He was still sitting in the dark holding on to the picture and the scrap of material when he heard a discreet tap on his door.

"Mr. Heath," Silas whispered, they's almost finished with dinner."

"Thank you Silas" he returned and quietly replaced the picture in the drawer and the material in his wallet. He then rejoined them in the dining room for coffee.

"That was quick," Nick remarked.

"Yep. Didn't figure it would take to long," he said. "Coffee sure is good."

"Probably feels real good to you. Warm, after whatever you did outside," Audra said, fishing for information. "It's getting colder nightly."

"Think it will freeze?" Heath asked.

"No," Nick responded. "Probably just keep up with this infernal raining. I'm sick of it. Couldn't believe it started again just after you got back. From the looks of the clouds, it will keep this up for days."

"Reckon you're right. Guess we'll be wading again." Heath added.

"Well, I for one, am going to work from home for the next week. I don't fancy the idea of riding back and forth in the rain, and I don't want to miss out on the family time before Christmas, by staying over in Stockton," Jarrod said.

"Oh good, Jarrod. That's wonderful news." Victoria exclaimed.

"I know I'll be happy too. I bet I can find lots of worthwhile projects for you to do," Audra dimpled.

"Wait a minute. I did say I'd be working," Jarrod replied, grinning back at her.

"Can we stop this conversation and go light the tree now?" Nick asked.

"I'm up for it," Heath happily put in, and Victoria was once again struck by the little boy enthusiasm and wistfulness in his tone.

Unable to deny him anything, when he sounded so young, she decided to forgo her second cup of coffee, and said, "Let's do it right this minute." Rising she led the way to the tree.

"Finally!" Nick said as enthusiastically as Heath had a moment before.

Pulling out a package of long fireplace matches, Nick handed one to Jarrod and one to Heath. Each lit the matches and then began working on a different section of the tree, lighting the candles from the top down, as Audra and Victoria watched carefully for any hint of a misplaced candle that might start a fire. As the men reached the bottom, Victoria said, "You and Heath did a wonderful job. Not one candle had to be moved for safety reasons."

"May I extinguish the lamps now Mother?" Audra asked.

"Of course, dear," she said as Jarrod, Nick, and Heath moved to stand by her. Just as Audra blew out the last light, Jarrod slipped a hand around Victoria's shoulder and said "It's as lovely as always, Mother."

Victoria replied, "Yes it is," and even Nick agreed quietly, as if a loud noise would ruin the moment.

Heath's quiet sigh, caused Victoria to glance at him and thought that in the shadows cast by the flickering candles she saw a little boy that wanted to shout but was trying to behave politely. She saw Tom. Every Christmas was this way for him. He relished the holidays.

"Well we should probably blow the candles out before the tree catches fire" Jarrod said, ever practical.

"Can you wait a minute Jarrod?"

"Sure, Heath."

"Excuse me then," Heath said and opened the front door. They all watched, confused as he went an d stood in the rain and stared at the tree through the window. They continued to watch, as he continued to stand, getting drenched, for at least five minutes, before he returned and said "Thank you."

With that, Jarrod and Nick extinguished the candles, while Heath, still wet, moved to the parlor and helped himself to a whiskey.

"Heath?" Victoria questioned.

"Probably want to know what in the world I was doing. Right?"

"The thought crossed my mind," she said, as she moved to stand next to him.

"I was just getting the answers to some questions."

"Mind if I ask what questions?"

"Mostly just, does it shine as bright as the night sky. Can I get you a drink?"

Shaking her head no, she added, "I always find it incredible too. I don't want people to talk. I just want to drink in its beauty. Maybe next year I'll join you outside."

With a huge smile, he said, "I think I'd like that."

He left to change his clothes and returned as the rest of the family was gathering.

"Anybody up for cards?" Nick questioned.

"We can't yet son, unless you don't want to hang your stocking tonight." Victoria laughed, knowing that hanging the stockings was Nick's favorite part of Christmas after decorating the cookies. She knew he was disappointed that the cookies had been ruined, and she hoped to still surprise the family with cookies to decorate, but finding time this close to Christmas would be hard. Nick and Heath both needed to focus on the ranch.

"Stockings. Well why didn't you say so," Nick responded enthusiastically. "Where are they? Can we start now?"

"I'll get them Nick, can you get the nails?"

"Back in a minute with the nails Mother. Want to race?" he cheerfully questioned.

"Can I place a bet on the outcome?" Heath joked.

"Only if the good odds are on Mother, and I get a piece of the action," Jarrod responded.

Laughing, Victoria and Nick went to perform their tasks, Victoria returning a good five minutes before a wet Nick returned from the work shed. "Well here they are, now where is my stocking?" he said grabbing the pile from Victoria's hand and locating his.

"Hey sis, here's yours," he called tossing it to her. "Mother, Jarrod, yours," he said again, as he tossed Jarrod's to him and handed Victoria hers. "And this one must be yours Heath," he added tossing it to him.

"But I don't....." he said bewildered as Victoria said, "You didn't think we'd let you celebrate Christmas without a stocking did you?"

"I didn't think," he said tilting his head to look at it closely. It was a green satin, the color of the outdoors, and it had a hand embroidered winter scene stitched on the front, of trees, a pond, and a mountain in the background. It was soft, shiny, elegant, and his! As he was examining his stocking, Nick was busy hammering the nails into the holes in the mantlepiece. Heath had always wondered about the holes, but never asked, and now he knew why they were there.

Suddenly, Nick cursed, as he pounded the last nail in the hole. He removed all the nails he just put in. Except for the first one, and started over. It was obvious that he needed to add an extra nail this year and the spacing was off. It didn't take Nick long to re do the nails and his face looked pleased at his efforts as he placed his stocking on the third peg.

Heath decided to go last. They might just have an order to this and he didn't want his picked up and moved somewhere else.

Victoria placed her's on the first nail, and Jarrod placed his between Nick's and his Mothers.

Nick said "Go ahead Audra. Hang yours." when he noticed her confused expression.

"Should I hang mine next to yours Nick, like I always do, or leave a space for Heath since he's older than me?"

"Birth order, Sis," Jarrod called. "You know your always last."

"Jarrod, on second thought, I think I will keep you busy helping me out with the orphanage Christmas plans," she said taking the last nail in line.

Heath moved up and happily hung his on the only remaining nail. No errors this time.

"Now the home looks finished," Nick said. "Never feels right to me without the stockings up. I just love Christmas morning. Stockings are the best."

"You've always felt that way, Nick." Victoria said, smiling happily at her strong son. It was wonderful to see him still enjoy a child's delight, when he was so focused and serious most of the year. Stuffing his stocking, was always fun for her, as he delighted in every little item. The more she could get in it the happier he was. For some reason, dumping it out, all at once, and seeing the abundance of toys and gifts surround him, gave him immense pleasure. He acted like a little boy just allowed into a candy shop and handed a dollar, picking up first one item, then another, then back again and again. Christmas and stockings equaled Nick.

She looked at her family. Jarrod was pouring drinks for everyone, as he and Nick conversed. Audra had gotten out her needlework, and Heath was quietly sitting on the couch shuffling a deck of cards. She briefly wondered what he was thinking and if she would ever hear about his Christmases, or at least more than bits and pieces. As she stood observing, the room rearranged itself as Nick went and stood by the mantle and Jarrod brought Heath a glass of whiskey as they began to softly converse.

She moved to talk with Nick and thank him for his help with the ornaments.

"You're welcome Mother," he responded quietly.

"Is something wrong? You seemed so relaxed a few minutes ago."

"Just curious. Do you wonder what they are talking about?" he said, inclining his head slightly to indicate Heath and Jarrod.

"I hadn't given it any thought. I just assumed that it was talk like you and he have, or you and Jarrod do. Why?"

"Really, just curious. Sometimes Heath is so hard to reach, and I wonder if Jarrod has more luck getting information out of him than I do."

"You and Heath are very close, and get on well."

"Yes we do, but he doesn't confide."

"And you do?"

"Point taken, Mother," he chuckled.

"Give him time Nick. He's opening up slowly."

"I know. Sometimes I just wish he'd talk, you know, not be so quiet, so I knew what he was thinking."

"Me too, son. Me too."

As they shared their drink in silence, Jarrod was asking Heath about the stocking and if he liked it. Seeing Heath, earlier, run his hands over the stocking brought back memories of another night, a few weeks ago, when he caught Heath holding the orphans stockings late at night.

"Do you like your stocking Heath?"

"Yep."

"Mother made it for you."

"Yep."

There were the one word answers again, and he was tired of them. "Heath, if you're unhappy, tell me why." he insisted.

"Jarrod..." he began, then stopped. Jarrod just waited, not saying a word, then ever so quietly he heard Heath say, "Jarrod, I never had a stocking before. Can't believe I have one now. I think I must be in shock," he threw in to lighten the moment when he realized what he'd said. Damn Jarrod and his lawyer tricks. He didn't see how anyone ever beat him in a lawyer case. He could probably get a deaf mute to understand and start talking again, just by looking at him in that lawyerly way of his, and he said as much to Jarrod.

Laughing at the image, Jarrod probed, "No stocking Heath? I don't understand."

"Nothing to understand. Let's pretend I didn't say anything."

