Here's my keys, I want you to take 'em I think I'm gonna need you to get back home Hold on to my hat, I don't wanna lose it I couldn't stand for something else to be gone I'm sure you know the reason I'm here cryin' I think you'll understand why Chorus Tonight, I'm the designated drinker I just lost the one that wrapped me around her finger I need to get to where I can't think of her So tonight, I'm the designated drinker I came here to get you to help me I need a friend to see me through I hated to call, I knew you wouldn't mind at all I know you know I'd do the same for you I'm not the kind that likes to drown my sorrow I may hate myself tomorrow Oh but... Chorus Tonight, I'm the designated drinker I just lost the one that wrapped me around her finger I need to get to where I can't think of her So tonight, I'm the designated drinker We need to get to where we can't think of her So tonight we're the designated drinkers Oh tonight, we're the designated drinkers