Mercedes spied Wes waiting for her as she walked out of the tunnel which led from the airplane to the terminal. He smiled at her. Mercedes gave the big guy a hug.
"Somebody’s pretty anxious to see you!" Wes said with a jolly grin. He walked her to the waiting car.
The closer she got the quicker her steps. Her heart racing. The driver opened her door, and she saw Lance’s right hand and arm beckoning her. Mercedes practically jumped into the car, and Lance pulled her into his arms.
There were no words. Just the sound of happiness. Some gleeful giggles, and the noise of fabric ruffling against fabric. Sometimes the sound that lovers make as they embrace after an absence is like the noise a person makes eating a delicious meal. "mmmm" They are filled with the wonderful aroma of the other’s scent, the warmth of their long anticipated embrace, and the taste of their precious kisses.
Lance spoke first, taking a breath in between kisses, "I missed you!"
As soon as the driver returned with Mercedes luggage, the car headed out towards the hotel.
Mike was alerted when the car arrived, and it’s occupants left off at the back door, where deliveries were usually made. Lance and Mercedes held onto one another as they rode the service elevator up to the ninth floor.
Wes was beside them every step of the way, and Mike met them as they got off the elevator. The humorous remark Lance wanted to make about getting stuck in elevators waited until they were behind closed doors in their hotel room.
And as he said it, Lance kissed her neck and grabbed her tush. They both felt lightheaded and giddy.
Suddenly, Lance straightened up. "Mercedes? Could you be pregnant?"
Mercedes looked in his beautiful green eyes, and saw in them a look that couldn’t be described as anything other than...hopeful. Lance wore a smile, Mercedes couldn’t detect any fear or apprehension. This almost puzzled her, even though Mercedes believed Lance would be happy about it. She never thought that he’d actually hope it was true.
Mercedes almost wished she had some good news for him. "The thought had crossed my mind." Mercedes began. Lance’s eyes grew large, as if he was a kid who saw his first Christmas tree.
"Baby, you mean it’s really possible? We’ve got to get one of those kits, like First ‘something‘..."
"First Response. I tried a similar brand."
Lance looked at her. "I took the pregnancy test..." she repeated.
"AND?" Lance held her and he held his breath. Mercedes shook her head, ‘no’.
"No?" Lance asked. "Are you sure?" It was so funny, he seemed so disappointed!?
"Yes, I’m not pregnant."
"Well, when did you do the test?"
"Two days ago."
"Do you still have the same symptoms?" Lance asked. "You know like the presence of some things like morning sickness and the absence of another ‘thing‘...you know."
Mercedes smiled, "Yes, I know. Everything’s the same as it was. I still feel really tired during the afternoon, queasy in the morning and I still haven’t gotten...that ‘thing‘...since May 6th."
Lance put his forehead to hers, "I just know we’re having a baby. I can’t imagine why I didn’t think of it sooner." Lance smiled. "God must really love us. For Him to be so good to us."
"Now, be...we don’t know anything except that the first test was negative." Mercedes started to give him a puzzled smile, "You’d be HAPPY? about THIS?"
Lance squeezed her, "It may not be the ideal time, but a BABY?! Mercedes that’s the icing on the cake for me." Lance leaned back to see her face, "Now, who can we ask to go get us another test?"
"Lance Bass, we will not share this...possibility...with anyone else."
"Well, how else are we going to know for sure?"
"I’ll see Dr. Westfall on the 30th. We’ll know for sure then."
Lance looked at her, "And I am suppose to wait until THEN?"
Mercedes shyly smiles, "If you’re a real good boy, maybe Meredith’s housekeeper will get us a kit tomorrow."
Lance smacked his head, "MAN. Tomorrow! (pause) Tomorrow! I knew there was something special happening this week..." He leaned in, laughed and kissed her lips. "Baby, how blessed can a man be?"
Lance leaned over Mercedes and grabbed a hotel pen off the night stand. As she laid there half asleep, napping the early afternoon away, Lance gently lifted the bottom of her t-shirt. Mercedes yawned and stretched.
"No, no keep still, lover, or else you’ll ruin my drawing." Lance held her hips down in place.
"That tickles, Be."
When he finished, Lance kissed her abdomen. There was a tiny heart with a smiley face inside. Mercedes just grinned at him. "My heart sunk when the pregnancy test came out negative, Lance. But, we shouldn’t feel this way. It’d be better if I weren’t pregnant..."
