Don't Fight It- 12

Rachel sat in the sound area with the guys' friends and family. Jon sat in her lap, smiling. Lynn sat next to her and chit chatted about the guys and how everything was going.

It was twenty minutes before the show and Rachel wanted to wish the guys good luck. "I'm going to go backstage and see how they're doing. You don't mind do
you?" She asked Lynn respectively.

"No! Not at all! Honey, I've talked your ear off enough. I'll find somebody else to bore to death!" Lynn winked at her and shooed her away.

"Hey Mike! Let me through?" Rachel shouted to him above the crew. He was guarding the front of the stage and surveying the crowd.

"Hold on a second Rachel. This girl says she's friends of you and Lance." He said referring to the girl standing before him. Rachel turned and looked and gulped in air. Her hands became instantly clammy; her knees shaky.

"Yeah, yeah. She knows us. She's not a friend of ours, but she knows us." Rachel nodded at Mike, refusing to look at Sierra. "Can...can you let me through please?" She asked, looking Sierra defiantly in the eyes.

"Rach! It's so good to see you!" Sierra threw her arms around her and squeezed her in a hug. Rachel awkwardly patted her back with one hand and the other arm hung limply at her side. "Can I come backstage to see you and Lance? Spend time together maybe?"

Rachel was hesitant. She didn't want to spend time with Sierra. She didn't want to talk to her. "Umm, there's only twenty minutes before the show..." She trailed off, looking at Mike for help. She didn't have it in her to be mean and hateful; she was still a little drained from being sick.

Mike looked at her, not noticing the look of help in her eyes. He didn't see Rachel's eyes begging him to say no. "I don't see any problem in it." He shrugged.

He took Rachel by the elbows and lifted her up and over the gate. He opened it for Sierra and she walked through. Rachel was close to Mike and he always protected her and looked over her when she was with the guys. Whenever she had to pass through a gate, he lifted her that way. He'd been doing it since she was 15.

They walked to the backstage area and Rachel prayed everybody would be able to keep their manners. They knew about the situation with Sierra and they had always shown their dislike for her in the open. "Guys, I'd like you to meet somebody Lance and I knew in the past - Sierra." She gestured toward Sierra with a mere wave of her hand.

"Hi! It's so good to meet you! I know all about you guys and I've followed your careers for like ever!" She cried, flipping her hair.

"My God. This used to be my best friend." Rachel thought to herself and rolled her eyes. The guys smirked at each other and looked over Rachel, making sure she was okay with Sierra being backstage.

The door next to them opened and closed and Lance walked out. "Here we go." Rachel mumbled under her breath.

"Lance. Sierra is - " Rachel was cut off.

"Eiiiiii!!! Lance, Baby!!!" Sierra ran towards him and flung herself in his arms. "I missed you so much sweetie!"

"Here." Rachel finished after she was cut off by Sierra's banshee scream. The guys had their ears plugged with their fingers, in an effort to drown out the piercing shrieks.

Lance wrenched himself out of Sierra's arms. "What is going on here? Why are you back here? Who let you back here?" He screamed at Sierra, his face drained of all color.

"Jeez! Aren't you happy to see me? Rachel let me." She batted her eyes at Rachel and smiled sweetly.

"Oh. I see." Lance turned and looked at Rachel, realization dawning on him. "Well. I'm glad you two could patch things up. However, we have to do a show in a little while. We go in this room and spend -"

He was cut off by Sierra. "I know, you spend quiet time together. The magazines say you call it *NSYNC time."

"Yeah, something like that." JC replied, rolling his eyes.

Lance's eyes never left Rachel's face as she stared at the ground. "So, it was nice seeing you again Sierra. Enjoy the show and don't come back too soon." With that, he turned and walked into the room.

The others turned and followed Lance. "Perry?" Rachel called to a stagehand wandering around backstage. "Could you take this woman to the seating area." He nodded his head and took Sierra by the elbow. "Thanks." She answered gratefully.

"Oh Rachel. Honey." Sierra said to Rachel before Perry could take her away. "Don't be jealous. I didn't mean for me to get the lovin' before you did." She grinned snidely and walked away.

