Thank God Jarrod had taken Heath aside and gently explained the annual Birthday fete, as he had in the past with other family traditions. It wasn't that Nick wouldn't explain them, he was just usually running behind with details of presents and holiday plans. Somewhere in Nick's mind Heath had been his brother for a lifetime, not just a year. So in Nick's head...why would the annual birthday week need to be explained...we've done it for years with Mother. Jarrod had quietly reminded Nick that Heath had not been with them a lifetime and then together the older Barkley men would guide the foundling into the realm of understanding.

Maybe that was it...the indecision of birthday week. Heath got up and wandered to his bedroom window. If he could come to a decision about the birthday, maybe he could still get a few hours of sleep In his mind he replayed the interpretation Jarrod and Nick had given him. Mother didn't need gifts, what she wanted from her children was a day with each of them. Each child was to plan their gift of time, selecting a day during the week of Victoria's birthday. Any day that week was available except the actual birthday, when the family would share dinner, complete with cake and churned ice cream. Picking a day wasn't hard...it was what to do with her once your day was selected.

Nick chose Thursday, planning on packing a picnic lunch and taking his mother on a tour of the ranch, showing off all the new improvements. It was Monday morning and Jarrod would be taking Victoria overnight to San Francisco to enjoy the premier of a new Opera. Audra was planning a shopping trip and an afternoon tea with some lady friends on Wednesday. None of the boys thought shopping was all that creative for Audra, but then she had not thought Jarrod and Nick to be all that creative either. Victoria's birthday was Saturday leaving Heath with Friday, just four days away! How could Heath possibly entertain making a memorable day for this woman he loved.

As Heath considered Victoria's birthday, he wished he could have made just one birthday special for Leah. Maybe that was his problem. Growing up birthday's were celebrated with hugs and kisses, perhaps a long walk, picking a hand full of wild flowers along the way. Like Victoria, Leah appreciated time spent with her child. It wasn't as if Leah didn't have needs, and he wished, just once, he could have bought her a memorable gift. No sense dwelling on the past. He remembered the one time his Mama gave him a birthday gift...the Modoc, when he was sixteen. He could never figure out how she had done it! Heath never questioned the gift, he simply cherished the Indian pony. ###.. Heath moved to his dresser, opened the top drawer and lifted out an old tattered ladies handkerchief, that belonged to his Mother. Carefully, he unfolded it, smiling as the treasure came into view. Clutching the prize, he walked back to the window to allow the moon's glow to highlight the small heart locket. The words on the back finally had meaning to him..".Loved and Adored", Tom.

He found the hinge and unfastened it, opening the single heart into three. Inside two tiny photos...one of his young mother and one of him at seven, the other slot remained empty. The chain, now broken, still was attached to the piece. That's the way it had always been...just the two of them. Both Leah and Heath had thought the cherished gift was lost, never to be found. Heath remembered how she cried the day the necklace had been lost. They searched to no avail and assumed that some lucky patron at the hotel, where she worked, had claimed it as their own.

Hannah surprised him a few weeks ago, when during a visit, she presented it to him. She'd found the treasured piece, while packing to move to Colville. Heath had not shared the reclaimed piece of memory with the family. The sentiment might be hurtful to Victoria and he didn't want that. But now floods of childhood memories had been brought back by the locket's return. The forgotten words on the back, that meant nothing to a boy, now meant volumes to the man the boy had become.

For the first time in his life, he had something in common with Tom Barkley. He took a seat in the chair close to the window, shaking his head!...He had fallen into the same triangle as his father. He loved both Leah and Victoria, not one more than the other.

Over the last year, the similarities between the two women had warmed Heath's heart. There was so much Leah in Victoria that it was like...he had never lost her. That's possibly what happened to Tom Barkley. He was married, loved his wife...but they were goin' through a rough time. It was fate that had brought Leah and Tom together, thanks to a brutal beating Tom had received. Leah nursed the man back from his injuries and possibly in Tom's delirium...he mistook her for Victoria. By the time the wounded man was whole, he had grown to love Leah...the woman who though younger...was an eerie duplicate of the wife he loved in Stockton.

Tom's promise to return came with the gift of this locket. The only pricey thing Leah owned, and the trinket which held a deep promise, did cost her. Her reputation now tarnished because her love produced a fatherless child. Best it was lost years ago, seemed it only continued to give her hope that he'd return to her. She knew better, Tom had written and explained that though he did love her, he also loved Victoria and they had a family. Likely as Heath grew Leah would have felt it necessary to sell her cherished locket for more important items...like food.

Heath suddenly realized he had reminisced the night away. He was already whipped and the day had not begun! Not good for a cowboy to work without his sleep...especially three nights in row. He got dressed and set out for downstairs...coffee...he needed coffee. Heading downstairs, he wished he would find his old friend and confidant, Silas, waiting for him. Silas ....he'd know what to do. Heath paused on the steps in a reflective moment of silence for his dear friend.