"If that's what you want Heath." he said, wondering if Heath could have been so poor that he didn't have a stocking, or if Heath was fooling him. Everyone had stockings. "Well this rain has probably really hurt the levees," he said, changing the subject so Heath would feel more comfortable, and was pleased to see the look of gratitude Heath flashed his way, as he expanded on the new topic.

Before long, Audra called it a night, and everyone else claimed that they should head to bed as well.

Victoria watched as her three sons climbed the stairs, then taking a good long look at the house, dressed in it's finery for Christmas, she blew out the lamps, and headed to her own room for a restful night filled with pleasant dreams.

It wasn't restful however, and she tossed and turned, not really able to sleep. Her mind was to preoccupied to allow it. Finally deciding that she had enough, she got up, threw on her dressing gown, and went downstairs for a cup of tea. That usually calmed her down. When she reached the kitchen, she put a pot of water on to boil and got out her favorite china cup and saucer. As she waited for the water to boil, she got the sugar and a teaspoon from the drawer, when Silas popped his head out from his room, asking if she needed his help. She said no, and that he should go back to sleep, that she just needed some quiet time. Pouring the water over the tea bag, she stirred in some sugar and waited for it to steep. Realizing that she could drink all the tea in the world and still not go to sleep she decided to see if Jarrod was up. Being alone wasn't working. She needed to talk things over with someone, and Jarrod would be her first choice. Often times she was finding that Heath was a good person to talk to when troubled, but he wouldn't do tonight, as he was indirectly why she was troubled.

Surprised, but thrilled to see the light on in Jarrod's study, she knocked lightly and then entered when she heard him beckon.

"Mother, what are you doing up? Couldn't you sleep?" he said laying aside the book he was reading.

"No Jarrod, I couldn't. What about yourself. You went to bed, I didn't expect to find you up."

"One might assume there was a full moon tonight, but you're right. I couldn't sleep either."

"Want to talk about it Jarrod?" Victoria questioned, hoping his problems might take her mind off its troubles for awhile.

"I would like to, but I'm not sure if I should."

"Is this about a case Jarrod? I didn't realize you were handling anything specific right now."

"No Mother, its something I was told, but then asked to forget. It, of course, concerns Heath, and it has me upset, but he did ask that I didn't mention it."

'He actually asked you not to mention it? That doesn't sound like Heath. More like Nick actually."

"Well, come to think of it, his exact words were, "Lets pretend I didn't say anything." I guess that I can mention it, as technically he didn't ask that I don't bring it up."

"Well Jarrod, what is bothering you that Heath wants forgotten"

"He said he didn't have a stocking Mother. He tried to act like it wasn't a big deal, but I could read the sadness in his eyes. You know, I am beginning to notice just how expressive his eyes are."

"Didn't have a stocking, Jarrod. How did you get him to admit that. He clams up when asked about his life, and he never tries to say anything about his poverty."

"It just slipped out. I could tell he was mortified that he'd said it. Do you really think that he meant never? I have a hard time believing he was so poor that he never had a stocking. I know his life wasn't easy, but to be a child and never have a stocking, I can really not understand. How do we give him what he should have had all along? I feel guilty that we can't make up for the time he lost, by Father not knowing about him. I'm angry at his mother, for not notifying our father. I don't want to see him hurt any more. Being powerless to help someone doesn't sit well with me."

As Jarrod finished his thoughts, and Victoria began hers, Heath headed toward the open doorway, hoping to find Jarrod up and willing to talk. Approaching the door he heard voices, and he turned to give them their privacy, when the few overheard words stopped him cold.

"Jarrod, Victoria said, you must remember that this isn't our fault any more than it is Heath's. We are helping him as much as he is allowing us to. Everyone is trying to make him feel part of the holidays. I was feeling guilty over the manger. I didn't want him there Jarrod. Gosh, but it feels good to have said that to you. I needed to get it out. I am so mixed up. He reminds me so much of Tom, in some ways. Having him here this Christmas is a lot harder than I expected. I didn't realize that I was as selfish as I am. Oh I love him Jarrod, make no mistake about it, but it would be so much easier if he wasn't here this Christmas.......

There it was. What he had been waiting for. It finally happened. He was a burden to the one person that he admired above all others. He vowed he would give her a special present for Christmas. He would give her the gift of his absence. Barely able to return upstairs, as his knees felt to weak to walk,

and his heart felt like it would explode in his chest, he stumbled back up the stairs and into his room, closing the door behind him.

........I don't mean that I don't want him here. I do. You know that this is harder on him than it is on us. I just want to be able to tell him how much he looks like his father, how alike their mannerisms are, and how much I loved his father, your father, my Tom. When I see him, especially right now, during the holidays, that your father loved so much, I miss Tom more than ever. How do you explain to someone, that you love them all the more, for causing you pain. How do I explain to a man that won't talk, that he is very special. Jarrod, he has been a blessing from the first day he walked in here. Nick depends on him, Audra cherishes him, you gain perspective from him, and I received a son. Another walking reminder of my husband. How could I not want to have included him in the manger?" she said crying.

Moving swiftly to his mothers side, Jarrod sat next to her, and she leaned into him for strength, understanding, and forgiveness. "Mother, I think you are being to hard on yourself. He doesn't share everything with us. We don't need to share everything with him. Father was never included, Heath doesn't need to be, and I think he would understand."

"Really, Jarrod? Should I talk to him?"

"If you are this upset, maybe you should, but sleep on it and then make a decision."

"Jarrod, I have made my decision. I'll explain next year. I would hate to have him upset by something that is already done, and from his withdrawing, I think that he might already realize that his inclusion didn't go to well."

"I think I agree with you. Everyone seemed relieved, even Heath, so I doubt there is anything to worry about."

"Thank you Jarrod. I imagine I will be able to sleep now."

"I'll turn in too. The talk helped me as well. Goodnight Mother."

"Goodnight Jarrod" she said as she closed the door to her room for the last time that night.

As Jarrod and Victoria fell asleep, Heath planned. He had to make this look good. He couldn't just walk out. He wasn't going forever. It just seemed that having him around for the holidays was hard. Leaving for a few days was a small price to pay, for all they did for him. He even had a stocking. Not that he would get to open it, he reminded himself, but he could live with that. If he left early on the twenty forth, and returned on the twenty seventh, that should give them the holiday time they needed.

He just needed a reason to leave that wouldn't make them suspicious. Finally it came to him. They wouldn't question him if he said he received a telegram from Rachael and Hannah, asking for help.

They would let him go, knowing that he had no choice. Jarrod was his only snag. He would have to produce a telegram, just in case Jarrod asked to see it, and knowing Jarrod he would. He'd ask George to send it when he visited them tomorrow. That should work well. Finally settling all his plans, he returned to bed, but found sleep a long time in coming.

After a fitful night, he rejoiced in the dawn. Rising as soon as the sun broke, Heath made his way down the backstairs to the kitchen, to find Silas already awake.

"Isn't this a little early, even for you Silas?" He questioned.

"No sir. Not during the holidays. There is a lot of extra baking to do, and Mrs. Barkley wants to try and re-make the cookies as well, since Mr. Nick is so upset over them being broken. He loves those cookies, and she doesn't want his Christmas to be a disappointment."

"I wouldn't want that either, but then again it might turn out a fine Christmas for them anyway, with or without cookies. I'll just grab some bread, then be on my way."

"Mr. Heath, I've got raisin bread baking for this mornings breakfast."

"Now that is tempting Silas. How long til it's done?"

"Won't be ready for a while yet Mr. Heath."

"Can you save me some? I'll just grab the bread and go now. There's lots of work to do," He said, suiting actions to words, and quickly leaving through the backdoor.

"I'll sure save some Mr. Heath, but Mrs. Barkley doesn't like it when her family isn't together for the meals," Silas muttered under his breath, then returned to his daily chores.

Just as Silas predicted, the rest of the family was not pleased to learn that Heath had already left and wouldn't be joining them at the table, but they weren't really surprised, as Heath consistently rose earlier than all of them.

Nick found Heath by eight thirty, drenched in rain and calf deep in mud and stagnant water near the Turner levee, working hard at restoring it's crumbling length to a state capable of withholding the pressure of the water it needed to contain, as the rain increased.

"Heath, he hollered to be heard over the roar of the water. Receiving no response, he dismounted and moved to join his brother. "How bad is it?"

"Reckon I've seen worse, but it won't hold if the rain keeps up and the Tuolumne overflows, Nick."

"Let me give you a hand then, and I'll get extra men on it after lunch. How do the rest of the trouble spots look?" he asked, knowing that Heath would have already checked.

"Right as rain, he joked, unless there is a flash flood we shouldn't have any trouble with them."

They worked in companionable silence for over two hours before any real progress was noted, but finally it looked as if the men might once again be winning the battle against the forces of nature. As the eroded area was filled and packed, Nick loosened up.

"Heath, we're so far behind that I sometimes wonder if we will ever catch up. I never really told anybody that before, but you seem to understand. As much as I love the holidays, I always worry that I'm not spending the time I need doing what needs to be done. Even for a ranching family, they seem to think, what's a day, or two, or three."

Nodding in sympathy, Heath confirmed that he understood Nick's feelings and added, "I admire how you juggle all the ranch work and the family obligations. Guess I haven't gotten the hang of it yet."

