For
all the people who wanted a sequel to the first bit. Thanks for your feedback,
and I hope you like this part.
***
"No.
*No*. I won't do it."
Xander looked down at his fiancée, sitting on the edge of their bed with her
hands folded primly in her lap, a wide-eyed look of patient expectance on her
face.
"No way, An. I'll go along with any decisions you make. Music, suits,
little cherubs that piddle champagne...but I draw the line here. This is the
point of uncompromised line drawing."
Anya waited until he finished, then untied her robe and shrugged it off. "I
wore a new nightie for you tonight." she said, smiling. "And there are
matching panties. Would you like to see?"
Xander's jaw worked. He swallowed, tilting his head to the side. "This
isn't fighting fair, Anya." he complained, his voice cracking.
"Look at the gesture I'm going to make with Willow. This is very much the
same."
"Only different, on account of how Willow was never my homicidal
bloodsucking mortal enemy who wanted to kill me."
"Things are different now. He helps, and you play pool together. And
sometimes you win money from him, and buy me flowers and presents, and make me
feel all princess-like, and then we have lots of nice sex, which I know you
enjoy, and..." She sighed. "Xander, I would appreciate it if you do
this." she concluded earnestly.
He stared at her, mentally scratching out the uncompromising line. "All
right, An. I'll do it."
She hopped up off the bed with a delighted giggle, flinging her arms around his
neck and sprinkling him with kisses. "Thank you. I love you."
Xander smiled and wrapped his arms around Anya's waist. "I love you too,
babe."
"Besides," Anya added between kisses, "it's not as if you have
that many male friends."
"Well, now--"
"Giles will be giving me away, so he already has a duty."
"Sure, but--"
"You're not that close to your cousin Eddie. And he has that funny
eye..."
"Anya?"
"Yes?"
"I'd like to see the matching panties now."
"Oh. Of course."
The bedsprings squeaked, and another giggle drifted up into the room.
***
***
Buffy pushed Willow and Tara's front door open and walked in, heaving a big
sigh. "Honey, I'm home," she announced herself.
"Hey, Buffy!" Willow's voice called from the kitchenette of the tiny
apartment.
Tara looked up from the book she was engrossed in. "You look beat. Tough
pat-patrol?"
Buffy tossed Mr. Pointy onto the coffee table and flopped down on the couch
beside the blonde witch. "Evidently tonight was the Annual Undead
Walk-a-Thon in Sunnydale. We must have dusted over a dozen." She thumped
her chest, raising a little cloud of dust for emphasis, and groaned. "May
my new suede jacket rest in peace."
"Dunno what you're whining about," Spike said, walking, or more
accurately *limping*, in after her and closing the door. "I'm the one got
my bloody foot nearly torn off my body." He sat down on Tara's other side,
and she scooched to make room for him on the small sofa. "How goes the
hocus pocus, dove?"
Tara smiled. "N-not bad. W-we're still trying to tweak the, um, LBS."
Spike arched an eyebrow. "Is that code for some kind of naughty girlie
bedroom thing?"
Tara flushed bright pink, and Buffy reached past her to whack Spike in the face
with a throw pillow. "You're a pig." she said.
"LBS would stand for little ball of sunshine, Mr. Clever Fangs,"
Willow informed the vampire, leaning around the divider wall holding a dish
towel and a glass and wearing a smirk.
"Oh, well that's terribly boring, isn't it?" Spike replied.
"Yeah, but that one's free. The girlie bedroom code will cost ya."
Tara said quickly, peeking slyly out from beneath the curtain of her hair at
him. Spike's blue eyes widened, and Willow burst out laughing, disappearing back
into the kitchen. Tara ducked her head, but her shoulders were shaking with
silent laughter.
"Wow, Tara, you've rendered him speechless. You *must* be packing some
powerful magic." Buffy observed. "And while we're on the subject of
people who never shut up, where's my darling baby sister?"
"She's in the bedroom studying." Willow told her, coming out and
folding her legs to sit on the floor.
Buffy stared at her. "Seriously? Oh, I am in awe of your power."
"Can't take the credit." Willow said, shaking her head. "Turns
out there's a boy in her biology class who likes brainy women." She sighed
melodramatically. "They must have started turning up *after* we graduated.
Durnit."
"I like brainy women." a quiet voice announced from the couch.
"Hello! That's two in five minutes! She's on a roll tonight,
children." Spike noted.
"That's my girl." Willow said proudly. "Anyway, I think Dawn's
planning on dazzling this guy with her amazing knowledge of fish anatomy
tomorrow."
"Ah, young love," Buffy said, wrinkling her nose. "Hey! Where're
our favorite honeymooners-in-training? I haven't had a bridal magazine photo
shoved up my nose in at least the last forty-eight hours."
"Need the paper for starter fuel up there?" Spike quipped.
Tara leaned forward without being asked. Buffy's hand connected with the back of
Spike's head.
"Ow! Bitch."
"Your roots are showing, William. Aren't they coming over tonight,
Will?"
