Title: Normal Again

Author: Cat

E-mail: Cathy@edcom-int.com

Disclaimer: Joss owns everything.

Distribution: If you want it, Just ask.

Spoilers: Huge for season 6 Buffy

Rating: 15

Parings: Buffy/Angel, Willow/Xander

Feedback: Please send feedback. It feeds my mews!

Background: Set a year after Normal Again.

Summary: What if Buffy being in an institution was the real world and the Jossverse was Buffy's creation. Can she ever become part of the real world again? If she can what caused her to create her dream world?

Authors note: You will note that Lorne is in this fic. Please don't try and place him in Buffy's world. The character of Lorne in this isn't here because Buffy brought him into her fantasy life from the real world. He's just here 'cos I think he's a cool character and wanted to use him. Other than Lorne, the only real people in the jossverse are Angel, Willow, Xander, Cordie and Darla . Any other characters created after are from Buffy's imagination. So sorry, no Oz, Faith, Spike etc etc

Chapter 1

Angel walked along his old neighbourhood, looking around, smiling at the memories. He'd been back in LA for a little over a week but this was his first chance to revisit old haunts. He'd met up with a few college buddies the other night but his memories of college weren't his happiest. His memories of here were. Mainly Buffy and her friends.

He spotted the old coffee shop where he used to hang out and decided to reacquaint himself.

It looked much the same. A new coat of paint here and there but basically the same place. He ordered himself a coffee and took a seat.

He wondered just how many afternoons he had wasted in here with Buffy. Probably hundreds.

He smiled as he thought of Buffy again. Their relationship had never been definable but it had been real. The only way it had ever been described was as friends but it had been deeper than that.

Would she still remember him?

He wondered what kind of woman she had become. No doubt a strong one. Was she a Vet as she had always dreamed of?

"Angel?"

He turned to the voice.

"Oh my God, it is you." Said Cordelia as she came over and hugged him. "It's so good to see you."

"Hi Cordelia. How are you?" She was as effervescent as always.

"I'm great. Just let me get a coffee and we can catch up."

Angel sat back down. Cordie had been one of Buffy's friends. The rich, popular one of the group.

Cordelia returned a minute later with her coffee and sat down.

"So, what brings you back to LA Mr Big Shot?"

"Transfer. They needed someone with my skills in LA so I volunteered." 'Yeah, they needed you and you thought you could check up on Buffy, you are so sappy sometimes. Like she's been mooning over you all this time!'

Angel quickly put that thought aside. He shouldn't get his hopes up, Buffy probably had a hoard of boys after her. Hell, she could eyen be married by now.

"So, Cordelia how is everyone?"

"Great, we're all great. I graduated last year, Daddy brought me a gallery and, well it's hard work but I'm finally starting to show a profit. Willow, well she and Xander got married about six months ago."

"You and Xander broke up?"

"Oh yeah, years ago. We were just too different. Anyway, Willow graduated pre med and is in med school now, Xander, well he became a builder and carpenter but he's doing well for himself. He's going to start his own company in the next few years, once Willow's qualified and working."

"That's good. And Buffy? How is she?"

Cordelia looked quizzically at him.

"What?" he asked. "She's OK isn't she?"

"Oh god, you don't know do you?" said Cordelia with a pained look.

"Know what?"

Chapter 2

Angel walked down the white sterile hallways, afraid of what he would find. "Seven years?" he asked, still in shock.

"Yep. Seven." Said Cordelia with a sigh. "Awful isn't it."

"And she doesn't get any better?"

"Sometimes she's shown progress but she always regresses again. About a year ago she seemed to be coming out of it again but then… I don't know." Cordelia shopped him in the hall and faced him. "She wont recognise you Angel. She won't speak to you, she wont react at all. She's catatonic, has been for almost a year."

Angel nodded, trying to match a catatonic Buffy to the girl he had known.

Cordie carried on walking and Angel followed her.

"You come here often?"

"Not as often as I should. We came all the time originally, the doctors said it would help. And every time she's been making progress we came back. All her friends are on the visitors list so we can come and go as we want but… It's… It's just too painful to see her like this.

She stopped outside a room, she took a deep breath and opened the door to go in.

"Buffy!" she said as she entered. "It's good to see you again." She said as she brushed a few stray strands of hair off Buffy's face. "I have a visitor for you. It's Angel, he came to see you. Isn't that nice?"

Cordie stepped back and Angel got his first good look at Buffy. She was lying on her side, facing the door, curled up in the foetal position. Her eyes were closed. If it weren't for the rise and fall of her chest he would almost believe she was dead.

"Angel, say Hi to Buffy." Cordie prompted.

Angel gingerly stepped forward. "Buffy? Buffy can you hear me?"

Seeing a chair next to the wall he put it by the head of the bed and sat down. "Buffy?" He gently took her hand and clasped it between his own hands, she didn't offer any resistance. She looked so frail. "Buffy? Buffy, I know you're in there. I'm sorry I left Buffy. I should have come back but I didn't know… Please Buffy. If you can hear me let me know. Blink or something. Buffy… Please."

He gently wiped the hair away from her face. "I know you're in there. I know you remember me. Come back to Buffy. Let me help you."

Finally Angel's tears began to fall. How could this have happened? She was so vital, so alive.

"Buffy." He sobbed, bring her hand to his cheek.

Almost imperceptibly he felt a squeeze on his hand. "Buffy? That's it Buffy. Come back to me." The grip strengthened but there were no other signs she even knew he was there. But Angel knew.

"Cordie, get a doctor." He ordered.

"Sure." She said leaving.

"I'm here now Buffy. We'll work this through together. I'll never leave you again. I promise."

"Mr O'Connor?" Angel turned to the voice. "I'm Dr Lansing, Buffy's primary doctor. How can I help you?"

"Doctor, she reacted to me. She's squeezing my hand."

The doctor ventured further into the room to check, sure enough he could see Buffy's knuckled were white through gripping his hand so hard.

"Indeed." he said with a sigh.

"Well this is good right?"

The doctor sighed again. "Perhaps we could talk out in the hall."

Angel looked back to Buffy. He didn't want to leave her but he had to know what the doctor had to say.

"Buffy. I'm going out into the hallway. I'll be able to see you the whole time. OK?" she gripped his hand harder, almost to the point of pain. "I have to go Buffy, but I will be back in just a minute. I'm not leaving you. Not ever again."

Buffy still didn't release her grip so Angel had to pry himself out of it. Once free Buffy whimpered and pulled her hand close again. It broke Angel's heart.

"This way." Said the doctor." As he ushered Angel into the hall. Cordie was waiting there for them.

"Doctor, surly this is progress?" he asked.

"Perhaps, but she's been much more lucid than this before and she always reverts back to her world."

"Her world?"

"Yes. She's created an internal world for herself. She's some kind of superhero, battling monsters and what not." The doctor paused to collect his thoughts. "I don't mean to be blunt but I think the chances of ever getting her back are virtually zero."

Angel leaned against the wall, thinking. "There's still a chance though?" he asked.

"We never give up hope."

"I want to take her out of here."

"This is the best facility in California, she won't get better help anywhere else."

"I know. I don't want to send her to another institution. I want to take her home."

"I don't think that's wise. Buffy has been violent on occasion and she requires round the clock care."

"That's not a problem."

"Including physiotherapy to ensure her limbs don't atrophy and constant medication." the doctor paused. "I really don't feel moving her is the best move."

"I can handle that. It won't be a problem."

The doctor became agitated now. "Sir, I really don't feel that you understand the severity of her condition."

"I don't want to hear it." Said Angel, now determined. He had learnt from the legal profession that the more someone didn't want you to do something, the more important that something turned out to be. "Who is her legal guardian?"

"Her parents but I doubt they'll let you take her out."

"Watch me."

"Then it'll be against medical advice."

Angel ignored him, took his cell phone out and placed a few calls.

The doctor looked stern and tried to stare Angel out. He didn't have courtroom experience though and Angel won the contest. His temper, the one that used to get him in trouble as a child, served him well in court. His look was a practised one, it was icy, hard and full of venom, one that could stop most people in their tracks and make even the innocent question themselves.

Outmatched, the doctor simply turned and strode off down the hall, muttering to himself.

Chapter 3

Angel returned to Buffy's room a few minutes later. Her parents were on their way to talk to him. He knew of a consultant psychotherapist to the firm who could treat her and his wife, a registered Nurse, could provide the care she needed. There was no way he would leave her in this hellhole.

