(Murder, Murder! plays in the background)
Narrator:
You want to see Phantom of the Opera, but Phantom is sold out
You want to see Les Misérables, but you can’t pronounce the title
Then see the show that’s not quite as good but is just as long and dimly lit – see Jekyll & Hyde!
Starring America’s biggest new singing star, Linda Eder.
Girl: ...Who?
(No One Knows Who I Am)
Lucy/Linda Eder:
Nobody seems to know who I am
And you won’t give a damn
I sing like Streisand, it’s true I do
Still you say Linda... who?
(Alternating This is the Moment and Murder, Murder! in the background)
Narrator:
Bob Cuciolli is Jekyll and Hyde...
By day, he was a noble doctor, searching for the cure that would set men’s hearts free.
By night, he performed in a trashy musical murder mystery!
By day, he dressed in debonair suits by Armani.
By night, he murdered naughty girls who deserved it! By day, he drank tea and listened to Bach.
By night, he wore a greasy wig that frightened girls in Trenton, New Jersey!
(This is the Moment)
Jekyll/Hyde:
This is my moment!
No, it’s mine, you stupid idiot!
Now I’m a star!
A star from Star Search for that song!
When I start screaming, steaming, and creaming, I’ll go-
Far as I can tell, we’ll both be out of a job in a week!
This is my key change!
I’ll do one too! (howls like a werewolf)
I’ll do it higher! Any note you can sing... I can sing higher.
(Anything You Can Do, I Can Do Better)
I can sing any note higher than you!
No you can’t, can’t, can’t!
Yes I can, can, can!
(Both) Yes I caaaaan!
Narrator:
See Jekyll and Hyde!
Perfect for people who find Andrew Lloyd Webber’s music too challenging. Jekyll and Hyde!
It’s Phantom-light!