Sheila René: I'm happy to finally be talking to you.

Bif Naked: I'm so sorry to be running late. I have all these interviews booked and I'm still jet-lagged. I'm just getting back from our third visit to Italy. You can't get skim milk or raisin bran.

When is it going to be our turn to see you perform?

Where do you live?

Austin, Texas.

Cool, I was supposed to play there at the SXSW (South By Southwest) but we were double-booked and hanging out at an MTV Festival in Frankfort, Germany. I've been trying to play SXSW since I was in Gorilla Gorilla. it's hard to get in because it's so popular.

You're really into biking, I hear.

I love my BMX-GT, but it's been in my closet since I've been in Europe. I find that with every birthday that passes, my fear of gravity grows. I'm not as much of a show-off as I used to be.

Is your home base still Vancouver?

Yes, I'm still here. I love it here.

How old were you when you started writing poetry?

Oh, gosh. It's funny -- my mom kept my first poem I ever wrote about my dog, when she got her stitches out from being spayed. I was about seven.

It's always been in my upbringing. We were in performing art of some kind. We were always encouraged to be creative kids. We took piano lessons. I hated my piano teacher, Mrs. Davies, because she knocked our fingers on the keys. So we quit piano, but we stayed in ballet. We studied ballet for 12 or 13 years.

When you were brought over here to Kentucky by your adoptive parents, you already had a homemade family.

Oh, yeah. My Mom and Dad had picked up my older sister a year before me in India. They got me through their local church group and brought two of us over here. They had Heather in Minneapolis. My sisters and Mom still live in Winnipeg.

When you think about timing...

Oh, yeah, I've often thought that I would have been the only little white girl at the hospital in India. When they walked in to pick me up at the hospital they signed no paperwork. They were just handed the white baby because they were white. When he tells the story, anyone could have just come in and got me.

It's a wonderful story. I was recently hanging out with Evan Senfield with Biohazard, and he sends his love and his 800 number so you can call up and say hello.

Yes, he has a new baby, Samuel. That's very nice of you. I haven't talked to him in about a year now. When I met those guys I had told them I was in a band, and Billy lives with one of the guys in Life Of Agony, who we toured Europe with.

I mentioned that you had thanked them on your record, so he became eager to discuss your album. At the same time, I passed on a message from Peter Steele of Type O Negative.

Did you see him in Playgirl?

Nope, didn't see that one.

I saw him on the Jerry Springer show.

I've been pretty mixed up on the real release date on your album. I've had an advance since January.

It's been out in Canada since 1994, and then Europe in '95, and now May '96 in the U.S.

I bet a lot has changed with you these past few years.

The songs have evolved a lot since I recorded them. Subsequently, I think the live show winds up being better. I've been waiting to record a new record for over a year now. Because of the stagnated releases everywhere I haven't been able to block out the time.

I think the label was just trying to get you the best distribution they could.

I think so, too. We're planning on maybe September to go in and record.

I love "Everything." You have a laugh very much like Janis Joplin's at the end of the song.

Oh, really? I never knew that.

There's a lot of Janis in you. I love the fact that you're a straightforward woman, hiding nothing and writing about your life. Are they all biographical?

Yeah, they're pretty autobiographical.

"The Tell On You," especially.

That was a poem I had written when I was 14 years old. I finally got to put it to music. It's a "put it to rest" thing for me. It's back and forth for me. Sometimes I think it's a little too much like dirty laundry for everyone to see; but at the same time, sadly, I just know there are way too many girls who can relate to it. So I decided to put it on the record. That was the first single and video in Canada.

What's the most important piece of the puzzle, being a woman fronting her own band?

Humor, definitely. The first tour I ever did when I was about 18, we did on pocket change and slept in the van. I find that I prefer a van over a big bus anyway, because it keeps you focused on what's really important. I find when you get a group of guys on a tour bus, they start to whine about catering and I don't understand that. I used to have to eat at McDonald's, and now I still do -- by choice.

Is "Four Songs And A Poem" still available?

I don't know, but I hope so because there's a poem on there that I call My Satan Poem. I wrote it about a TV evangelist. He speaks in tongues. It was released on Plum Records with A&M distribution in Canada. I might have one at home that I'll send you.

I'm wondering if you've ever thought about the spoken-word thing? I love your "Gross Gross Man" tune on the album.

I do spoken word performances in Vancouver all the time.

I love that form of art. I used to read in front of a jazz band in the '50s.

That must have been great.

I played the "Gross Gross Man" cut for my roommate, who's somewhat of a redneck when it comes to women. "She's a good looking woman," he said, "who wouldn't want to look at her?"