"Yeah? Well, who's with him now? Who's still friends with him? In case you didn't notice, Sierra, he has nothing but contempt for you. You are nothing and were nothing but a fling to him." Rachel shot at Sierra, hate on her face. "One of these days, people are going to see your ugliness and your pity. I hope I'm there to see it. I hope people look at you the same way Lance and I do. With hate and pity. You're going to screw the wrong person's life up. You're going to hurt the wrong person. I'll be there to see it and I'll be there to see you in your misery." Rachel waved her away with her arm and turned towards the door.

"You two deserve each other, ya know that? You're both pitiful and pathetic." Sierra spat out while being led away.

Rachel took a deep shuddering breath and opened the door to the room where the guys were. She hit something with a thud and looked behind the door. Justin and Chris were laying on the ground. "Cute, guys. Real cute."

"That was awesome Rae! I'm so proud of you!" Justin shouted, throwing his arms around her. She smiled and hugged him back. Lance stood up from the couch and started to walk out of the room.

"Lance?" She questioned. "Are you angry?"

"Am I angry? Yes, I'm angry!" He roared at her. She jumped back, surprised by his anger. "What? Are you friends with her again?" He exploded.

"No! I was walking back here and she saw me. Mike let her through. So what if I am? What? It's okay for me to forgive you, but not her? Is that it?" She yelled back. She didn't understand why he was so angry with her.

"Why did you say those things to her outside there? Why can't you just leave the past alone?!" He asked firmly, his voice still angry.

It hit Rachel like a ton of bricks. She realized what Lance's problem was. He had seen Sierra, it meant he had to deal with the past. All of the issues and problems that had happened between Rachel and Lance. They were thrown in his face again. "Why can't you learn to live with the past?" Rachel asked quietly. "Why can't you leave it there?"

Lance glared at Rachel and turned his back on her. His shoulders slumped and he turned towards her. "You don't understand..." He trailed off.

"What? What don't I understand? That I was hurt by my two best friends? That the boy I was in love with had sex with my best friend? Behind my back? Dated her behind my back?" Rachel shouted, pointing at him. "But ya know what? I don't see that I boy I'm in love with anymore. I see the man who is my best friend. I see somebody who is so terrified of losing me and my friendship, he can't even think about the past. Because he knows it tears his best friend apart. He can't see me hurt. But I still see Sierra as the selfish little girl she was. She's still that. We're not anymore Lance. We've grown up; we've moved on from the past. She's still living in it." Tears gathered in her eyes and the guys stared at her in open admiration. It took a lot of her courage to speak to Lance that way and they were proud of her.

Lance silently and wordlessly stepped forward and gathered Rachel in his arms. "I'm so sorry Rae. I'm so sorry. I wish I could take it all back." He said, regret was in his voice.

"Uh, I lost my ear piece out in the hall. You guys help me find it." Joey said pointing at the three. They left the room and gave Rachel and Lance privacy.

She hugged him back and tightened her arms around him. She buried her face in his shoulder and sniffled. After a few minutes, she pulled away. "Never regret Lance. I don't. I'll never be sorry for what happened."

"Why?" Lance sniffled.

"Because it made us who we are today, what we are today. If things had happened differently this relationship wouldn't be the same. So, never be sorry." She smiled at him through her tears, forgiveness and happiness filling her heart for once. Not an ounce of regret or anger was there.

When he saw the forgiveness on her face, relief and love flooded his body. "I love you. You know that?" He gently kissed her lips. The kiss was quick and over soon, but it lasted long enough to make Rachel feel dizzy.

"I love you too." She replied shakily. He turned and walked out of the room. "He meant it just as a friendship kiss, Rachel. Don't go analyzing this; it's
nothing." She told herself, trying to convince her emotions.

"If it was a friendship kiss, then why am I shaking?" She looked down at her hands and noticed that her fingers quivered.

"Rachel, are you coming?" Chris stuck his head in the door.

"Yeah, yeah. I'll be right there." She leaned against the wall and took two deep breaths before joining the group backstage. She gave them good luck hugs and ran towards the sound area to see the show.

"What is happening to me?" She asked herself as she ran from the backstage to he front.

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