"Buffy?" he asked, sitting down again.

Buffy held her hand out and he took it again.

"See, I told you I'd be back. And I want to take you home with me. Your parents are coming here and I want them to sign the release forms for me."

No reaction at all.

"Did you hear me Buffy? You're coming home. With me."

Cordelia watched from the doorway. Angel was new to this catatonia thing. Unfortunately he would soon learn the hard way that nothing could help Buffy. She sighed. Everything about this situation was all so sad and pointless.

Hank and Joyce summers arrived about half an hour later. Angel stood up to greet them but he couldn't shake hands, Buffy was still gripping on to his.

"What's this about?" asked Hank.

"Mr and Mrs Summers, I'd like permission to take Buffy home with me."

"What?" asked hank.

"Are you crazy?" asked Joyce.

"No, I'm not crazy, I just think I can help."

"Look son, don't you think we've tried everything there is to try? She's been here almost seven years and had every conceivable treatment money could buy."

"I understand that but my firm has access to a lot of experts you don't. Please. Just let me try."

"Your firm?" asked Joyce. "I don't understand."

"I'm a Junior Partner with Ziegler and Cassini."

"The Law Firm?"

"Yes, we have access to the top experts in every conceivable field of medicine and psychology."

Hank was a little taken aback. He remembered Angel from when Buffy was younger and he had known he was in law school then became a lawyer. He just had no idea how successful a lawyer he was.

"I... I see." Was all he could manage to say.

"Look Mr and Mrs Summers, I'm taking her out of here. I'd like to do it with your permission."

"And if we say no?" asked Hank.

"I'll have the courts declare you unfit to be her guardian."

"So we have no choice?" asked Joyce.

"You have a choice. You can cooperate or not. Either way I'm taking her home."

Hank sighed. He had neither the resources nor the time to fight a battle with Ziegler and Cassini. They were one of the top law firms in the US. And maybe this fella was right, maybe he could help. Hank looked to Joyce who nodded her agreement.

"OK young man, we'll release her. I just hope you know what you're letting yourself in for."

"Thank you. Oh, and tell the doctor I'll need a complete copy of her medical records. And I have experts to go through that too, if anything's missing, I'll know."

Chapter 4

Angel arrived back at his house a few hours later. He had to carry Buffy into the house. Hs housekeeper had made the spare room up, next to his.

He found Lorne and his wife waiting for him.

"Lorne, Kathy. Good to see you." Said Angel placing Buffy on the bed.

"You too. So, this is the patient?"

"Yep, Buffy Ann Summers."

Lorne opened his medical bag and first gave her a check up, checking breathing, blood pressure, pulse etc etc.

"Well physically she's fine. A little weak from the muscle atrophy but other than that fine."

"So it's defiantly psychological?" asked Kathy.

"Well it's too early to say that." Said Lorne. "I want a full blood work up and complete tests before I diagnose anything. Oh, and Kathy if you could find me a list of her medication."

"Sure."

"The files in the car." Said Angel. "I'll help you get it."

"Hmm." Said Lorne as he reviewed the notes.

"What?" asked Angel.

"She's on a lot of drugs here."

"Too many?"

"More that I would prescribe." He closed the file. "I'm going to take her off the meds for a while. She's due for her next dose now so we'll get them out of her system."

"She'll be OK?"

"Probably. What I suggest if the three of us stay here for the weekend. If anything happens we have a psychologist, a nurse and two big burly men. I think we can handle it. And the hospital gave us a supply of her meds so if she needs to go back on them she can." He checked his watch. "Kathy should be back soon. The clinic doesn't usually do this but $100 extra we'll have the results by tomorrow, weekend be damned." Lorne smiled reassuringly. "Don't worry, we'll take good care of her."

Angel's next job was to contact Buffy's friends, namely Willow and Xander. Once he had filled them in on the situation he decided to dress Buffy. Unfortunately all he had were his clothes but they would have to do and they were much better than the hospital gown she had been wearing. Dressed in his sweat pants and a shirt he carried Buffy out to the deck in the garden and sat her in a chair. Lorne and Kathy joined them and they each took a section of the medical file to go through. It was huge.

Not wanting to talk out loud about some things Angel wrote on a slip of paper and passed it to Lorne.

There are old scars on Buffy's back. Faint but they look like lacerations of some kind.

Lorne read the note and past his own back.

What from?

Angel shrugged and wrote another note.

Noticed them when I changed her, they weren't there when I left LA.

Lorne pointed to the file as if to say the answers could be in there. Angel nodded and began reading his section.

It was dry to say the least but Angel was used to that. Law was dry too but he had a talent for information like that.

Lorne passed Angel a sheet of paper from the file, Angel read it. It was in Doctor short hand but he was used to that. It read:-

Patient presents with delusions of vampires and demons. Suspect trauma of some kind but patient is uncooperative in the extreme.

Medical exam found recently healed lacerations to the back. Patient claims they were done during a fight with a vampire.

Angel handed the sheet back, he needed to make a phone call.

"I'm going in, anyone want anything?" he asked, as he looked to Buffy he saw her looking at him. Her expression was blank but her eyes were clearly focused on him.

"Lorne."

Lorne looked up. "Someone's up. Hey there Buffy. I'm Lorne Doran."

Nothing from Buffy. Angel moved to the side slightly, her eyes followed him.

Knowing it wasn't a fluke he went over to her and kneeled beside her.

"Hey there." He said smiling and taking her hand. "How are you?" No reaction. "Stupid question. Do you want something? Squeeze my hand if you do."

Buffy squeezed. Angel beamed at her. "Good. Squeeze when I get to what you want. OK? Water? Juice? Coke," Buffy squeezed lightly. "Like a coke but not a coke?" another light squeeze. "Diet coke?" Buffy squeezed harder.

Angel kissed her forehead lightly and said, "You go it. I'll be right back."

Buffy released his hand to looked back out to the garden.

Angel made his phone call to Mel, his assistant, quickly as he prepared Buffy's drink.

"Mel, I need you to go to work. I need every bit of information there is on a Buffy Ann Summers. She was a student at Hemery high. I want police records, hospital records, anything on her at all. And also on any classmates she had contact with between the ages of 13 and 15. Concentrate on the people she had the most contact with first, boyfriends and such, then work out from there."

"Is this for a case?"

"Maybe. Just do it, it's important."

"Got it."

They hung up and Angel took the drink out to Buffy. He sat beside her and placed the glass to her lips. Her eyes focused on his again as he gently tilted the glass up. She drank slowly.

A drop of the coke dribbled down her chin, she made no move to wipe it away. Angel used his sleeve to wipe it away.

Angel didn't want to break the small contact she had made with him. He scooped her up, an easy task since she was severely underweight, and sat down with her on his lap. She leaned into him and Angel continued reading the file over her, every now and again he would kiss the top of her head or stroke her hair.

Lorne watched them from time to time. Angel had told him Buffy was an old friend but there was more to it than that. A lot more.

Chapter 5

As the evening turned chilly they went into the house. Angel decided Chinese was the order of the day and arranged to have it delivered.

After they had eaten and Angel had spoon fed Buffy, they decided to turn in for the evening. Angel carried Buffy to bed and showed Lorne and Kathy to their room.

Angel went back to Buffy's room to see she wasn't wear he had left her. She was sitting up in bed, looking in the mirror.

"Buffy?" she turned to face him. "What is it?"

"I don't know. Where am I?"

Angel couldn't believe it, she was talking. "You're at my home Buffy."

"But you left, you went to New York."

"I came back." He went to sit next to her on the bed. "Buffy, do you remember what happened after I left?"

Buffy's brow creased as she tried to think. "I remember a hospital."

Fearful of pushing her too fast Angel decided not to ask any more. "That's good. Why don't you get some sleep now, we can talk more in the morning."

Buffy nodded. Her expression was no longer blank but she still wasn't quite all there. Angel laid her back on the bed and pulled the covers over her. He then lay in the other side and took her hand.

Buffy stared at him, then reached out and touched his cheek. "Are you real?"

"Yes Buffy. I'm as real as you."

"I'm not real."

"You are Buffy. You are real, and you're with me."

Buffy nodded and closed her eyes.

As soon as Buffy was asleep Angel left her to see Lorne. He told her Buffy had spoken.

"Can't say I'm surprised. I was hoping for something like this once she came off the medication. Poor girl was drugged up to her eyeballs. What's she doing now?"

"She's sleeping."

