Chris gave Justin a weak smile. "I know. I wasn't saying that you didn't think. I meant that you didn't think of the right things."
"I'm SORRY," Justin frowned. "Next time I'll pretend to be YOU since you're so much smarter than I am. God, you're such a genius, Chris! I just can't get over it!"
"Stop! What's WRONG with you? I never said or meant ANY of that!"
Justin looked away from Chris and tried to hold his tears back. Chris never did understand how it really was for him. Being alone was hard... especially when you had to watch your best friend go out with your ex-girlfriend.
"Come on, Justin," Chris tried again. "How about we work on trying to figure out who wrote the letter? That might cheer you up."
"I don't WANT to be cheered up."
"We can make fun of JC. That always makes you laugh."
Justin didn't say anything and Chris sighed, leaning back on the bed. He stared at the ceiling and thought about what to try next.
"My name is Mary, by the way... and this is my little sister, Kathy," the older girl told JC after it had been silent for a long time.
JC looked up at them and tried to smile. "Nice to meet you. I'm JC."
Mary looked at him with worry in her eyes. "Are you sure you're okay? You look like you're gonna be sick or something."
JC's eyes met hers. "If I tell you something, can you promise to keep it between us?"
Mary and Kathy nodded.
"I'm not okay," he admitted. "I haven't been okay for a long time."
Mary's heart sank. "Are you sick?"
"No," JC shook his head. "I'm not sick. I'm... just not good enough."
"Not good enough? What do you mean?"
"For everything, for everyone. When things keep getting more and more hectic, I just keep drifting away... and I'm not happy."
"JC, of course you're good enough," Mary told him, taking his hand. "You're you and that's all you can be. If you weren't good enough, don't you think you'd be at a lower place?"
"You don't understand. I'm not talking about being famous. I'm talking about being ME. The problem is that I don't like myself... but I pretend that I do and that just makes me hate my self even more."
Mary didn't know what to say, so she just squeezed his hand. Poor JC had this glamorous life and he just kept digging his hole deeper and deeper to please the world and convince them that he was someone that he wasn't. "I'm sure they'll get us out of here soon," she said when he looked at her for a response.
"Yeah," he mumbled. "And what do I do when I get out?"
Justin and Chris were still staring at the ceiling when there was a knock on the door. Chris looked over at Justin as if to tell him to get the door, but Justin's eyes never left their spot on the ceiling. Chris sighed, rolled off of the bed and went to open the door.
When he opened it, Joey and Lance stood there. "Bad news," Joey said as both he and Lance pushed past Chris and into the room.
Justin pulled his eyes away from the ceiling and looked at them.
"They've canceled the concert for tonight. Apparently the elevator is stuck majorly between floors and until they can get it to move, JC isn't going anywhere."
Chris nodded, and Justin remained silent.
"Boy," Lance said, looking at one and then the other. "You two sure seem happy today," he said sarcastically. "I've never seen you more happy!"
After Lance and Joey had left, the room went back to being silent. It was almost seven when Justin finally spoke.
"It doesn't look like they're going to get him out in time," he said, looking over at Chris, who lay on his be with the page that they'd torn out of JC's notebook. There were tears in his eyes.
"Here," Mary said, reaching into her purse and pulling out a pen and a piece of paper. "I'll give you my number. If you're ever feeling down you can call me and talk to me if you want... if you have time." She wrote down her number and handed it to him.
"Thanks," he sniffed. "I'd like that."
Suddenly, the phone rang and they all jumped. Mary reached for it. "Hello?... oh, really? That's great! Thanks... Yep! Bye."
When she sat back down next to him, JC asked, "What was that all about?"
"They think that they're going to have the elevator up and running soon. We're not supposed to freak out if it moves."
JC gave a sigh of relief. "Thank God... I have to pee REALLY bad. Here's a little advice for future use: never drink coffee and then get stuck on a broken elevator. It's not fun."
Both Mary and Kathy laughed.
"So, where are you two from?" he wondered, changing the subject.
"Carolina," Mary answered. "There's a family reunion tomorrow and we came a day early for a small vacation." She looked around the tiny space and sighed. "Some vacation trapped in here..."
"That's cool though. I'd invite you to our concert, but I don't think that it's going to happen considering that it's already..." he looked down at his watch. "Seven o'clock and we're still on this God forsaken piece of..." he looked over at Kathy, who was smiling him. "Well, you get the picture."