He still was not comfortable with Rosa. He knew in time he'd get to know Rosa better, she was nice and trying so hard to please all of the family. He knew that Silias would want him to move on, treating Rosa with kindness and respect. Heath did enjoy the Spanish bantering he and Rosa shared. Rosa couldn't help with suggestions for Victoria's birthday, she was just getting to know the Barkley matriarch.

Heath arrived home Tuesday thinking dinner was most likely over. He was so tired and lost in thought that he barely heard the chatter from the parlor. Hearing his name, he was drawn back to reality. " Darn!" He thought, I should of come in the back way, all he wanted was a bath and some sleep. Slowly, he walked toward the family. They were all just too cheery for his level of fatigue and mood.

"Heath, we have been waiting dinner so you could join us." Victoria was beaming, obviously Jarrod's gift went well. His Mother's joyous mood was almost annoying to him and he hated himself for the negativity welling up inside him.

"You know Mother, I need a bath and some sleep. I don't want to hold you up any further, go ahead and eat." Heath urged, trying to be polite.

"Come on Heath, birthday week tradition, everyone has dinner together so Mother can tells us about her day." Audra scolded. He really wasn't ready for Audra's chattering all night! She was right, dinner each night as a family was part of the tradition. He didn't realize he had started playing with the button on his sleeve and his eyes were lost looking at the design in the carpet.

"Audra, your brother looks awfully tired, Heath, go ahead with your bath and head to bed. I'll have Rosa make a sandwich for you and I'll bring it up and say good night." Victoria sensed something was wrong, more than tiredness, maybe he didn't feel well.

"Nah, I'm sorry, I'll wash up and be right down. Just slipped my mind about makin' it to dinner all week. I should have been in sooner, had to track some strays and they got further out than I thought." Heath tried to smile, he didn't want to mess up family traditions.

He turned and hurried up the steps, he didn't want to make eye contact with any of them.They were all starting to know him to well, they'd know he was bothered about something and as tired as he felt...too many questions and he'd end up wagging his tongue and upsetting one or all of them.

The water felt good on his face, but stung his tired eyes. He combed his hair and brushed his teeth getting really close to the mirror, taking a good look at himself. Even Heath thought he looked like something the cat drug in!

"Heath Barkley, what's your problem!" He thought angrily to himself while staring at his reflection in the mirror. "You have this fine family and you're moping around like you've lost your last friend. It's only a birthday! If you don't exactly make it stand out, there is always next year. Just plan a few hours with her and get past it! Now get your sorry behind dress and down stairs for dinner!" He felt somewhat better after bawling himself out. No one could beat him up worse than he'd do to himself.. He buttoned the last button at the top of his shirt and then decided to leave it unbutton. He trotted down the stairs and entered the dinning room where the family was already seated. As he sat down, Rosa starting bringing out the meal. He'd be fine, Audra was asking more than enough questions about the opera and what else was happening in San Francisco. Jarrod sat smiling, knowing he had please his Mother. Nick just kept shoveling in the food, nodding and adding a comment here and there.

"Doesn't the opera sound just wonderful Heath?" Audra asked, catching her blond brother totally off guard.

"What...?" Heath fumbled, he had no clue what she had said.

"Where are you Heath Barkley?" You've been somewhere else the whole meal. Have you heard anything at all about Jarrod's gift?" Audra quizzed.

Okay, now she was stepping over the line! She wasn't his Mother, for God's sake she was his little sister. Where did she get the right to scold him like he was a child?

"I tried to tell you I was tired, I'm sorry, If you'll excuse me, I'll head up to bed." Heath replied sharply.

He walked over to Victoria, after kissing her on the cheek, he whispered he was sorry and left the room.

Even Audra was quiet, as the family looked at each other wondering what had just happened. Nick started to get up when Victoria laid her hand on his and ask him to sit back down.

"Something's buggin' that boy," Nick offered, "I'll go talk to him."

"Your brother is tired, I could see it in his face. We'll see how he is tomorrow, maybe it's best if we leave him be for now." Victoria smiled openly, but in her heart she knew her youngest son was troubled about something. But what?

Frustrated with himself, he fell on the bed feeling even lower than before! Gosh, he didn't want to upset anyone. Why couldn't Audra just leave him be. Now he knew what they were doing, sittin' around the table havin' a "what's the matter with Heath" session. Being part of family was sure hard sometimes. Tomorrow he'd pay for this little display of worry and weariness. All he wanted to do was plan a nice day for the woman! He loved her, just like the others. It seems so easy for them, always so easy. Would it ever get easy for him...he wondered. Then there was still the issue of the reoccurring dream. He prayed a quick prayer asking God to allow him to sleep. His thoughts took him to slumber, clothes still on, right down to his boots.

