"Seduces Me" sung by Celine Dion
Everything that you are
Everything that you’ll be
Touches the current of love
So deep in me
Every sigh in the night
Every tear that you cry
Seduces me.
And all that I am
And all that I’ll be
Means nothing at all
If I can’t be with you
Your most innocent kiss
Or your sweetest caress
Seduces me.
Everything in this world, every voice in the night
Every little thing of beauty shining through in your eyes
And all that is you, has become a part of me too
Cause all you do seduces me.
I don’t care about tomorrow
I’ve given up on yesterday
Here and now is all that matters
Right here with you is where I’ll stay
If I should die tomorrow
I’d go down with a smile on my face
I thank God I’ve ever known you
I’d go down on my knees for the love we’ve made.
Mercedes laid awake in her bed. The moon that peeked in at her over the treetops and through the lace curtained windows was the same moon that had illuminated Lance’s handsome face when they laid together in Mississippi.
Dear God, have I done the right thing?
Mercedes thought she had been lonely and miserable when Liam died. But, even that was nothing like this. She looked at the ring she wore. The swans and the hearts, and she wondered what he must be going through. And knowing that any pain he might feel was all her fault, made her heart break.
Mercedes knew that being served with divorce papers must have been painful and confusing to him. It also must have generated a fair share of unwanted publicity. But, that was the point. Mercedes could be certain that her sister Victoria knew Lance would no longer have a claim on any life insurance policy should Mercedes die. Nor, under the terms of the divorce would either of them be seeking any monetary settlement. The papers she filed had specifically said so.
What about the baby? As long as she was far away from Victoria and Dr. Fitzpatrick, she needn’t fear for the baby’s life. Mercedes knew now that it wasn’t any abnormality of her own that caused the first miscarriage. She did have reason to believe that returning to the States might land her in jail, on an arson charge, or worse, back at Fall Brook under the direct threat of her sister and Dr. Fitzpatrick. That would be fatal to both her and the baby.
If Lance only knew that during these months she had not been taking serentil at all, but a placebo switched by Dr. Fitzpatrick in an effort to cause her to relapse.
Unbeknownst to Dr. Fitzpatrick, however, Dr. Westfall had finally realized that Mercedes had experienced the original bout of schizophrenia due to the medicine Liam had given her to cause the miscarriage. Then he prescribed serentil for her thinking she needed it to function normally, when in fact it caused her to exhibit the very symptoms the medicine was suppose to eliminate.
What it meant was that the baby she was carrying, the baby her and Lance had been so excited about, had every likelihood of being born healthy. Her joy would be complete if only she could share this news with him.
Mercedes knew that...at least for the moment...it was better that he didn‘t know. Lance thinking she had the abortion made him more believable to Victoria. And more willing to let her walk away from the marriage. If he only knew how desperately she longed to be held by him.
How much she loved him.
Gwen had noticed the hopelessness and despair her good friend had concerning any reconciliation with her husband. When she left on her trip to the States this week, Gwen was determined to find a way to see Lance Bass. And she was going to bring along the video tape of the sonogram. Mercedes needed him, and if he was half the man Mercedes painted him to be, then he would want to help her, be with her, and protect her and their baby from her sister.
Regardless of the risk.
The possibility existed though, that due to the confusion and hurt Mercedes filing for divorce had caused, Lance Bass may have turned off emotionally. Gwen just knew that getting in touch with him was something she had to try to do, even if Mercedes said she didn’t want her to.
"Yeah. Lance." He said, answering his cell phone and sitting up on the side of the bed. Lance rubbed his head and turned when he heard another person stretch and yawn beside him.
"Where the hell are you?" It was J.C.’s irate voice on the other end.
"I’m not really sure." Lance turned to the body in the bed and gave it a pat, "Where am I?"
The disheveled woman looked up at him from under the sheets.
"My apartment."
"I know, but where is that?" Lance asked.
"Homestead. A suburb of Pittsburgh." She put the sheet back over her head. "Ooo man, that sunlight is too bright."
"Homestead." Lance said contemplating whether or not he remembered how he got to her apartment.
"I HEARD. Why? You know we have a radio show this morning. How are you planning on getting there?"
