Chapter 5

“You have got to be kiddin’ me!” Marie raged as she stalked about the confines of the map room. “How can you justify us not going to get Logan when we know exactly where he is?”

“Now, Rogue, I realize that you are upset, but you have to understand--”

Marie shot Scott a glare that silenced him in an instant. “What Ah understand is that ya all want t’ abandon Logan! What did he do that was so terrible that you don’t wanna help save him? He saved mah life and Ah think we should help save his.”

There was a long silence as the four adults in the room exchanged looks. It was then that something clicked in Marie’s mind. Something that she had never though of while they were busy reprimanding her about using Cerebro. Or when they had showed her the location of Magneto’s island hideout. Something that was just becoming clear at this very moment.

“Ya knew all along, didn’t ya?” Marie whispered, tears filling her eyes. “Ya all knew where he was the whole time. The past four years ya knew that he was with Magneto and ya didn’t tell me? How could ya do such a thing?”

“Because we fully believed that Logan was there voluntarily,” the Professor admitted, sitting back heavily in his chair.

Marie began to laugh hysterically when she heard that, her dark eyes suddenly wild. “Ya thought that Logan joined up with the same man that tried t’ kill me? Ah thought ya were some genius, Professor! Logan would never do somethin’ like that and ya know it, Professor!”

“Now, Rogue--”

“Ah don’t wanna hear it, Professor!” Marie screamed, stalking towards the door. “If yer gonna treat Logan like that, Ah’ll go look for him mahself. I don’t need yer help!”

Before anyone would protest, Marie turned and bolted from the map room. She was in shock by what she had just learned. There was no possible way they could rationalize what they had done. The lot of them had left Logan to fend for himself knowing exactly what kind of trouble he was in.

Marie ran the entire way to her room. She slammed the door behind her and flopped down on the bed. Reaching out, Marie grabbed hold of Logan’s jacket and buried her face in the supple leather.

“Logan, Ah’m so sorry!” Marie sobbed into the jacket. “Ah swear Ah didn’t know.”

In her mind’s eye, Marie pictured Logan. The soft tones of his voice, the way the left corner of his mouth would tilt up in a smirk, the quiet grace of his movements, his unruly dark hair and those ridiculously long sideburns. It was his eyes, though, that had always fascinated her the most. Marie was convinced that she could see all the way into his tortured soul when she looked into his eyes.

“Rogue, can I talk to you for a minute?” Jean called through the closed door.

“Go ‘way!” Marie shouted, clutching the jacket even tighter. “Ah don’t wanna talk to ya!”

Just as she had expected, the door opened anyway and the elegant redhead entered her room. Marie glared at the older woman out of the corner of her eye, holding back the biting comment she could feel building up inside.

“Ah thought Ah said ya couldn’t come in,” Marie growled, sitting up cross-legged in the centre of the bed, Logan’s jacket clutched against her chest.

“I just want to talk to you for a minute, Rogue. You ran out of there before we could explain ourselves,” Jean said as she strode across the room.

“Ya abandoned Logan! What’s there to talk about?” Marie demanded, her angry glare never wavering.

“We didn’t abandon him,” Jean insisted, sitting down next to her. “Every time that we confronted Logan, one of us nearly got skewered on those claws of his. We tried so hard, but eventually had to face the facts. Magneto’s control is too powerful. Logan is lost to us.”

Marie shook her head furiously, her anger seething. “That will never be true. All ya had to do was ask. Ah coulda helped ya. Ah woulda done anythin’ to help Logan. Anythin’! And ya took that away from me! How could ya do that t’ me?”

“This is exactly why we didn’t tell you,” Jean rationalized. “You’re emotions for him are too strong. You would have endangered both him and yourself if you came with us. Just imagine what it would have done to Logan knowing that he had hurt you in some way. It would have destroyed him.”

Marie whimpered, clutching at the coat even tighter. “And ya don’t think that this isn’t doin’ anythin’ to me right now? Logan has been sufferin’ all this time and Ah haven’t been able t’ help him. Ah didn’t even know.”

“We wanted to tell you, Rogue. At some point over the past four years each of us have wanted to tell you, but we all agreed that telling you wouldn’t solve anything. It would only hurt you more in the end knowing that you could do nothing to help him,” Jean explained, fiddling absently with her hair.

“Ya don’t know that,” Marie insisted, “and ya shouldn’t have been the ones to make that decision fer me. The decision shoulda been mine.”

“You’re right, Rogue, it should have been yours and now we are giving you a choice.”

Marie cocked her head to the side, staring intently at the older woman. “What kinda choice?”

“Whether or not you trust us enough to let us help you save Logan.”

“Ah don’t know if Ah can answer that right now,” Marie whispered, brushing her long hair behind his ear.

“You don’t have to,” Jean assured her. “We’ll all still be here in the morning.”

Marie was thankful that Jean left then. At that point she really needed to be alone. She was still so furious with them for not telling her about Logan before she found out about it for herself. Sure she had only been eighteen when Logan had been taken, but she was twenty-two now. There was a lot of time between then and now which they could have told her. But they hadn’t and she resented them for that.

Glancing over at the clock on the nightstand, Marie saw that it was well after two in the morning. Long after the time that she usually went to bed. Logan’s jacket still clutched tightly to her chest, Marie snuggled under the covers and promptly drifted off to sleep.

“Everythin’ will be all right now, Logan,” Marie whispered as she gently ran her bare fingers along his cheek. “Yer back home where ya belong.”

Logan shifted slightly in his sleep, turning towards her. His eyes began to flutter open as he slowly forced his way back into consciousness. Smiling softly, Marie leaned forward and pressed a kiss against his forehead relieved to know that the tender contact wasn’t causing him any pain.

“Marie....”

“Ah’m right here, Logan,” Marie told him, her voice quiet as she smoothed her fingers through his hair.

Logan’s eyes opened a fraction then, just enough so that Marie caught a flash of his gorgeous brown eyes. “You’re really here, Marie?”

“Ah’m here, Logan. Promise.”

Marie woke up from her dream momentarily, wishing for all the world that her dream had been true. That she really had been able to hold Logan. Granted, when they did find Logan, she would be able to hold him and kiss his forehead, but while he was still thousands of miles away, it wasn’t an option. Marie couldn’t wait till she could hold Logan for real.

Little did she know that, as far as Logan was concerned, Marie really had been holding him in her arms. He had felt her caresses and her kisses as though she really had been there.