"Probably best. By the morning the drugs should be almost completely gone from her system."

"So it's the drugs doing this to her."

"Possibly, but not completely." Angel nodded.

There would be no easy resolution here, he had known that. Still he couldn't help but hope.

He said his goodnights to Lorne and Kathy and returned to Buffy.

Chapter 6

Angel woke up in the morning to find Buffy touching his face again.

"What is it?" he asked.

"Your still here."

"Where would I go?"

Buffy smiled slightly.

"Hungry?" Angel asked. Buffy nodded. "Come on then, lets get you something to eat."

Angel led Buffy down to the kitchen to find Lorne cooking.

"Morning compadres. Just making omelettes. Anyone want?"

"Put us down for two." Said Angel.

"And how are you this morning princess?" Lorne asked Buffy.

"OK I guess. I feel weird."

"Of course you do. But don't worry about it we all feel weird from time to time."

Buffy offered a weak smile. "Smells good."

"It is good." Said Lorne serving the first omelette up. "And for such a complement you get first offerings."

Buffy took the plate and smiled weakly. Angel led her over to the table where she sat with Kathy while Angel got her some juice.

Buffy seemed to have no problems eating on her own this morning, although she couldn't finish it all.

Everyone made small talk but Buffy just sat there watching.

"Buffy." Said Angel when they were finished eating. "I want to go over a few things later today. Do you feel up to that?" Buffy shook her head. "That's OK. You don't have to do anything you don't want."

Buffy looked relieved.

"Willow and Xander are coming over later," he said. Buffy smiled slightly. "I thought the three of you could go clothes shopping."

Buffy nodded but looked scared.

Angel took her hand. "Don't worry. They'll look after you. And you can't go around wearing my clothes for ever."

Buffy nodded but still didn't speak. Angel wondered if he'd caused her to relapse again.

He reached across the table and took her hand. "Buffy, look at me." She met his gaze. "You will be fine. I promise you. I'll be right here when you get back."

"Why can't you come?"

"I have some work to do here. I'm sorry but I have to. You will be OK, honestly."

Buffy nodded again.

Willow and Xander arrived a little later, Angel led them to Buffy who was sitting on the deck again.

"Oh my god Buffy." Said Willow rushing to hug her. "You're... You're, well you're..."

"Hey Will." Said Buffy, cutting her off.

Xander came next though he was more reserved. "Good to see you up and about Buff. Ready to shop till you drop? A-man here's going to give us his credit card."

"I'm ready."

Angel kissed Buffy lightly. "The car's outside waiting, it'll take you where ever you want and wait for you."

Buffy just nodded.

"OK, come on." Said Willow taking Buffy's hand and leading her out. Buffy glanced over her shoulder as she left, her look pleaded with Angel not to make her go.

Lorne came up behind him. "She'll be fine. You know it."

"I know, I know. I just wish it felt fine."

"Look she's only going to one store, she's being driven there and back and she's with her two best friends."

Angel sighed. He knew all that. It didn't stop him feeling like he'd betrayed her though. "We have work to do." He said simply.

"We do." Agreed Lorne. "But first you and I need to talk."

"What about?"

"Buffy. You haven't told me the truth have you?"

Angel looked down. "Not all of it."

Lorne listened as Angel recounted his history with Buffy.

"I first met her when my girlfriend of the time, Darla, was babysitting for the Summers. Buffy was 7 but she seemed older, wiser. I liked her. She and Darla fought all the time but the weird thing was Buffy won most arguments, and she was usually right. Darla could be a bit of a bitch at times." He sighs at the memory.

"Gradually we built up a friendship. I began to see her and her friends when Darla wasn't babysitting. We kind of formed a brother sister relationship. I could tell her anything and I knew she'd keep it to herself. She did the same with me. We spoke a lot about our families, her's were fighting. I could relate to that. It was just fun to get away from Law School sometimes. She was this free spirit and no matter what my problems were, I could forget them while I was with her."

"But that's not all is it?"

"No." Angel had never told anyone this before. He knew he could trust Lorne, he was just ashamed of himself. "As Buffy grew up the relationship changed. The innocent touches became something else. We both tried to deny it but we couldn't for very long. One day we just ended up kissing. She was only 13."

"And you were 25."

"Yeah. I knew it had to stop but I couldn't make it. Every time I was with her we'd end up making out." Angel paused to collect his thoughts. "Eventually I decided the only thing I could do was leave. I asked the firm for a transfer and they sent me to New York."

"Did you tell Buffy?"

"I did. I explained how we could never work. Not when she was so young. I told her I loved her and I always would but I had to do this." Angel paused. "She cried, a lot. But just before I left she came to see me and told me she understood." A wry smile formed on his lips. "I told you she was wise beyond her years."

Angel finally made eye contact with Lorne. "So, that's my dark secret, I fell in love with a child."

"It doesn't make you a bad person. We can't help who we fall in love with." Something occurred to Lorne. "You came back here to see if she still wanted you didn't you?"

Angel could see he was caught. "Yeah, partly. I didn't have to take this transfer. But part of me never got over her. And I don't think I ever will."

"And 22 and 34 doesn't seem that big an age gap now does it?"

Angel shook his head. "You can read me so well. The only other person who could do that was Buffy."

Lorne smiled understandingly. "Come on, let's get to work."

Chapter 7

Lorne, Kathy and Angel sat round reviewing the medical file and matching it with the data Mel has just had delivered. The history check wasn't complete but it was all they had so far.

"So," began Angel. "Buffy was first committed when she was 14 for two weeks, she was having delusions of vampires but found to be just a troubled girl. She was released for a few months then tried to burn down the gym when she had just turned 15."

Lorne had his pad out and was taking notes. "But the lacerations were present on the initial hospitalisation. Something did them."

"Who, or what?" asked Kathy.

"Her parents?" suggested Lorne.

Angel shook his head. "They were distant, fighting a lot but I don't think they'd ever hurt her."

Lorne nodded. "How about a school mate or an accident?"

Angel consulted his documents again. "I don't know. There's a whole box here, we need to go through it, find out about everyone."

"OK, pass it out." Said Lorne.

They each took a selection of documents and began looking through.

Buffy arrived back an hour an hour and a half later. Angel rushed to meet her.

She was wearing a simple pair or trousers and a jumper. "You look good." He said, at which Buffy crossed her arms protectively over her chest. "Did you have fun?"

Buffy shrugged.

Angel kissed her forehead. "I'm proud of you. You did well."

"Come on Buffy." Said willow. "Let's go unpack this stuff."

Angel went back to where Kathy and Lorne were. "Are you sure it's a good idea?"

Lorne looked up. "It's fine. Trust me I have three medical schools that say so."

Angel smiled. "OK, who am I to argue with that."

"Good man."

When Buffy came back down Lorne explained what he wanted to do.

"Buffy. I'd like to talk with you if I could. In private."

"What about?"

"Your other life. Don't worry, we wont discuss anything you don't want to. OK?"

"Sure, OK." Lorne led Buffy away to the study where they could talk alone.

"What is all this stuff?" asked Willow.

"History. You may be able to help us actually." Said Angel

"Sure, what ever you need."

Xander and willow sat down and prepared for the questions.

Chapter 8

"Buffy, I'd like to talk about your other life." Lorne began. "Take a detailed history if I may?"

"You mean the imaginary life." Said Buffy dryly.

"No, not at all."

"Don't shrink me." Said Buffy, harshly.

Lorne sat forward. "Buffy, I'm not trying to shrink you. I swear. I view this situation like Einstein would have."

"Einstein?"

"Yeah, he had this fantastic theory that everything was relative. OK, I know he was talking about science but I believe that too. Ask any two people about the same situation and you'll get a different story. I don't do things like other psychiatrists Buffy, that's not my style. I just want you to tell me your story."

Buffy sighed. She didn't really want to go over this again and receive the Um's and Aah's that just screamed, "How insane are you!"

But she kind of liked Lorne. He was unorthodox. Maybe he wouldn't do that.

Buffy began with the burning of the gym and the move to Sunnydale.

Lorne didn't Um and Aah at her. He asked questions, sympathised with her, laughed with her. Not once did he undermine her other life.

It was over five hours later when they finished. Lorne looked over his notes. He had a detailed version of a fictitious life. But a life he was sure had a grounding in reality somewhere. She had used aspects of her own life in this world, such as her handling of Angel leaving. In this life was the answer he was looking for.