"I’ll take a cab to the hotel. No sweat."
"You have approximately one hour."
"I’ll see you in 30 minutes." Lance clicked off the phone.
Lance started to collect his things. In the meantime, his hostess was slowly getting her eyes adjusted to the light. "Want some coffee?"
"No, I don‘t have time." Lance said in a voice slightly deeper this morning, perhaps a little hoarse from the late night party they were at. A little too much alcohol again; Lance had an awful hangover. "Some aspirin would help, though."
"Here." she said handing him the aspirin bottle and a glass of water. Then, she put her head on his shoulder. "Who’s Mercedes?"
Lance could feel the blood drain from his extremities because his heart stopped. "Who?"
"Mercedes, I think you said. You kept repeating her name. Is she another woman you met on the road?"
He smirked, "Yeah." Tying the shoelaces on his sneakers.
"Did you do stuff with her that you wouldn’t do with me?" The woman asked with a devilish grin.
"I don’t want to talk about her." Lance got up and dialed information to get the name of a cab company. They would be there within 15 minutes he was told. "If you can get me to downtown Pittsburgh within a half-hour it’ll be worth a $50.00 tip." Lance said to the dispatcher.
Lance stood at the door, "Hey, thanks for being here for me last night." He nervously threw up his hands. "I just really needed to hold and be held by someone."
"Listen, if you guys are still in town tonight and you want to get together again, you know where I live. It isn’t often I let someone stay. And I don’t think I’ve ever let someone stay and they didn’t have sex with me." She smiled.
Lance reached for her hand. "Don’t think I didn’t want to. I did."
"Is it this Mercedes person?"
Lance leaned his head against the door frame. "Some day maybe I‘ll be able to move on. But, having sex with someone else right now just isn’t the answer."
"Well, you keep on drinking the way you were last night and you may very well find yourself waking up a daddy."
Lance smiled meekly. His hand rubbed his temple and forehead.
"Every night I tell myself it’ll make me feel better and every morning I feel even worse." He chuckled. "I know that’s not very bright."
"I wanna kick myself for saying this, but are you sure this thing is over between you and Mercedes? You’re an adorable guy, there aren’t many sweethearts in this world...she can’t be THAT stupid if you fell for her."
"Yeah, it’s over." Lance had no facial expression. But, he leaned over and hugged this woman in the door way. "Thank you. You’ll never know how much, but it helped me get through another night. And I‘m grateful."
When Lance saw the look Chris gave him, he couldn’t help himself. It made him laugh. Chris and Dani were probably thinking that he had gone home with some strange woman and had sex in her apartment.
All of a sudden Lance was Justin’s ‘hero’ and at the same time he was suffering the wrath of Chris. Oh, and J.C. because he had to worry about him making the radio show. Oh, and let’s not forget Wes and Mike. The crap they’ll give him for leaving the bar without them...oh that isn’t going to be fun.
"Good Morning, Chris." Lance said with a knowing smile, "If you see J.C. tell him I’m in the shower."
"There’s a surprise waiting for you in your room." Chris said with a mischievous grin. "And I think you may not like it."
Lance was thinking, ‘Crap Wes and Mike were looking for me all night and they’re in the room all pissed off.’
But, it wasn’t the security detail.
"Stacey!?" Lance went over and gave her a hug. "What brings you to Pittsburgh?"
"You." She said, scanning her brother’s face. "Do you have any idea how long it’s been since any of us have spoken to you?"
Lance tossed his wallet on the bed, and started to go through his bag for something to put on after his shower. "Yeah. I’m running late right now, so I have to jump in the shower."
Stacey came over and touched his arm, "What’s happening? What’s going on?" Then the inevitable question, "Where’s Mercedes?"
Lance stood up and looked directly at his sister, "I can’t answer that."
"You can’t or you won’t?"
"I honestly can’t. I don’t know where she is. She’s filed for divorce."
Stacey shook her head, "No way. I heard that, but I didn’t believe it. I still don’t believe it. WHY? What‘s happened?"
"It’s complicated." Lance said pulling off his shirt. "And I certainly don’t have time to go into that right now."