There was no response as she tapped on the door, after spotting the light filtering through. She quietly called his name before entering.

"Heath, I've brought you something to eat." Victoria carried in a plate for her young cowboy.

She smiled at what she found, there he was totally dressed lying the wrong direction across the bed. His feet still on the floor. The scene reminded her of Nick when he was small. He would play so hard that sometimes when she'd send him up to get ready for bed, he'd fall asleep before he could get his clothes changed.

"I guess he wasn't kidding when he said he was tired." She thought out loud, not seeing Nick standing at the door.

"When the boy says he's tired, I guess we need to listen. He's been puttin' in some mighty long days." Nick condoned.

He came into the room and removed Heath's boots without his brother even stirring. Nick picked up Heath's legs and swung them onto the bed. As he did this Heath curled into a ball never showing signs of being disrupted. Nick watched as Victoria laid her hand on Heath's cheek. There was a bit too much color for her liking, especially when he was sleeping.

"He feels a little warm to me." Victoria seemed concerned.

"Mother, you know how he gets when he's tired and riled up. Let's leave before we wake him up." Nick urged, knowing how embarrassed his brother would be if he woke to find them hovering over him.

"You're right Nick." Victoria nodded, taking a quilt out of Heath's closet and gently covered her sleeping son.

Nick blew out the lamp and closed the door behind them.

"I wish we could make that brother of mine understand he could sleep till the sun is at least comin' up."

"You're a good one to talk Nick Barkley." Victoria smiled as they came down the steps.

Rosa was busy cooking breakfast and the smell of hot baked bread and bacon frying was in the air. They both looked around, not finding who they had hoped to see.

"Rosa, what time did Heath have breakfast?" Victoria asked.

"Mrs. Barkley, I have been working since five and I have not seen Mr. Heath. He's not had breakfast in the kitchen, like he normally does all week." Rosa informed as she continued at the stove. "You and Mr. Nick are early today, would you like to eat now or wait on the others?"

"We'll go ahead in dining room and talk, the normal time with the rest of the family will be fine." Victoria told her as she looked around to see if there were any signs of Heath packing something or dirty dishes in the sink. All she found was the plate she had carried up last night, still covered and when she looked the sandwich was still there.

"Speak for yourself Mother, I could use a snack now and breakfast later." Nick's response made Rosa laugh. The servant grabbed several pieces of bacon and two slices of bread and hand it to Nick.

"Thank you Rosa, you've made me a happy man." Nick quickly made the food items into a bacon sandwich and poured a tall glass of orange juice. He followed his mother to the dining room and took his seat. He could tell she was worried, so he offered a solution.

"Don't worry, just enjoy your day with Audra. I'll ride out this morning and talk to him. I know something is worrying him, he just likes to try to think things through before he asks for help."

"That would make me feel better, Nick. I just hope he isn't making himself sick. You can't go without sleep and food, especially as hard as you two work." She patted her middle son's arm, as he drained the juice from his glass. She enjoyed watching her boys eat, it amazed her seeing the volume and the speed in which they could clean a plate.

Nick spotted the wagon up ahead and saw his brother placing a new post. After Coco was tethered under a shade tree, Nick walked to join his brother. Nick noticed a large scrape and the start of a bruise on Heath's face.

"You okay?" Nick asked as he tapped his brother's cheek.

"Just a scratch, I'm fine." Heath answered as he tacked the barbed wire back to the post. "What brings you out here...on a fishin' trip?" Heath didn't want to admit that his fatigue had literally caused him to trip over some supplies and land face down onto the pile of wooden post.

"You could say that, Little Brother." Nick smiled. "Did you have breakfast?"

Nick held up his saddle bag and pulled out a bundle that Rosa had prepared.

"I have some biscuits and bacon and I'm willing to share if you'll talk to me." Nick tempted his brother, knowing good and well that Heath should be hungry.

"Nick just get to the point, what do you want? I have to finish this and I need to go to town this afternoon to pick up more fencing supplies." Heath's weariness was showing.

"Look Heath, you have us a little worried, do you need to talk...are you feeling okay? You look like a darn raccoon, those dark circles under your eyes are bigger every day." Nick knew this was not going to be easy. Getting Heath to talk when didn't have the notion, was likely to result in a powerful left hook to the chin.

"Nick, you wearin' an apron today? You're as bad as Mother and Audra." Heath responded.

Nick hoped the smart remark would be followed with a crooked smile, but it didn't come. Nope, his brother didn't like this brotherly visit one bit! Well too bad, Nick thought.

"No Heath, no apron...just concern for my brother who obviously is bugged about something. Mother's worried that her fair haired boy is sick or something." Nick's tone was hurtful and he knew it. He hoped it would control Heath's attitude regarding what appeared to be an invasion of his privacy.

Heath's head dropped, he stared at his boots. Nick had won, funny it didn't seem like much of a victory. Nick grabbed his canteen and sat down against the shade tree, then unfolding the bundle revealed the provisions.