"What's that supposed to mean, you haven't gotten the hang of it yet?" Nick asked, secretly thrilled by the compliment.

Heath muttered something that Nick couldn't make out and started back in on the levee with a vengeance. He worked fast enough for Nick to realize that they were through talking about Heath's feelings for the day, possibly even the week. Finally in exasperation, Nick glared at his brother.

"Heath, you try and play Samson and Goliath all you want, but I'm hungry. Are you going to lunch, or are you going to build this levee into the Great Wall of China?"

Grinning, Heath said, "Let's eat." and the two mounted their horses and slowly made their muddy way home.

Lunch was very lively with everyone talking, and as the noise level grew louder, Heath grew quieter.

He was going to miss this. They were so alive. No matter how many times he reminded himself that he would only be gone three days, it still felt like an eternity. All of a sudden his throat started to feel tight. His heart was pounding so hard he felt it would burst from his chest. His eyes wanted to pop from his head, and his hands grasped his legs, under the table, in a death grip.

But it was the battle that was going on in his mind that kept him anchored to the spot.

Three days Heath, only three days, his rational mind said.

But it's Christmas the cruel voices from his past taunted.

It's only three short days.

Christmas alone.

Three days, no more.

Three days of hell. The sweating increased as the hammering of his heart grew greater.

Stop it. It's only three little days.

Three days alone-alone-alone-his mind taunted.

There was the feeling again. He couldn't keep it at bay any longer, but he still needed to hide it.

I'm surrounded by my family. Affection. Warmth. Comradery.

New family, the feeling cut in.

Ornaments, stocking. Colleen, gifts, talks, walks

There. It passed. The band loosened, he could breathe. In, out, in, out. That wasn't so hard. God, he hadn't had an attack like that since shortly after Carterson, but then the stakes hadn't been so high before either. He could give them space. He couldn't give them up.

For the first time since joining the Barkleys, Heath was the last one from the table. Somehow the act of getting up brought him closer to leaving. Victoria had looked in on him twice, and asked if he needed to talk once. Silas had cleared all but his plate, which was virtually empty. Finally Nick stormed in saying, "First I had a hard time getting you in here, now you won't leave. We have work to do and I need you."

Heath got up. It wasn't as if his stomach could stand another bite, and no matter what he did, time passed, so working would at least keep his mind busy.

"Nick, what are the afternoon plans?"

"Jason just informed me that the stretch of fence near the gully was out. Knocked out by the cattle again. Let's go reinforce it."

Knowing that he needed to keep his mind occupied, and knowing that spending the afternoon with Nick would only increase his thinking about what he was leaving behind, he said "I want to work with the horses. We've got five that need to be broke."

"Fine then, see you at dinner."

"That reminds me, Nick, Mother, I won't be here for dinner."

"Where will you be, dear?" Victoria asked.

"Promised George and Edna I'd spend an evening with them before Christmas. I'm often there Saturday nights so I reckoned it'd be no problem, plus George said his buggy was mired during this last rain storm, and I thought I'd help him get it out. I hate to think of them without easy transportation. They are getting older. Well Nick, let's get to work." and the two left, side by side to finish the day, neither relishing their tasks, due to the ever constant rain.

As Victoria picked up her needlework, she thought. Of course George and Edna were getting older, but did Heath realize that he was the son they never had. While being very pleased that he was a kind, generous person, when he spoke of spending time with them, it hurt, and the emotion, although she was loathe to admit it, was jealously. Jealously seemed to be her cross to bear. While she didn't think that others recognized it as an emotion that often got to her. She wasn't jealous of others property or good fortune, but she did feel that she was jealous. When Nick had been seeing Layal, and spent so much time with her, she missed him. When Audra was involved with Cole Nichols, and spent their embroidery afternoons out on picnics , she missed her. Even Jarrod, and all the time he spent in San Francisco and Stockton caused her to miss him greatly. Now her new son was gone. She missed him. Sitting there thinking made her realize something that she had overlooked before. Maybe it wasn't jealously , but rather loneliness, she feared. Tom's death had left her desolate and lonely. Losing her children to life; husbands and wives, children, jobs, while knowing she would be proud, caused her to admit she was scared. She didn't just want to be someone they visited as need necessitated, but wanted to be fully involved in her children's lives, and that of her grandchildren, while not being a bother, or busy body to any of them.

In light of her depressing thoughts, she realized that all of her children were gone. She packed up her work and ventured outside to watch Heath work with the horses. He would be the only one close enough to the house for her to observe. Audra was at the orphanage, Jarrod rode to town for a brief visit, and Nick was at the gully. Making her way to the corral, she watched the men cheer as Heath worked on breaking a buckskin mustang with black stockings, mane and tail. What a beauty, Victoria thought as she stepped up to the corral fence.

Seeing her, Heath smiled and nodded before refocusing on his ride. It didn't take long for him to be thrown, but he was up just as quickly for another go. A few more identical incidents passed before, at last the mare surrendered to his strong handling.

Heath trotted the mare over to her side. "Mother, he said, grinning, come to see me get coated in mud?"

"I must say that you do seem to be wearing a lot of it this time."

"It's the rain. It the army contract weren't so specific, I'd wait for clear weather and a chance for the ground to dry out, but then again at least falling in the mud is soft.," he chuckled. "I'm finished here. That's the last horse. Will you allow a muddy cowboy to escort you back home?"

"I'd love that," she said, extending her hand, as he effortlessly vaulted the fence.

The two were heading indoors when Jarrod pulled up in the buggy, Audra by his side, and Silver tied behind.

"Jarrod, Audra, how did you two ever end up together?" Victoria questioned.

"Just doing a good deed Mother. " Jarrod said, helping Audra from the buggy.

Audra said, "Yes Mother, Jarrod stopped by the orphanage to help me read to the children. They love hearing a man read to them. It's a welcome change for them, then he brought me home so I wouldn't get wet."

"Yes, I am a knight in shining armor," Jarrod joked.

Heath added, "Well Jarrod, if you don't get out of this rain your armor will tarnish." and laughing they all made their way indoors, and up to their rooms to change.

Nick was just entering for the evening as Heath prepared to leave. Throwing his hat on the table, he announced "If this rain keeps up Heath, we can kiss those orchards goodbye."

"I'm concerned too, Nick. Did you ride by and look at them?"

"The trees are standing in two inches of water. The roots will rot if it doesn't dry out soon. Where are you going, Heath?" he asked noting that Heath was putting on his slicker and hat.

"I told you at lunch. I'm off to George and Edna's tonight."

"Oh Heath, Audra said, not tonight. I was looking forward to beating you at cards again. You seem distracted today. I only win when you're distracted."

"Then it's my good fortune that I'm goin' " he grinned, at her downcast expression. "Night all."

A chorus of goodnights reached his ears as he closed the door behind him. Taking time to spend a few minutes with Charger before saddling Gal, Heath left, excited about seeing George and Edna, but despising the idea of another drenching. The fireplace had looked so cheerful, and the rain so loathsome, he almost stayed.

He was happy he hadn't when he saw George peering through he window while pretending not to be looking for him. Before he could reach the door, Edna had thrown it open and said "Come inside and warm up Heath."

"I'd love to Edna, but if George still wants that wagon out of the mud I'd rather get that done before I get dry and comfortable."

"I see your point" she laughed.

George said, "I'll get my coat. It'll just take me a minute."

Heath had barely exchanged a simple how have you been with Edna, before George was back, looking like he could take on a monsoon. He had on rain boots, two slickers that Heath could see, and a large hat.

"Guess you don't intend on getting wet today, George."

"Rains tiresome. It won't get me though. Come on, let's get moving."

Winking to Edna, who collapsed in giggles, Heath said, "You're right. What are we waiting for?" and headed back outside to Gal.

"No need to ride boy, the wagons not far." George said, stomping off past the barn. When Heath arrived at his side, he was hard pressed not to laugh out loud. The wagon was only ten feet behind the barn. How had George gotten it stuck there? The land on either side was still firm enough to support the wagons weight.

"How did the wagon end up here, George?"

"Well, it was the damndest thing. It'd okay with you if I say damndest isn't it? Edna would kill me so I save them up and use them when I can." Seeing Heath smile, George said, "I knew you wouldn't mind. Anyway, I was backing it out of the barn with the horses and I pulled right on the reins, but the dang horses went right, driving my wagon straight into the mud. What do you say, Heath. Can we get it out tonight?"

"No problem. Why don't you go inside and get dried off while I take care of this. Should only take a few minutes, then I can use your room and not drip all over while you clean up first. Edna hates to have water all over her floors."

Knowing Edna and the potentially resulting words over her having to re-clean a non-necessary mess, had George agreeing hastily. Heath returned to Gal and brought her around to the side of the barn, chucking as he explained the situation to her. "The Gal, he pulled right, and was surprised that the wagon went right. I really wonder how they survived all these years out here. Anyway, the long and short of it is, we gotta get his wagon out of the mud. You know girl, I'm sick of mud!"