Lance put his finger to her lips, "Shhh!" Then he replaced his finger with his lips, kissing her gently. He put his cheek to her tummy, "The baby will hear you."
They laid that way for another hour before Lance got the phone call to get ready to leave for the sound check. Lance’s cheek against her abdomen, his arm around her waist and Mercedes caressing Lance’s head.
Mercedes felt almost dream-like. One minute the phone rang, the next Lance had gotten changed to leave for the sound check. Lance sat beside her on the bed, "The car’s waiting, but I’ll see you at the venue in a few."
Lance leaned over and kissed her mouth, "God knows Baby, I love you so much." Mercedes hugged him. "You rest up now, Darlin‘." Lance’s eyebrows danced up and down expressively. "The next two days you and I are going to be VERY active..." Mercedes giggled sleepily.
There was a car waiting to take her and Dani to the Stadium. There were at least as many people there as Mercedes had seen at the Rose Bowl. MAN, that was a lot of people. There were a lot of people driving into the underground garage when they drove up to the gate. And easily a hundred fans waiting at that gate for a glimpse.
"Gotta wait a sec." A Stadium Security Guard said, "The buses are all backing up to face around the other way for after the show." Mike wasn’t happy that they would be sitting there for a while. These car windows weren’t tinted. And Dani was very recognizable to the fans by now.
"Hey Dani!" It started. Flashes of light from cameras. "Say ‘hi’ to Chris for us."
"We love the guys. We love the guys!"
"Don’t look right at them when they yell something to you. It’s not a good idea for them to think they have any connection with you. Anything can be misconstrued in a warped mind." Mike tried to give them some helpful hints.
"Don’t you look kind of conceited if you do that?" asked Mercedes.
"Better conceited than a victim."
Mercedes took a really good look at these girls, holding signs that said, "I want LANCE in my PANTS!" or "LANCE is HOT, HOT, HOT!"
Some of them were wearing next to nothing. Low cut tank tops, halter tops, next to nothing tops. There was one girl that Mercedes was sure was going to fall out of her top any minute. Were they thinking that it would grab the guys’ attention? How could any red blooded young guy NOT notice? All of a sudden, Mercedes felt insecure. It wasn’t logical, of course. These ‘wanna bees’ who were 15 going on 25. But, the determination and adulation were so sexual in nature.
They travel any distance to get within a mile of Lance and the rest of the guys in this stadium. Mercedes could only imagine what they’d do to get into his dressing room...or into his bed. What does Lance think about all this? Could he ever be tempted? Mercedes rolled her head to one side. She knew she shouldn’t be messing her head up thinking this way. She told her brain to ’STOP IT’!
"That’s the lady in the MTV picture! OH MY GOD, that’s the ho that kissed Lance at MTV!!"
There were some screamers. And someone hit the car with a sign. Mike got on the walkie-talkie. "We’re coming in. It’s getting a little nasty out here."
"I HATE YOU!"
"You’re too old for Lance!!"
"YOU BITCH!!"
Dani took a hold of Mercedes’ hand, "They say all kinds of things. Some nights they say mean things to me. Other nights, everybody’s really sweet like I’m their older sister. Try not to let it bother you."
Mercedes looked at her as the car drove down into the underground garage. She didn’t want to, but Mercedes started to cry. ’Damn, I hate myself for crying like this!’
As soon as the car stopped, Wes and Lance came to the stage door. When Lance noticed Mercedes’ face was tear stained and Dani was holding her hand, he rushed to the car door.
"Darlin’ what happened?" he asked.
"It was nothing, really." Mercedes said with embarrassment.
"Mike?" Lance asked him.
"Some kids recognized her and shouted some obscenities." Mike said. "Now, you know why you never go out without Security."
"Lance, they hit the car and it scared her." Dani offered.
"Baby, it’s okay now." Lance put his arm around her. Out of the corner of Mercedes’ eye, she could see plenty of young women mulling around backstage. Whether they were there as part of someone else’s entourage, or they had been selected to dance on stage for "Just Got Paid" Mercedes didn’t know. More than one looked at Mercedes with a hefty mix of jealousy and contempt. ‘They hate me!’ she told herself. ‘They really hate me.’
