It was a midday summer Sunday and the Jellicle cats were resting in the Junkyard. Suddenly two human girls wandered in from the outside world… somehow. The first girl, unfortunately, went into fictional stories often and that's why she was there. The other girl was just there because, well, she was friends with the first girl. Of course, they didn't know that at the time and they thought it was just a normal junkyard. Just then, the first girl noticed the cats. She screamed "Oh my God, it's human-cats!", a bright flash of light insured and everyone in the Junkyard dropped into a dead faint.
Demeter was one of the first cats to wake-up. She was stretching out when she realized that she didn't have claws... or paws... or fur anymore. She raced over to the reflective surface on a car bumper and realized something… interesting. "I'm a human!" All over the Junkyard former cats were making the same discovery.
Pouncival and Tumblebrutus had been closest to the place where the girls had entered the Junkyard and it was them who discovered the girls. Unlike the former cats, they weren't awake yet. "I wonder who this it?" Pouncival muttered, thinking they were just other former cats. Pouncival and Tumblebrutus picked up the girls and dragged them to where the others were meeting- trying to figure out what had happened. Pouncival figured that either Munkustrap or Mistoffelees would be able to figure out who the girls were.
"Neither of them are one of us." Munkustrap announced after looking over the two girls. "We all kind of look like ourselves and they don't look like anyone of us, so they're not one of us."
"If they're not one of us, who are they?"
"Why are they here?"
"What happened to us?"
There were lots of questions, but no answers. The former cats could only hope that the girls could give some when they woke up.
The original (formerly known as "first") girl was the first to wake-up and her friend woke just a few minutes later. When the original girl opened her eyes what she saw was a huge group of former cats staring down at her. "Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!" she shrieked. "The cat-humans are humans!"
The former cats exchanged glances. They were confused with these 'cat-humans' the girl talked about, but she seemed to somewhat understand what had happened. Munkustrap stepped forward to speak for the Jellicles. "Hello, I am Munkustrap, the new Jellicle leader. This is-" he gestured to Mistoffelees.
"Mistoffelees." The girl broke in. She gazed around at the other Jellicles. (They will be referred to as "Jellicles" rather then "former cats" from now on, since it's shorter.) "And that's Jellylorum and Bombalurina and Cassandra and Demeter and Electra and Etcetera and Jemima and Victoria and Jennyanydots and Rumpleteazer and Alonzo and Asparagus and Mungojerrie and Plato and Pouncival and Tumblebrutus and Skimbleshanks and Tantomile and Coricopat and that-" she pointed at the final Jellicle- "is Rum Tum Tugger."
"'Ey, 'ow do you know that?" Mungojerrie asked suspiciously, but the girl who had talked wasn't paying attention anymore. She was standing now- pacing back and forth nervously.
"Dear Lord, I seem to have gone into "Cats". And of course, I dragged someone else along with me. Should have known I couldn't keep it a secret forever. And of course, I get into trouble within what 5 seconds? Aw, I can't believe I turned them into humans by calling them 'human-cats'. Stupid, stupid girl. Besides, what was I thinking- 'human-cats'? Yulanda and I both knew what they were the second we saw them- we've seen the musical enough times. Well, I suppose I'll just have to fix it... somehow." At this point the girl noticed that all the Jellicles had heard her rant and were staring at her.
"So, anyway, um yes." The girl smiled nervously. "You're the Jellicle ca-er, humans, eh? Well, I'm Erin Delanci and that's Yulanda Tillons." Erin glanced over at Yulanda who was sitting on a box staring at something. "Aw, hang on a second. I shall return, former cats. Talk amongst yourselves."
Erin waited until the Jellices were- sort of- ignoring her and then walked over to Yulanda and sat on the box next to her. "Whatcha staring at, Yulanda?"
"Look..." Yulanda pointed. Erin followed her gaze, made a face of confusion and an 'and…' gesture. "It's Rum Tum Tugger," Yulanda explained.
Erin sighed and rolled her eyes. "I thought we were over that now, Yulanda."
"Over what?" Yulanda asked vaguely, never moving her gaze from Rum Tum Tugger.
"Well, remember when we first saw "Cats" and you thought he was a brat and then by the end of "Mr. Mistoffelees" we were both totally in love with him. And then we decided not to like him anymore because he was just a character in a play. Remember?" Erin shook her head at Yulanda.
"Well, yeah, but now I've met him and he's real and I can like him again." Yulanda finished with a nod of her head- as if she had just won a prize debate.
"Met him? Yulanda you saw him-from a distance- because the Jellicles waited for us to wake-up because we- actually I- turned them into humans. Yeah, that's certainly "meeting" him."
During Erin's "speech", Rum Tum Tugger had started to make his way over to the girls and now he was standing in front of them, almost posing. "Erin Delanci, eh? That's a pretty name," Tugger commented.
"Rum Tum Tugger, eh? That's an... interesting name," Erin retorted.
Tugger was taken aback. This was the first girl not to swoon at his feet. Although Yulanda still staring at him in silence. "Well, it's a cat name," he told her, rather huffily. "Besides, I was being serious."
"Well, I have a human name and you called it pretty. So, I called your name 'interesting'." Erin paused. "By the way, I was being serious too."
Tugger didn't seem to have a reply to that right away and Erin didn't wait to let him think of one. "Now, if you don't mind, Yulanda and I have some business to discuss." Tugger scowled at Erin and then walked away. Erin turned back to Yulanda, "Well, I've seen him, I've met him, I've talked to him and frankly, I'm not impressed. He's not all his hype makes him up to be."
"I can't believe you said that to him!" Yulanda exclaimed, finally coming out of her "Tugger watching trance".
"Can't believe I said what to him?" Erin asked, confused and yet not really caring.
"That he had an 'interesting' name!"
"Oh, well, it's true. Besides-" Erin broke off and leaning over to stare into Yulanda's face. "Yulanda- you've been taken in." Obviously, Yulanda had been sucked into the Rum Tum Tugger hype and Erin wasn't happy about that.
"Taken in by what?" Yulanda asked, although she didn't really care, since she had noticed Tugger again and was slipping back into the watching trance.
"Well, if you don't know I can't help you, since it's glaringly obvious." Erin shook her head. "Now, if you don't mind, I'm going to go find someone to talk to who isn't in love with Rum Tum Tugger. And isn't mad at me for turning them into humans." Yulanda just waved her hand and Erin stalked away angrily.