"Well that's it with the questions for today." He said putting the pad aside. "I just want to check you over again, make sure taking you off the drugs hasn't caused any physical problems, then we'll go back to the others."

"Sure. OK."

Buffy walked in to see the whole group going through files and papers.

"What's going on?" asked Buffy.

"Nothing." Said Angel quickly. He saw Lorne shake his head taking it as a sign not to lie to her. "OK, it's not nothing. This is a complete history of your life and your classmates. Or as much as we have so far, we're still looking into some people."

Buffy nodded but looked frightened.

"What is it?" Angel asked.

"Nothing. You won't find anything. I'm just insane. This isn't real anyway so you might as well go ahead and look."

That was the second time Buffy had mentioned this reality nor being real. Angel would have to talk about that with Lorne later.

"So, what have we got?" asked Lorne.

The others read out the information. Willow and Xander took the notes about Buffy and her schoolmates. Angel read the notes made from the medical file. Lorne sat there looking over his notes of Buffy's other life as they went.

"There's a pattern here." Said Lorne simply once they were finished. "We don't have all the pieces here but it seems clear someone's trying to kill Buffy."

"Kill her?" asked Angel.

Lorne nodded. "Perhaps not physically kill her but someone wanted to destroy the essence of what Buffy was so she would no longer be a threat."

"A threat to what though?" asked Angel. Buffy came over to him looking scared and he pulled her onto his lap.

Lorne sighed. "I don't have all the answers yet but this is what I can tell you."

He fished around for the medical notes he had made. "Buffy was sent to the Seaview clinic originally. She was already having delusions. They did a blood test but they didn't do a drug test according to the file. I think the file has been altered though. I think a drug test was done and something was found." Lorne could see Angel was about to interrupt so he held up his hand. "Just hear me out. So, she's at the clinic, gets better and is released. She relapses, quite violently and is sent to a different clinic where her internal world begins to form more. Before she went there her delusions were temporary, she could still interact with the rest of the world."

Lorne looked down at his notes again, "She didn't completely revert into her own world until she was in the second clinic. Now from here this is speculation. Buffy's internal world was created only partly by her. I think someone else has been trying to drive her out of the real world and then shatter her internal world." He sighed. "Her internal world was her only form of defence against what was happening to her. Take that away and she had nothing."

"What does that mean?" asked angel.

"Essentially she would be a vegetable. No higher brain activity. They would have killed Buffy off."

"That's a big step Honey." Said Kathy.

"I know but hear me out. In Buffy's world, Sunnydale, there are always challenges for her. She is a superhero though. I think becoming a slayer was the only way, mentally, she could beat the things being thrown at her. Now, just after she gets there she makes a life for herself. She's brought her friends with her to this place, she even brought Angel. She was happy. Then things start to happen, this Master vampire was rising but she stopped him. She tried to make a life for herself, form relationships but every time she tried something tried to stop her. Xander was possessed, Angel turned out to be a vampire, but Buffy over came all those obstacles. Then the Master killed Buffy but still she wouldn't give in. She had Angel and Xander revive her and she defeated this creature. Next Angel turns bad, so bad she has to kill him and it destroys her. If they couldn't kill Buffy then why not make her kill someone she loves. And it almost worked. But Buffy returned to her friends. She even managed to bring Angel back to life."

"So your saying someone was creating this life for her?" asked Angel.

"Partly. They tried to destroy the world she was in, make it as hard as they could for her to live there. But Buffy's strong, she wouldn't let them and overcame every tragedy they put there for her. They finally even managed to make her kill herself at one point but instead of giving in Buffy found her way back to this reality again. When they realised they couldn't shatter her internal world and destroy her, I think they give her more drugs and pushed her back into her other life. Between the two of them they created this world."

"But you cant just create something like this." Said Angel. "And besides, she was having delusions before she went in."

Lorne nodded. "I know. I have a theory about that too." He paused. "I think Buffy was given a hallucinogen."

"What, like LSD?"

"Or magic mushrooms, there are hundreds if types out there. But someone hallucinating can present like a schizophrenic, which is why she was diagnosed as such. Unfortunately the drugs to treat schizophrenic can make the sane person schizophrenic. I think that's why Buffy's been trapped in this world and why she responded so fast when we took her off the drugs. The Lab results are also higher than her chart says. So while she hasn't been given illegal drugs in hospital, someone has been over dosing her on these drugs."

Angel looked down to Buffy sitting on his lap. She was gently sobbing. He wrapped his arms around her and hugged her. His thoughts alternating between respect for this child who had been forced to endure that and anger at who ever had done it. They would pay.

"So" began willow, "we still need to find out what happened to Buffy originally. Why she was sent to the clinic for the first two weeks."

Buffy obviously hadn't confided in Willow since she was as clueless as the rest of them. He wondered if Buffy even remembered after everything that had happened to her.

Angel picked up the phone from beside him on the table and called Mel.

"Sorry Mel, I have another project for you."

"Don't worry about it. I live for stress." She said light heartedly.

"I want to see if any of Buffy's class mates has any kind of criminal record. Also check their families. Finally I want all the doctors of the Sunny Hill Clinic checked out, completely including criminal records again, especially a Dr Lansing."

"OK, not a problem." Mel paused. "Can I ask what this is about? I know you only just got here but the bosses don't appreciate company resources being used for personal projects."

"I understand that. But trust me, if we find what we want we'll be looking at the biggest medical negligence claim you've ever seen."

"OK, we'll get right on it."

Angel hung up the phone and looked at his watch. "It's getting late, we should all turn in."

Everyone agreed, it had been a long day. Angel offered Willow and Xander a bed but they refused. They left promising to return as soon as they could though. Angel made them promise not to tell anyone about Buffy's improvement. The fewer people who knew, the safer Buffy was.

Lorne and Kathy went to their room and Angel settled Buffy in hers. He lay next to her again and took her hand.

They didn't speak, they just slowly drifted off to sleep.

Chapter 9

Buffy didn't sleep well without all her medication and frequently awoke from nightmares. Angel reassured her each time she woke and gently coaxed her back to sleep.

By the morning neither had a very restful night but Angel had to get up and check with his bosses.

He spoke to Malcolm Lynn, the senior partner who had hired him originally and coached him through the Bar exam. He explained the situation and Lorne's suspicions to him. He left out his relationship to Buffy and tried to win Malcolm over on the merits of the case.

"Look, Angel, If what you sat if right and she's been harmed while in their care this is huge." He sighed. "I also know there's something else going on here. It's OK, you don't have to tell me." He paused briefly. "I'm giving you a month off, I mean you haven't taken a vacation in years so it's due to you. And I'll give you a team of three investigators."

Angel was grateful. "Thank you Malcolm. I appreciate it."

"I know you do. Just sort it out."

"I will sir."

Lorne was the next up.

"I have a few patients to see today. I thought I'd pop into the original hospital, get a copy of her records from there to check for inconsistencies." Said Lorne.

"Good idea."

"Which hospital treated her originally?"

Angel glanced over to her file. "Looks like... Seaview."

"That's not too far out of the way."

"Will they release the file to you?"

"Shouldn't be a problem as I'm her treating physician now."

"If they give you any bother at all call me, I'll have a hundred lawyers there within half an hour."

Lorne smiled. "Thanks. Hopefully it wont come to that." He checked his watch. "I'd better get going. I checked on Buffy, she's still sleeping."

"Yeah, she had a rough night."

"Kathy's waiting for her to wake up then she'll check her vitals."

"OK, have a good day." Said Angel.

"You too."

Lorne left just as the phone rang. Angel waved goodbye while answering it.

"I'm sending a fax through." Mel said. "My source at the police department came through."

"About the Gym incident?" said Angel checking to see the fax coming through.

"No. It looks like she was raped. The report says they tried to interview her twice while in hospital."

The fax was through and Angel ripped it from the machine. "Thanks Mel. I appreciate it." He hung up and read the report.

Buffy had been admitted to County General with a suspected rape. The report says she was uncooperative with officers and kept repeating that Vampires had raped her. A rape kit had been done on her while sedated.

Angel called Lorne on his cell phone.

"Lorne, it wasn't Seaview Buffy was admitted to. I just got a police report, she was admitted to County General, after being raped."

"Oh my." Said Lorne taking a deep breath. "OK, I'll check with Seaview, make sure she was never a patient then pick up the records from County. If what you say is true we're looking at a complete falsification of her records."

"And a motive for wanting Buffy out of the way."

"Agreed. I'll get back to you when I know more."

"Thanks."

