The silver watch on his wrist said two forty-eight and seventeen seconds. Nick stared over at his answering machine with a slight glare. It was blinking again and instead of wanting to talk to... well, anyone, he didn't even make a move to listen to his messages. Who cared what people had to say anyway? They weren't going to help him... he knew that much.
The phone was his link to the world right then and without it in his hand, he felt lost. Even though he wasn't going to call anyone, he just felt better knowing that he could if he wanted to. He must have jumped a foot when it rang in his hand. The green light blinked rapidly as it rang and Nick bit his lip, deciding on whether or not to answer it. Oh God, how he wished he had invested in caller ID right about then.
He took a chance, pressed the on button and put the phone to his ear. "Hello?" he hadn't meant for his voice to come out that shaky.
"Nick? Is that you?" he heard a female voice come through the phone.
"Yeah... who's this?"
"It's Noelle. I just wanted to make sure you were okay. You left so quickly and we were worried about you. Brian would have called but he was afraid you were mad at him for some reason. Everything's okay, right?"
"Everything's fine." Another lie. "Thanks for calling."
"Hey, Nick, I've got an idea. Why don't I rent a few movies tonight, come over to your place and then we can just hang out. What do you say?"
The truth? He didn't know what to say. Had Brian put her up to this? "Um... movies?" he said questionably.
"Sure. How about I bring the movies and you make the popcorn?"
That got a smile out of him. "Deal," he answered.
Three hours later, Nick opened the door to see Noelle standing there with a movie in each hand. She stepped inside.
"We've got silly, adventure type movie," she said, handing him 'Goonies,' "and we've got scared out of your pants type movie. You pick." She stacked 'Scream 3' on top of Goonies and shut the door behind herself. "How's that popcorn coming along?"
"Popcorn?" All the excitement of having a guest had flustered him. "Oh! Yeah... sorry. I'll put it in right away."
"No hurry."
"We can go downstairs in a second," he told her as she followed him into the kitchen. "Right after I make the popcorn." He reached inside a cabinet and pulled out a box of popcorn.
"Gee, Nick, I don't know... you're slacking an awful lot," she teased. "When I got here I was expecting the popcorn made and ready to be eaten!"
He looked up from the plastic wrapping and stared at her.
"I was kidding," she assured him.
Nick smiled. "I know." He opened the microwave door and shoved the popcorn bag inside before shutting it and pressing a few buttons. "Is movie theater popcorn okay with you?" he asked, giving her a wicked grin.
"I wouldn't expect any less!"
After the popcorn was out of the microwave and into one big bowl, Nick and Noelle grabbed a few Cokes and then traveled down to the basement. A tape was popped into the VCR and they both plopped down on the big couch with the popcorn bowl between the two of them.
As the previews played, Noelle looked over at Nick. "So are you sure you're okay? You're not mad at Brian, are you?"
"I'm not mad at Brian. He didn't do anything wrong."
"Did I do anything wrong?"
He looked at her. "No! Of course not."
She pulled her legs up under herself and looked at him with worry. "Then what's wrong?"
"Nothing." Nick put a few pieces of popcorn in his mouth and chewed.
"I don't know you very well, Nick, but I get the distinct feeling that you're lying to me."
Nick almost choked. My God, was she blunt! He grabbed his Coke and took a big drink. "Why would I lie to you?"
"Why have you been lying this whole time?" she countered.
"This whole time? About what?"
"Every time someone asks you if you're okay... or how you're doing, you always say you're fine, but, Nick, I can see in your eyes that you're not."
He quickly looked away from her and stared at the television screen. How could someone he met yesterday read him so well?
"And that," she continued. "Every time I figure out something about you, you back away. Why is that? Why don't you want anyone to know you?"
"It's not that I don't want anyone to know me. That's not it all," he revealed, his hand backing away from the popcorn bowl.
"Then what is it?"
He looked back at her and gave her a weak smile. The previews were ending. "Can't we just watch the movie?" he asked quietly.
"I'm just trying to help, Nick," Noelle gave in as she reached for a handful of popcorn. "We'll watch the movie, but can we talk about this later?"
He nodded. How could he tell her that it wasn't letting someone in that was the problem... it was what someone could do after they got inside of him.
Chapter 8
The Loneliness Inside
Non-Nsync Fiction
I'll Never Stop {Fiction}
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