"You gonna stand there all day admiring your boots?" Nick grinned, trying to show his brother that he wasn't as irritated as he had sounded.

Heath walked over and joined his older brother, taking the food offered. Heath rubbed his forehead and leaned back against the tree with his eyes closed. For a minute Nick thought maybe his brother had fallen fast asleep. Then in a soft voice, Heath began to speak.

"I'm not sick, I just haven't been able to sleep and my stomach has been bothering me some. If I could get some sleep, I'd be fine." Heath admitted.

"Sleep huh, are the bad dreams back?" Nick was concerned, he knew that over the last few months the nightmare that tortured his brother had stopped.

"Not those dreams, a new one over and over every night." Heath answered never opening his eyes, maybe it made it easier for him to talk. "Both Mama and Mother are calling me...I'm standing between them and I don't know who to go to...is it wrong for me to love them both?" As Heath finish his question, he turned to his brother searching his face for the response he craved.

For a brief second Nick was lost in his brother's eyes. Over the last year Nick learned that Heath communicated more with his eyes than he did his mouth. The question his younger brother voiced was heartfelt and hurting.

"Of course not Heath, why would it be wrong?" Nick was uncertain where this question was coming from.

"It's like a part of me feels so disloyal to her..." Heath had trouble explaining his aching heart.

"Heath, no...Leah sent you looking for us, she knew that Father was dead. I think she hoped you'd find a family...including Mother." Nick comforted.

Nick thought for a few seconds and continued, "Mother has said several times that you joining the family completed the circle for her. She knew Father had been unfaithful. You bridged the empty place in her heart. It says a lot about Father, doesn't it? Two women loved him so completely that they both made such difficult sacrifices. Mother stayed with a man who had an affair with another woman and Leah loved him enough to let him go, to stay with his family. She had reason and need and yet would not betray her love for him. And now you are being loved by those same two women, they love his son just like they loved him.

Heath gave his brother a smile feeling a burden lift from his wearied heart. He was suddenly so tired he could barely keep his eyes open. Nick had one more question and he felt it couldn't go unanswered.

"Heath, if you are having trouble with this whole birthday tradition...you can always bow out. Mother would never want you to be troubled over it."

"No, I want to do something for her...I just can't come up with something special. I don't want to disappoint her." Heath was noticeably unsettled.

"Heath, don't ya see, it doesn't matter what you plan. You could sit on the porch all day, but as long as you talked with her and she learned more about you and what you're up to, she'd be happy. The day is more about her learning about us than actually doing something for her. We are all so busy and the dinner hour doesn't give her enough dirt on us. Like I bet she'd like to hear about that crush you have on Jenna." Nick gave a sly smile at his shocked brother.

"How'd you know...I." Heath started but was interrupted..

"Forget it Heath, you blush every time that girl comes near ya. Why don't you just ask her to the barn dance in a couple weeks. For Pete's Sake you'll be in a rocker before you get the nerve." Nick could see Heath was turning a corner, that downtrodden cowboy seemed much better.

"Well Little Brother, let me help you finish this section and then you can head to town. Maybe you can even catch a nap before dinner." Nick suggested.

"I promise I'll be better company at dinner, don't worry Big Brother." Heath smiled.

When they were finished and they were ready to leave, Nick felt a hand on his back,

"Nick, thanks...you helped a lot." Heath smiled that grin Nick wanted to see.

"Anytime, Little Brother, anytime." Nick answered as he mounted and turned back toward the ranch.

CHAPTER TWO

Heath made it to town and back to the ranch in good time. After caring for the horses and storing the wagon with supplies for tomorrow's chore, he made his way to the house. It was quiet. Audra and Victoria were out for the day and Jarrod was in town. Nick was still out on the range. Heath made his way first to his bedroom and then to a nice hot bath. He easily could have fallen asleep in the tub. The warm water was like a sweet lullaby. He forced himself to leave the soothing water and made his way to his room. There on his dresser, he found a sandwich and tall glass of milk. Rosa must have heard him and wanted to make sure he had some lunch. He'd thank her later. His stomach was feeling much better and the pounding in his head was gone. In a few bites the sandwich was history. He laid down thinking about what Nick had said, smiling to himself. He liked having older brothers...having a best friend. Their relationship just kept getting stronger and he wondered what the future would bring. Funny, the last few days he dreaded Friday's approach, now he wanted to dream of years to come. In minutes...he was fast asleep.

Everyone arrived home, one by one. Chatter filled the house. It pleased Nick when he arrived to find the wagon stowed and his younger brother's bedroom door closed as he passed.

Nick was buttoning his shirt when a knock came to his door. In just a few steps he crossed the large room to receive his visitor. He knew who it would be, he was surprised it had taken her this long.

"Come in Mother, I was expecting you." Nick smiled, taking her hand and leading her to a high back leather chair.