Angel was reeling from this recent turn of events. He needed the information and he needed it now. He called Mel back.

"I want you to concentrate on the doctors for the time being. Find me everything you can."

"So stop checking into her classmates?"

"No, just make the doctors a priority."

"Got it. By the way, when this is over, your going to owe me one big present."

"Anything you want Mel."

Angel put the phone down to see Buffy and Kathy coming down stairs.

"What's wrong?" asked Buffy when she saw Angel's worried expression.

"I think we're on to something. Lorne's checking it out. Want some breakfast?"

Angel made Buffy and Kathy eggs. Buffy could see he was agitated and it worried her. After breakfast she suggested they take a walk in the grounds.

Chapter 10

They walked in silence for a long time. The garden was huge and ended by the rock face, looking out over the sea.

"Nice place you have here." Buffy said.

"Thanks but it's not mine. The firm's letting me stay here for a few months until I find somewhere." He paused a second. "How are you feeling?"

"Overwhelmed mainly."

"Understandable."

"It's like I'm waking up from a bad dream, but the reality is just as scary."

"You will get through this. We'll get through it together."

"There's just so much I missed. I'm 22 years old, I should have a high school education, a degree or a career by now. Instead I feel like a fifteen year old girl, suddenly having to deal with life."

"One step at a time Buffy. Things usually don't look so bad once you face them."

Buffy sighed.

They continued in silence for a while before Angel finally spoke. "Buffy, I'm sorry I left. I should have stayed here, with you."

Realising 'the talk' was about to take place Buffy sat on a fallen log looking out over the sea, Angel joined her.

"Angel, it's not your fault. You had to go, we both know that."

"But if I had stayed I might have stopped it."

"It wasn't your place to look after me. And if you had stayed you'd have earnt yourself a statory rape conviction and could have kissed goodbye to the Bar."

"You think that matters?"

"No. Angel I know you loved me but you did the right thing. I could never have lived with myself knowing that you'd given up on your dreams for me."

Angel smiled and pulled her to him. She rested her head on his shoulder.

"You don't change." He said. "Even after all this you think of others first."

They sat there in silence for a while, looking out at the ocean. The sound of the waves breaking the only background noise.

"Why don't we look into High School courses when we get back?"

"I don't know. I'm not sure I'm ready."

Angel kissed the top of her head. "I know, it's scary. For me, all I can tell you is that every exam I took, every course I passed was another stop away from home, from the life I didn't want. It felt empowering."

Buffy knew, she'd been there during Angel's quest to get out. "How are your parents?" she asked.

"Um, Mom died, dad's doing 15 to life for it."

"Oh god! That's awful." Said Buffy siting up and looking at him.

"It was their life. They didn't have anything to do with me after the money incident anyway."

Buffy remembered. His mother has asked him for cash about six months before he left. Angel wasn't rich, far from it but he did have some savings. He promised his mother everything he had if she and his father enrolled in AA. His mother called him every name under the sun then hung up after telling he was no longer their child.

He had been so upset that night. That was the first time she had kissed him.

"I'm so sorry. What happened?"

"They got into a drunken fight again, he pushed her down stairs, broke her neck."

"When?"

"About two years ago. Dad even had the gall to call me to represent him."

"Did you?"

"I couldn't. I also couldn't leave him with a PD so I found a local lawyer with a good rep, hired him. Didn't help though, he was as guilty as hell."

"I'm so sorry Angel." Said Buffy hugging him.

"Don't be. It's over now."

"Still, of all the outcomes, that cant be the one you wanted."

"No, but it wasn't my choice. Besides, we have more important things to worry about now."

"Yeah, I guess we do."

Angel hesitated before continuing. "Buffy, I know what happened. At least part of it." Buffy sat up and looked at him. "Want to tell me about it?"

Tears began forming in Buffy's eyes, Angel pulled her into an embrace. "I don't remember much, just hazy visions of these awful, deformed looking people… Hurting me." She paused to wipe away tears. "I remember a hospital. I tried to tell them the truth, about the vampires but they didn't believe me. Then the police came and I tried to tell them but they thought I was crazy too. I decided I wouldn't tell anyone else."

"Where were you when they hurt you?"

"I was with Tyler, at his friends birthday party. I felt strange, I couldn't find Tyler. The next thing I remember is them."

"And what happened in the school gym?"

"I felt strange again and the next thing I knew the place was full of vampires, all with their deformed faces and fangs. I knew the only way to get rid of them was to burn the place down." Buffy paused and wiped away her tears. "So, do you think I'm crazy?"

Angel kissed the top of her head. "Never."

"But they don't exist right? How can I be sane?"

"No body is completely sane Buffy. I don't know why you thought they were vampires but I don't think your crazy. I think you're wonderful. We'll figure it out, together."

Buffy dried her tears and they carried on walking.

Buffy eventually broached the subject she had been wanting to. "I'm surprised you aren't married yet."

Angel laughed.

"What's so funny?"

"Nothing. It's just I haven't had a relationship over two months, let alone marriage."

"Why not?"

"They weren't right. Besides, I still had a thing for my ex."

Buffy smiled and he took her hand. They walked in silence back to the house.

Chapter 11

Lorne arrived back at the house around lunch time.

"I thought you were working today?" said Kathy as she kissed him.

"Cancelled." Said Lorne. His demeanour was agitated. "Look at this." He said handing a file to Angel.

Angel took it and skimmed through the first few pages.

She had been admitted to County with suspected rape injuries. Two deep Lacerations to her back, multiple abrasions that hadn't broken the skin, possibly caused by a whip or thin belt. Bruising to her upper arms and wrists consistent with being held down. Bite wounds to her breasts, consistent with human teeth. The skin wasn't broken though. Multiple bruising to her inner thighs and a vaginal tear.

She was delirious when admitted, screaming about being attacked by vampires. Became violent and was subdued with a sedative.

Angel looked over to Lorne, they shared a worried look. Angel continued reading.

Blood tests were done and she as found to have a cocktail of hallucinogens in her blood.

Angel figured the bite marks combined with the hallucinogens had caused her to believe it was vampires attacking her.

Buffy looked on concerned. She truly didn't remember that night but occasionally she would have dreams about it or flashbacks. Random images. She was never certain if they were real or not though. She guessed she was soon about to find out the truth.

Angel continued reading. She was uncooperative with the police and sent to the mental ward for observation.

She later settled and claimed to have no memory of the attack and agreed that Vampires were not real. She was released back into her parents care.

Angel closed the file and looked at Buffy. "Are you ready for this?"

Buffy took a deep breath and held her hand out for the file. Angel handed it to her.

To Buffy it didn't make much sense being in doctors short hand. "What does it say?" she asked, handing it back to him.

Angel took her to the sofa and sat down next to her.

He explained the injuries she had to her. As he explained fragments of memory returned. Buffy felt her tears form but she wouldn't let them flow. Not until she had heard everything.

Lorne prepared a syringe of sedatives, just in case.

Angel finished with her discharge and closed the file.

Buffy let the tears fall now and Angel pulled her into his embrace, cooing softly to her.

Chapter 12

Angel, Lorne, Kathy and Buffy were sitting round later, discussing the options. They were still waiting for Mel to come up with the criminal records from the police. In the mean time they were discussing theories.

Lorne kept a close eye on Buffy. After what she had learnt today it was possible she could relapse at any moment.

She was proving him wrong though. Although Lorne didn't know Buffy he was extremely proud of her. She had endured hell, even without her time in the mental hospital, and yet she was coping. No doubt she would need some serious therapy but that was understandable.

They were interrupted by the doorbell. "Who's that?" asked Lorne.

Angel switched the TV on and pressed a button. A video image of Dr Lansing appeared.

Buffy began to shiver.

Angel turned to her. "Go upstairs, get in bed and look like your sleeping, got it?" Buffy nodded. "Kathy, go with her and look like you're on watch."

Both women left the room.

Angel shared a look with Lorne. "I don't know about you but I've been dieing for a talk with the good doctor."

Lorne placed a restraining hand on his arm. "Be calm. We have no proof yet. Let me handle it, we'll see if he can't dig his own grave for us."

Angel nodded. But resisting the urge to hit him would be hard.

Angel answered the door.

"Mr O'Connor, I'm sorry to disturb you, I was simply worried about Buffy. Is she OK?"

"Her new doctor is here now. Why don't you ask him?" He said gesturing for him to enter. Angel let him through to Lorne who was sitting at the kitchen table, going through Buffy's notes from Sunny Hill.