"Where were you last night? I got to the hotel around nine and Tim Miller told me you and Joey went to some bar. Well, Joey came back HERE last night ALONE. You gave your security detail the slip and slept somewhere else last night." Stacey’s voice got progressively louder.
"I went to some woman’s apartment."
"Don’t you even know her name?" Stacey asked with genuine pain in her voice.
Lance started towards the bathroom. "I’m already late. I have to go take a shower and get dressed." He starts to close the bathroom door and then notices the totally bewildered look on Stacey’s face.
"You have NO IDEA what these past three weeks have been like for me so don’t come here and start passing judgment."
"No, that’s not why I’m here. We’ve all been so worried. Now, I can see we were worried with good reason. Go take your shower. I’m not leaving until you talk to me, though, no matter HOW LONG you make me wait." Stacey sat in the chair next to the bed and looked out the window at the incline across the river.
"Now, I left a list of phone numbers and specific people if you need anything."
"I’ll be fine Momma Gwen." Mercedes forced a smile, she really wasn’t looking forward to being alone in the house. But, Gwen shouldn’t be gone for more than a week.
Gwen had the video tape in her flight bag. She had also taken the bracelet Lance had especially made for Mercedes. Whatever it took to convince him that she really was a friend of Mercedes. Gwen knew Mercedes would eventually forgive her. At least, Gwen hoped she would.
"Will you be going to NYC with us for the kick-off for Challenge For Children II?" Dani asked Stacey on the tour bus.
"I don’t know. I need to talk with him, but he is avoiding the discussion we need to have. Do you know anything you can share with me?"
"Chris and I are at a loss. There was a lot of stuff that Liam did that Lance knew about but didn’t tell Mercedes. We figured that it was so overwhelming to her that she needed space and time to figure it all out. But, her filing for divorce just caught us all by surprise. You saw those two together, they were way into each other. It doesn‘t make sense that she would do that."
"Your brother is deeply hurt." Dani said.
(NYC the next day)
The guys climb out of the limo and walk across the sidewalk to Planet Hollywood amidst more than a few hollers and screams. New York fans were always the most outspoken. "Hey, Justin we hate the braids!" One girl said.
"Hey thanks." Justin smiled. "That’s okay, don’t worry about hurting my feelings or nothin‘." He said. Then he and Joey share a laugh.
Gwen waved the video tape in her hand, on her arm she wore Mercedes’ bracelet. "Lance!!" She felt pretty stupid. Here she was a woman almost Thirty surrounded by girls nearly half her age. But, Sadie was her best friend...and she needed to help her.
When she saw Lance for the first time in person, Gwen thought right away, ‘I see what she sees in him.’ There was a gentleness in him.
At the moment, though, he looked like he was distracted.
Lance couldn’t put Stacey off forever. Here it was well into the second day since he had found her waiting for him in his hotel room in Pittsburgh and he still hadn’t taken the time to sit down and talk with her. He was being more than just rude. This was his sister after all. But, Lance just couldn’t bring himself to reveal the whole sorted mess. Should he tell her about the abortion? The lies Liam fabricated in his files that he had hoped to use to keep *N SYNC from leaving Trans Con with? He knew once he got started it would all come pouring out and he wasn’t ready to deal with the fallout.
Mercedes, why did we have to come to this?
"Lance!!" Gwen yelled again. But, Lance didn’t hear her above the others. Gwen finally realized she should call out his nickname.
"BE!!" She yelled again. "BE!!"
By now, Lance was already inside the door. But, Chris had heard her. He scanned the crowd, "Mike, who said that?"
"Said what?"
"Be...that’s Mercedes’ nickname for Lance."
"You don’t think she’s here, do you?"
"Naw, I guess I’m hearing things." Chris kept walking. Gwen was able to squeeze a little closer to the rope, and her arm almost reached Chris. He immediately noticed the bracelet.
"Where’d you get this?" Chris demanded.
Gwen was amazed, she finally got one of them to pay attention! "My girlfriend, Mercedes McKenzie...Bass."
"Yeah, right. Chris, they sell those knock offs on Time’s Square. Don’t fall for this." Mike said. "You have to get inside."