"Hey Erin?" A tentative voice asked.
After stalking away from Yulanda, Erin decided that before she associated with the Jellicles she needed some time to think. To figure out how to turn them back, why she was so against Tugger and why she was mad at Yulanda. By this time the answer to all three questions was "I don't know".
But at least now Erin was ready to talk to someone. She turned around to face the speaker- hoping it was Yulanda. It wasn't. It was Electra, followed by Etcetera, Jemima and Victoria. "Yes?" Erin replied politely.
"We need to talk to you." Electra told her. Erin nodded and the 4 girls sat down beside her. "You need to stay away from Rum Tum Tugger. He's ours."
Erin burst out laughing and then seeing the looks the girls gave her, decided to explain herself. "Don't worry. Rum Tum Tugger is the last thing on my mind. I suppose you haven't heard of our one and only encounter?"
"Your one and only... Oh! I know what she's talking about!" Victoria suddenly exclaimed. She leaned over to the other girls and relayed the story to them.
"Well, I guess we don't have to worry about you." Electra shrugged. "We're going to go talk to your friend now though."
Erin burst out laughing again. "Good luck." The girls just shrugged and started to walk away. Erin sat and watched them go when suddenly Jemima turned and ran back. "Hi. Why did you come back? Can I help you with anything?"
"Why don't you like Tugger?" Jemima asked bluntly, amazing Erin.
"Well, it's not that I don't like him, it's just that..." Erin thought for a minute, trying to think of a way to end that sentence. Preferably a way that wouldn't come back to haunt her in the future. "Okay- maybe I do dislike him. But that's just because he's incredibly conceited. He says to me what? Four words? And expects me to be totally in love with him?"
"That's because everyone else falls in love with him if he even looks at them," Jemima explained. "You’re the first girl to ever resist him- even Bombalurina falls all over him, although you can't always tell. Anyway, Tugger's going to be interested in the fact that you're not all over him and he's going to chase you. Rum Tum Tugger's going to fall in love with you, Erin Delanci."
Erin laughed. "I doubt it. But your pretty smart for someone who would still be a kitten if she were a cat, Jemima."
"Hey!" Jemima said, indignantly. "I doubt your any older then me. Besides, at the next Jellicle Ball I'm going to be considered an "adult" cat."
Erin looked at Jemima and then looked at her own reflection in a nearby car bumper. She laughed. "I guess I'm not that much older then you." Then she noticed Electra, Etcetera and Victoria following Tugger around. "It looks like your friends found Tugger. Why don't you go join them?" Jemima opened her mouth, probably to protest, so Erin quickly added, "I've got to think anyway."
"Think about what?" Jemima asked, although she did stand up as though she was preparing to leave.
"About stuff," Erin shrugged, although she knew it wouldn't pass for an answer. She decided to add, "Important stuff. Like, if I know how to turn you back into cats."
Jemima shrieked excitedly. "You might know how?" Erin just shrugged, for she really wasn't sure. "I'll leave you to think then!" And with that Jemima rushed off to join her friends.
Erin smiled and then closed her eyes and sat back to reflect on her current situation. She didn't have long to think because 15 minutes after Jemima left; someone else sat down beside her and said, "Wow, you must have some pretty powerful magic. Even I couldn't guess everyone's name when I first met them."
"Huh? What?" Erin opened her eyes to see Mistoffelees sitting next to her. "Oh, Mistoffelees, I don't have any magic. I just... knew..." She paused for a minute as Mistoffelees stared at her confused. "Okay, look, I'll tell you something if you promise not to tell anyone or think that I'm crazy."
Mistoffelees grinned. "I'm the "original conjuring cat'. There's nothing I'd find crazy. And I won' tell anyone either- unless you want me to. By the way, you can call me just Misto."
"Alright... Misto." Erin took a deep breath. "Well, you see, Yulanda and I come from some other dimension or something. And in that world, the Jellicle Ball where Grizabella went to the Heavyside Layer and Old Deuteronomy was kidnapped by Macavity, is a musical called "Cats". And me and Yulanda liked it and somehow we went into it- as you can see. Because there's this crazy magic man who always sends me into musicals and I think he's the one that turned you into humans."
Erin stopped and thought for a minute. "By the way, the musical is rather cool. Your character is too."
Misto thought quietly for a minute. "Hey, that was just the last Jellicle Ball!" Misto suddenly exclaimed. "What do you mean- my character is cool, though?"
"Well, you see, before you brought Old Deuteronomy back, Rum Tum Tugger sang this incredibly cool song about you, called "Magical Mr. Mistoffelees". And during Rum Tum Tugger's song you say 'Rum Tum Tugger is a terrible bore'." Erin burst out in delighted laughter; it had always been her favorite line in the play.
"Oh yeah, I remember him singing that song." Misto smiled happily at the memories of the Ball. "Yeah, I always say 'Rum Tum Tugger is a terrible bore' during his song. I mean, me and Tugger are best friends, but still-it can get pretty boring with all the kittens chasing him and him so high on himself."
Erin nodded. "I couldn't agree with you more." Then she digested the first part of that piece of information and her eyes opened wide. "You and Tugger are best friends? God, you two are the most unlikely pair of friends I could possible imagine."
Misto shrugged. "I know. That's probably why we're friends- complete opposites always are." Mist grinned suddenly, remembering something. "So, I heard of your Tugger encounter?"
Erin groaned and buried her face in her hands. "God, how fast does news travel in this tribe?" Then she remembered that Tugger was Misto's best friend and realized that Tugger had probably told him in person. "Yeah, he used what I consider to be a cheesy pick-up line on me and so I told him that he had an 'interesting' name. I have to say, considering his following I expected him to be, well... more."
"You know, Tugger's completely amazed that you brushed him off. He spent the past hour trying to figure out what he did wrong." Misto groaned. "All his life he's had girls chasing him and now he's going to chase you. And you know what?"
"What?" Erin asked, fully knowing what Misto planned to tell her.
"He's going to fall in love with you," Misto told her.
Erin sighed. "How many people are going to tell me that? Jemima just told me the same thing. I didn't believe her and I'm not going to believe you. Besides-"
Just then Erin was interrupted by a loud voice yelling, "Hey Misto!" Both Erin and Misto looked to see Tugger waving Misto over. Erin groaned and tried to hide behind Misto so that Tugger wouldn't see her and try to talk to her again.