Lorne looked up as they entered and Angel introduced them.

Lorne shook his hand. "It's good to finally meet you doctor. After reading this file I feel like I already know you."

The Doctor looked uncomfortable. "Thank you. I just came to see how Buffy was."

"Stable. That's about all we can say. But I'm glad you're here, there are a few things I wanted to talk to you about."

"Really? What?"

Lorne sat down and gestured for the doctor to do the same. He glanced towards the hidden tape recorder to make sure it still wasn't visable. Angel watched them both from the doorway.

"Firstly these lacerations that were on Buffy's back when she was admitted." Lorne began. "I know it wasn't to your clinic but I was hoping you would have an idea as to what caused them."

"They were nearly healed when she was first admitted, old wounds. And no she never told me what had caused them, other than vampires."

"Umm, OK." Lorne looked over his notepad. "During your therapy, did you ever formulate any theories as to why Buffy was creating this internal world?"

"Nothing concrete. It's my opinion though that she just wasn't built to withstand life. We have a few cases like that, they don't have the stability to live life. Some commit suicide, others have various mental disorders. This was Buffy's way of coping."

"What led you to that conclusion?"

"I'm sorry, I don't see the relevance of this questioning." Said the doctor harshly.

Lorne looked hurt. "I'm sorry doctor. I didn't mean to offend you. It's just that you've been her primary carer for almost seven years when I've been it for a day, I just wanted your insights."

The doctor looked relived. "No, I'm the one who should apologise. I reached that conclusion for two reasons. One, her symptoms didn't seem to have a cause and two, teenage years are when these types of problems normally set in."

Lorne nodded. "I agree. Now, you were her primary carer but Dr..." he looked over to his notes again "Hooper was the consultant over seeing her care, yes?"

"That's right, he's my superior."

"But he wasn't directly involved in treatment decisions?"

"Not unless I asked him to be."

"OK, Well thank you Doctor. You've been a big help."

"That's quite alright." He paused briefly. "Um, may I see her?"

"Buffy?" asked Lorne.

"Yes, just to check she's OK. You know."

"I don't see why not. But there hasn't been any change, it hardly seems worth it."

"Still, I'd like to look in on her."

"OK." Lorne stood up and led the way.

The door to Buffy's room was open, Buffy lay in bed, facing away from the door, Kathy was sitting under the window, reading. She stood up and went to see them at the door.

"How is she?" asked Lorne.

"The same, she hasn't moved since I dressed her."

Dr Lansing approached the bed. "Buffy. It's Dr Lansing. I just came to check you were OK."

Buffy remained still. So the doctor turned back to them. "You will let me know wont you, if there's any progress?"

"Rest assured you'll be the first to know."

The doctor cast one last look at Buffy then left, thanking them for their time.

Once the doctor had gone Angel went over to Buffy.

"It's OK, he's gone."

"Thank god." She said in a small voice.

"Do you remember what he did to you? Why you fear him?"

Buffy sat up in bed. "I'm not sure. It's hard to distinguish between fact and fiction these last few years. But I have these dreams where he's whispering to me. Whispering things I don't like. I can't make out what he's saying but I know it's bad. He wants to hurt me or take someone from me."

Lorne listened from the doorway, thinking.

Chapter 13

A few hours later Angel lay on Buffy's bed with her. They were talking about happier times as children.

"Do you remember that awful party dress my mom got me?"

Angel smiled at the memory. "How could I not?"

"God, I looked like the Pillsbury Dough Boy in pink."

"You always looked gorgeous."

"Liar... but Go on."

"You know you were gorgeous. No one ever held a candle to you, even if you did look like the dough boy." He smirked.

Buffy hit his arm playfully. "That's just mean."

Buffy's smile faded. "We had some great times didn't we?"

"We did."

"I missed you after you left."

"I missed you too. Every day. Sometimes the only think that kept me going was the memory of our last night together."

Buffy remembered. The night before he had been due to leave she had gone to his apartment to tell him she understood. They had talked for a long while, they had kissed for even longer. Somehow they ended up in bed together.

Buffy had never regretted that night but she had always wondered if Angel had. She was relived to hear it was as special to him as it had been to her.

"I love you."

Angel kissed her forehead. "I love you too."

Willow and Xander came by later with Cordie in tow. They hadn't told her why she was needed, just that she had to come.

"What's this about?" she asked Angel as she opened the door.

"Cordelia, good to see you."

"Good to see me my ass. They pulled me out of a meeting with a very up and coming artist for this. He's never going to let me sell his pictures now!"

Buffy came to the door to see what the commotion was. "Hey Cordie."

"Oh my... That's... Your." Cordie looked around from willow, to Xander to Angel, seeking conformation from each of them. Finally realising it was real she barged past Angel and hugged her. "Buffy!"

Cordelia was quickly brought up to date on the facts, along with Willow and Xander on the more recent developments. Angel explained everything to them, Buffy sat quietly, not speaking.

"I'm expecting the criminal records and history's to arrive soon. Mel called an hour ago to say they were being couriered over."

"What are we looking for?" asked Willow.

"Anyone with a record for violent assault, they could be a suspect. With Dr Lansing, he just tweaks my antenna, I don't trust him."

While they waited for the files to be delivered Angel made coffee and everyone chatted. The conversation was slightly stilted but Buffy enjoyed it. It was normal. And that's what she wanted to be. Normal again.

The doorbell went and Angel answered it. He signed for the papers and everyone took a stack to check through.

"Umm." Said Lorne.

"What?" asked Angel.

"This Doctor, he doesn't have a history. There is a Dr Lansing listed as attending Chicago med school but he's 75."

"Where does Lansing say he went?"

"Chicago."

"So he's probably using this guys ID. How far back can we trace him?"

Lorne flicked through. "We have employment records going back 8 years." He checked again. "Nothing before that."

Angel pondered that, was he even a real doctor?

"Cordie, where are we on the records?" Cordie looked up and collected the notes from Willow and Xander. "Well our year wasn't good for the crime stats that's for sure. We have two convicted of armed robbery, three for theft or shoplifting. One convicted of fraud. Five have relatives with convictions, but no one here with any sexual assault."

"What about the relatives?"

Cordie checked again. "Um, Graham Palmer, brother Jason, theft. Gary Cooper, stepbrother of Christine Cooper, um convicted of breaking and entering, Sally Mayer, sister of Colin convicted of DUI and Martin Lockwood and Peter Lockwood, brother and father respectively of John. Father was convicted of assault with intent to kill, brother, attempted rape."

"Let me see those."

Cordie put her pad down and began rifling though the files. She pulled out two photocopied sheets and handed them to Angel.

He looked at them and his face turned ashen. He handed them to Lorne.

"It was John's party Tyler took me to." Buffy said quietly.

Chapter 14

The next day Angel watched from across the road as John Lockwood worked. He was employed as a mechanic in downtown LA.

"It's him alright." Said Cordie.

The background search had found no current connection between him and his brother or father. It turned out he wasn't Peter Lockwood's natural son, rather his stepson who had taken his mothers new name. He had now reverted to Fox, his birth name.

Peter Lockwood was Dr Paul Lansing, the photo on Lockwood's file confirmed that. As far as they could trace he had changed his identity eight years ago when rape charges were pending against him. He and his family had moved to LA. They were unsure if he still had contact with his family in LA but one thing was certain, he had obviously used his position to protect his son from the authorities after Buffy's attack.

He had no medical training but appeared to be bright and had an interest in medicine and psychology. Obviously he knew enough not to draw suspicions.

Angel was growing impatient. He needed to know what had happened to Buffy that night, John was the only one who might be able to answer that.

At 6pm he left work. Angel pulled out from the roadside and rushed ahead. They knew where he lived, they would now lie in wait for him.

John Lockwood didn't notice anything unusual as he got out of his truck. He was exhausted and wanted nothing more than a cold beer. He didn't get it though because before he could put his key in the lock, Angel and Xander wrestled him to the floor.

Angel had his revolver with him, to ensure cooperation although he hadn't loaded it.

Angel took the key and opened the door while Xander bundled John inside. They sat him in an armchair and Angel began the interrogation.

They kept the room dark so he wouldn't see their faces. They had a torch to show him the gun and shine in his face. His expression said he would cooperate. Angel turned the tape recorder on.

"What do you want?" he asked.

"I want to hear about your 15th birthday party." Said Angel.

"What? That's some kind of joke right?"