Justin jumped on to the bed next to Chris and gave him a nudge. "You loser, you read it without me."
Chris shoved him back, throwing the paper into Justin's lap. "Go ahead. Read it."
As Justin picked up the paper with both hands, his eyes drifting to the two words on the top line, his face fell and he realized why Chris was acting so depressed.
Even when he had finished reading, he couldn't stop staring at that last verse. "This... this..." he faltered, letting the paper flutter back down to his lap. "This doesn't make me feel any better."
Chris snatched the paper back up and held it away from Justin. "God, Justin... for once this isn't about YOU." With one mean glance, he got up from the bed and put the paper back in his backpack. "Obviously, in case you couldn't GET it, JC is going through HELL. I can't believe that after reading that, your first concern is yourself."
"That's what you think?" Justin queried. "You really think I'm THAT self centered?"
Chris looked at Justin, squinting his eyes. "If the shoe fits," he spat out.
Justin's jaw dropped, but he quickly recovered. "You're wrong, Chris... you don't know how wrong you are."
"Oh really?" Chris said, crossing his arms. "Enlighten me."
"Fine!" Justin moved off the bed and glared across at him. "Do you REALLY want to know?! 'Cause I don't think you could handle it."
Chris turned away, looking over at the chair in the corner of the room. "You've got problems," he muttered, almost afraid to hear what Justin had to say.
"Wrong again. You're the one with all the problems."
Chris spun back around. "YOU'RE my problem!"
"You have NO idea what you're talking about," Justin said before thinking things through completely.
Chris frown melted into a look of confusion. "What do you mean?"
The elevator finally gave one last jerk and the doors flew open JC and the girls jumped up to their feet. To their surprise, most of what they saw was black wires against steel.
"What in the hell?" Mary muttered, looking the wall up and down.
"Look there," JC pointed out, his finger jabbing at the wall, towards the ceiling. "There was a space about a foot wide.
Suddenly, a head popped in. "You're stuck again," the man told them. "We're going to try and pull you out." His eyes fell no Kathy, and then on JC. "Can you lift her up?"
"You've turned everything upside down," Justin said, thinking of the past as he looked away from Chris' stare. His eyes fell to the floor and they filled with tears. He hadn't planned on telling Chris at all... certainly not so soon, but maybe he should. If they couldn't get along anyway, how fun would their 'detective work' be?
"You're insane! It's YOU who's messed things up."
Justin shook his head. Chris wouldn't understand. How could he? "Never mind," he muttered. "I don't even think you'd care."
Chris took a step towards the door and then looked at over his shoulder at Justin. "You're full of shit, Justin. I don't even know what you're talking about," he said before walking out the door and slamming it behind himself.
Once the room was silent, except for the sound of Justin's nervous heart beating, he realized that the hole in which he'd dug himself into was getting deeper and deeper.
What would he think if he found out? "Would he blame me again? I only wanted to get this over with," Justin admitted in a whisper. "I'm sick of all the lies." Finally making up his mind, he rushed towards the door and ventured out into the hallway to finally get rid of the burden that had been resting on his shoulders all day.
The crew had finally lifted JC out of the elevator. Right away, when he saw Mary and Kathy smiling at him, he pulled them both in for a hug. "Thanks for the company," he told them. "I would have gone crazy without you."
Mary kissed his cheek lightly. "No problem... and JC, go to the bathroom. I can tell you're dying."
He nodded and backed away. "Right... thanks and I'll talk to you later. Bye!" and with that, he darted to the rest room. No sooner had he thrown the door open and ran to a stall did he realize that Chris was leaning against the wall in the corner.
"So, elevator man, how are things?" Chris asked in a monotone voice. "Did you have fun trapped in that tiny, little space with absolutely NO way out?"
"Ugh," JC's voice echoed through the bathroom. "Please, don't remind me."
"Well," Chris shrugged, even though JC couldn't see him. "That's my job." As he stood there, staring at the white and green tiles, he thought about telling on Justin. But then... JC would know that they'd READ his notebook and that was NOT something he wanted. Reluctantly, he decided against it.
He looked at his watch when JC emerged and watched him go to the sinks. It was eight o'clock and he was exhausted. However, the thought of going back to his room and facing Justin again made him feel sick. "So, you're okay, right?" he asked as JC dried his hands.