Once again using his rope and Gals pommel, he secured the free end to the wagon, and then with a very repulsed look at the mud, waded his way in and stepped behind the front wheel. Bracing his legs and maneuvering his shoulder behind the front wheel, he grasped the side of the wagon firmly and said, "Now, Gal. Pull!", and began heaving at the same time. As Gal strained, Heath increased the pressure as he heard the first sucking sounds, that signaled the imminent release of, at least, the front end. As it came clear, he moved back a few steps to help speed up the back ends removal as Gal increased her pulling as the resistance lessened. Finally, with a loud, wet, sucking sound, the wagon pulled free. They kept it moving and in a few seconds it was again resting on the harder packed earth. Pleased that it hadn't taken longer than he expected, he decided to let the rain clean the caked on mud.

"Good girl, Gal." he said gently, as he walked her back to the tree covered area near the front door. "This should help keep you dry. I promise you a good rub down tonight. You've earned it." he told her as he once again moved to enter their home. Taking a quick look downward, he decided that retracing his steps would be a better idea as he moved to their pump. He thoroughly drenched his legs, from the knees down, rinsing off what would have dried to be layers of mud. At least he was only wet, not wet and muddy. Again he moved to the house, but as he neared he thought about their presents in the barn. No Heath, go in and get warm, and have some dinner, he lectured himself. A quick dash to the barn later will be fine. As he drew near a beckoning light welcomed him inside and he was touched that George had opened the door and was watching his approach.

"Well?" he said roughly.

"She's out George. I'm letting the rain wash the mud off. I'll take her into the barn before I head home."

"Thanks."

"Don't mention it, just let me at Edna's cooking," he called, loud enough for her to hear him.

"It's ready Heath," she said, her voice getting louder as she neared the door. Taking one look at him, she shook her head and said,"Take off those boots young man. Wet pants are one thing, but wet boots on my floor, are another. Now I've got......."

"Uh, Ma'am if....."

"Heath!" she scolded, "I told you months ago if you ma'amed me again I'd let you go hungry, so you better try again and call me Edna. You're not upset are you?"

No ma'a....uh.Edna, I'm not upset, he grinned, it's just that if I take off my boots, I'll like to never get 'em on again."

"Fine, fine, leave them on, but don't put your feet up on the table."

Rolling his eyes as he entered, she lightly punched his arm and said, "I saw that young man. Now let's eat. As I was saying, I made you roast potatoes, baked chicken, those little carrots that you like, and bread. Think that will fill you up?"

"Yes Ma'a........Edna, and I'm right looking forward to it."

George and Heath seated themselves at her table and she served all of them a generous portion of the meal. George was telling Heath about some hunting he wanted to do , so Edna decided to let her mind wander. Heath was smiling. Heath's tone sounded light and happy, but he was troubled. He hadn't used Ma'am in months, and she hadn't heard him slip back into his childhood language patterns in months either. When he told her of his childhood was really the only time she ever heard him speak in what she liked to call, his back woods talk, but here it was again. Thinking as hard as possible, she could not come up with a reason for his being uncomfortable, that was out of the ordinary, but she did reason out two things.

They didn't see as much of him as they used to, which meant that they treasured his visits all the more, and that she wasn't really much good at thinking through peoples problems. She preferred to take life as it came, one joyous moment to the next. Her round face etched into a happy smile, she decided that no matter what Victoria said about letting Heath find a girl on his own, he needed a wife. That was it. A wife would make him happy.

"What George?" Edna said, looking confused. "Were you talking to me?"

The two men traded amused glances as George replied, "I asked if we were going to get dessert, or if we had to wait until you finished. Doesn't look like your hungry."

"Guess I'm not, but give me a minute and I'll get the fruitcake."

"Let me help you clear the table." Heath said, as he stacked the dishes and took them to the sideboard.

"No need to help Heath, I can get it," Edna began.

"No problem, I can at least help a bit. I haven't seen enough of you lately. This gives me a few extra minutes." he said, smiling at her.

"Well then, why don't you carry out the cutting knife and plates, and I'll bring the cake," she said, as she handed him the items.

Heath set the table, and took the time that Edna was in the kitchen to say, "George, I have another favor to ask of you. Can we talk later, without Edna hearing?"

"How about now?" " Edna" he called, "Heath and I are going to have a drink out on the porch. We will be in for fruitcake in a minute." George poured two whiskeys and opened the door, as Heath moved to follow him outside. Never one to beat around the bush, George said, "Now what is it you need, boy?"

"Would you mind riding to Modesto and sending a telegram for me on the twenty second. I have it written out for you," Heath said pressing the note and a few coins in George's hand, to cover the cost.

"Let me take look at it," he said, as he unfolded the note. Reading he saw:

To: Heath Barkley

Stockton-Barkley ranch

Rachael is sick. Please come.

Hannah

"I don't understand Heath," George said, as he looked at Heath's trembling hands.

"I'm not asking you to understand, just to do me the favor. And don't tell Edna." Heath responded, very quietly.

"I'm not sure that I like it, but I'm not sure why. I'll do it for you though. I owe you that much."

A huge grin of relief appeared on Heath's face and George was certain that something was going on. He just wasn't sure that he wanted to know what. Deciding to just do as he was asked, he said "Heath, shall we go in and have that fruitcake?"

"Sure sounds good to me." Heath responded, in a contented tone, and George was glad to see that he had eased Heath's mind.

"Edna, were coming in. Hope that cake is ready." George called, to allow Edna time to get away from the door. Heath may not be aware of it, but his wife was a snoop. He was sure she had heard everything, including Heath's, "don't tell Edna," and he also knew he would have to tell her tonight, but Heath didn't need to know. Why should he have his night ruined.

When the were again seated at the table, Edna cut the homemade fruitcake, and they all ate large pieces as they talked about the weather, and the upcoming holiday. Edna and George told Heath all about their Christmases, including the one they spent huddled together in an old abandoned barn. According to Edna, if George had known that the area was prone to flash floods they would have been home, safe and warm, but instead they got caught out in a storm their first year here. They had to make a quick run to higher ground, and were pleased to even find an abandoned barn. To hear her tell it, they didn't dry out until the New Year.

Heath figured that if anyone would get stuck outdoors in a flood it would be George. As he listened to them he felt warmed by them sharing their memories, and decided it was time for him to give them their gifts. "George, Edna, I think that I will go bring the wagon in for the night. I need to work off some of this food. It was so wonderful that I ate too much. I'll be back in a minute."

"Want company?" George questioned.

"No, if you don't mind, I'd like to take care of this myself." Heath said.

George, seeing the scheming look in Heath's eye, relented gracefully. "Hurry back in, when we were out earlier it didn't look like the rain was letting up any."

"I'll make it as fast as possible. I really don't relish another drenching." Heath said ,opening the door, and moving into the night. He hurriedly pulled the wagon, on squeaky wheels, into the shelter of the barn. After listening to it, he knew that he couldn't leave it for George in this state. He quickly gathered some sand paper and oil, then went to work removing the rust and oiling the joints. The more he worked, the more he realized that the entire wagon needed to be refinished. He added that to his list of chores for the near future, then quickly grabbed his gifts for them and concealing them behind his back, he headed back inside.

They heard the door open, and expected to hear it close, but when they didn't, both turned and looked to find Heath standing in the doorway wearing a look of anticipation.

"Heath, come in here. I made coffee." Edna said going to get the coffee, while wondering what he was playing at.

"Uh, could you both just stay in here?" he asked. "I have a little something for you, uh...for Christmas."

"Heath, you shouldn't have," they both echoed, as their faces took on the same look as Heath's, one of eager anticipation.

"Uh, I'm not really sure how to do this, and I didn't wrap them.." he said, as he moved behind the couch and put them both down so they were hidden from view. "Edna, this is for you" he said, head down, face turning red, as he handed her a cherry spice cabinet.

Taking it from his outstretched hands, she marveled over the work that obviously went into the piece. She would treasure it always, since he made it, but it was also a piece of beauty that would be very attractive in her kitchen, and help contain the bottles she was always complaining about. It was rectangular in shape with hinged doors that closed in the middle. He had carved the front to make it look like there were three panels and had secured knobs in the middle of each of the squares. A top was extended over the cabinet and rounded to soften its look. He had carved a beautiful tree branch with a robin sitting on it, as a decoration. When she opened the two doors, she noted that the inside was partitioned into three shelves, corresponding perfectly with the outside carving. Each shelf looked like it was the exact size needed to house her riot of spice bottles.

In amazement, she said, "Heath I have a million questions. Okay, just a few actually. Where do I begin? Let's see, first, how did you make this when I wasn't looking? As you know, I snooped, and I never found this. Second, how did you get the sizes right? Third, how did you know that this was what I needed more than anything? Fourth, how did you know that a robin is my favorite bird? Fifth, where did you learn to carve so well? Given a few minutes I am sure I will have more questions."

Raising his hands in surrender at the onslaught of questions hurled his way, he laughed and tried to reply. " Edna, I know that the robin is your favorite because you told me about the one that sat outside your window when you were a little girl. I measured the spice bottles one night when I came for dinner and offered to go get the coffee. I knew you needed it because you tell me every time we clear up, that you have no room thanks to the little bottles cluttering everything up. And for the question that you really want answered, I hadn't started your gift when I caught you snooping, so I dug a hole in the barn, and basically made a trap door. I kept your gift in there, and slid Jarrod's on top before I left each time. You never found my hiding spot."

