When Nick got home, it was almost dark. The stars were fading away behind the incoming clouds and the sky was becoming a dark, depressing gray. 'Not that it matters what color the sky is,' he thought while he turned the key. 'If it were bright green, I'd still feel the same.'
Once inside his little home out in the middle of nowhere, he dropped his skates and listened as they hit the wood paneling. Across the room he spotted a red, blinking light and a small smile almost found its way to his lips. He had a message.
His coat and keys were next to join the hockey skates on the floor as he made his way to the light, curious as to who's voice he was about to hear.
Blink, blink, blink, pause, blink, blink, blink.
Three messages. He smiled, lowering his finger to the red glow.
Click, beep.
"Hi, Nick, it's mom. I was just calling to see how things are going out there. I still don't understand why you feel like you have to be away from your family on your vacations... Anyway, just give me a call when you get a chance, honey. 'Bye."
Beep, click, beep.
"Nick! Where have you been?! Did you turn off our cell or something? There's a photo shoot scheduled for February tenth, so you guys are going to have to cut of your vacation a few days early. Give me a call so I know that you got this message."
Nick rolled his eyes. "Managers..." he muttered.
Beep, click, beep.
"Hey, Nick. I thought you left the rink, but you're still not home? Where'd you go? Anyway, I wanted to tell you that that girl at the rink... she's great. She made it clear to me that she's interested in someone else... some hockey player. His name started with a J, I think. James, John, something like that. She'd be really great to hang out with. Her name's Noelle and I got her number-"
Beep. Nick turned it off. The last thing he wanted to hear was Brian gushing over some girl. Besides... he saw her first anyway.
It wasn't the fact that he didn't have a girlfriend... well, maybe it was to a certain extent it was, but the real reason he felt so alone was because he didn't care anymore. he didn't care about himself the way he used to. People in his life came and went and it had gotten to the point where they didn't seem real. Even his perspective of the people closest to him had changed in the past year.
The messages that rang through his ears, every time it was silent, were more clear than his vision.
Don't trust anyone, they'll just hurt you in the long-run.
Who cares what people think about you? They're the ones who're out to get you anyway.
And so he put up walls around his entire being and every once in a while, when he sat still, he could feel those walls getting thicker and stronger and deep down, he knew that they were getting harder and harder to break down... not that he WANTED that to happy or anything...
He sighed, but didn't erase the messages on his answering machine. He didn't return the calls either. Instead, he padded away from the dismal mood that had been created in his living room and went down to the basement to watch television. He needed something to make his brain stop thinking so hard.
The next morning was so white and... looked so cold, that Nick had to squint his eyes until they adjusted to the nearly blinding brightness of it all. Outside his window, there was a thin layer of fresh, sparking snow, resting lightly on every branch he could see and he couldn't help but think about nothing else but the whiteness.
The shrill of the phone reminded him that he had more to do today than just sit and look aimlessly out the window. He raked his fingers through the mess of tangled sheets and blankets on his bed until he came up with the cordless. He fumbled with it for a moment and then found the on button.
"Hello?"
"Nick! Why didn't you call me back?" Brain's voice rang through the phone.
Nick rubbed his eyes. "What time is it?" he yawned.
"It's almost eleven. Were you sleeping? How late were you up?"
"Yes... I don't know! Brian, I just got up! I can hardly think straight and-"
"So, do you want to come skating with Noelle and me?" Brain interrupted and then waited hopefully for Nick's response.
Nick leaned back against his pillows. Obviously he had stopped playing Brian's message before the important part. Whoops. "Um... when?"
"Did you even GET my message?"
"Sorry, Brian, I was tired. So you and Noelle are going skating again today? When? Where?"
"After Lunch. We're eating at this little deli her aunt and uncle own. Then we're going skating on that outdoor rink over by your end of town. You coming?"
"Well, was I invited? I hardly know her."
"I'm inviting you right now, dumbass. Besides, she said she wanted you to come for some reason or another. Maybe she's insane. She MUST be if she likes YOU."
"Me? I thought she liked that hockey player from her school."
"Yeah, well, I didn't mean like THAT. I meant that she wants to be FRIENDS with you. Settle down..."
Chapter 4
The Loneliness Inside
Non-Nsync Fiction
I'll Never Stop {Fiction}
Email me: irishgirl982@yahoo.com