An outdoor rink. A big one with a few skaters sprinkled across the surface of the ice. Brian had said that he hoped it was smooth so that no one would trip... especially someone who couldn't skate very well...
Nick pulled his laces tight. Next to him, Noelle sat with her skates already on. She couldn't believe how slow moving he was being. She was amazed by how he could be happy and joking around one minute and then sad and quiet the next.
Brian was off getting his skates sharpened, saying that they were too dull and Nick was happy about that, but then again, now that Brian wasn't there to keep the conversation going, it was far too quiet.
They were the only ones in the warming house and the only things that he could hear were the humming of the heater and the soft brushing of his laces being pulled taut through the metal rings in his skates.
He hadn't a clue of what to say.
The second he pulled the bow tight on his left skate, Noelle hopped up. "C'mon, you hockey player. Let's get skating." She grabbed his sleeve and led him towards the door.
"But... but shouldn't we wait for Brain?" he stammered as he struggled to walk with his skates on the padded floor.
"He'll find us. Don't worry," she assured him. "I'm going to teach you a few things so you'll be able to skate better. You said that you once knew how to skate, right?"
"Yeah, but..." She wasn't listening to him. Once his blades hit the ice, he grabbed her arm, letting her pull him along. She started picking up the pace and he began to wonder if she was just going to push him out there at full speed. "Noelle, don't go so fast!"
She just laughed before slowing down.
"That's not funny!" he frowned. "I need to take this slow."
"Okay, okay." She skidded to a stop and then took both of his hands. "Just push off a little to the side with one of your feet. It'll be easy once you get the hang of it again."
They went around once; Noelle skating backwards as she slowly picked up the speed. "See?" she said when she noticed that it was getting easier for him. "I knew you could do it."
"Yeah," he smiled at her. "This is really working." He stared down at his feet as he went along. Push left. Push right. 'Just because you keep yourself busy doesn't mean that it'll go away and just because you notice it less, doesn't mean that it's not there.' Left. Right. Left... He stopped when they came to back to the front of the rink because he saw Brian standing there, obviously waiting for them.
"Looking a little better," Brain told Nick. "Seriously." He pushed out on the ice and did a slow lap around them.
Noelle let go of Nick's hands.
He knew it. The second Brian stepped out on that ice, he was forgotten. Who cares about the guy who can't keep up? If he looks sad, just ignore him. "You know what? I'm not really feeling well and I think I'd be better off if I just went home," he said, not even waiting to see what they'd do first.
Noelle saw the look on his face as he made his way to the warming house. She grabbed his arm. "Are you okay?"
Before he could spit out his usual answer, Brain spoke up, "How are you going to get home? I drove, remember?"
He said the first thing that came to mind, "I'll walk." Who cares how he got home? As long as he got away from them, he didn't see what the problem was. "I'll take the bus. Whatever."
Noelle wouldn't let go of his arm. "Come on, Nick, don't leave. You'll have fun. I promise."
"I..." he looked at her. "I'm really sorry, but I just don't feel well." He slightly pulled away from her and she reluctantly let go.
They watched him walk towards the warming house. Once he was out of earshot, she nudged Brian. "You should drive him home. He's sick."
Brain shook his head. "He's not sick. He's been acting like this for a while now... and trust me, he's fine."
"Then why doesn't he look fine?"
"I don't know what's wrong with him. Every day he seems to be becoming a different person. I'm starting to get worried."
"Come on, Brian. Let's drive him home. He can't walk all that way."
"It's only a few blocks. This is a pretty small town. He'll be fine."
Noelle watched the door close with a bang and then he was gone. What was wrong with Nick? Was he really sick or was it something else... and why did she have the feeling that he wasn't going to be okay?
Once he had his skates off and slung over his shoulder, he finally worked up the courage to peer out the window. There, he saw Noelle and Brian skating around with smiles on their faces. He could tell that they didn't care that he was gone. It didn't matter to them. Just one less person to put up with.
With a sigh, he walked out of the door and down the sidewalk. It was getting colder. He could tell by the way his ears were becoming numb. He put his hands over them to warm them up and then continued on his way.
Why was everything in his life so difficult? Why did his mind have to turn everything around and point fingers at himself? Why did everything seem like it was his fault?
And... what was the solution?
Chapter 7
The Loneliness Inside
Non-Nsync Fiction
I'll Never Stop {Fiction}
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