Lance was dressed for the opening numbers, and he fiddled nervously with his shirt cuffs. Mercedes hadn’t said much since they went and sat in the Quiet Room before the show. Lance put his head in her curls. He breathed in.
"Nickel for your thoughts, Darlin’."
Mercedes shook her head, "You might get mad."
Lance smiled, "At you?" Lance chuckled, "I doubt it. I think you can trust that it would take a HUGE thing, which I can’t even imagine what it would be, to make me mad at YOU."
"I see their faces, Lance. They all want to get close to you, and the other guys. They’d do ANYTHING for you guys."
He tilted his head to look into her eyes. "And...what? Does that automatically mean I’d LET them do ANYTHING...I’m aware of what you’re saying Mercedes, but I don’t take them seriously. They don’t really want to...say, have sex with ME. They want sex with an image of someone they think they know. But, they don’t know ME. They don’t know J.C. or Chris or Joey or Justin either. It isn’t real, it’s their crush or fantasy. But, it isn’t real. It’s their safe little fantasy. They might THINK they want me, but I‘m not stupid enough to think they really want ME. Do you understand what it is I‘m trying to say, Darlin‘?"
Lance grinned mischievously, "I don’t know why they gotta go picking on little old me, but hey, that’s the breaks."
He puts his hand on her chin, lifts it, and kisses her lips. "Baby, when I make love with you. We touch SOULS. Nothing any one would offer me could ever compare to that. Please try not to let them bother you. They can’t touch us."
"Lance, they HATE me." Mercedes said quietly.
"Mercedes, they don’t hate you. They don’t know YOU either. I’m sure it’s pretty intimidating for you. There’s a lot of them and only one of you. But, they can’t hate you if they don’t know you. Believe me, baby, if they knew you as I do...they’d applaud your courage, your strength, your kindness and your spirit." Lance held her. "I’m a lucky man, Darlin’."
Mercedes smiled, and held him tightly. "Thank you, Be."
In the early morning hours of June 21, Mercedes and Lance dressed, left the hotel by the service entrance, and got into the car Wes had rented for them the evening before.
Upon reaching the courthouse in Loveland, Colorado, Lance pulled his Abercrombie & Fitch baseball cap over his head. He took Mercedes’ hand and they walked up the stairs. When they applied for their marriage license, Lance used his legal name of James Langsten Bass.
It was as simple as that. By 10:30 they were back on the road towards Victoria’s retreat in Breckenridge. It was a beautiful, sunny day. The sky was so blue with hardly any clouds. Lance drove; they had no security with them. He held her hand. They were on top of the world.
Something inside Lance was calling to him. It started when they were crossing over a bridge on the highway and they saw, on a billboard, a dinner cruise advertised. In the distance they could see sail boats and motor boats on the water. The nagging feeling inside him grew. The dreaded nightmare had all but disappeared. When he was with her, Lance never had the nightmare. And lately, since he was in the routine of talking on the cell phone with Mercedes 24/7, he rarely had more than a glimpse of that ferry boat.
Something inside of him was telling him that he was standing on top of the world and someone or something was bound and determined to push him and Mercedes off of this cliff into some vast dark abyss. He should find a Justice of the Peace, and get married. They should disappear alone together. Today. It scared Lance, because the feeling was so strong. All that was in him, KNEW, he should take Mercedes and RUN AWAY with her as far away as they could go! It was crazy! Inside of him, Lance was afraid that something bad was going to happen. But, how could THAT be?
Lance’s family was going to be meeting them within hours with their Minister and Mercedes’ Priest. They would be arriving today to share in Lance and Mercedes’ joy.
Could it be that he didn’t really WANT to get married? No, no that certainly wasn’t it. Whatever was eating him up inside was telling him to take Mercedes someplace else...to marry her someplace else. To take her away. To love and live with her until they were old and gray.
Was it because he wished the guys could’ve come? That would’ve been great, and he will miss them...but, no. He didn’t think THAT was it, either.
"Mercedes."
"What?"
Lance looked over at her. Would she think him nuts if he suggested they stop in the next town and nabbed a JP?
Actually, that would be risky. The plans as they were now, were practically fool proof. If there were no problems at Loveland, getting married at the retreat was going to be a snap. No press, maybe no one ever getting wind of it. They could keep this as their secret until the baby was born. All the months of blissful privacy. Lance changed his mind about asking her. He assured himself that he was being...foolish.
Lance smiled, "I love you, Mercedes."