"Well, I'm going to go see what he wants," Misto said, standing up. "Erin, think about what I said, okay? Because you know he's going to fall in love with you- you just don't want to admit it."
With that Misto went off to join Tugger, leaving Erin alone to shake her head at the "silly" cat. Well, that was just her opinion. Whether or not he really was silly was a whole different story. "I do not know it, Misto." Erin muttered and then settled back with her eyes closed to think again. This time no one interrupted her, but so much time had passed that it was now twilight and Erin soon fell asleep- not to wake-up that night, except for a few minutes when Misto and Tugger brought her a pillow they had found. (And at this time the audience collectively "Aw"s. By the way- when Erin woke up the next morning and remembered who brought her the pillow (Tugger) she gagged.)
"I feel soooo bad for turning them into humans." Erin told Yulanda, the next morning. Erin had immediately forgiven Yulanda for her airheadedness the last night and they had been carrying on the same conversation for the past hour.
"You didn't turn them into human on purpose." Yulanda replied automatically. She had been telling Erin the same thing for the past hour, and she hadn't seemed to notice. "You didn't know that the crazy magic guy would turn them into humans because of one innocent comment."
This conversation probably would have continued on for another hour except at that moment Rum Tum Tugger entered the Junkyard. Yulanda and all the queens immediately screamed and Erin crossed her arms and rolled her eyes. "Where's my theme song music?" Tugger suddenly asked looking around in confusion.
Erin burst out laughing. "He still thinks he gets a theme song?" She asked in amazement. "Doesn't he realize that generally humans don't get theme songs?"
Just then Tugger snapped his fingers and the familiar "Rum Tum Tugger" beginning music began filtering through the Junkyard. Erin was so amazed she practically screamed. "What the hell? Where is that music coming from?"
"Nobody knows," Misto suddenly said, sitting down beside her. "We never really thought to ask- we just accepted it. By the way, I was going to offer you something. Okay, I know that you're currently mad at Tugger and so I was wondering if you'd like to sing my line of 'The Rum Tum Tugger is a terrible bore' during his song?"
Erin sighed. "You don’t get it, do you Misto? You say that line in jest. I don't think I could ever say that line in jest. Come on! He still has a theme song!" Erin paused slightly and then grinned. "Actually, thanks, I'd love to."
Mistoffelees just shook his head at the crazy girl as she walked over to where the rest of the Jellicles were to wait for her cue. At the proper time Erin skipped up beside Tugger and sang out- very clearly- "Rum Tum Tugger is a terrible bore". Tugger continued on with his song but he stared at her with a hurt look in his eyes and didn't seem as "into" it for the rest of the song.
Erin walked slowly back to Misto. "I think I hurt him... I feel so bad." Then she suddenly giggled. "But oh, it was fun! But still- I do feel bad." Tugger's song ended then and Erin suddenly stood up. "If he still gets his theme song... I want a theme song too!" Erin announced.
"You want a theme song?" Yulanda asked, walking up beside her. "Why?"
"I don't know..." Erin said slowly. She just felt like rebelling against Tugger's theme song and having one of her own. She wasn't sure how that was rebelling- she would just pretend it was. "I just feel like having one."
"Well, what are you going to sing?" Yulanda asked happily, hoping she had discontinued Erin's hopes to have a theme song.
"I don't know." Erin shrugged. "I'll just snap my fingers and hope that the Crazy Magic Guy sends me something good." With that Erin snapped her fingers and music filtered through the Junkyard again. Erin listened to the first few notes and scowled up at the sky- where she figured the Crazy Magic Guy was. "On My Own! On My Own? You think that should be my theme song?"
Erin arched her eyebrow. "On My Own" from "Les Miserables" was her theme song? What type of a hint was that? God, even the Crazy Magic Guy was getting on her case about Tugger. "Okay, whatever. On My Own it is." Erin sighed then shrugged and began singing and dancing- slowly of course, nothing like the theme song she was rebelling against.
"And now I'm all alone again,
Nowhere to turn, no one to go to
Without a home, without a friend
Without a face to say hello to
And now the night is near
I can make believe he's here
Sometimes I walk alone at night
When everybody else is sleeping
I think of him and I'm happy
With the company I'm keeping
The city goes to bed
And I can live inside my head
On my own
Pretending he's beside me
All alone I walk with him till morning
Without him I feel his arms around me
And when I lose my way I close my eyes
And he has found me
In the rain the pavement shines like silver
All the lights are misty in the river
In the darkness, the trees are full of starlight
And all I see is him and me, forever and forever
And I know it's only in my mind
That I'm talking to myself and not to him
And although I know that he is blind
Still I say, there's a way for us
I love him
But when the night is over
He is gone
The river's just a river
Without him
The world around me changes
The trees are bare and everywhere
The streets are full of strangers
I love him
But every day I'm learning
All my life I've only been pretending
Without me
His world would go on turning
A world that's full of happiness
That I have never known
I love him
I love him
I love him
But only on my own."
The Jellices all stared at Erin. "That was really really good." Jemima told her. The other "kittens" poked her in the back and pushed her forward. "Um... we were wondering if you could help us dance like that? I mean, we would dance like that when we were cats, of course, but we lost grace when we turned to humans and we miss it."
"Oh, of course. It's really not that hard, I'll show you later today, okay?" The "kittens" nodded and skipped away.
As soon as they had left Tugger came up to Erin. "So, uh, was that about me?" He smiled, rather shyly- compared to his usual smile anyway.
"No," Erin retorted, sharply and simply. "Well, then who is it about? Misto?" Tugger asked, crossing his arms and pouting.
"No," Erin replied again, although this was more incredulous. "It's about Marius."
"Marius? Who's Marius?" Tugger asked, pressing the issue, much more then it needed to be pressed.
"A character in Les Miserables." Erin said sighing. "That's the musical that the song is from. You see? It's not about anyone in real life, least of all you."
"Fine then." Tugger replied, crossing his arms again and stalking away. He didn't understand what was with this girl's attitude.
When he was gone, Erin turned back to the sky. "Okay, that was pathetic, Mr. Crazy Magic Guy. Stop trying to give me hints. I don't care, I listen only to myself. Only to myself you hear? Anyway, I want a better theme song, okay? A real one."