"I wanted to give you enough time to finish your bath, but I must say, I could hardly wait to speak with you." Victoria was anxious. "Did you speak with your brother?"

"That I did Mother, he wasn't real open to discussion at first...but he came around and we had a good talk. He's fine, sufferin' from lack of sleep and been sportin' a headache and nervous stomach." Nick informed.

"Did he say what was bothering him, do you think he upset about planning a day with me?" Victoria's purpose of these special days with her children were to be joyous, she didn't want Heath to do something he was not comfortable performing. That would defeat the purpose.

"He's been having a dream. It has you and Leah in it and you both are calling to him. He doesn't want to betray either of you. He wants to have his day with you on Friday. He wants to make it special and just isn't sure how to do that." Nick moved and knelt next to his mother, I think I explained that all you want is a chance to have some uninterrupted talk with your kids. Told him you were lookin' for the skinny on us."

Victoria kissed Nick's cheek. "Who says Nick Barkley doesn't have a tender bone in his body."

"How about I go wake up your youngest son, so he can get ready for dinner." Nick offered his arm and they strolled down the hall toward Heath's room.

Heath felt warm and comfortable, he realized suddenly that he was in his bed. Looking towards the window he saw the evening sun making it's way to the horizon and stretched to grab his watch to check the time. Seeing that several hours had passed, he laid there thankful for the peaceful sleep without the dream of Victoria and Leah. Once more he found his thoughts drifting to Friday, his day with Victoria. He laid there formulating his plan when a soft knock came to the door.

"Come on in," He drawled, his hand lingering on his bare chest.

It surprised Heath to see Nick enter his room and close the door behind him. Thinking on the man most perceived to be loud and outspoken, Heath smiled warmly. Nick Barkley only surfaced for those he cared deeply for. Heath had been the receiver of the many moods of Nick Barkley from anger and mistrust to loving kindness. Today as in other days over the last year he had received the gentle, loving guidance of a big brother...his friend.

"Hey Buddy, did you get some sleep?" Nick asked, sitting next to Heath on the bed.

"Sure did...felt good," Heath answered stretching his lean body, and casting a crooked grin at his brother, "Must be the company I keep."

"Ready for dinner, Sleeping Beauty?" Nick teased, "You ain't gonna have time tomorrow for any naps. I'll be with Mother all day."

"I'm fine, the nap helped and I'll just call it an early night." Heath answered shoving his brother off the bed so that he could stand.

"Okay Little Brother, I'm movin'. I'll tell Mother you'll be down in a few minutes." Nick smiled as he left closing the door behind him.

Heath paused a moment, reflecting on the many turns his life had taken this year. This new family of his was worth every bump and twist on that road.

Dinner was pleasant. As always Audra's unending chatter filled the room. Everyone laughed as she not only showed the new hats both she and Victoria purchased, she placed them on top of her head and paraded around the dining room table.

It did appear that both Jarrod and Audra had made Victoria very happy. Her smile was so contented, so satisfying. Heath had gotten away with no major comment about his cheek being scraped and bruised, so he figured that Nick has already warned them. The family made their way to the parlor where Nick was giving Victoria just a few details about their day tomorrow. At a break in the conversation, Heath excused himself calling it a night. He moved toward Victoria to give his customary good night kiss on the cheek. She stood and met him with an embrace. It seemed they both held on for a few minutes longer than normal, needing to express the bond that ran deep between them.

Heath was just about to call it a night when he heard Victoria at the door.

"Heath, may I come in?"

"I was just going to blow out the lamp." Heath greeted, while shifting to a sitting position.

"I tried to stop myself from feeling this necessary, but since I will not see you until tomorrow evening, I felt the need to check on you due to that nasty scrape."

Victoria teased him, "I don't need to get the liniment you and your brother hate so much, do I? It's what a mother does, Heath. I hope you'll indulge my need to take care you." Victoria saw his relaxed smile, knowing her mother's instinct to speak to him privately was the correctly acted upon..

"I don't care much for the liniment, but I do like you caring for me." Heath warmed her heart with his words. "Don't worry about the scrape, I'm fine, just a little clumsy."

"Are you feeling better than last evening?" Victoria asked as she sat beside him, rubbing his arm, watching his eyes for the truth.

"Much better, Mother. I hope to get several hours of good sleep tonight and finish the repairs on that fenceline tomorrow." Heath responded.

"I'm looking forward to Friday, maybe we could do some fishing." Victoria suggested in an attempt to give the boy an idea.

"Now, I do believe this day is mine to plan. Don't you worry, I have been thinkin' on it, how did you know that fishin' might be a part of it?" Heath laid back against the pillow with a yawn.

"I didn't, I know you enjoy fishing and I wanted you to know that I did too. Your father and I spent many a Sunday afternoon, fishing and planning the future." Victoria informed as she kissed Heath's forehead.