"No, tell me about it. Or more accurately, tell me what happened to Buffy summers at your 15th birthday party."

Johns face dropped. "Oh god." He put his head in his hands. "I didn't know. Not then. I swear, if I'd know what they were I would never have had anyone over."

"It's OK, just tell me what happened."

"I... I didn't see anything but I found her. She was passed out, in the basement. Hurt. I went to a pay phone to call 911."

"Why didn't you use the house phone?"

"I didn't know the bastard was a rapist but I knew he was scary. If he knew I'd called he'd have beaten me. He was in hiding so calling the police was a big no no."

"OK, go on."

John took a deep breath. "I watched as the ambulance took her away. I didn't know what had happened. I waited until the police left. When I went back in I told Peter, or Paul as he was calling himself then, I told him I'd taken a friend home and saw the ambulance on the way back." He swallowed. "He told me never to mention it again, he held a knife to my throat and said he was never there, if anyone asked he wasn't in the house that night."

He was visibly shaking at the memory. "He was a scary man, I believed him. He wasn't big scary he was… was kind of cold scary, his eyes were blank, no emotion. I wasn't in the house when the ambulance was there so the police never questioned me. Thank god. They asked Mom all kinds of questions though but she knew the drill. Said she lived there alone with us two. Told them she had been there all evening, and she'd seen us there all evening. She said she had no idea how Buffy got down there, or who had done it but that there were some older boys who crashed the party. She didn't recognise them but thought they might have been from a gang. " He swallowed again. "They believed her. I guess with Buffy incoherent they dropped it."

"So what happened after they left?"

"I went in, Peter threatened me. I went to bed. Marty was there. He told me he and his dad had had a party. He told me… Told me…" John broke down and sobbed. "I swear I had no idea they were like that."

"But you still didn't tell?"

"I was petrified. After he got through with his story I believed even more that they wouldn't hesitate to kill me."

Angel made him go into detail about what had happened. Lorne said he needed it to treat Buffy. John couldn't see it but both Angel and Xander were holding back tears behind the torchlight. John also sobbed. This was the first time he had ever recounted the story.

"Where there others?" Angel asked with a sinking feeling.

"Never at the house. But sometimes they came back together all happy and laughing. I eventually figured out it meant they had done something. Hurt someone."

When he'd finished Angel asked. "What of Peter's other life, as Paul?"

"We didn't know much about it. We, well I was told to call him Paul in public, not that we ever went anywhere. If anyone asked I didn't have a father or stepfather, we were a single parent family. I gathered from his talks with mum that he was working in a hospital. I thought he might be a lab assistant or something."

"Where's your brother now?"

"He's living somewhere in southern California. Last I heard he was shacked up with some woman. That was years ago though. I was still at home. I ran away when I was 18. Haven't seen any of them since. Including Peter or Paul or whatever he's calling himself these days."

"Do you have a picture of him?"

"I uh, I dunno. I have a few old pictures, mainly of mom and me. Check that draw in the dresser, on the right. If there is one it'll be in there."

Angel looked and found a picture of the four of them at a fast food restaurant. Smiling, happy. The camera did lie.

With everything they needed Angel stood up. "This isn't over. The police will be contacting you soon. Cooperate with them. We're going to bring him down and if you don't cooperate, you'll go down with him."

"I... I don't know what to say. I'm sorry. I really am. I should have put a stop to it then. But I wasn't strong enough. I was weak."

Angel wanted to deck the bastard for his weakness but he didn't, they would need him. "Just be strong now."

"I... I will. I promise."

Angel and Xander left to return to Cordie in the car. As they shut the door they herd a broken man sobbing behind them.

Chapter 15

Lorne listened to the to the tape in horror. Buffy had not just been raped, she had been tortured. Some things turned his stomach. Still, he listened. By understanding Buffy's ordeal he could help her deal with it. Angel sat with him, listening again. He didn't cry this time, he let his rage build up instead.

That bastard had not only raped her, he had used his position and knowledge to shut her up.

Angel was sure there were others, probably some still in the clinic under his "care". But that was up to the police now to find them.

Angel had destroyed the police files he had. The police had them anyway and it could get their informant in trouble.

Mel had tracked Martin Lockwood down to a trailer park. Somewhere along the line he and dad must have fallen out because there was no contact they could trace.

Angel shut the tape off as it finished.

Lorne sighed and sat back. "We have a long road ahead of us."

"Can she get over this?"

"Yes, she's strong. She will be OK again, if not quite the vivacious girl she was."

"Is she up to talking to the police?"

"Yes, she assures me she is. She wants this finished as much as we do."

"I'll make the call."

Detective Robins arrived fifteen minutes later with two deputies and a rape specialist named Sarah Croft. Robins looked over the evidence Angel had collected while his colleague interviewed Buffy.

At the end of looking through everything he sighed. "Just when I think I've seen every perversion known to man, another one crawls out of the woodwork." He sighed and stood up. He offered his hand to angel. "Thank you sir. I'll have to confer with my captain but I'd say they'll be arrested before the day is out."

"Good to know."

Sarah and Buffy emerged from the study. Buffy had been crying again, not surprisingly.

"Sir, Buffy's memory of the events is sketchy at best. I have reassured her that her rape kit is still on file though, just waiting for a match. She shouldn't need to testify."

The detective nodded. "It's open and shut alright. Even more so with this." He said pointing to Angels box of evidence. He sighed again. "God damn bastards."

The detective said his goodbyes and left with Angel's evidence.

Angel called Joyce and Hank next, this would be all over the news by tonight. Buffy's name wouldn't be made public but they would easily know it was their daughter.

They arrived and were a little shocked to say the least at Buffy remarkable recovery.

As Angel explained the situation to them Joyce began to cry.

"We thought it was best to leave you there, we thought they were doing everything they could. I'm sorry Buffy, I'm so sorry."

Reassurances were made all round and they eventually left when Buffy said she was tired.

Alone for the first time Buffy and Angel sat down together.

"How do you feel?" asked Angel.

"Unreal. It's all so..."

"Unreal?"

She smiled, "Yeah. It feels good though. I think I did the right thing."

Angel kissed the top of her head. "I do too."

Angel received a call to say the Lockwood's had both been arrested.

"Good." Was Buffy's only comment.

They shared a late night snack then went to bed. They still shared Buffy's bed but nothing romantic happened.

Chapter 16

Over the next week Buffy enrolled in an adult education class to gain her high school diploma. She wasn't as out of practice as she thought and soon picked up the rhythm of schoolwork again.

She saw her parents and friends a few times and although she still felt out of her depth in most situations, she coped.

She also saw Lorne once a day for her therapy. As well as therapy he taught her relaxation techniques and skills for coping with the new world. Gradually, as Buffy felt ready, they would try hypnotism to regain some of her lost memories.

Angel went back to work part time. He still officially had the rest of the month off but he thought it best not to always be around Buffy, he feared he might crowd her. He used the time to help put to together the case suing Sunny Hill.

About two weeks later Angel received a call from Detective Robins.

"I just thought you'd like to know what's happening." He began.

"I would."

"Well we have a total of five victims from Sunny Hill. They like Buffy, don't remember much, seems hallucinogens were his form of date rape drug. They are receiving help though and we have DNA evidence in four of those cases. We also have seven unsolved cases fro the LA area. Three are linked to both, two are liked to Martin and another two to Peter. We suspect others but these are the ones we can link to his for now. We're looking into other cases from after they split up."

"Martin's turning states evidence isn't he?" said Angel. He knew the legal profession like the back of his hand.

Robbins sighed. "Yes, he is. That's why we're looking into other cases he committed alone. He can still be tried and convicted of those."

"Good."

"He had been helpful to us though, in telling us Peter Lockwood's methods." Angel didn't reply so the detective continued. "It appears he would drug a victim by spiking her drink with what ever he had, usually LSD. Once she became disorientated he or his father would separate her from the group, take her somewhere private. They then raped her knowing a positive ID would be hard because if the drugs and because of this they wouldn't be caught by DNA. If they weren't a suspect they wouldn't even be tested."

He sighed again. "He also told us about Buffy's case specifically. I gather from Martins step brother you already know what happened the night of his party."

Angel was about to deny the knowledge when Robins spoke again.