"Are you gloating, Heath?"

"Yes, I think I am," he said, once again allowing laughter to overtake him. She looked so put out at having been tricked.

"Now George, I have one for you," Heath said, handing over a sturdy looking hand held tool box.

"Unable to say anything at all, George just held it tight and looked at Heath. Finally with Edna's prodding, he said, "I never had anything like this before."

Heath knew that the statement was accurate, and smiled but managed to stop the snicker that wanted to escape his lips. The number of times he had prayed that George would have something as useful as a tool box was innumerable. "It should make things easier he said, flashing a quick smile at Edna. Heath had told her about George's gift, to keep her from thinking about what he was making her.

"Think we could have that game of cards now," he asked, as the silence lengthened.

"No, I don't Heath," Edna said. " I need to cover the fruitcake first, then we can play. You can talk to George while you wait."

Heath took his customary seat, still overcome by emotion. Colleen, and George and Edna were his first real attempts at gift giving, and they all seemed to be happy with their presents. He had done just fine, and hoped that the family would like theirs as much. He intended to give everybody his presents when he returned from his stay at the line shack.

George, on the other side of the room was as overwhelmed as Heath was. Edna and he exchanged gifts, but he never thought that he would receive a gift from Heath. He shouldn't have been surprised, he reasoned, as Heath was a very considerate boy. He didn't need to come over and help them, and he didn't need to stop by just to talk once in awhile. But getting a gift, was like having a son, who cared about him and thought about him enough to really take his own time to show he cared. While Heath was working on his gift, he had to have been thinking about him, and using his time, just for him. He felt as special as the night Edna agreed to marry him. Heath was the second best thing in his life, and he loved him.

"Uh...Heath?"

"Yes."

"Thanks again," he said sticking out his hand and shaking Heath's. He was surprised when Heath pulled him to his feet and gave him a very, very brief one armed hug. He sat back down, thrilled that now, both he and Edna had received hugs from this man they thought of as their son. He was also amused to see that Heath's face was beet red and pointed directly at the floor. This boy, had as hard a time showing emotion as he himself did. What would they do, when Edna returned with their gift, to him.

It only took a second for him to answer the question as Edna re-entered the room at that moment, saying, "Heath, we would like you to open this. It's our Christmas gift to you. I would have liked to give it to you on Christmas, but as you will be at home, I think tonight will be as good as any. I was thinking that if you took it over to............"

"For God's sake Edna, let him open it." George said, winking at Heath.

Heath took the parcel and held it on his lap, just marveling that he was holding a gift that was to be his. It was about 2 feet square and maybe eight inches high. Looking up and seeing them nod he removed the string that held the lid closed and lifted off the top. His eyes grew wide as his hand reached in and felt the knitted sweater, that he knew Edna had made him. Pulling it from the box, he was startled when another object fell out and landed at his feet on the floor. Bending to pick it up, he grasped a deep walnut, heavy, wooden, pocket knife. Looking up questioningly, he glanced first at Edna, then at George.

George, realizing that Heath couldn't ask what he wanted to know, supplied his own answers to the unspoken questions.

"Heath, the knife is mine. It's a good whittling knife. You may have guessed that my talents don't really lie with woodworking, and I think we can safely say that you are handy with knives and tools."

"George tell him...."

"I am if you will be quiet."

"Heath, the knife has a history. It belonged to my grandfather. His name was George, and it was his thirteenth birthday gift. It was the best knife that could be bought in this country at that time. He used it, which you can tell, as the blade has been sharpened a lot. He passed it to my father, who is also a George, for his thirteenth birthday. My father, a shop keeper in Bangor, couldn't do anything with wood, and I seem to have inherited his talent along with the knife. Nothing would make me happier than having you carry it and use it as my grandfather did. A knife should be used. I don't have a son to hand it on to, so I hope you will accept it. It would make me proud to know that you were using a knife that belonged to me."

Blinking his eyes he laid the knife on the sofa beside him and once again picked up the sweater. Pulling it over his head, he remarked that it was a perfect fit. It was a cream colored hand worked cable knit that would keep him very warm for years to come.

"George, Edna, I don't know how to thank you enough. You've both done so much for me..."he trailed off. "I........" he tried again.

"We understand, Heath," Edna smiled, thrilled by his reaction. "Can I have a hug?"

"I can do that." he smiled, rising and locking her in his hard embrace.

Playfully swatting his back she said," Okay Heath, let me go. You'll make me blush as much as you are." she teased.

As he released her he shook George's hand, while trying to keep the lump in his throat from growing any larger. "How about that card game now?" he suggested, desperate to divert attention from his inability to adequately express himself.

"Great idea," George added, feeling the same.

The three of them sat for the next hour and played poker. It was a real treat. Edna had never played before and was thrilled to learn. She kept commenting how it made her feel like she knew a secret that was usually reserved for males only. When the game broke up, Heath, despite trying to lose, was ahead by thirty five matches. Edna laughingly insisted that he keep his spoils, as George once again rolled his eyes at her perpetually lighthearted manner.

Pocketing the prized knife, and still wearing the sweater she knit for him, Heath bid them a happy Christmas and an affectionate goodnight, before he closed the door behind him. Mounting Gal, he turned once more and saw that the door was open and they were watching him ride off. It was a comforting feeling, and he was even more pleased to hear them say "Thank you, Heath. We'll see you soon."

Returning to his home, he once again, thanked God for George and Edna. They had both helped him when he needed it, although in different ways, making his first few months easier to bear. They were still giving, and the presents he took home proved it. To date, they were the first actual presents he had ever received, and he was grateful that he was with them, and not the Barkleys when he opened his first real gift. He would have been mortified to have dropped the knife on the floor, in front of his family. He assumed they would have known that another present might have been in the box, and he could see each of them, masterfully sliding their hand around to check, before removing whatever the item was. There was another lesson learned. This year was full of lessons, and he was enjoying them, despite the discomfort.

Edna was pestering George the entire time Heath was riding home to tell her what was in the note Heath handed him. Knowing that she would eventually work it out of him, he gave in and told her that Heath wanted him to send a telegram. When she asked what it said, he tried to be evasive, but again, she was to persistent for him and he let her read the entire thing. He was glad that he had given in, when she snuggled up to him in bed that night, and spoke of Heath. He was often in their thoughts at night, but they were rarely spoken out loud. Tonight they talked of his talents, the wonderful gifts he had made them, and their joy at his happiness.

Heath was unaware of their thoughts as he stabled Gal and gave her the brushing he promised. Then after checking on Charger, he crept into the house and upstairs to his room, where he removed the sweater and set the knife on his dresser. What a fine night, he thought as he climbed into bed and fell asleep.

As always, on the days he had breakfast with the family, rather than leaving earlier, Heath was struck with how early the whirlwind of activity began. Already he could hear Silas preparing the table, and he cursed inwardly, knowing that the raisin bread, while it would be there today, had been fresh the day before. Audra could be heard descending the stairs, and speaking to their Mother about a dance she had been invited to. Nick was pacing, he smiled. He truly had no way of knowing this for sure, but it fit. The meal wasn't served, as they all weren't assembled, and with the ladies talking, Nick would be left to cool his heels. Nick sure hated that, he thought as the half smile turned into a grin.

Shrugging into his shirt, he picked up the pocketknife and slipped it into his pants pocket, replacing his worn knife. He headed for the door then turned around and decided he would wear his new sweater as well.

He was headed for the stairs, when he heard Jarrod's door open behind him.

"Wait, Heath," he heard Jarrod call, and stopped, as his brother caught up.

"Do you have a busy day today Jarrod?"

"Not to rough. I thought I would finish up that proposal to the land commission, then just take it easy." he smiled, as he watched Heath think of a comeback.

"Why don't you go over the books, with all that spare time you have brother, or perhaps help Audra in one of her charitable deeds." came the quick rejoinder.

"Actually, I am going to do the household accounts today Heath. That should keep me busy, and dry, the entire afternoon."

"Now just how did you say one went about getting a job like yours?" Heath remarked, slapping him on the back in a friendly manner.

"First there are the years of education, then....."

"Now I remember why I like rain," Heath teased, as they joined the others for breakfast.

Taking his place at the head of the table, Jarrod was surprised to hear Audra say, "Heath, I don't think I have seen that sweater before. Is it new. You look really nice in it. I bet some of my friends........"

As she continued to prattle, Victoria, along with the rest of the family looked at Heath and remarked on the sweater as well.

"Now when did you go and get that Heath?" Nick questioned. "It's not fair that you got some time in town, and I didn't." he grumped, all of a sudden realizing that he had shopping to do.

Looking slightly embarrassed at the attention, but desperately wanting to show off his gift, Heath said "Isn't it nice. I got it from Edna last night. They gave it to me for Christmas. What do you think?"

Victoria thought it was charming, how, with each word he uttered, he sounded more and more like a happy schoolboy. "I bet she made that herself. The cable stitching is superb. Did you know, that up until two years ago she won the county fair each and every year for her knitting. You should be very honored." she said, trying to add to his pleasure.

"Well you can't wear it out to work today," Nick remarked. "It will get ruined by the rain. Save it for the next dance we have in town."

"Oh yes, I was thinking the same thing. I know my friends will find it attractive on you," Audra said, slyly.