Erin snapped her fingers again and another song started playing. Erin stared up at the sky again. "I Don't Know How to Love Him? What is with you Crazy Magic Guy? Is this your sap day or something? Many songs from musicals with lots of sap for Erin? I am NOT in love with The Rum Tum Tugger!" Erin suddenly shrieked at the sky. She looked around to see all of the Jellicles staring at her. "Oh dear, what have I said? Well, anyway, nothing to see here, my Jellicle friends. Just me- going on to sing another theme song since the former one was just a love song. Of course, this one is too, but I'm not going to push it, trying to find another one- with no love/sap." And with that Erin began singing and dancing again.
"I don't know how to love him.
What to do, how to move him.
I've been changed, yes really changed.
In these past few days, when I've seen myself,
I seem like someone else.
I don't know how to take this.
I don't see why he moves me.
He's a man. He's just a man.
And I've had so many men before,
In very many ways,
He's just one more.
Should I bring him down?
Should I scream and shout?
Should I speak of love,
Let my feelings out?
I never thought I'd come to this.
What's it all about?
Don't you think it's rather funny,
I should be in this position.
I'm the one who's always been
So calm, so cool, no lover's fool,
Running every show.
He scares me so.
I never thought I'd come to this.
What's it all about?
Yet, if he said he loved me,
I'd be lost. I'd be frightened.
I couldn't cope, just couldn't cope.
I'd turn my head. I'd back away.
I wouldn't want to know.
He scares me so.
I want him so.
I love him so."
Erin finished the song and walked off to the side of the Junkyard, grumbling. She sat down beside Misto. "Okay, as if that's not going to characterize me. Let's see, I sing two love songs as my theme songs and then I yell out "I do not love The Rum Tum Tugger". They all think I love Tugger!" She buried her face in her hands.
"So, you love Tugger, eh?" Misto asked her grinning. Then Erin looked up and glared at him in such a way that it would kill him if looks could. "Okay, okay, all jokes aside, I don't think that they all think that you love Tugger. Just most of them." Erin gave him another killer glare. "Okay, okay. Don't hurt me, human girl. You did sing very well, they were just all about, well, love."
"I know! That's the tragedy! Tragedy I tell you!" Erin wailed. "Anyway, I have an idea of how to make-up my little turning-cats-into-humans slip to Old Deuteronomy. But you must go while I attempt to figure it out." Erin made a little shoo gesture.
"Alright." Misto stood up and got ready to leave. "I guess that I'll go help Tugger "figure out" what he "did wrong" and explain to him why your songs weren't about him. I'm in for about another hour of whining." Misto groaned. "I'll see you later. Tell me what you decide, okay? Right afterward- so that I don't have to deal with Tugger's whining for long." With that as his final plea, Misto turned and walk away.
Erin grinned at Misto's rant and then sat down to sort out her thoughts. The "theme song" of On My Own had given her an idea. At the Jellicle Ball in the musical, the cats had put on a play for Old Deuteronomy, right? Well, that's what she was going to do. She would put on... um... Erin looked around the Junkyard for inspiration. Her gaze landed squarely on the backpack she had brought with her and she smiled. She would put on "Les Miserables". She walked over to her backpack and took out a pen and paper to cast the play.
"You've got to stop her, Munku! She's gone crazy!" Pouncival screamed, running up to Munkustrap and the other guy Jellicles. He was referring to Erin who was telling the younger Jellicles their roles in her production of "Les Miserables".
"What has she done that's so crazy, Pouncival?" Munkustrap asked tiredly. Pouncival was always over-reacting to everything, and besides, Munku wanted to know if he had gotten into Erin's play. (Yes, Munku is a real person, like the rest of us- not some unapproachable leader.)
"Okay, well, she's making me play Gavroche!" Pouncival screeched. The rest of the guys just stared at him, it didn't seem like a big deal to them. Pouncival sighed. "She's making me play the role on my knees!"
"And why is she doing that?" Misto asked curiously. He already knew his role, since Erin had told him right after she decided to do the play, but it was interesting to see who everyone else was playing and what their reactions were.
"Because, she says that I'm the closest thing we have to a little kid, but she's shorter then me, and she's playing my older sister. So I have to go on my knees to create the age difference," Pouncival explained.
"Why can't Jemima play the role? She's shorter then Erin." Alonzo suggested.
"I already asked Erin that." Pouncival sighed. "Jemima's already playing Cosette. And-" Pouncival added quickly before any of the guys could suggest the other ex-kittens "Victoria, Electra and Ecetera are already in something called "the female chorus". And besides, Erin says that she wants guys to play guy parts and girls to play girl parts."
The rest of the guys just rolled their eyes. "I'm sure she'll change her mind if you just ask her," Munkustrap told Pouncival.
"Hey, I'm playing that Marius guy that all the girl characters love right?" Tugger asked Pouncival suddenly.
"Uh... no." Pouncival said slowly. Tugger gave him a look that clearly said 'Well, who is?'. "Erin cast Mistoffelees in that part."
"What? Misto? Why did Erin cast Misto as that guy?" Tugger pouted. "Well, who am I playing, then?"
"I cast Misto because he's nice and shy and I made him sing for me and he has the proper voice." Erin said, walking up to the group of guys. "I didn't cast you as him, Tugger, because you're not shy. By the way, I cast you as Enjolras."
"Enjolras? That revolution leader guy?" Tugger asked, excitedly. "Does he love anyone? I mean, he sings that "Little Fall of Rain" song with Er-I mean, Eponine, right?" He nudged Erin.
"No." Erin scowled and walked to the other side of Mistoffelees, using him as a buffer. "No, that's not quite true. He loves a thing- not a person. He loves France and he is so obsessed with his cause that he doesn't have time to think of girls. By the way, it's Marius who sings "Little Fall of Rain" with Eponine."
"Oh." Tugger looked down. Then he thought of something else and his face brightened. "Well, does anyone love him?"
"I dunno." Erin shrugged. "Nobody right-out sing-out-my-love in the play does anyway. Why are you so obsessed with love, anyway?" Tugger just shrugged. Then Erin grinned and her eyes sparkled as she thought of something. "Grantaire might love him, you know."
"Ew, Erin!" Alonzo shouted. "I don't love Tugger. I don't want to play someone who loves Tugger. I don't want to play a drunk either," he added.
Erin rolled her eyes. "You don't really love Tugger or Enjolras- although they're the same person- it's just an odd Internet thing. Anyway, you have to play Grantaire because no one else is willing to say the word "agog". Why are you poking me?" Erin suddenly turned around to face Munkustrap who had been poking her shoulder for the past five minutes.
