"Yeah, I think he looks like her. You don't?"
"Sorta," Chris frowned. "But there's just something about that little boy. Maybe he looks more like his father. I've never met him." He paused, turning to see JC's face. "Have you?"
JC turned pale as memories of Ben Charleston invaded his thoughts. But then he remembered that losing Hazel was his own fault and that made him even more sick to his stomach. How he had hurt her the day he told her he was leaving. Not only did he break her heart, but he took it with himself, leaving his with her. Now he felt as if she cast his heart aside, not even caring while he still clung desperately to hers, even though it didn't rightfully belong to him.
JC pulled his hand to his chest, staring at the wall. There was no doubt about it... he still loved her. He had never STOPPED loving her. How could he have thrown everything away like he did? How stupid could he have been? Extremely.
But now it was too late. He was too distant to even begin to think about getting her back. For heaven's sake, she was married and her and her husband had a CHILD together. There was no way he could come between that.
Hazel closed Benny's door and leaned against it as she stared out into the hallway. Josh was in her living room and she thanked God that Ben was away... he wouldn't have liked it. And when she saw Josh look at Benny, she didn't see anything in his eyes that revealed that he was upset. After all, Benny was Ben's son and she knew how Josh never liked him.
Carefully, she stepped away from the door and walked toward the living room... and that's when she heard Josh and his friend talking. She knew it was wrong to eavesdrop, but she just couldn't help herself.
"Jaaaayceeeeeee," Chris said in a drawn-out voice. "Hello? Are you in there?"
There were a few seconds before Josh responded. "Yeah... sorry, I was just thinking..."
"Must I ask?"
"We'll talk about this later, Chris. Now drop it."
Hazel walked out, holding a piece of paper out to Josh. "I wrote down my number for you so we can keep in touch. It's been really different without you here."
JC looked up at her as he took the paper, their hands brushing, and in his mind, he made a note that it was the first time they had touched in four years. For him, the electricity was still there. "It's been different not being here. Hazel, my whole life has changed."
Chris took that as his cue to exit. "Um... I'll just go sit on the steps for a while," he muttered, neither JC or Hazel noticing.
She sat down next to JC and looked at him. "I know things have changed, but JC, we used to be... really close. You know that I didn't want you to go away."
"I know," he replied. "And I wanted to stay, but... you've gotta understand. I had to follow my dreams."
"You let me know it... that your dreams were more important than me."
"That wasn't it, Hazel, I-"
"You can't have everything, Josh."
JC looked down at the carpet. "I know I can't. We've already had this conversation. You know that I can't give you an explanation. The opportunity came and I just had to go and that's all there was to it."
"But that's NOT all there was to it. It didn't involve just you. I was there too and you threw me out like I didn't mean anything to you... but I did. Didn't I, Josh?"
He looked back up at her, feeling the urge to pull her into his arms just like old times. But he didn't. He couldn't. It wouldn't be right. "You know you did." He wanted to tell her that she still did mean something to him... that she always would, but again, it wasn't his place anymore to say things like that. "Let's drop this. There's nothing else I can say."
She didn't say anything. All she did was look back into his eyes.
"I'm really sorry I hurt you, Hazel, but I really want to make it up. Can we be friends again?" he asked, praying that she'd agree with him.
Hazel could see the hopefulness in his eyes and she wanted to say yes more than anything, but there was something in her telling her that it would turn her world upside down if she did. "I don't know, Josh. Would it work?"
"I'm not saying that we have to be best friends and be together all the time. I'd just like to talk to you every now and then to see how you're doing. Would it be too much if I called you and we could talk once in a while?"
"No," she agreed. "It wouldn't be too much... but, Josh, you've got to understand that I'm married. What's Ben gonna think when I keep getting calls from you?"
Chapter 4 (not ready)
What Might Have Been
JC {Fiction}
My Fiction
I'll Never Stop {Fiction}
Email me: irishgirl982@yahoo.com