"Good night Son." Victoria stood and blew out the lamp. She paused at the door taking one last look before she closed the door.

Just as with the afternoon nap, Heath's night went uninterrupted. He was up at his normal time and out working by daybreak. He wanted the repairs finished, so he could check the herd by noon. He knew he could count on McCall to handle the men, but he wanted to make an appearance. Then he needed to work on some arrangements for Friday. He basically had the day planned and had a few lingering details to tend to.

Dinner Thursday night had been much like the rest of the week, full of excitable chatter. Once again Heath thought Victoria simply glowed with joy. This week truly did hold deep meaning to her and Heath understood more each day as he watched her take in the conversation shared at dinner. As they made their way to the billiard table Nick quietly asked Heath if he was ready for tomorrow. The quick smile gave the older brother the answer he wanted.

Heath once again called it an early night. He wanted to be at his best tomorrow and for that to happen he needed sleep. He was feeling much better, but still a little tired from the missed sleep this week. As he said his good night, he hugged Victoria and requested her to meet him at seven for breakfast. She stood back from him and shook her head,

"Heath, your day starts long before seven and I do not want to miss a minute with you tomorrow. If it's all the same with you, I'll meet you in the kitchen for breakfast at your normal time. Just tell me what time that is." Victoria questioned.

"Mother, we could wait 'til your normal time, but if you insist, meet me at five." Heath smiled at her willingness to match his schedule.

"I'll be there Young Man." Victoria called to him as he climbed the stairs with a chuckle.

He once again dreamed the dream. There he was between them again, both women calling to him. This time he wasn't troubled with feelings of doubt or betrayal. He looked toward Leah and extended his right hand and then to Victoria and extended his left hand. They both held tight to him as they joined together. They both were happy and so was he, safe between his mothers. One who gave him birth and the one who loved him like she had. One that cared for him through childhood and the other that was caring for him into manhood. Heath didn't wake, the dream faded and he continued in a peaceful sleep.

There had been times over the last several months when his guard had dropped and he had make some comments referring to times gone by, but to quickly his face would flush and he'd try to hide the embarrassment he felt for his glimpse of memory.

She hoped he would open up a bit. She wanted to tell him things about Tom and how much Heath was like his father. She wanted to hear about Leah, the other woman. Years ago she hated the woman when she had heard the words of Tom's affair. The years had mellowed her anguish and coming to know Heath and the little history she did know, she now felt a covenant between the two. They both loved Tom and even when Leah was in her greatest need, she didn't rise up to receive what she and her son deserved. Leah's son, was now her son! Victoria's love for Heath was true and deep. How quickly Tom's son had captured her heart, mutually surprising them. Victoria knew Heath didn't understand it completely,... nor did she. Nevertheless, it was genuine and caused deep emotion for both Mother and Son.

Victoria made her way towards the kitchen. Pausing on the steps, she smiled at the music she heard. Heath was whistling and Rosa was humming "Amazing Grace". She watched as they both worked, no words spoken or sung...just the soft tune in unison. Victoria wasn't sure the two performers were even aware that the other had joined in making it a duet.

"The two of you sound cheery this morning." Victoria smiled, as she took them both by surprise.

The tune stopped as both Heath and Rosa turned to greet their intruder.

"Mother, good morning," Heath greeted with a bright smile, "You have a seat, Rosa has cooked up a special breakfast for us." Heath held the chair, as Rosa greeted Victoria with a plate of what looked to be scrambled eggs with red and green peppers and onions. A plate of sausages and biscuits were placed in the center of the small table. Rosa poured coffee, while Heath served the juice. Rosa left the room to give mother and son privacy to discuss their day. As was the custom at all Barkley meals, Heath folded his hands in preparation for grace.

"If you don't mind Mother, I'd like to do the prayin' this morning." Heath spoke softly.

"Certainly Heath, I'd like that." Victoria was usually was the one to offer the prayer in the family's behalf.

"Lord, Thank You for this special day. Thank you for Victoria Barkley...my Mother. For her love and acceptance and for making me feel like I matter. Thank you also for Mama, I am certainly a blessed man to be given two such fine women in my life. Amen."

When Heath lifted his head, he felt Victoria's hand on his. He saw the glisten of tears in her eyes and the warm smile. "Heath Barkley, this day is off to a grand start. Let's eat and continue our day." Victoria's heart was already full of emotion and the day had only begun. Heath's sincerity could never be questioned. He had already shared more in his short prayer, than she thought she might get out of him all day.

The first stop was the orphanage. The ride was quieter than Victoria had hoped, but she resolved herself to the fact that they had a full day and Heath would need a little time to warm up to the idea of conversation.