(laughing) That's funny.

Which female artists do you admire today?

Toni Braxton. I love her to pieces. She's my favorite. Anita Baker epitomizes woman.

Baker is my '90s Billie Holiday. Now that was a tragic story.

I think it was a sign of the times.

How long will you be able to hang out in Vancouver?

Ten days, and then I have a couple of festivals in Canada. Then we're trying to get on a tour supporting another band, or maybe a club tour on the West coast in August.

What's that first line on "Make Like A Tree." What's that first line?

"That fuckin' suspense is killing me." That's our producer, John Dexter.

Tell me about that song.

Essentially, that song is about...I got in the habit during my early adulthood of living with boys I was dating because it was cheaper. I think I was still suffering from a Cinderella complex. "Oh, I really like you," and then we'd live together and I found myself slipping into these roles where I'd start being nurturing.

There was this one guy in a string of unhealthy relationships. I don't know how to put it politely, but he was an abusive drunk. As many times as I tried to leave or end it, I thought I couldn't. I didn't have the self-confidence, and also I was convinced that I lovvvvved him so much. Dr. Laura has a chapter in her book that's called "But I Love Him." I tried to get him to leave, but he wouldn't go and I couldn't go.

Everything is written from a male perspective, or from a bisexual.

It's written from a bisexual perspective, because there was this girl I fancied quite a lot who went out with this really dumb jock guy. It's also written from a male perspective. I just left it as "she" so that all the boys could sing the words. You're the first one to even mention that.

I like to try to figure out perspectives, and if it's a personal thing or just an observation. I really got personal on all your songs.

Oh, that's good. Thank you.

When did you get your first tattoo? I don't like to think of the pain.

I waited until I was 20 before I got one. It really doesn't hurt that much. Tattoos are like a spiritual movement recorded in skin.

I think it's just a ritual that's been around since day one. I think the stigma of tattoos has changed quite a bit.

I feel that way, too. The barrier has been broken down a little in the last five years.

What are your best writing conditions?

I cartoon everywhere. Those are my cartoons on the album. I start with a stick girl, and then I write as if she's speaking. She's a drawing of my inner child. I've put her on my t-shirts and stuff. I've written on napkins before. I just try to carry my sketch book with me, and I write in that.

Women in music are still faced with no respect. We haven't come very far yet.

No, we haven't. I just played a show in London where the security guards wouldn't let me backstage, because they thought I was there to blow the band.

How will we ever get around this block that men have? Nothing has changed.

I don't know. No, nothing has changed. They have to act somewhat respectful to us, because there are more female artists. They're starting to learn that they have to put on more of a facade and treat us better than the local crew, but deep down, I don't think it's changed a bit. I find the same thing with audiences. There will always be one guy at a show who yells, "Show us your tits!"

That "Gross Gross Man" is there every step of the way.

I think you have to have a good sense of humor, and it's true in every business that a woman is involved in. I think it might be worse in the entertainment biz.

Is "Never Alone" a song your wrote for yourself?

No, it's a song I wrote from my best friend, Jennifer. She and I went through our post-adolescent years together, drinking and having a good time. I went into music and she went into the sex industry and became a dancer. For as long as I was in a band, she was a stripper. I finally put out my own record around the same time Jennifer moved to Vancouver from Winnipeg. Now she's the head waitress at the most popular strip club.

Initially, I thought, "Okay, that's a step toward getting her out of the sex industry." It hasn't done her any good. She hasn't had the mindset that makes it just a good money job and makes her a strong woman. She's still emerged in it. I find there's more cocaine available to her now than there ever was. It's continually heartbreaking for me. It seems to me that her emotional growth has been stunted since the day she started dancing. I find myself dealing with her as if she's 16, even though she's 26.

I thought that maybe if I wrote a song for her that it would help, but it hasn't done a bit of good where she's concerned. I saw her yesterday, and we go out to lunch and she's a beautiful girl. She looks at her reflection in the window and decides she needs more lipstick and we won't be shopping after lunch. She'll go home.

Do you travel with a laptop so you can answer your e-mail?

I'm saving up for a Powerbook. When I finally got the e-mail address I was living with my former fiancee and he had four computers. I want to get a Website and put up other bands besides myself. There are two million bands out there today.

What advice would you give another lady who wants to get into the music biz?

Ummmm. Make sure you think everything is funny. See the humor in everything and never give up. Look at every day as a gift and never give up.

Thanks for your time. I've been looking forward to telling you how much I enjoy your music. E-mail me when you know you're coming through Austin.

Yeah. I'm glad you like it. I'll stay in touch.

--Interview conducted by Austin-based Sheila Rene