how do you catch a unique rabbit? -unique up on it
how do you catch a tame rabbit? -tame way, unique up on it
how do crazy people go through the forest? -they take the psycho path
how do you get holy water? -you boil the hell out of it
what did the fish say when he ran into the wall? -dam!!!
What do you call a fly with no wings? A walk
what do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? -a stick
what do you call cheese that isn't yours? -nacho cheese
what do you call santa's helpers? -subordinate clauses
what do you call four bullfighters in quicksand? -cuatro cinco
what do you get from a pampered cow? -spoiled milk
what do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire? -frostbite
what lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches? -a nervous wreck
what's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? -anyone can roast beef
where do you find a dog with no legs? -right where you left him
why do gorillas have big nostrils? -cuz they have big fingers
why don't blind people like to ski dive? -cuz it scares the dog
what's the difference between a bad golfer and a bad skydiver? -a bad golfer goes whack dang, and a bad skydiver goes dang wack
how are a texas tornado and a tennessee divorce the same? -either way somebody's going to lose a trailer
Why is it so hard for women to find men that are sensitive, caring,and good looking? -Because those men already have boyfriends.
What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter. He won't come when you call him anyway.
What would you call it when an Italian has one arm shorter than the other? -A speech impediment.
What do you call a girl with one leg shorter than the other? Eileen
What do you call a woman with one leg shorter than the other, married to a politician? Tipper
