much a doctor can do for you. But, I will check it out because I wouldn’t want you to catch it."
"I’m not worried about that. Whatever you’ve got, I want." Lance laughed. "No matter what it might be. Let’s share it."
Mercedes laughed, "Believe me you don’t want to feel sick every morning the past week and feel like crawling into bed and taking a nap every afternoon."
"I might not want to have an upset stomach, but crawling into bed every afternoon really sounds like a good idea. Especially if you were there waiting for me."
Mercedes grew quiet. ‘Oh, you don’t suppose?’ Mercedes’ mind started racing . ‘I need to grab my date book.’ she was falling into a panic. Mercedes clawed through her purse. ‘I honestly don’t remember the last time...I usually put a little ‘p’ in the corner of the date on the calendar.’
There was a long silence.
"Mercedes, are you still there?" Lance asked.
Mercedes swallowed hard. The last date marked on her calendar was May 6.
"Mercedes?" Lance asked, "What’s going on?"
"Nothing. Nothing. Just nothing." Mercedes was stunned over the possibility.
"Okay..." Lance said hesitantly. "Can you fly out to be with me before Denver? There’s an appearance we have scheduled for television and we have to do that and shoot another video over the 2 days in between Salt Lake City and Denver shows. Mercedes? Did you hear me, Darlin’?"
"Yes, I heard you, Be. You’ll be exhausted."
"Now that the recording is finished. Can you join me out here?"
"I really want to but, if I have the flu, it might not be a good idea."
"I don’t care about that."
"Well, you should! You need to stay healthy. You’ve got a lot on your plate right now. I certainly wouldn’t want to add to your stress or burden you with my...flu."
Lance started to laugh, "Darlin’ people on this tour get sick all the time. Although, I have to say it’s usually self-inflicted. Don’t go getting into a panic. If I get sick, I get sick. It doesn’t worry me!" Mercedes thought for a minute, "Lance. I think it’s a good idea for me to visit Victoria in Boston. Would it be okay with you if I spent these last few days with her before our wedding?"
Lance resigned to his fate said, "Well, of course it is, Baby."
As soon as Mercedes got settled into her old bedroom on Beacon Hill, she laid down and put her feet up. She was back in her childhood home. Lance and the rest of the guys were taping the television appearance in Los Angeles, and he was planning on calling her during their few hours of rest at their hotel. After that they would head out to shoot the "It’s Gonna Be Me" video.
When Mercedes had rested for a while, she decided to take the package she brought with her out of the suitcase. She went into the bathroom and started the process of finding out. She calmed her fears by laying back down and reading a book of poetry that belonged to Lance. He had creased some pages he had particularly liked. One popped out at her. ‘Shakespeare!’ Mercedes smiles.
"Weary with toil, I haste me to my bed.
The dear repose for limbs with travel tired,
But, then begins a journey in my head
To work my mind when body’s work’s expired;
For then my thoughts, from far where I abide,
Intend a zealous pilgrimage to thee..."
In the margins of the passage, Lance wrote a few notes. Her studio schedule was there for the day he was probably reading this. A heart was drawn on the page. ‘What will he say? What will he think? What shall I say? What shall we do?’ Mercedes closes her eyes. She refuses to submit to all the negative thoughts that float around her.
Lance had said ‘No matter what.’ And she knew she could believe him. Mercedes hung on to that. Mercedes PRAYED that she and Lance had the strength to be not just a couple, but a family now. It wasn’t going to make keeping it quiet an option for long. So, if they didn’t have the strength, she prayed that God would give them the strength they would need.
"Can I get you anything, Mercedes?" Victoria asked her.
Mercedes shook her head. "What were you thinking? You’re as fertile as a rabbit. This is not good news for Lance and his career, Mercedes."
"I am aware of that, Victoria." A few arrant tears slipped past her lashes and spilled down onto her cheeks. "But, Lance loves children as much as I do. He will be happy. I think he will be happy."
"At 21? I don’t think you should expect that of him. He’s just beginning to kick up his heels. Liam was less than thrilled, you said so yourself. And Liam was 38!!" Victoria seemed to delight in turning the knife, "Men like Liam and Lance have made big career plans and I can’t see where a baby would fit in."
"Lance and Liam were too very different men. You can’t lump them both together."
When the timer went off, Mercedes asked, "Victoria, would you? Please?"
When she went into the bathroom to check, Victoria was stunned to find that it did indicate that Mercedes was pregnant. ‘Damn that girl.’ But, her being the only one to witness the results gave her an opportunity to buy some time.
It was disposed of, and no one would be the wiser. "Good news Mercedes! You aren’t pregnant after all."
Mercedes smiled meekly. That was a relief, and it was good news. Although, a tiny part of her heart sunk. ‘Some day. Some day.’
"Now it’s more urgent than ever to take care of Mercedes once and for all."
"It’s not going to be so simple. She’s marrying him and having their baby..."
"She doesn’t know about the baby. We still have time to make arrangements for an accident...I’m sure Dr. Westfall won’t mind helping us out with the bad news."