"No, please wait. I’ve come a long way to make sure Lance is alright. My girlfriend is despondent, but she feels she did what she needed to do to keep him safe."
Chris is still staring at the bracelet. "If it’s one thing I’ve learned since hooking up with Dani, it’s how to tell good quality jewelry. I believe that this is the genuine article."
"Do you see that limo, there?"
"Duh." Gwen says.
Chris smiles, "Yep, you and I are going to get a long just fine. My girlfriend is in that car, you get in with her and give her all the info you can...I’ll make sure Lance listens later. Okay?"
"Thank you Chris. Mercedes said you and Dani were the best."
"Well, we’ve got a job to do. Let’s get started." Chris gave her a little shove towards the car and then followed Mike into Planet Hollywood.
Once inside, Chris met up with the rest of NSync planning the strategy for the Press Conference. The focus was Challenge For Children and Melinda had mapped everyone’s little speech ahead of time. There were people here from all over the country representing various children’s charities that received help through *N SYNC’s Challenge fund. Someone brought the guys water and sodas. Lance looked over the little speech Melinda had written for him to refresh his memory.
Suddenly, as his eyes roamed about the crowded room, he narrowed his eyes. It couldn’t possibly be who he thought it was. Lance put down his soda. Chris was deep in thought, he silently said a prayer that with the help of Mercedes’ friend they would be able to help Lance and his wife get past the pain and problems that separated them. But, J.C. noticed Lance’s gaze zero in on someone in the room.
"What’s up?" J.C. bumped him. "Who’re you looking at?"
"Never mind. It couldn’t be the man I think it is." Lance answered.
It wasn’t until the man noticed Lance and they stared each other down, that Lance was able to confirm his suspicions. "Dear God." Lance said stunned. "It IS him. (pause) Son of a Bitch."
J.C.’s eyebrows arched up at Lance’s use of swear words. "Must be someone you aren’t fond of."
Lance slowly moved away from the guys and into the room. He made his way over to Dr. Westfall’s table before J.C. could get a warning call out to Wes. "Wes, who’s Lance going to talk to?"
"Oh, man. This is NOT happening. This is NOT happening."
"What is it?" Chris asked.
"That man Lance is standing at his table, that’s the Doctor he punched out in Orlando."
"The butcher? Geeze." Chris said. "You better stand by. You’ll be hauling someone’s ass outta here soon."
"Good afternoon." Lance said graciously to everyone seated at Dr. Westfall’s table. They were so pleased to have a personal greeting from one of the guys.
Someone tried to make some small talk with Lance about how great it was to have been invited to the Press Conference. Lance listened attentively and said, "You’re welcome. We want to thank all of you for the work you do with children and that we hope our foundation can help each of your organizations fulfill their needs to get the job done."
"Dr Westfall, may I speak with you privately?" With some hesitation the doctor rises and follows Lance out of the room. Out of earshot, in an alcove, Lance says to him firmly, "You have no business being here. This is an organization to HELP children. All we have here, sir, are children who slipped through your bloody grasp. Parents who took a risk, who weren’t beaten and broken into submission but who believed that a chance at life was still better than no life at all. You will leave here, NOW. I will not allow either of us to ruin this fund raiser. You have no RIGHT to be here."
Dr. Westfall took a deep breath, "I’ve made some major mistakes in my life, young man." Lance couldn’t even look at him, he was so sure that tears might come to his eyes. "Volunteering for the local Birthright clinics in Orlando is my small way of trying to do penance for my previous sins. God has forgiven me."
The gentle green of Lance’s eyes turned red hot with anger. Seething, he struggled to remain in control. "I will NEVER forgive you."
Wes was standing only a few feet away by this time. "You okay, Lance?"
"I’M FINE." Lance said over his shoulder to Wes. Turning his attention back to the doctor he continued. "How DARE you bring God’s name into this. What you’ve done is unholy. My..." Lance cursed himself for choking up at this moment, "My wife was afraid and alone and you took advantage of her vulnerability. You MURDERED our child. Don’t tell me about the major mistakes you’ve made in your life. I know all about them. I have to live knowing you killed our baby, so get out of my sight."
Dr. Westfall straightened his tie, "Lance, you’re wrong about me."