Audra's comment caused Victoria to smile, as she realized this was probably Edna's plan. She didn't think Edna agreed that Heath's dating habits should be left alone, and was probably lining up girls to throw at him, as he sat here, in the new sweater. The color was handsome on him. He really was a very good looking young man. Colleen would have her hands full when the rest of the ladies realized that she had been snared by Heath. It would raise his credibility as a man to be fought over and they would probably vie for him until the date was set, and Victoria had no doubt that the date would be set.

That raised a second question. What were Heath's Christmas plans for Colleen. She doubted that he would have none. Since he was the only child of hers that was currently involved in a serious relationship, she couldn't really have a party and invite all their companions. Also this was even more complicated, as she still didn't think Heath had told anyone about the two of them. She vowed to get him to herself, and question him before the week was up.

Her thoughts were interrupted by Audra, asking if she would go with her to make some deliveries.

"I think that would be a wonderful diversion today," Victoria answered her daughter. "I can be ready in half an hour. Will that suit you?"

"Perfectly Mother, and thank you. I really didn't want to go alone. The weather is to dismal to be out in by myself."

"Well Heath and I have to get moving, as soon as we get done with breakfast," Nick remarked. "We talked about it last night and think there is a way to drain the orchards, but, it will keep us out all day, so don't expect us for lunch either."

"Shall I have Silas pack sandwiches for your saddlebags?" Victoria asked.

"Don't relish soggy bread, and doubt we'll have time to eat anyway, do you Nick?" Heath said, munching his way through a big slice of raisin bread.

"No I don't," Nick replied through a mouthful of eggs. "We'll just have to make breakfast last," and he helped himself to another huge helping of steak and eggs, as the rest of the family looked on in awe.

"If you will excuse me, I'll just go get ready, Audra." Victoria said, making her way from the table to the stairs.

"We should head out too, Nick"

"Coming, just let me finish this steak," Nick replied taking a last bite before also rising and heading for the door.

Grimacing, both brothers looked at the blanket of rain, and the endless gray skies.

"Why even bother with the slickers?" Nick fumed, as Heath passed his over. "We'll be wet before we reach the barn."

"Let's go then," Heath said, ducking his head against the onslaught, and making his way into the rain, as Jarrod laughed and said, "I don't envy you your task, Nick."

"Me either," he threw back, as he moved after Heath, his prediction correct. He was drenched before he was even halfway to the barn.

Both men, wanting nothing more than to stay inside, worked furiously. Along with three ranch hands, they dug furrows that led to a lower patch of ground, in an attempt to create enough drainage to stop the tree roots from rotting. Hoping to make as much progress as possible before the day ended, they didn't stop for lunch, and were thoroughly exhausted, drenched, and irritable by late afternoon. It didn't help that while it looked like the almond grove would make it, the ground around the peaches had turned spongy, not just muddy. They were probably too late, but still they had pushed, feeling irritated at working for what was probably an expensive losing battle.

Victoria and Audra, faced the rain with trepidation as well, but made their way to the buggy Ciego had brought around, and headed to town.

"What errands do you need to run Audra?"

"I'm picking up some material that came in at the mercantile. Then I am stopping by Helen's to drop off the stockings. She is taking them to Father Fernando tomorrow, so he will be prepared by Christmas morning. The next stop is Colleen's to pick up the sheet music I need for Christmas eve mass. Last I need to stop briefly by the livery. They have the most adorable stray dog, and I thought we could keep it," she said hesitantly, knowing that once her Mother saw him, she wouldn't refuse.

"Audra, another stray?"

"Just wait until you see him to make up your mind. Please?"

Smiling Victoria said, "Of course we'll take the dog, Audra" and was rewarded with a smile in return, and a "Thank you Mother. I'm really glad you came with me."

Pulling up to the mercantile, Victoria looped the reins over the hitching post and the ladies made their way inside.

"Audra! Good morning. Mrs. Barkley, I wasn't expecting you." Thelma said. "Did you come to pick up...."

"Yes, yes I did. The material that came in," Audra said, just a little bit to quickly.

Victoria was sure she was getting a Christmas gift or two as well. Deciding to give her daughter the time she needed, Victoria walked to the books that were on display, and spying one she thought Jarrod would like, she purchased it, after Audra had concluded her business, and had her parcels wrapped.

Thanking Thelma, and stowing their packages in the buggy, they went to Helen's, dropped off the stockings, and after a fifteen minute chat with the woman Jarrod showed more than a passing interest in, they made their way to Colleen's house. Audra was surprised when her mother announced that she would not be going inside with her, preferring to stay in the buggy. Finally, but not without a little bit of cajoling, Audra agreed and went to the door alone. Mrs. Mary McDougal answered the door, and spying Victoria, ushered Audra inside, then hastily donned her cape, rushed to the buggy, and insisted Victoria come in for a quick cup of tea, while the girls chatted. Knowing that she had no choice but to agree, unless she wanted to appear downright rude, Victoria capitulated, and sullenly entered, ahead of Mary. Taking a seat in the parlor, she graciously commented that the house looked lovely, as Mary brought out the tea. Victoria, then, hearing the girls giggling in the back room, steeled herself for a long tedious visit.

Mary McDougal chatted happily to Victoria as she sat, not picking up on her quietness as a sign of irritation. Finally as Victoria added as little to the conversation as possible, Mary asked, "Victoria, you are quiet today. Is anything amiss?"

"No Mary. Just tired of rain."

"Isn't that the truth. I was telling Heath, just yesterday, that I wasn't sure the rain would ever quit."

Bewildered, Victoria said, "Heath was here?"

"Oh my yes. He came to give Colleen her Christmas present. I must say he is a pleasant young man." she gushed, acting like she and Heath were close friends.

Trying to make sense of what she was hearing, Victoria said firmly, "You made it clear at the harvest festival that he wasn't someone you would like Colleen to see."

"That was before I realized he was such a pleasant young man," she said, trying to hide her disgust at the way he had just barged into their home, leaving her with no choice but to be polite, or lose her daughter. "My daughter seems very taken with him."

"They make a nice couple," Victoria answered, thawing slightly and virtually desperate to question Heath closely, but, within two minutes the need to question Heath was no longer there, as Mary continued, "I must say I was quite surprised that Colleen would go against my wishes. I had no idea until yesterday that Colleen and Heath were seeing each other. Children. I was so angry with Colleen, going behind my back, and seeing Heath. Well you understand how I felt, my Colleen with Heath, but Colleen is very strong willed and she seems to really enjoy Heath's company, so I decided to give him a chance, and he acquitted himself quite well." she added primly.

"Realizing that Mary was not being completely honest, Victoria pressed for more information and Mary said in a quiet but conspiratol whisper, "Whether he is exactly what I would hope for Victoria, he makes my daughter happy, and as a mother, you know, that is what is important. Colleen is happier than I have seen her in years."

"But your still not pleased?" she pressed further, unwilling to relent, such was her anger over Mary's previous treatment of her son.

Realizing that she, somewhere along the line, offended Victoria about her son's parentage, she decided to be completely honest. "Victoria, No matter what I've said or done in the past, I will do anything not to lose my daughter. If she likes Heath, then Heath must be a wonderful man and that is going to have to be good enough for me."

"He is wonderful." Victoria declared, and not just because Colleen likes him. Thawing slightly at Mary's honesty, if not particularly liking her reasoning, Victoria then changed the subject a bit by asking, "Heath has been a little closed mouth. What did he give Colleen, if you don't mind my asking?"

"Not at all Victoria, let me show you." she said leading Victoria to their tree, where her eyes were drawn to a lovely wooden ornament.

"You have good taste, Victoria. That is Heath's gift to Colleen. Magnificent isn't it?" she added as Victoria allowed the delicate ornament to turn in her fingers.

"I had no idea." she muttered to herself, entranced that her quiet, often sullen son, could hide a gift and a talent, but she knew at once he had made it. It was one of a kind and obviously made from love. A she continued to contemplate the ornament, noting the angels likeness to Colleen, the two girls returned and she let it drop from her fingers, and nestle back in its spot in the trees branches.

"Goodbye Audra, Mrs. Barkley," Colleen said, as Mary opened the door and handed them their wraps

"Goodbye," Audra called, holding her sheet music and stepping outside.

Victoria, glancing one more time at the tree, started as Colleen drew near and whispered, "Its lovely isn't it? I'm glad you had a chance to see it. I've wanted to share it with you. Have a safe trip," she added in a louder tone, as Victoria joined Audra in the buggy and headed for the livery.

"Mr. Carlson," Audra called, dashing inside, "Where is he?"

"He's over hear Audra. Have you picked out a name?" Mr. Carlson asked.

Scooping the small dog up, Audra announced, "I was thinking Puddles, since were having so much rain. Isn't he adorable, Mother?"

Reveling in the excitement in her daughter's tone, Victoria replied, "Adorable Audra. Let's get him home. Good day Mr. Carlson. I hope the rain isn't upsetting business any."

"Not much Mrs. Barkley. Just less travelers, so there is less work. But the Mrs. Thinks this is a good thing and I find myself agreeing with her. You two have a good day." he said, returning to his work, but looking back over his shoulder, as Audra kept the puppy warm all the way to the buggy. Yes, that pup would have a good home. Audra had such a kind heart. It wouldn't be much longer before she made some lucky man very happy, Mr. Carlson mused.