The two Barkley's were not out of the buggy when the bevy of children came running to greet them. Victoria watch as Heath was hugged, kissed and tugged on by the children. Their admiration for him was obvious. Victoria couldn't help but notice that in the mist of all the attention her son was receiving, his eyes searched the yard for someone. Then she watched as his blue eyes found her, Jenna was standing at the door laughing at the children who had Heath under attack..

"Okay children, why don't we allow Heath and Mrs. Barkley to come inside." Jenna instructed as she used her arms to gather the youngsters, just as a mama hen gathers her chicks

Heath assisted Victoria from the buggy and held her hand as they came toward the building.

"Mother, I thought you might enjoy a stop here today. I know that it has been several months since you been out to the orphanage.

"Heath, this was a lovely idea. Now that you share an interest in volunteering here with your sister, I haven't had the need to come. I know the children would rather play with you and Audra, than sit still and have me read to them." Victoria shared.

"I don't know about that, Mother. They always ask about you and Audra must end each visit with a story. I think they miss seeing you more than you know." Heath answered as they followed the children inside.

Sister Joseph and Jenna had the children line up near the piano, as Heath and Victoria took a seat.

"Mrs. Barkley, the children would like to sing the birthday song to you." Jenna smiled, as she sat down and began to play. The little voices joined in song, some louder that the others, some a little off key.

When they were finished, the youngest of the group stepped forward. From behind his back he gave Victoria a handmade card. All the children had signed their names to the greeting. Then Lilly, a sweet girl who looked to be about ten stepped forward and gave Victoria a bouquet of yellow roses.

"Mrs. Barkley, we are givin' ya roses cause Jenna says Mr. Heath says them are your favorites. Happy Birthday Ma'am!"

Victoria hugged each child and thanked them for the wonderful gift. Sister Joseph suggested that she and Victoria have some tea while Heath and Jenna took the children outside to burn off a little energy. Victoria gave a nod of approval to Heath. She knew he wanted this to be her day and if she wanted to move on, then they would.

The women chatted as they watched the children, not just the small ones, but the two big kids having as much fun as the young ones.

"They make quite a team with these children, Victoria." Sister Joseph spoke.

"Yes, I can see that. Jenna is a delightful girl. I remember when she was small and so ill for such a long time." Victoria remembered a sickly, skinny sad child.

"We thought we had lost her a few times, you'd never know it now...just look at her. She is a real beauty and not just on the outside." Sister Joseph contributed.

" Jenna, thank you for all you did today to help make this day special for Mother. I didn't even tell you we were coming, how did you know?" Heath quizzed.

"Cowboy, don't you remember seeing Sister Joseph in town the other day? You mentioned that you were spending this day with your mother and that you may stop out to visit. I know how you think and if you were thinkin' about it, I knew you'd be here Heath Barkley." Jenna smiled. "You and Audra had told me about Victoria's birthday a few weeks ago. She has been a long time friend to the orphanage and we were going to make her the card either way. When we saw you pull up, Sister Joseph snuck out to cut the flowers."

"Jenna, thank you. I was wonderin'...in couple weeks there's gonna be a barn dance. I was hopin' you'd allow me to...well, I was thinkin'...maybe you'd like to go with me." Heath's face blushed and he stared down at this shoes. He wanted her to say yes so badly that he thought his heart would beat right out of his chest. This girl could sure give him the strangest feeling down deep in his gut. He had liked other girls before, even loved a few or so he thought. This girl was different, he liked her and was so comfortable with her. He bravely decided to look into those green eyes of hers.

"Heath, I am flattered that you'd ask me. I 'd like nothing better than to spend some time with you without all these children around, but I really don't know how to dance and even if I did, I just don't have the proper attire. I guess I must say no, but thank you." Jenna's response sounded sad. Heath saw the hurt in her eyes and ran after her as she headed to the house.

"Jenna, I can teach you to dance. A man doesn't grow up in a house filled with women and not learn how to dance. Audra tells me I'm quite good. We can have our own dance, out at the ranch. How about it?" Heath hoped that Jenna would find this acceptable. He hoped she meant it when she said she wanted to spend time with him.

"Heath, I'd like that very much." Jenna answered with a hug and a light kiss on his cheek.

Heath walked back to the house and collected Victoria and her gifts. Indeed this was a good day.

The blanket was spread under the old shade tree near the lake, high in the North Pasture. It had become one of Heath's favorite spots. Today he learned that it was also Tom Barkley's favorite place to think and relax. The day was going faster than Heath could ever have imagined. As they prepared to eat Heath's homemade lunch, he opened his heart and gave her a gift. A special treasure, one that was difficult for the quiet, private cowboy.

"Mother, I understand that what you want most from spending this day with me is to learn more about me. I know it's what you wanted from all of us, there's most likely more about me you'd like to know than I could guess. What I'm tryin' to say is...well, anything you'd like to ask me today, I'll try to give you an answer."

Victoria reached for his hand, knowing she was getting a deep piece of his heart this day. Her smile told him how pleased she was with his willingness to give answers to many questions.