Willow glanced at the clock and opened her mouth, just as there was a knock on
the door. Xander swung it open, stepping back for Anya. "Ask and ye shall
receive." Willow said.
"Did you miss us?" Xander asked, grinning.
"No." Spike replied, moving quick enough to duck the hand this time.
"Whoa! I don't w-want to be crossfire girl anymore." Tara said,
holding a hand up. "Return to your corners."
"Spike." Xander said. "Just when I get to thinking I might be
able to say this without swallowing my own tongue, you turn on the
anti-charm." Anya poked him. "Doing my best here, sweetie."
"Xander and I need to speak to Spike and Willow." Anya said to the
room at large.
There was a long, creeping silence, during which Anya's smile never faltered.
Finally Tara uttered a little gasped, "Oh!" and stood, tapping Buffy's
leg. "She wants us to leave."
"Yes. You're perceptive. It's one of my favorite things about you."
Anya said. "That, and the way you're not afraid to try unconventional
wardrobe experiments, no matter what others think." She found herself on
the receiving end of five stares. "What? I'm voicing honest kindness. It
makes me a warmer person."
"A thousand plus years and no one's snatched her up before now? I'm at a
loss." Spike marveled. Buffy swallowed a grin with difficulty.
"Buffy, Tara, if you'd excuse us for a few?" Xander said. "Just a
few, mind you. In fact if we don't come for you in about five minutes, well,
help."
"Why not?" Buffy shrugged as they headed for the bedroom. "I need
to brush up on my fish anatomy."
Willow plopped down on the couch beside Spike. "What's up, guys?"
"Well," Anya began, slipping her hand into Xander's, "as you
know, I've taken great pains to follow tradition in the planning of our wedding.
And that's why --"
Spike held his hand up.
"Yes?" Anya said sharply.
"Just out of curiosity, this isn't leading to another one of your 'Santa
was a carnivorous fertility deity' stories, is it?" the vampire asked
cautiously.
"No."
"Right. Carry on."
"As I was saying," Anya resumed, "one of the long-standing
traditions is the presence of the bride's maid-of-honor and the groom's best man
beside the bride and groom at the altar. Well, not so much beside as near, and
somewhat downward from. Because this day is really all about Xander and I, so it
wouldn't --"
"An. Baby. Floor plan later. Point now." Xander muttered gently under
his breath.
"All *right*!" she whispered harshly back over her shoulder. She
smiled brightly at the witch and the vampire, then turned her attention to
Willow. "Willow. You and I have really grown to know each other better over
the last couple of years, and although in the beginning I thought you were a
man-stealing hussy, I've actually grown fond of you. And after all, if it wasn't
for you making out with Xander behind Cordelia's back, I would never have been
called here to avenge her pain, and Xander and I would never have met at all! So
in a way, I owe my happiness to your devious hormones."
Willow blinked. "Oh, well, it...um, you're welcome?"
"And Spike!" Anya continued, caught up in the moment now. "If you
hadn't kidnapped Willow and Xander that night, Cordelia may never have caught
them in their indiscretions! You were instrumental to our joining."
"I think I'm disturbed by that." Spike said thoughtfully. "No, I
*know* I am."
"And evidently you're also significant to our sex life." Xander added
evilly.
Spike eyed him for a long moment. "*That*, I'm going to pretend I didn't
hear at all."
"Okay, how and why did a hostage situation become a warm and fuzzy
moment?" Willow broke in. "'Cause I'm kinda touched, but also kinda
wigged."
"Willow, I'd like you to be my maid of honor." Anya said. "Or,
lesbian of honor, if it's more PC."
"Oh. Really?" A smile broke out on Willow's face.
"Will you? Please? Pretty please?" Anya bounced in her shoes.
Willow looked at the ex-demon in amazement. "Anya, you said please."
"I know! Now say yes!" Anya's voice rose. "Please?"
"Okay, sure. Yes!" Willow said, a little of Anya's excitement rubbing
off.
Anya shrieked. "Oh good! I'm so glad. Of course you'll let me help with
your hair."
"I--"
"Okay Xander, your turn." Anya gave him a little push.
"Okay." Xander rolled his head, cracking his neck, then rolled his
shoulders. "Okay. I can do this." He looked at Spike. "I want you
to know this in no way means I dislike you any less."
"Don't do this, Harris."
"And before you say anything, you should realize that I can just go in
there and get Buffy to come out here and kick your ass until you do what Anya
wants."
"I'm serious, mate. You better not even think it."
"Spike," Xander took a deep breath.
"I'll kill you. I don't give a damn if my brain explodes, I will *kill* you
if you say one more word."
"Will you be my lesbian of honor, Spike?"
"You sick bastard."
"Is that a yes?"
"This is so wonderful." Anya exclaimed. "Oh, God, I'm so happy. I
think I'm going to cry." Suddenly her face twisted. "Oh, DAMMIT!"
She stamped her foot. "I forgot the damn video camera at home!"
END
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