By dinner the men had cleaned up and regained some semblance of polite behavior while Audra and Victoria told them all about the morning. When Silas announced dinner, Victoria again, selected Heath as her escort, leaving a puzzled Jarrod to follow in her wake. On the way in Victoria quietly told Heath, "Colleen has a very lovely hand carved ornament and I hear you are the man she is thanking for it."

As the crimson stained his face, he replied, "Reckon so, how did you find out?"

"Surprisingly Heath, after having a talk with Mary, she pointed it out to me. I am pleased she is coming around. She is a hard woman to avoid, and that was my intention, as long as she was opposed to you."

As the red once again crept up his face, he said, "You would have done that for me?"

"Do you really need to ask, Heath?" came her quick reply, followed by, "You are adorable when you blush."

At these words, even his ears darkened, and she laughed playfully, as he seated her. The rest of the family commented on his reddened appearance, wanting to know what words were exchanged, but Victoria kept them at bay, and eventually the talk turned to other matters, but Heath remained flushed throughout the dinner, and it grew more pronounced as his mother periodically took the time to wink at him, when no one was watching.

Heath didn't believe he would welcome another trip into the rain, but decided he really needed some fresh air to cool of. Over dessert Heath said, "Despite the weather, I'm going for a ride after dinner. Anyone want to come along?"

Four shocked faces turned to him in amazement.

Finally Nick broke the silence with, "You're saying you want company?"

"Is that so odd?"

"Yes!" all four responded at once.

Flushing again, and ritualistically raising and lowering his fork, with a plink, Heath admitted, "Yep. I guess it is. Reckon I'll need to change that some. I uh...enjoy your company. Should probably make a point of spending more time with you."

Victoria and Jarrod both understood what the admission had cost him, opening up a small part of himself to possible hurt and rejection. As Victoria sat, as pleased as could be, Jarrod, unable to contain his enthusiasm, stood and said, "I haven't had enough rain, being cooped up inside. I would be glad to join you. Let's ride."

"Do you think he could finish his fruit first?" Audra laughed, thrilled to see that Heath was asking for company and that she wasn't being excluded. "If you're up to it Heath, I'd love to show you Puddles."

"Puddles!" Nick said, incredulously. "Have you lost what little mind you possess? All Heath and I do, day in and day out, is contend with puddles."

Seeing their bewilderment, Audra realized that she hadn't told them that they had a new puppy. "I guess I forgot to tell you that we have a new member in the family. His name is Puddles, and he was a stray that the livery owner found. We brought him home today."

"I'd love to see your dog." Heath said. "I'll meet you after the ride."

"Why don't you show us all now, Audra." Nick remarked.

Although she wanted to spend some time alone with Heath, she realized that Nick once again needed to be included, so she answered, "That sounds like a great idea. Let's go now. The puppy is so sweet. A black and white mix. I thought I'd make him a bow for Christmas."

"He sounds lovely," Jarrod said, more to still her chatter, than anything else.

"Puddles!" Audra called. "Come out Puddles. See, there he is. Isn't he adorable?"

Stooping and letting the little dog lick his hand, Jarrod said, "Audra, If I were a stray, I would hope you found me."

"I think I would agree with that comment." Nick concurred.

"As the resident stray, Heath laughed, removing any sting they might have felt at his words, I know I am happy to be here."

"I'm sure I speak for each of us Heath, when I say we wish you could have been with us sooner. Since Nick has hold of the pup, why don't we saddle up and ride?"

"Sounds great. You got Jingo, or would you like me to saddle him for you?"

"I can manage. I don't think I've gotten that soft." Jarrod chuckled. Winking at Nick, who noticed and put puddles on the ground. Jarrod said, "Want to race, Heath? I bet I can saddle Jingo, before you finish with Gal."

"Sound like a sure winner for me, Jarrod. You're on." and Heath reached for his saddle only to find that Nick had beaten him to it and was preventing him from getting his hands on it.

"Come on Jarrod," Nick encouraged, as Audra screamed, "You used to do this to me all the time. Heath, it's not fair. They are a team. You don't stand a chance."

"Oh don't I," he replied, easily springing to Jingo's back as Jarrod was swinging the saddle on. "You're on my team, Audra. Tickle Nick!." With that he headed Jingo masterfully past Jarrod's body and out the stall, heading for the barn door.

Nick, trapped holding the saddle in his hands, was left at Audra's mercy, and she gleefully went along with Heath's plan. "This is revenge for years of torment Nick," she said, as he collapsed in a fit of laughter, dropping the saddle as she continued her relentless pursuit of his rib cage and underarms.

"No fair," he gasped, as Jarrod looked on and laughed, refusing to go to his aid. It didn't take long for Nick to turn the tables, and turn Audra into a limp pool of laughter.

As they struggled, and Victoria and Jarrod laughed, Heath ran in and grabbed the saddle, and led Gal quickly outside. While the family continued to laugh, he saddled Gal, and perched atop her back, led Jingo back to Jarrod saying, "Just what do I win, Jarrod?"

His calmly uttered words, on a carefully schooled poker face, stopped the laughter in its tracks, and seeing him atop Gal, Audra jumped up and said, "We win. I won. Jarrod, Nick, I love having another brother. Helps even the odds."

"That was a sneaky trick. I'll have to remember it. There will be payback you know," Nick said rising, and catching his breath.

Imperiously dipping his head, as if to say, go ahead and try, Heath smiled smugly. "Jarrod, while you saddle Jingo I'll take my partner to the house on Gal, so she can stay a little drier. Would you like a lift as well Mother?"

"I'll walk the losers in" she said, thrilled by the family harmony. Christmas would be great if this continued.

Heath too, was thrilled as he rode with Audra to the main house. Knowing he only had five days left before his short break, as he was thinking of it, he was truly allowing himself to relax and enjoy every minute he could with the family. He didn't analyze anything. He was just living in the moment, capturing more memories of a warm family life. He was sharing himself, which was hard, but he was learning that sharing was a necessary part of becoming a family member. Setting Audra by the door, he waited as Jarrod drew up and dropped off Victoria. Both riders laughed, when from their higher vantage point they could see Nick trudging through puddled rain water, his voice clearly audible over the storm's fury.

"First another stray, not that it isn't cute, then I lose a bet to my younger siblings, and now I have to dry off again. Damn this rain."

"Nick!" Victoria said sharply, "I realize that we are all fed up with the weather. I don't remember a storm like this in ten years, but mind your language. Now come inside and let's get you warm and dry. How about we share a hot chocolate, and laugh at those two when we come back drenched."

"Now there is an idea. Let's go Mother, Sis", and they headed and they headed inside, as Heath and Jarrod took off.

"Just where are we headed?" Jarrod called over a gust of wind.

"Place I found. Follow me."

Jarrod stayed close by Heath's side and allowed Heath to lead the way, over what seemed to be, unfamiliar terrain, in the darkness. It seemed like they rode for at least an hour, before Jarrod noticed Heath slow his horse to a walk. Heath motioned Jarrod to dismount, and he obeyed without talking, not wanting to break the companionable mood that seemed to descend on him as they rode. Taking Jingo's reins in his hand, he led the horse to a few scrub pines and tied him down, as Heath was. He then followed Heath up a path, made slippery by mud. He tripped a few times, and was grateful each time for Heath's steadying arm. It didn't take him long to realize that this place was probably well frequented by Heath for solitude. It took about five minutes of climbing along the path in the darkness of the starless night, broken only by a few flashes of lightning, that gave him an eerie glimpse of gnarled pines and high rock ledges, before he realized Heath had stopped. His feeling of apprehension abated abruptly, as Heath helped him enter a narrow opening in the cliff. Still unable to see, it took him a minute to discern why he felt more comfortable. He wasn't being rained on. "Heath?" he said, suddenly feeling the oppressive stillness.

"Just a minute," came Heath's calm response.

As he lowered himself to the ground, he heard, what he presumed was Heath, returning to his side.

"I see you made yourself comfortable, Jarrod."

"You're guessing," he replied, relieved not to be left alone in the blackness, "you can't see anything."

"Can in a minute, I think you'll be surprised."

Jarrod was, as he saw a lantern flame to life and Heath's features appear in the glow. Allowing his eyes to adjust to the light, Jarrod finally took a look around, and was amazed. Again he questioned "Heath?", but this time he wasn't looking for comfort but rather answers.

"It is incredible, isn't it Jarrod? I came here quite by accident chasing a rabbit that was giving me a run for my money."

"Heath, could you perhaps start at the beginning?"

"Do you really want to hear my story, or just see the place?"

Jarrod hated the inference that a location, even one as unique as this, would make Heath think his story wouldn't be interesting, and he hastened to assure him. "I would rather listen to one of your stories, than see this place at all. I feel privileged that you are sharing it with me. I do have questions, but your story first please, and in detail. You don't talk that often."

"Well if you're sure, Heath mumbled looking at the ground, it's not the nicest story on earth to tell you about."

An exasperated, "Please!" was heard in the stillness.

"Fine Jarrod, but if it gets to much, or to late, stop me. Promise."

"I promise."