Lance closed his eyes and shook his head slowly. "Should I ask to have you removed from this restaurant?"
"Your wife returned to my office..."
"I am NOT having this conversation with you! Are you attempting to tell me the bloody details of her abortion?"
Dr. Westfall took a hold of Lance’s arm. "She came for information only! I won’t lie to you, I WAS prepared to perform the abortion. I was going to go through with it even though I knew...I KNEW there was nothing wrong with your baby."
A tear fell down Lance’s cheek.
"I have been living for sometime with the threat of exposure from Mercedes’ sister. Victoria knows where all the skeletons are hidden in my past. I know I have to make things right. For my immortal soul."
"When your wife returned to my office, she was emotionally distraught, but still unwavering in her insistence that I NOT perform an abortion on her unborn child. All she wanted was to know the truth about her medication. To learn all she could about the miscarriage she had and her sister’s role in all of it. I had to admire her guts. Lance, I was ready to give her drugs in order to knock her out and perform the abortion against her will."
Lance pulled his arm away from the doctor. "Get the hell out of here."
"Not yet. Mercedes sister has some sort of vendetta against her. She teamed up with Liam and plotted the miscarriage last year. Victoria and Liam had also planned for it to kill Mercedes."
"Her SISTER. You expect me to believe THAT?" Lance said angrily.
"I warned Mercedes that Victoria would stop at nothing until your baby was dead and at the very least Mercedes was committed to Fall Brook again."
"Why would you try to mess with my head this way? My wife is divorcing me and our baby IS dead."
Dr. Westfall shook his head, "No, Lance, Mercedes was still pregnant when she left my office. And the baby she is carrying has not been touched with a drop of Serentil. Dr. Fitzpatrick has been giving her placebos for months now, hoping for a relapse. " Lance looked at Dr. Westfall with a puzzled look on his face, "Yes, he’s in on it too. Didn’t you see his picture in that NATIONAL ENQUIRER article? Taken at Liam’s funeral, in the foreground you giving Mercedes a hug at her husband’s grave. In the background, Victoria and Dr. Fitzpatrick planning out what their next move should be."
Lance leaned against the wall. "Why should I believe you?"
"Because, I’m not saying these things for your sake. I’m saying them for my own sake, and for your loving wife who left this country and filed for a divorce only to keep you and your baby safe. My wife once loved me that way, but I was greedy and stupid and I put my own pride before everything else. Money was more important than doing what was right. I killed her love for me. That night I saw how much Mercedes was willing to sacrifice for you and your baby. The thought of leaving you was heartbreaking for her. But, I made her see that the only way she could guarantee that Victoria wouldn’t try to eliminate your threat to her inheritance was to divorce you."
Lance put his hand over his heart. "You told her she should divorce me? What the hell?" Lance stepped closer to Dr. Westfall, "Why? I am her husband, if she was frightened or needed protection I should’ve been the first person for her to run to."
"Victoria had already tried to murder you the day of your wedding. The champagne? She knows about your heart condition. She’s capable of some terrible things. Mercedes had to file for divorce in order to keep you safe from her sister. It had to be a public break so Victoria would know you‘d never have a claim on their inheritance. But, I wasn‘t sure she‘d be able to go through with it the thought of hurting you was too much for her to bear."
Lance looked for a chair to ease down into. If his head was spinning now, he could only imagine how things must’ve been for Mercedes that day. As in a daze, Lance whispered. "She filed for divorce because she thought it would protect me. Not because she stopped loving me." He gasped, and put his hand over his eyes. Melinda was looking for Lance so that *N SYNC could begin the Press Conference. Lance stood up and gave Melinda a pleading look asking for just another minute. He turned to the Dr. and begged.
"Where is she? I have to go to her. Please tell me where she is."
"I didn’t want to know where she was going. I only told her to leave the country if she wanted to keep her baby. I also told her that Victoria was capable of almost anything when it came to getting what she wanted. I frightened her, I know, but not without just cause. I doubt she‘ll be very easy to find. And I doubt she‘ll ever contact you in fear of putting you and the baby at risk. I wish I COULD tell you, honestly I do."
