(Three weeks later)
When the Backstreet Boys returned to touring, Chrystelle was truly alone. As she sat at the kitchen table, staring at the salad that was sitting in front of her, she tried her hardest to convince herself that food wasn’t her enemy. Chrystelle picked up her fork and speared a couple leaves of lettuce. But no matter how hard she tried to force herself to eat it, she couldn’t. She dropped her fork with a clatter and put her head in her hands.
“I can do this. I can show them that I don’t have a problem.” She had to gain some weight, and she had to do it fast if she wanted to go on tour. Chrystelle sighed.
How out of control her life had gotten in the past year. That was the price to pay for fame, Chrystelle reasoned. If you wanted to make it, you had to be skinny or nobody would even consider your talent.
“Here goes nothing.” Chrystelle said, and shoved a forkful of salad into her mouth. After that first bite, it all came so easily. She finished off the salad in three minutes tops. When she finished, she tried to fight that urge to run to the bathroom. When the urge to throw up didn’t come, Chrystelle grinned.
“I did it.” Chrystelle said. And with that, Chrystelle was confident that she could beat this on her own.
*******************
Nick looked at The National Enquirer with complete and utter disgust. The headline read: POPSTAR’S SECRET REVEALED. It was an article about Chrystelle.
POPSTAR HIDES DEADLY SECRET
By Carli Richardson
Pop star Chrystelle Marin has been hiding a deadly secret from her closest friends, her family, and her fans. The twenty-year-old has been a bulimic since she came on the scene when she was nineteen. An avid fan was in a restaurant with the singer and followed her to the bathroom, where the star proceeded to throw up the contents of her $300 dinner. She then returned to the table and ordered dessert, which proves that she didn’t have an upset stomach. Fans who have been in places where Chrystelle has eaten say that this is the normal routine for the songstress. No word yet of any treatment programs the star has entered. Enquirer will keep you posted.
In a fit of anger, Nick threw his glass against the wall, where it shattered in hundreds of tiny pieces. It wasn’t fair. Chrystelle had a problem and magazines were exploiting it. It was the same way for AJ, Nick thought to himself. They don’t care about what this does to a person’s career. All they care about is getting their story.
“This is bullshit.” Nick said out loud. Chrystelle was fighting to find the courage to get the help that she needed and all the magazines could do was mock her. As Nick picked up the pieces of broken glass, one thought ran through his mind. Fame isn’t worth the price that some people pay.
*******************
Despite her hardest efforts, Chrystelle failed to gain more than ten pounds. Of course, ten pounds added on to her frail frame was a huge improvement. But no matter how hard she tried, she couldn’t keep the pounds on or go above ten pounds. Touring was taking it’s effect and she was exhausted, not herself. And she was without Nick.
For as long as she could remember, Nick had always been there for her through whatever hardships that she was going through. Now, for the first time, Nick wasn’t there. Chrystelle knew that it was to push her to get better but the truth was, without Nick by her side, Chrystelle didn’t want to get better.
Chrystelle slowly made her way outside to the patio, and sat down by the pool. The sun was setting, streaking the sky in shades on pink, indigo, bright blue, and orange red. Watching the sun set was one of the many things that Chrystelle took for granted. Her and Nick used to always watch the sun set, every night, then stay out late into the night, gazing at the stars. Nick had always talked about being a singer, making it professionally one day. Chrystelle had always known that he was going to be famous, because he had the voice of an angel.
“Sing me a song Nick.” Chrystelle whispered as her and Nick sat on the warm sand watching the sun set. Nick grinned goofily, and started softly singing to her. She closed her eyes as the smooth words comforted her, almost making her forget that he was leaving the next day.
“How was that?” Nick asked when he had finished. Chrystelle smiled still looking at the streaked sky.
“Amazing.” She looked down the ground, and grabbed his hand with hers. “I wish you would let me come with you.” Nick shook his head.
“I can’t let you give up your life here just because I want to be a singer. It wouldn’t be fair to you, Chrystelle.” Chrystelle leaned over and wrapped her arms around his neck, hearing his strong heartbeat as she rested her head on his chest.
“Nick! It’s time to come inside!” Chrystelle found tears springing to her eyes when she heard Jane’s voice. When she pulled away, she quickly pressed her lips to Nick’s. “Nickolas!” He looked at her, his deep blue eyes wide.
“I love you Chrystelle.” He turned and ran inside. Chrystelle turned back to the setting sun.
“I love you too Nick.”
Chrystelle had tears running down her cheeks as she realized that she had been in love with Nick long before either one had realized it. She looked at her reflection in the clear blue green water. The girl she was looking at was certainly not the girl who had grown up with Nick Carter. That girl had been full of life, vibrant, in love with life. The girl that Chrystelle had become was one who wasn’t happy with her surroundings, someone who didn’t have any confidence in herself. She walked inside and saw pictures so many pictures of herself. Her parents had a camera permanently attached to their hand when she had first started out. There were pictures of her performances, practices, photo shoots, and her very first award show. As she studied herself in that picture, Chrystelle realized that, while she wasn’t the thinnest girl, she was by no means fat. In accordance to her height, she had been just the right weight.
“I let two pricky photographers destroy my self esteem.” Chrystelle said out loud.
“And look what it did to you.” A voice behind her said. Chrystelle turned around, not really surprised to see her brother. Jeremy was leaning against the door frame, his arms crossed over her chest.
“I don’t know who I am anymore.” Chrystelle whispered as more tears built up and ran down her cheeks. Jeremy came over and enveloped her in a hug as she shook with sobs. He stroked her long blond hair as she sobbed, his heart breaking for the girl that society had destroyed. If those photographers hadn’t felt the need to put her down, Chrystelle wouldn’t be in the position that she was in. “I let them destroy me. I should have had confidence in my beauty and my self worth but I let them destroy me.” Jeremy shook his head.
“It wasn’t your fault. They had nothing better to do than tear down your self esteem. Chrystelle,” Jeremy paused. “You are the most beautiful girl, young woman, that I have ever known. You’re an amazing singer, wonderful person, and someone who should never be ashamed by how she looks.” Jeremy shrugged. “I’m not the only one who thinks that you’re beautiful, Chrys. You have your best friend, who’s known you for years and seen you at your worst, who thinks you are gorgeous. The fact that you fell in love with your best friend is an amazing thing. It means he loves you for who you really are. No stereotypes.”
“I’ve always been in love with him. I just don’t think we had the courage to try anything before now.” Jeremy nodded.
“Everyone always knew that you two would fall in love. The way you two acted around each other was almost magical. You were so comfortable around each other and were so loving with each other that you almost acted like a couple. I had friends who asked if you two were going out I don’t know how many times.” Jeremy grinned. “Everyone knew that you two loved each other long before you guys had any clue.” Chrystelle wiped her cheeks and sat down on the couch.
“I need help Jeremy.” She bowed her head. “I can’t do this on my own.” Jeremy put her arm around her shoulders, confident that his sister would be okay. She had taken that all important first step; admitting that she had a problem and that she needed help.
“We’ll get you help, Chrys.” He stroked her hair and nodded. “And you’re gonna be okay. I’ll make sure of it.”