"I had been summoned home from working a spread up north of Bloods, because my mama was dying. Within two days I arrived home, realized Hannah was in a world of her own making, Rachael looked older than I remembered as the weight of her life pressed in on her, learned that Tom Barkley was my father, and buried my mama." Lost in thought, the words tumbled out one after another, of this story he needed to tell. "I'd sent her money every month, never needed much myself, but even that wasn't enough to provide good food and proper medicine. It probably wouldn't have mattered anyway, as the town doctor refused to treat her. She had so little, Jarrod, and she didn't even have me those last weeks, that's how long the telegram took to reach me. Found out it wasn't sent as the money wasn't available, until they got my next installment. By then it was almost to late."

Shaking himself out of his trance, he hurriedly added, "I buried her. Dug the ground myself outside of town, near her favorite spot to talk. We'd talk there every birthday and holiday. It was kinda sacred, if you know what I mean. They wouldn't take her in the cemetery. You think that she is okay outside a cemetery? I wonder sometimes. Anyway, You want to hear about this place. I was angry, but you knew that when I arrived. Don't really know how you put up with me, or even why you let me stay, but I thank.......anyway I was on my way here, and I was hungry. Hungry like I hadn't been in years. Not since after Carterson. See, I'd spent what little money I had left getting home, and divided up mama's between Rachael and Hannah, as they took care of her, so I was living on what I could find.

Water wasn't a problem, but I wasn't about to slaughter someone's cattle, and I hadn't seen any edible greens in days, and I'd had no luck sighting any animals. I was just about ready to find another job, or trade labor for food, when I spotted this rabbit. I can remember actually seeing it on a spit, all ready for eating and my stomach was growling, that rabbit made me so hungry. I took my rifle, as I fully intended to blast him to pieces, and as I took careful aim and pulled the trigger, Gal moved. I missed by less than half an inch. Well that rabbit took off, and I chased him, first on Gal, then on foot, all over this area. I flushed him out of his burrow twice. Finally I chased him up this path and into this natural theater. He had no where to go, and I had fresh rabbit for dinner. I was sitting right about where you were now. After finishing I started to notice my surroundings and found this was a well hidden natural arena, used by Indians. I spent the next two days camping out in here, and trying to figure out what I was going to say to you when I told you who I was. I knew that I was on Barkley land, and that I had come as far as I needed, but I still wasn't sure what was the proper next step. Anyway, you know the rest. I let anger take over, and was greeted by understanding and love. I come here sometimes to think. Doesn't seem like anyone else knows its here, as I haven't ever seen signs that others have been here. Have you been here Jarrod?"

Deeply touched, Jarrod replied, "No Heath, I don't think any member of the family knows that this exists."

"I know its night, but I have a few lanterns here. Would you like to take a brief look around before we head home?"

"I'd enjoy that. Just point me in the direction that we are to go, give me a lantern and let's head off." Seeing Heath's grin was reward enough as Jarrod took the second lantern, lit it, and moved out after Heath. On his tour he noticed a few things he didn't mention, such as a coffee pot, dutch oven, and other cooking utensils stored in a wooden box in a dry corner.

Heath pointed out Indian drawings and a fox burrow, as well as a beautiful rain filled pool on the north side of the arena. As they continued their circuit, Jarrod spied something that he couldn't let pass. Reaching down, he picked up a green leather glove that lay on an opened blanket. "This yours too, Heath?" he said in his best interrogatory voice, dangling the glove just out of Heath's reach.

More graceful, and quicker than a cat in flight, Heath whipped the glove from Jarrod's hand and stuffed it in his pocket. Hopefully it was to dark for Jarrod to recognize it. Colleen had been looking for it for about three months.

Remembering their day alone up here, Heath blushed as Jarrod laughingly said, "Not as innocent as you would like us to believe?"

"Jarrod, I'll make you a trade. You can remember my remarks about the stocking, if you forget you ever saw this."

"Sure thing, brother Heath, as long as you will let me use this as a picnic spot with the fair Helen."

"Anything Jarrod, let's just not tell Nick it's here, okay?" he said, valiantly trying to hide his discomfort, while thinking that Jarrod had already told the stocking secret anyway, so he had nothing to lose.

"Tell Nick! Are you crazy." Jarrod laughed. "I can guard secrets as well as you can, brother Heath." and I'll just say this one time as I know it occasionally makes you uncomfortable, thank you for sharing your story, this place, and this night with me."

"We ought to be getting back. Time to face the rain again," Heath said.

They walked in reverent silence, back to their horses, and as he was mounting Jingo, Jarrod heard a whispered "You're welcome Jarrod," carried lightly on the wind.

The return trip was much quicker, and although he returned home wet and ready for a hot bath and a stiff scotch, Jarrod, reveling in the sanctity of Heath's sharing, refused to discuss the trip with anyone.

But they all wondered. For the rest of the evening, whenever they glanced his way a small smile played on his lips, as he recalled their shared time. Some things were disturbing, some touching, and they all added up to one thing. His brother was trusting him.

Doubting that the next few days leading up to Christmas would be as wonderful as the few captured hours with his brother, Jarrod went to bed. His guess was correct.

Audra and Victoria continued making their rounds, and for a change the rain kept Nick and Heath from accompanying them. This was the only thing Nick found pleasing about the rain, as he hated polite social calls more than being wet. Jarrod did paperwork, both for his law firm and the ranch, keeping all the books up to date. He paid the bills, calculated the years profits, and juggled accounts so areas that liquid cash was readily available to help out during the rainy season. He knew he shouldn't have put it off, but this year had been different than past years and he was behind. Catching up felt good. He intended to take a last trip to town on the twenty third and sign all the papers, wish his clerk happy Christmas, and do anything else Victoria needed before the holidays.

Nick and Heath continued to work with the orchard, grove, and levees. The levees were taking a great strain as the rain refused to let up. The grove would recover and it looked like timely intervention had saved at least half the orchard as well. Work was done, but it was routine. All spare time was spent on the endless equipment repairs.

Dinner and evenings didn't differ either. They ate, then played games, while the atmosphere of anticipation lay thick in the air. Each counting down the days left until Christmas. Jarrod asked one night at dinner if anyone needed anything from town and was pleased to hear everyone but Victoria answered no, and she didn't need him to pick anything up, but wanted him to drop off a fruit cake to the Carlsons. Puddles was thriving under their attention, and Nick thought he might even make a good hunting dog with some training. The cake was to be a thank you.

"So everyone is finished with shopping?" Jarrod questioned. "I don't have the bills for some of you yet."

"Nick, you never get your shopping done." Audra scolded. "Last year you tried to give me a book and when I opened the cover it said..To Nick with love, Mother and Father Birthday 1868."

"Well we were about the same age and the material I ordered hadn't come in yet."

"I remember you saying that, and I also remember Thelma Jackson saying you ordered it December twenty fourth."

"At least I tried," he said, hoping she would change the subject. When that didn't happen, he said, "Heath, Jarrod, pool?"

"Not tonight, Jarrod answered. I want to get to town early so I'm heading up. I'll probably read a few minutes then go to bed."

"Heath?"

"Sure, Nick, want to bet?"

"Not if you have Audra as your partner," he shot back laughing. The remark had everyone smiling as they recalled the shared time in the barn a few short nights ago.

"Rack 'em up Nick, I'll break."

"Fine, I get to break next game."

"Sure."

They talked and played four games. "Not your night huh.....Heath?" Nick alternately teased and gloated between games.

"Guess not, you're on a real streak tonight," he happily bantered back. The only way anyone would have known Heath was anxious was that he lost all four games. As the games ended, everyone retired, and awoke one day closer to Christmas.

On the twenty third Jarrod awoke to a beautiful day. The rain had stopped! It was still overcast, but the rain had stopped! At breakfast, he remarked how happy he was to have waited until today to go into town.

Heath and Nick worked with the horses for a change of pace, overjoyed to do anything in the outdoors that didn't require slickers. The ranch hands were just as relieved so the corral was a happy place that day as they cheered each other on.

Audra groomed her horse, and took care of her dogs, then visited her friends; Colleen, Gloria and Virginia.

Victoria baked the Christmas cookies Nick loved, so the family could decorate them after dinner. Nick was going to be so pleased, and she was thrilled to be able to do this small thing for her son.

As Victoria baked, Audra visited, and the men broke horses, gratefully changing the routines of the past three weeks, Jarrod took care of business. He was thrilled to be out of the house and took the fruitcake to Mr. and Mrs. Carlson's and thanked them for their kindness and for Puddles.

"Is he growing up? I thought he might be a large dog. He had those big paws," Mr. Carlson said.

"We think he's a short haired pointer. Nick checked a few books and is pleased. Although Audra thinks its her dog, Nick intends to train him to hunt. Our only hold up, to hear Nick tell it, is the name Puddles!"

Thinking of Nick calling, "Come on Puddles, retrieve Puddles" had both men laughing as Jarrod took his leave. He then headed to Helens to wish her a Happy Christmas and give her a bottle of her favorite perfume from back east. He had ordered it specially for her, and it had come in the previous week. She was touched by his gift, and they made plans to meet for a drive shortly after Christmas. He intended to take her to the arena. He left her home anticipating a very good 1877, Helen at his side.