"Don't bother. I know it was you. And for what it's worth I wish I could conduct a few interviews at gun point. Anyway, on the night of the dance in the school gym Martin tried again to drug her but it looks like as the drugs began to take effect she saw him as a vampire again, a threat to her. I don't know if it was just him she saw as a threat or everyone but that's why she set fire to the gym. Once in Sunny Hill Peter took over her care, as he volunteered to do for all his victims. In Buffy's case he built up on the fantasy she had created. Martin says he would alter her world by playing a suggestion over and over at night on a tape recorder. The tapes for Buffy usually included the line, 'you aren't real' to drive her deeper into her fantasy. I gather from her psychiatrist that was a line she used a few times with you. The hope was to crush Buffy, completely."

"Buffy remembers hearing his voice, she had nightmares about it."

"He... He also continued assaulting her. We don't believe he raped her again, it was too big a risk for him but he did indecently assault her according to Martin."

Angel sighed. "OK, thank you detective."

"I'm truly sorry about all this."

"I know. Everyone's sorry."

"At least she wont have to face a trial." It was something but not much in the scheme of things.

"How is she?" Robbins asked.

"She's doing well. She's enrolled in school again."

"Good. She's a wonderful girl."

"She is that."

During the next month Buffy continued attending her classes. She was doing well, keeping up with it. She also began self-defence classes and took a cooking class.

Her first few efforts were disasters but slowly she improved and could manage to cook most things without burning them.

Angel returned to work but Buffy kept herself busy. She bought a car with what remained of her college fund. Most of it had been eaten away by her bills but she had enough to get an old car. Angel paid for her driving lessons.

She hated taking money from him, he had done so much already but he had assured her she could pay him back with her settlement from the hospital when it came through. Buffy was happier thinking of it as a loan.

Her sessions with Lorne were still daily. He refused to take payment for them saying he would have one hell of a paper to write from this experience. She had had two hypnotisms so far that had brought a lot back to her. She knew there would always be things she couldn't remember but she wouldn't hide from the ones she could.

She and Angel became a couple again, this time they could be open about it. Still nothing sexual happened and Buffy knew it wouldn't until she was ready.

About two months after the Lockwood's were arrested Buffy arrived home tired. Angel wasn't there but she hadn't expected him to be, he had a late meeting. She showered and changed into her nightclothes, washing the day off.

Life was going well. More importantly her cooking was improving. She went down into the kitchen to get dinner started.

Angel received a disturbing phone call from Robbins that same evening. Peter Lockwood had escaped from custody.

Angel was furious and petrified at the same time. He immediately hung up and called Buffy at home. The line was dead. He grabbed his jacket and ran for his car.

Chapter 17

"You bitch!"

Buffy's blood turned to ice as she heard that voice again. It had a slight southern drawl to it but was unmistakably the same voice.

"Thought you could outsmart me did you? Well you didn't. I got out."

Buffy turned to face him. He was standing in the doorway, grinning at her. He looked haggard.

She wondered briefly is she was dreaming but she knew this was real. Somewhere deep inside she knew it was real.

"What's the matter? Not so talkative now are you? You were singing like a birdie not to long ago."

"Leave now or I will kill you." Said Buffy.

He laughed. "I don't think so little lady."

He approached her slowly. Buffy felt rooted to the spot, her self defence training all but forgotten. He stopped inches away from her.

He leaned into Buffy and breathed in deeply. "I been waiting so long for another taste of this. You smell so good."

Suddenly Buffy kneed him in the crotch. He doubled over but caught her arm as she ran. She pulled herself out of his grip and headed for the stairs.

He was right in her tail though "You'll pay for that bitch!" he said as he grabbed her ankle. Buffy fell on the stairs and kicked him in the head three times before he released his grip.

She carried on up the stairs, heading for the master bedroom. She knew where Angel kept the gun and that was her destination.

She entered the bedroom and slammed the door, locking it behind her. It was just a privacy lock though, it wouldn't keep him out for long.

"I know you're in there princess. I'm comin' in."

Buffy had the gun out as he kicked the door for the first time. It wasn't loaded and she fumbled with the bullets, trying to get them into the chamber.

"We both know you were asking for it. You weren't even a virgin, you think we didn't notice that you whore!"

Another kick, Buffy heard wood splinter but the door didn't give.

"I know all about women like you, you like it rough then you go crying rape." Another kick and the door gave way. Buffy turned to face him as he entered the room.

"No where to run now is there?" he said grinning.

"I'm through running."

His smile widened.

Buffy brought up the gun. "Goodbye Dr Lansing."

She shot him three times in the chest before falling to the floor herself, sobbing.

Angel burst in and took one look at the body before rushing to Buffy.

"Oh God, are you OK?" Buffy nodded.

"I just... I just can't stop crying." She sobbed.

Angel held her in his arms as the sirens approached.

Thankfully the next day was a Saturday so Angel could be with Buffy. He decided to take her house hunting.

That house held too many memories now, besides, he couldn't live there forever.

Buffy was surprisingly upbeat.

"I just feel like this weight has gone." She explained.

Angel smiled. Perhaps in some weird twisted way this had helped Buffy. A cathartic experience perhaps.

They looked around four places until Buffy found one she liked.

It was on the coast again, along the cliff top. It was five bedroom with two bathrooms, two reception rooms, a study and a dining room.

Angel would use the study for his work and Buffy would use the fifth bedroom for her studies.

Buffy was unsure though. She would still be living off Angel which she didn't like. She felt like she was using him.

Angel took her for a walk in the garden to convince her.

"Buffy. I know we've been going slowly, and I don't have a problem with that, what ever you need. But rest assured, one day you will be my wife and legally own half of this."

Buffy turned to him. "What?"

Angel grew fearful, perhaps he had revealed too much and pressured her. "I want you to marry me Buffy. When ever your ready to."

"I... I... Oh. Wow."

"Is that a good wow or a bad wow?" asked Angel.

"It's good, it's all good. I just. I didn't dare hope you still wanted me."

Angel hugged her. "I've never stopped wanting you and I never will."

They put an offer in on the house.

Chapter 18

Three months later Buffy was a rich woman, her compensation claim against the hospital left her with almost $5,000,000. She was glad. It means she had security. The other victims of Sunny Hill had all received similar amounts.

Angel had suggested suing the department of corrections for letting Lockwood escape but Buffy wasn't greedy. She didn't want to live off compensations claims for the rest of her life. They were holding an enquiry into the matter and she was satisfied with that.

Angel found her reading on the patio of their new home, she was wearing her swimming costume, trying to catch some rays. He leaned over from behind and kissed her.

"Umm. Hi." She said.

"Hi back. What you reading?"

"It's for school. It's deathly dull."

"Maybe I can find something better for us to do." he said playfully.

Buffy put her book down. "Better than Dickens?"

"Much better." He sat beside her on the sun lounger and captured her mouth in a kiss.

"Well it was good." Buffy said. "Maybe you should publish it."

"Maybe I should. But then you'd have to share me."

Buffy grabbed his shirt and pulled him into another kiss. "Never." She whispered.

They stayed there kissing for what seemed like hours and ended up with Buffy sitting on Angels lap.

Buffy pulled away briefly and looked into his eyes. Without breaking their gaze she found his hand and placed it on her breast.

Angel looked questioningly at her. She began to unbutton his shirt and kiss his chest.

Angel was gentle and took his time. The though of hurting Buffy was more than he could bear. Buffy seemed eager though and so they made love, tenderly, on the patio.

When they were finished Buffy lay beside him on the sun lounger.

They sat silently for a while as Buffy traced circles on his chest.

"Thank you." Buffy said quietly. "For everything. If it hadn't been for you I'd still be trapped in my own world."

Angel kissed her lightly.

Fourteen months after Buffy's recovery she graduated high school and was enrolled in UCLA.

She decided to train as a psychotherapist. The irony wasn't lost on her but she wanted above all to help people.

Her sessions with Lorne were now weekly and he and Kathy had become firm friends.

Buffy and Angel married during the Easter break in a small wedding with just family and close friends.

They vacationed in Hawaii, two weeks of sun, surf and sand. It was heaven.

Buffy other life was a distant memory now. She had come a long way.

Three years after that Buffy was working as a psychotherapist. She had converted her study room into her office and saw patients there.

Angel had left the firm and set up his own small practice.

Neither had to work, Angel had saved and invested wisely and Buffy had her compensation. They worked because they wanted to. Both doing their bit to make the world better.

He had to scale back his working commitments though. Buffy was six months pregnant with their first child and Angel was determined to be there for him.

He missed the pace of a large law firm sometimes but he just had to look at Buffy's smiling face to know he had made the right decision.

The End