"Am I in your play for Old Deuteronomy?" Munkustrap asked, grinning. (I told you he was a real person/cat, did I not?)
Erin burst out laughing. He had poked her shoulder for five minutes just to ask her that? "Yeah, you have like the best part." She smiled at him. "I cast you as Valjean."
"Whoo hoo!" Munkustrap cheered. Everyone else just stared at him. "Well, come one, she cast me as the lead."
"Anyways, my little stars-to-be, I have to go announce roles to the rest of my cast. You guys talk amongst yourselves, whine about your roles- maybe even practice them!" Erin grinned and skipped off to find the rest of her cast.
"That girl has waaaay too much energy," Pouncival commented, as the guys/toms watched her skip off. "She has even more energy then Etcetera."
"Yeah, but it works on her," Tugger said, staring at the play where she had been. "It doesn't work on Etcetera. On her it's just annoying," he muttered as an afterthought.
"Oooo, Tugger like the human-girl," Tumblebrutus and Pouncival teased, although Pouncival called her "Erin" instead of "human-girl", since her knew her better.
"I do not!" Tugger protested, turning bright red. "What? I don't!" He looked at the guys/toms around him, all of whom were trying desperately to hold in laughter. "I- shut up!"
All the guys/toms burst out laughing and Tugger just scowled. Misto shook his head (even though he was laughing too) and led Tugger to the side.
"I know that you like Erin. You do like Erin, don't you?" Tugger nodded his head slowly. "Well, I bet you anything that Erin likes you." Tugger laughed sarcastically. "No, really, she does." Misto paused. "Now all I have to do is get her to realize it," he added quietly.
"You think?"
"I know."
"Die Pouncival! For the love of the play, die!" Erin yelled. It was a few days later and they were putting the finishing touches on the barricade scene. Soon it would just be endless rehearsing until it was perfect.
"I don't want to die! I don’t want a big death scene at least!" Pouncival whined. He, of course, was playing Gavroche and standing amongst the 'dead bodies' right before he gets 'shot' and 'dies'. The 'dead bodies', of course, were sitting up and groaning since they wanted to get this scene over with. "Why can't I have a simple death scene like Alonzo's character?"
Erin rolled her eyes. "Pouncival, you are one truly annoying boy."
Pouncival just grinned.
"And would you stop grinning at me like that in all the scenes we have together? Come on, I'm playing your sister!" Pouncival just continued grinning. Erin shook her head. "Anyways, Alonzo's character- Grantaire- does not have a "simple" death scene. No one in this whole play does. Some characters might not have their own song but they all have big death scenes. Haven't you seen Alonzo act out the big barricade death scene?" Pouncival thought that over for a minute then nodded. Erin smiled, satisfied. "Now, SING!"
"Whoa, okay. Don't go psycho on me, Erin." Pouncival walked back onstage and ran among the 'dead bodies'. "Look at me, I'm almost there!" Just then a 'gunshot' (courtesy of the Crazy Magic Guy) went off and 'hit' Pouncival/Gavroche, fatally wounding him. "Little people know... when little people fight..."
Erin watched the scene with growing elation. When it finally got to the point where Pouncival/Gavroche died and the turntable would have turned around to reveal the other side of the barricade, (the Crazy Magic Guy hadn't provided a turntable yet) she ran onstage and kissed the nearest possible tom/guy- Pouncival. "Pouncival, you did it! And you did great!"
Pouncival grinned shyly. "You kissed me. I really did do great, didn't I?"
"Yes, yes you di- Uh oh." Erin suddenly realized what the first thing Pouncival said was. "Um, Pouncival? You can't take that kiss to mean anything. It's just that I got really excited that you finally did it right, and I didn't think straight."
Pouncival shrugged and then smiled. "I won't expect it to mean anything. I knew that all along." Erin smiled and began to walk away. "Because you love Misto!" Pouncival yelled at her retreating back.
"I do not!" Erin retorted and then ran off to her co-director/Fantine, Yulanda. She sat down next to Yulanda and began to sulk. (Something she seemed to do rather well.) "Misto? Why'd he say Misto? What gave him that idea?"
"Gee, I can't imagine," Yulanda replied innocently. Erin gave her a look that clearly said 'tell me or I'll rip your heart out and do an Indian War Dance around it'. Yulanda shuddered at the thought and decided that it would be a smart idea to tell Erin. "Well, you see, all the Jellicles think that you and Misto like each other because you two got so close so fast, and your always together, and you go off by yourselves sometimes."
Erin scowled. "That's not true!" She sighed and decided to move onto a different topic. The whole Erin-Mistoffelees thing would work out in time. "Anyways, what scenes do we have left to work on?"
Yulanda looked down at a notebook that had all the scenes written in it. "We still have to do Every Day and... ooo... Little Fall of Rain."
Erin bit her lip and thought for a minute. "I guess we'll do Little Fall of Rain since we already have the barricade and all the students. And I told Jemima and her friends that they could have time off." She pointed to the ex-kittens who were practicing some of the dance steps she had taught them that morning. "So, I guess we'll have to go Little Fall of Rain."
Erin walked onstage and stood in front of the Jellicles- all of whom were congratulating Pouncival for finally getting his scene right. "Okay everybody, we're going to do Little Fall of Rain next. So, I'm going to climb over the Barricade and I want, um, Tumble to help me over the last part and he'll yell "He's safe" since I'm dressed up like a guy. And then I'll stumble down the barricade and Misto and I will sing our lines and then I'll fall into his arms- you better catch me, Misto- at 'Can't stand anymore' and my hat will fall off- so don't trip over it- and, then we'll go until just after Misto sings 'Will make the flowers' and we'll stage-kiss and then I'll die and then you guys sing the rest of your lines and then, like, carry me off stage like they do in the real stage play." She stopped and looked at the guys/toms wearily. "Can you guys lift me?"
Tugger burst out laughing. "Are you kidding?" Suddenly he ran forward, picked Erin up and swung her over his shoulder and started running around the stage.
"Ahhhhhhhhhhhh!' Erin screamed, squeezing her eyes shut and pounding on Tugger's back. "I'm going to die! Put me down!" She thought that she felt herself being put down so she opened her eyes.
