The Pekes and the Pollicles
Of the aweful battle
Of the Pekes and the Pollicles:
Together with some account
Of the participation
Of the Pugs and the Poms
And the intervention of THE GREAT RUMPUSCAT
.
The Pekes and the Pollicles, everyone knows,
Are proud and implacable passionate foes;
It is always the same, wherever one goes.
And the Pugs and the Poms, although most people say
That they do not like fighting, yet once in a way,
They now and again join into the fray
And they
Bark, bark, bark, bark
Bark, bark, bark, bark
Until you can hear them all over the Park.
.
Now on the occasion of which I shall speak
Almost nothing had happened for nearly a week
(And that's a long time for a Pol or a Peke).
The big Police Dog was away from his beat-
I don't know the reason, but most people think
He'd slipped into the Wellington's Arms for a drink-
And no one at all was about on the street
When a Peke and a Pollicle happened to meet.
They did not advance, or exactly retreat,
But they glared at eachother, and scraped their hind feet,
And they started to
Bark, bark, bark, bark
Bark, bark, bark, bark
Until you can hear them all over the Park
And they
Bark, bark, bark, bark
Bark, bark, bark, bark
Until you can hear them all over the Park
.
Now the Peke, although people may say what they please,
Is no British Dog, but a Heathen Chinese.
And so all the Pekes, when they heard the uproar,
Some came to the window, some came to the door;
There were surely a dozen, more likely a score.
And together they started to grumble and wheeze
In their huffery-snuffery Heathen Chinese.
But a terrible din is what Pollicles like,
For your Pollicle Dog is a dour Yorkshire tyke
.
There are dogs out of every nation
The Irish, the Welsh and the Dane
The Russian, the Dutch, the Dalmatian
And even from China and Spain,
The Poodle, the Pom, the Alsatian
And the mastiff who walks on a chain
And to those that are frisky and frollical
Let my meaning be perfectly plain
That my name it is Little Tom Pollicle
And you'd better not do it again
.
And his braw Scottish cousins are snappers and biters,
And every dog-jack of them notable fighters;
And so they stepped out, with their pipers in order,
Playing When the Blue Bonnets Come Over the Border,
Then the Pug and the Poms held no longer aloof,
But some from the balcony, some from the roof,
Join to the din
With a
Bark, bark, bark, bark
Bark, bark, bark, bark
Until you can hear them all over the Park
Until you can hear them all over the Park
.
When these bold heroes together assembled
The traffic all stopped, and the Underground trembled
And some of the neighbours were so much afraid
That they started to ring up the Fire Brigade.
When suddenly, up from the a small basement flat,
Why who should stalk out but THE GREAT RUMPUSCAT.
His eyes were like fireballs fearfully blazing,
He gave a great yawn, and his jaws were amazing;
And when he looked out through the bars of the area,
You never saw anything fiercer or hairier.
And what with the glare of his eyes and his yawning,
The Pekes and the Pollicles quickly took warning.
He looked at the sky and he gave a great leap-
And they every last one of them scattered like sheep.
.
And when the Police Dog returned to his beat,
There wasn't a single one left in the street.
.
All hail and all power to the Great Rumpus Cat!
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