"I'm okay," JC said, looking at Chris through the mirror. "Just did a lot of thinking and... came to a conclusion."
"What's that?"
He walked to the door, Chris not far behind and pushed it open. "I need to change."
"Into what?"
"Not sure. That's as far as I got."
As Chris and JC walked out into the hall, they ran right into Justin. Chris pushed him away while JC stood there, watching the hurt look on Justin's face and observing the scene.
"Stay away from me if you're going to keep putting yourself above others," Chris almost shouted at Justin and then turned to JC. "I'm REALLY sorry," and then he walked back to his room.
JC looked over at Justin. "What was that all about?"
Justin was desperate to get away from JC... away from everyone. If Chris were going to treat him like dirt, then he didn't deserve to know the truth anyway. He took a deep breath and put on a strong expression for JC. "I don't know," he said, shrugging. "But I think I'm going to head down to the restaurant... and no, I won't take the elevator," he smirked.
"Ha, ha," JC said sarcastically, narrowing his eyes. "You wouldn't be making jokes if that had been YOU stuck in that elevator."
"True," Justin agreed as he pretended to think about it. "But, oh, wait... it WASN'T me. It was YOU!"
JC glared at him. "You're such an idiot," he said before turning around and walking away.
"Oh, yeah," Justin called after him. "Good comeback."
When JC didn't turn around, didn't stop, look back over his shoulder, or even slow down, Justin sighed.
"That was really mean," he mumbled to himself before heading off to the stairwell.
'Yeah, it was,' his conscience agreed with him for a change. 'You should go and apologize.'
JC opened the door to his room and went right to his bed. Not only was he exhausted and wanted to lie down, but he was also dying to get to his notebook and write a a new song. This song was going to be even better than the last one. He could feel it.
When he reached under his pillow, pulled out his blue notebook and looked for the old song, he couldn't find it. He could have sworn it was the second to last entry, but apparently, that wasn't the case, so he flipped though every page, searching
It wasn't there.
His head spun as he looked through the pages again. How could this be? He hadn't let anyone in his ro-
He slammed the notebook shut and felt his face turn a shade between red and bright pink.
Justin. Justin had been in his room... left alone in it, even. In fact, it was JUSTIN'S fault that he went down to get that latte... it was JUSTIN'S fault that he was riding back up in the elevator... EVERYTHING was Justin's fault!
His privacy had been violated and he thought that if he looked in the mirror, he'd see the words 'sad' and 'lonely' written all over his face in black, permanent marker.
"You're miserable, JC," he said to himself. "And now the whole world might as well know it."
Chris sat in front of the window and looked out at the parking lot. The bus sat there, right next to the building. On the other end of the lot, he could see three of the other busses. The middle had a few cars, but that was it. It was dark by now. Dark, chilly and depressing... and all Chris could think about was JC's song... and Gracie. JC wasn't the ONLY one who was lonely, that was for sure.
TO Chris, it seemed as if loneliness and deceit were the only things he could count on anymore and that sure as hell didn't promise him a happy future. Just thinking of that tiny life growing within Gracie, brought tears to his eyes. How would he live with everything? At least he had time to figure things out.
Suddenly, he stood up, pushing the chair away from the window and back to the corner of the room. He had to do something. Everything with Gracie had left an open wound in his heart, which hadn't healed, so he decided to work on JC.
Chris was standing in the middle of the room with his eyes stuck on his gray backpack when the idea hit him like no other idea had hit him before.
He practically dove at his backpack to retrieve the sheet of notebook paper. 'Who cares if it were JC who wrote the letter,' he thought, reading over the lyrics again. 'This song is MUCH bigger.'
He reached back into the backpack and pulled out his address book. He knew that JC would never want to use this song on an album, but it was too good to just let it sit there in his notebook forever. Besides, once he heard music to the words, Chris was absolutely positive he'd change his mind. What could it hurt?
He flipped open the address book to the Ws. They wouldn't have to use it if JC still said no when it came time to pick songs for the album.
"Warren..." Chris muttered, running his finger down the list of names, phone numbers and addresses. "Diane. Here we go."
Chapter 5
Identities
Chris {Fiction}
Justin {Fiction}
My Fiction
I'll Never Stop {Fiction}
Email me: irishgirl982@yahoo.com