It turns out that Erin was a little closer to the ground, now she was over Misto's shoulder. "Oh god, even Misto can lift me up. Oh well, at least I'm safer- Misto won't do anything crazy with me." Just then Misto began spinning and turning in the air. (His solo from the Mistoffelees song, of course.) Erin just continued screaming.
Finally, Yulanda (the O' Mighty Co-Director) stopped all this "madness" (In Erin's words). "Hey guys? I'm sorry to interrupt all your fun, but we've only got two scenes left, so let's just get it over with? Put Erin down and take your places." Yulanda shook her head at the insanity and then took her place onstage as the "Bullet Boy".
Erin grinned at the guys as she walked over to her place on the other side of the barricade. "Well, it was fun while it lasted," she called over the top and with that the scene began.
Finally, with Erin out of breath from singing laying down, Misto sang his second-to-last line "Will make the flowers..." and they both leaned toward each other (Erin up and Misto down) and they stage-kissed. Almost immediately, Yulanda stopped them.
"Okay, that was soooooo fake-looking. What were you two thinking- stage-kissing?" Yulanda rolled her eyes and sat down on the barricade. "I'm sorry but your going to have to actually kiss."
Erin and Misto nodded, although Erin muttered "That girl is totally abusing her co-director privileges," and Misto nodded in agreement to that too.
"Very good then. I'm glad you all agree with me." Yulanda clapped her hands to get everyone's attention. "Okay everybody, let's take it from Erin's 'Will make the flowers...' line. And I want to finish the scene this time."
Erin shrugged up at Mistoffelees from her position on the floor. Yulanda was really acting crazy. More crazy then usual. But it was time to forget that and focus on what she was doing. "Will make the flowers..."
"Will make the flowers..." Misto sang back.
Erin pretending she was on the brink of dying, she and Misto leaned toward each other and kissed- for real this time. And as it went on to Enjolras' part of the song they could hear Yulanda go "Awww, so cute," from her position on the stage. Mistoffelees and Erin rolled their eyes in sync.
Yulanda and Erin were sitting on the roof of one of the Junkyard cars. Everything was still 3 times the size of what it would normally be- some mistake on the part of the Crazy Magic Guy. It was helpful though- you could still go into shelter and stuff. "So..." Erin said.
"So..."
Just then Rumpleteazer skipped up to them with Mungojerrie following. "'Ello luvs," she greeted them. "Today wos a good rehearsal. Erin, you an' Misto look soooo cute togetha."
Erin sighed. Yulanda was right, all the Jellicles did think she and Mistoffelees liked each other. Ah, she'd better at least try to stop the rumor. "Well, thanks, Rumple, but there's nothing between Misto and me. We're just friends."
Rumpleteazer starting giggling and she and Mungojerrie began elbowing each other. "That's roight. Whateva you say, luv." Then Rumpleteazer noticed that Erin was rolling her eyes so she (Rumple) decided to change the subject. "So... me an' Mungo were wonderin' 'ow we can play your parents if we're tha same age as you?"
Erin grinned. "I'll explain that to you in a minute." She turned to Yulanda. "Okay, this could take me awhile. You don't have to stay and listen, since you know why I cast everyone."
"Okay. See you later everyone. I'm going to go find Misto and Tugger. Kissy-kissy Erin!" Yulanda grinned, slid off the car roof and ran off.
Erin shook her head. "That girl's crazy. You only say kissy-kissy if I'm the one who's leaving to find them." Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer burst out laughing. "Anyway, I cast you two as the Thenardiers because you're perfect for the roles. I mean, your mischievous and you have the proper accents. And we're going to give you a little bit of aging make-up to make you look old enough to play my parents."
"You know, that almost makes sense." Mungo smiled. "And, nobody'd believe this, but Oi'm kind of proud to play Thenardier. It's a good role. An' Oi'm playin' it wit' Rumple opposite to me too." He put his arm around Rumpleteazer.
Erin smiled. "Aw, that's cute. I told Yulanda they were mates, not brother-sister," she muttered under her breath.
Rumpleteazer leaned her head toward Erin, eagerly. "Okay, well, me an' Mungo, we thought tha' you loiked Misto. So, now tha' you don't... tell me about your real love life."
Erin thought that over for a minute and then decided that she could trust Rumpleteazer and Mungojerrie with the truth. She also leaned forward. "Okay, well..."
"`Ello luv," Erin said cheerily, skipping up to Yulanda.
Yulanda rolled her eyes and looked at her watch. "Erin, were you talking to Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer for these whole two hours?"
"Yeah," Erin replied. "`Ow could you tell?"
"You've picked up their accents."
"Oh. Oi 'ave, 'aven't Oi?" Erin quickly sang a scale. "I have, haven't I?" Erin repeated, grinning at the result. "There, that's better."
Yulanda stared in awe. "How does that work?" Erin shrugged. "Anyway, I have something to ask you. Do you swear on everything holy that there's nothing going on between you and Misto?"
"Of course there's not. Have I ever lied to you?" Yulanda shook her head and Erin smiled. Then her smile turned thoughtful. "Why?"
"Oh, no reason. Heh, heh, heh." Yulanda smiled shakily.
Erin shook her head. She had finally realized why Yulanda was acting so funny. "Yulanda, you don't like Tugger anymore, do you?" Yulanda shook her head slowly. "Yulanda, do you like Mistoffelees?" Yulanda nodded. Then both girls broke out in that happy-little screamy-laughter- you know the type. "Awwww, that's so great for you, Yulanda!"
"Yeah." Yulanda smiled. The smile abruptly turned into a frown. "But nothing will ever be able to happen between us. Because he likes you."
Erin groaned. First of all, Yulanda was being a ditz and secondly- would this rumor never go away? "Yulanda, there's nothing between me and Misto. He doesn't like me. And I certainly don't like him! Because I like Tugger!"
Yulanda grinned. "So, it's true, eh? This whole disliking Tugger thing was just an act?"
Erin shook her head. "No, at first I really did dislike him. But then when we began to work on the play, I started to have conversations with him, with just him. And I realized that he's more then just an image, he's actually pretty smart. And it just slowly crept up on me and I suddenly realized that I do like him."
Erin looked at her watch. "Yulanda, luv, I have to go see Misto. We're trying to figure out how to turn the Jellicles back into cats. I will cleverly drop some hints about you, okay?"