"I bet I can guess your favorite color..." Victoria hedged, "Blue?"

Heath gave her that shy smile she found so endearing, and nodded.

"Mama's favorite too, just like her eyes..." Heath shared.

"Tell me why you have such an unquenchable appetite for apples, Heath Barkley. I remember that first night, after the fire, when you came back to our empty house and could have taken anything! The only item you took, other than the money that had been given to you, was a hat full of apples." Victoria laughed, remembering that night, that seemed so long ago.

Heath shared in the laughter, "I was real hungry that night. Me and my horse could both share those apples."

His eyes told that he was taking a journey to his past, "There was two big old apple trees not far from our house in Strawberry. The trees stood tall on unowned land. Me and Mama would walk there and fill our baskets full of the fruit. Mama and Hannah must of figured out fifty ways or more to use those apples. They sure were a blessing, many times it was all the food we had. I know that lots of folks might have quite a dislike for them, after having a steady diet of the fruit for so many years, but they are part of a good memory. I can't look at an apple without thinkin' of Mama..."

Victoria's eye's filled and she looked heavenward, amazed at what a special woman could have raised such a fine man. Someone who's gentle soul had touched her deeply.

Victoria asked questions of childhood and school and the things he enjoyed most in life. Even silly questions from when he received his first kiss, to his favorite childhood game. There were some serious questions too, Heath shared with her the pain of having a friend die in his arms on a Mississippi battlefield and his fear of not leaving Caterson alive. She shared with him stories of his father and told him of the many attributes of Tom, she now saw in him.

Both mother and son had settled into the quiet of the nature around them. Victoria had learned a lot about her blond cowboy and no longer felt the need to continue asking questions. She felt satisfied, full with stories and details making her feel closer yet to this son. She knew in her heart as she pondered all that had been said that there would be many more times in the future when she and Heath would share days like this one. She knew with each new revelation of who this boy was, he would get a bigger and bigger piece of her heart.

She looked at him and saw his eyes growing weary.

"Heath, are you sleeping better?"

"Yes, fishin' always makes me feel like nappin'." He smiled.

"Mother, may I ask you a question?" Heath seemed more serious than he had all day.

"Heath, what a silly question, you may ask me anything, anytime." Victoria encouraged. He hesitated, he needed to know and found it hard to produce the words.

"Do you hate her...my Mama?" His eyes looked deep into her face, piercing her very soul for the answer.

Victoria took a second to collect her thoughts, she wasn't expecting this to be the question he'd ask.

"Sweetheart, I'll be honest with you, when I first found out about the affair, I needed to blame someone. I did place that blame on Leah. I suppose a part of me did hate her. She had the ability to take away the man I loved. Oh, I knew it was his fault, and as he explained he had not told her that he was married, with children...then how could I fault her. She enjoyed and loved the same things in him that I did. She thought he was available. I had gotten past the hate, maybe never the heartache. Then you arrived! It rekindled the hurt, the mistrust, but it was all about Tom. Your mother must have loved him beyond belief to have chosen not to contact him regarding your birth. No Heath, I don't hate her. She gave me you, a gift beyond measure. I somehow feel like I share a convenant with Leah. We both love and have loved the same men, you and your father."

They both had tears in their eyes when Victoria finished. Heath pulled his Mama's handkerchief from his pocket.

"Mother, I'd like you to have this."

Victoria watched as Heath gently removed the small locket.

"Tom Barkley gave this to Mama the day he left to return to Stockton. She wore it for years and then it was lost. Hannah returned it to me a few weeks ago. I had it repaired and shined it up. Seems to me that one of my mother's should always be the owner." Heath took the locket and scooting over behind Victoria fasten the clasp behind her neck.

Victoria opened the heart and found three photos. In the center a boyish Heath, and on either side were his mothers....Victoria and Leah. She turned the heart over and ran her fingers over the inscription.

"Mother, I hope I haven't hurt you by passing this on to you. In a way it makes me feel like all of us are a family. The three of us in Tom Barkley's heart. I had no idea when I came here...I'd grow to love you so much. Seems like the closer I was getting to you, the more I loved you... the further I was getting from Mama. I was losing her. I wasn't sure it was okay to love you both, maybe I had to pick one. Believe it or not, it was Nick who cleared that up for me." Heath smiled, remembering the conversation with his older brother.

Victoria noticed that though Heath was wearing a smile, there were tears in his eyes.

"Sweetheart, first let me say that you will always have both Leah and me in your heart. You'll never lose her, it's just that maybe you can rely on me now to do all those things she would do if she were here. I believe that God in heaven allows Tom and Leah to gaze down upon us. I feel their spirit's sometimes, especially when you are sick or in trouble. I never feel alone, I can sense their presence. I will value the locket, it has deep meaning to you and that makes it very special to me. I'd be proud to wear it, you're right, it represents your family.