"What bad news?" Dr. Fitzpatrick asked.
"What about her senetil shots?"
"She’s getting placebos."
"She doesn’t know that. Mercedes thinks she’s been taking them right along. What kind of damage could that do to a fetus?"
"Alright. Lance? Lance I’ve got something for you." Johnny called him over, and placed a small package in his hands. "You don’t want me to know, fine...but all the best to you and Mercedes, Lance."
Lance smiled at him, "Thanks Johnny."
"Oh and Lance, I got some info on that Norm Conroy you asked me about. He never worked with Liam...at least not officially. Wasn’t even in any position to have anything to do with *N SYNC that we can see. For some reason though, everyone thinks he’s the guy who probably knows where all the skeletons are buried, if that’s what you’re interested in."
"To tell you the truth, Johnny, I’m not even sure what I’m looking for. I just need to know why this guy has made it his personal mission to raise questions in Mercedes’ mind about Liam and myself."
"Lance, Joey’s looking for you." Lance slipped the ring into his pocket and headed over to the dressing room.
After he was through the door, it slammed behind him.
"Wha?" Lance spun around. Chris, J.C., Joey and Justin were all sitting around the dressing room.
"These guys think you and I need to talk." Justin said with a bored, disinterested, monotone voice. "Ho hum."
"This wasn’t my idea..." Lance began in a voice angry at Justin’s sarcasm. Then, Lance remembered his promise to Mercedes.
"Well, it sure as hell wasn’t mine!" Justin yelled, "Lemme out of here!"
"Justin, it wasn’t yours either, I know. But, I’m...grateful to the guys for bringing us together just the same. We DO need to talk. This HAS gone on too long."
"Maybe for you Scoop, but I’m not about to kiss and make up. You’ve been a complete and utter crap head for weeks now."
"Excuse me?" Lance was seeing red and an instant headache had developed. "EXCUSE ME?" He placed his hands on his hips and counted silently to ten. ‘ONE... Oh I love that girl, TWO... Oh I love that girl, Three...’ he kept reminding himself why he wasn’t storming out of the dressing room.
"We’re not going to let either one of you off the hook, J. You’re both going to share the blame for this one. You’ve both been complete and utter crap heads." Chris said.
"Lance, if you want me to pretend that I’m happy for you and Mercedes I can do that. But, it’d be a lie. I can’t believe you’d even consider making a commitment when there’s so many other available women who’d make interesting companions. I mean, experience a little variety first! Then, ya know if you still felt the same..."
To his credit, Lance kept his cool. "When you’ve found the one, Justin, you know it. You just KNOW it. I don’t need to go shopping around. The idea just makes me want to cringe. That would cheapen what I’ve done and felt. Mercedes is all I’ve ever wanted. I know this isn’t easy for you to accept. But, Justin...tough. If my friendship EVER meant ANYTHING to you, then we’ll put an end to this shit right now."
Justin gave Lance that smirk, and initially Lance thought Justin was just going to make another smart ass remark. "You’ll be keeping this marriage thing a secret, I gather."
The question kind of took Lance by surprise. "If someone asks me if I’m married, I will answer truthfully."
"But if no one gets wind of the nuptials, then you’ll still appear single."
"For the moment that’s the plan. It’ll give Mercedes and I...a chance at some privacy."
"I guess Mercedes must really love you. Not too many girls want to keep something like that a secret." Lance seemed to sense a softening in Justin. "You’re lucky to have found someone who loves you, more than loving what perks associating with you could mean to them."
"I’m confused, J. I thought you had a problem with this because of what it could do to the future success of the group."
Justin just looked at Lance. And in his eyes Lance sensed something rather sad. "But, that’s not really it. Is it."
Justin tried to give an air of ‘devil may care’, nonchalant attitude. "Man, you and Chris, you two think you can read me soooo well."
"Lance seems to have found an angle, I never even suspected." Chris put his hand on the youngest guy’s shoulder. "It’s okay, Justin. We know that all that adulation has to be intimidating sometimes. But, you WILL know it when you’ve found someone who’s more into YOU than who you are."
Lance sat down on the make-up table next to Justin. "I know that you have lots more ahead of you Justin. I personally believe that out of all of us you and J.C. will probably be sex Gods to even the next generation of music lovers everywhere. You’ve got a lot of miles to cover yet. I never cared about that. It fell into my lap. Although I’m enjoying the ride and I really do appreciate this moment of fame...I’m eventually going to lead a fairly normal life. Maybe manage some music acts, but something out of the direct spot light. That’s the only way for me to have what I really want out of life, being a Dad, waking up every morning next to Mercedes. Corny?"
Justin shook his head, "No."
"I know you Justin. THIS is what you’ve always wanted. THIS is what fuels you. The other is just gonna have to wait. And it WILL be there, when you’re ready for it." Lance and Justin share a nod. "You know it."
Chris give Lance the evil eye, "And WHAT I can’t be a SEX GOD, too?" Chris said humorously.
The dressing room was filled with laughter. It felt good.