"Okay," Yulanda replied as Erin ran off into the demi-darkness. (Since it was now nighttime.) "I hope that girl knows what she's doing. She's going to get herself into a heap of trouble," she said quietly as she watched Misto and Erin go off into a second clearing.
Erin and Mistoffelees were sitting on the roof of a car in the second clearing of the Junkyard. This one was a little more secluded, not that it matter to either although it seemed that way to most of the Jellicles. Erin suddenly turned to Misto. "Misto, did you know that all the Jellicles think we like each other?"
"Yeah." Misto admitted. "Tugger told me. Who told you?"
"Yulanda."
"Oh. Hey... how does Yulanda know? I mean, Tugger knows because he was the one who originally noticed it, but Yulanda doesn't seem like someone to notice something like that. So how does Yulanda know?"
"Why because she's tapped into the source naturally." Erin laughed and pointed at Yulanda who they could just see gossiping with the ex-kittens. "So, um, what did you tell Tugger when he mentioned it to you?"
"The truth of course. That there's nothing between us. Why? What did you tell Yulanda?"
"The same thing. I've never lied to her." Erin turned to Misto again. "Mistoffelees- I've got to tell you something- even though I'm supposed to."
"I have something to tell you too- something I'm not supposed to tell you either," Misto replied.
They both burst out with it at the same time. "Yulanda/Tugger likes you!"
"You're sure it's me that she likes? Not Tugger?" Misto asked hopefully.
"Misto likes Yulanda. Misto likes Yulanda," Erin chanted, grinning. "Anyway- of course I'm sure. Considering I said 'Yulanda do you like Mistoffelees?' and she nodded- I'd take that as being sure."
"Good," Misto whispered to himself. Then he turned to Erin and smiled. "So, you like Tugger, huh?"
Erin buried her red face in her hands. "How did you know that?" Her voice was muffled because she refused to remove her head from her hands.
"I knew from the way your face lit up when I told you that he liked you. Misto took Erin's head out of her hands. "Hey- it'll be okay. We'll tell them our real feelings tomorrow, okay?"
Erin smiled slowly and nodded.
"You know, Yulanda really disliked our performance of Little Fall of Rain today. And I don't feel like having her yell at us again tomorrow. Do you want to practice it?" Misto offered, helping Erin stand up.
"Sure, why not?" Erin shrugged. "Um, why don't we go from the beginning of the scene- just after Tumble yells 'He's safe'?"
"Okay," Misto agreed, waiting for Erin to stumble off the car roof before singing his first line. "Good God, what are you doing? 'Ponine, have you no fear? Have you seen my beloved..."
The Rum Tum Tugger was looking for Erin. He had finally decided to tell Erin that he liked her. If she didn't feel the same way… he guessed that was okay- but he was beginning to think Misto was right. Erin hadn't been nearly as cold to him lately and they had had some conversations- real conversations.
Finally Tugger saw Erin's friend, Yulanda. "Hey, Yulanda! Do you know where Erin is?"
"Yeah, her and Misto are in that clearing over there." Yulanda pointed. "Why?" She arched her eyebrow.
"No reason."
"Oh."
"Well, I better go do… um… stuff now."
"Yeah, I have… stuff… to do too."
And so Yulanda and Tugger separated. Tugger went around the left side of the clearing and Yulanda walked to the right. They were both planning to tell Erin/Misto that they liked them.
"Will make the flowers..." Erin smiled up at Misto.
"Will make the flowers..." Misto sang back. They leaned toward each other and kissed- for real as they had at the earlier rehearsal.
If anyone had been looking down upon the Junkyard at that moment, they would have seen two figures moving away from the clearing. Yulanda running with tears in her eyes and Tugger stalking and punching things as he passed them.
They had both arrived just in time to see the "kiss" and left before they saw anything else. If they had stayed, they would have heard Misto sing the word "Grow..." and saw Erin jump up and say "Wow, that was our most realistic rehearsal ever!"
A month passed and it was time to put on the show. Yulanda/Tugger had slowly distanced themselves from Erin/Misto. Erin began hanging out with the ex-kittens, Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer. Mistoffelees made better friends with the other toms/guys of the Junkyard. And they continued to be friends with each other, never realizing that their friendship had caused the conflict in the first place.
The performance of "Les Miserables" went off almost perfectly. Enjolras was colder to Marius then he had ever been in any other performance and Fantine tried to trip Eponine during the curtain call. And when Erin stepped forward to tell Old Deuteronomy that this was an apology and she would do all she could to help turn the Jellicles back to cats, Yulanda gave the most sarcastic laugh ever to emit from her.
And the Jellicles held their breath, waiting for the "drama between these 4 young people to unfold". (As Jellylorum put it at the time.)
Erin stood on the roof of a car, staring up into the night sky. This was it, she was going to ask the Crazy Magic Guy to turn the Jellicles back into cats. "Okay, I've done enough damage, now it's time to fix it."
She continued looking at the sky and now spoke directly to it. "Mr. Crazy Magic Guy, you've got to turn them back. It's not fair to them. I know, your probably trying to teach me some type of lesson or something- like you did with Les Miserables- but this is going beyond me. These are other, real people your messing with and you can't keep them out of their real forms forever. Please, please, when I turn around, let them be back to that strange hybrid of humans and cats they were before."
Erin turned around with an elated look on her face and saw... a Junkyard full of humans. Her face crumpled and she sat down on the edge of the roof. "This is the end of it all. I'll never be able to fix it. What will they do now?" She burst into tears and just stayed on the roof crying for an hour.
Tugger stood, hidden by a pile of boxes, watching Erin cry. He wanted to go up and comfort her but he forced himself not to. She was Misto's now. Not his. He had waited too long. She'd never be his.
"So, is Tugger still not talking to you?" Erin asked Mistoffelees while doing some dance stretches.
"Would you stop doing that? It looks like it hurts. And yes," Misto replied. "Yulanda's not talking to you either, yet is she?"
"Nope." Erin stood up and pulled Misto into a standing position as well. "Come on. We're going to put an end to this madness. You go talk to Tugger and I'll talk to Yulanda."
Misto nodded and they ran off in difference directions. Erin stalked up to Yulanda. "Why aren't you talking to me?" Yulanda feigned innocence and Erin rolled her eyes. "Okay, I know that you're mad at me. Can't you just tell me why?"
"Because you lied to me!" Yulanda yelled glaring up at Erin.
"Okay, I speak for everyone when I say 'Huh'?" "You lied to me! You said there was nothing between you and Misto and then I found you kissing him. You lied to me!"
Erin was even more confused now. "Huh? When did you find me kissing Misto?"
"Like a month and a half ago! When you said that you were going to 'figure out how to turn the Jellicles back into cats'. Yeah right." Erin burst out laughing. "What? Stop laughing! It's not funny!"
"Yes it is!" Erin grinned but she stopped laughing. "I know exactly what your talking about. Misto and I were practicing Little Fall of Rain! Didn't you hear us singing?"
"No." Yulanda lowered her head. "I guess I was kind of over-reacting, huh?"
"No duh," Erin replied sharply. Then she smiled and hugged Yulanda. "Don't worry, I still love you, hon."
"Don't call me hon," Yulanda replied automatically. Behind them the sounds of a fight broke out and Yulanda's face brightened. "Wow, a fight! I've never been able to see one at school but I can see one here!"
Erin felt a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach as she realized she knew who was fighting. She turned around and saw she was right- Misto and Tugger. She ran up beside Jemima who was watching the fight. "Jemima, what happened?"
"I don't know. Misto went up to talk to Tugger and all of a sudden he jumped on Misto and they began fighting," Jemima replied.
"Oh, God, this is all my fault." Erin ran up to Tugger and Misto and tried to get between them- to get them to stop fighting. "You guys- stop. Stop it! This is just a huge misunderstanding... OW!!!!!" One of the guys (no one ever figured out who) had accidentally hit Erin across the cheek. Erin clapped her hand to her cheek and ran off.
"Erin!" Tugger called. He turned back to the Jellicles. "I'm going follow her!"
"Oh, no your not." Rumpleteazer intervened. "It's your fault she ran away- she was tryin' to tell you that it was just an misunderstandin' between you and Misto but you didn't listen. You think she's goin' to listen to either of ya now?" Rumpleteazer rolled her eyes. "Oi'll go after 'er." And with that she did.
"`Ey, Erin, luv? Where are ya?" Rumpleteazer called looking around the area that Erin had run off to.
"Over here." Erin called. She was sitting with her profile to Rumpleteazer on the roof of the car where she was so often found. "Did they send you after me, Rumple?"
"Course not, luv. Oi came because Oi wanted to. Are you alright?" Rumpleteazer asked, sitting beside Erin.
"No." Erin replied sharply. "This is all my fault Rumple. I turned them into humans in the first place and I couldn't stop the fight- the fight over me."
"Now, Erin, you know that's not true. This all 'appened for a reason- obviously ya were meant to meet Tugger. Ya both loike each otha. Now, just go back and tell 'im."
"I can't. Rumple- look at this." Erin turned the side of her face that she had been hiding toward Rumpleteazer. There was an angry red mark there that was already starting to turn purple and blue. "One of them hit me. I can't face them- I just can't. I know they didn't mean to- but still..."
"Erin, they feel awful 'bout it- ya can tell. Just go back an' tell Tugger the truth. You'll feel betta- Oi promise. Come on?" Rumpleteazer stood up and offered Erin a hand up.
"Alright.. but you better be right." Erin took Rumpleteazer's hand and stood up. "I hope on everything that your right."
"Erin!" Both Tugger and Misto ran to Erin as she entered the main clearing of the Junkyard. "Erin are you okay? I'm so sorry!" Tugger exclaimed, examining Erin's cheek.
"Of course I'm fine." Erin replied, pushing Tugger's hand off her face. "But you’re an idiot. You didn't need to fight Misto- considering there's nothing between us- and if you had listened to him all along you would have realized it."
Tugger scowled. "Did you just come back here to yell at me? Because I don't need to take that from... the girl I liked..."
"And that's where you’re the most idiotic." Erin smiled. "Because... you were the one I liked all along." She stood up on her tiptoes (since this girl was a head shorter then Tugger) and kissed him.
As they kissed a strange magical feeling covered the Junkyard and when the kiss finished instead of two humans it was two human-cats kissing. Erin looked around the Junkyard. "Hey- your all cats again!"
Etcetera giggled and pointed at Erin. "Erin- before you get too excited you should look at yourself."
Erin ran over to a car and looked at herself in the bumper. "Oh no! I'm a cat too. Mr. Crazy Magic Guy-" she turned to the sky, "I think you screwed up."
"No, I didn't," a voice in her head replied.
"What do you mean, no you didn't? Of course you did. I-" Erin looked around the Junkyard and saw a Yulanda-cat too, "and Yulanda are cats now too."
"Yes- and that's what you wanted, no? Now you and Yulanda can stay with the Jellicles... and Tugger and Misto."
"But what about our life back home?"
"Now you know that no time passes in your world when you're in a different one. Now you go back to the Jellicles and join them."
Erin suddenly realized something. "Hey- are you trying to tell me that you didn't turn the Jellicles into humans because I called them human-cats, it was so that Tugger and I, and Yulanda and Misto would get together?"
"Um, no. Of course not, heh heh heh. Now go back to the Jellicles Erin-cat."
"Alright," Erin replied. She walked back over to the Jellicles. "Well, it looks like Yulanda and I are human-cats for good now."
"Hey- who were you talking to when you were on the car?" Victoria asked.
"The Crazy Magic Guy." Erin shrugged. "By the way, the Crazy Magic Guy wants us to join the Jellicles."
"You have to take a test first," Munkustrap told them. "Come with me." Erin and Yulanda shrugged at each other and followed Munkustrap.
"Were you blind when you were born?" Munkustrap asked the two queens. They were standing in the second clearing and Munkustrap was attempting to give them the Jellicle Acceptance Test.
Yulanda and Erin looked at each other and rolled their eyes. "Not exactly. Munkustrap- we were born humans."
"Oh right. Well, this whole test is basically non- applicable then." Munkustrap shrugged. "Look you guys can join anyway, since we know everything about you as you've lived with us for a couple of months."
"Whoo hoo!" Erin and Yulanda cheered and then ran back into the main section of the Junkyard.
"So did you make it?" Tugger asked Erin.
"Yep. Because me and Yulanda whined about how the test didn't fit us and so he let us join and not have to take it."
"Okay... that made no sense. But you've joined at the perfect time. Just in time for the Jellicle Ball."
Erin stepped back and stared at Tugger. "The Jellicle Ball? Um... Yulanda and me aren't going to fit in there. We don't know any of the dances yet or anything..."
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