All poetry on this page copywrighted by Sheila Long
When a trust is betrayed
and a line has been crossed
you begin to realize that all may be lost
The tears start to fall
and your dreams, they all die
and then you begin to start wondering why
Why did this happen
What made him change
It seems your whole life has been re-arranged
Should you try to start over
Try to make it all new
Those thoughts can be scary but what else can you do
Remember the good times
and try your best to forgive
because without him you can't imagine how you would
live
To forget about him
and the dreams that you've shared
would be very hard because you still care
You listen to others
as ask them their views
but, in the end, the final decision is left up to you
When you look at me
you can not see
that I'm a Mommy
There is no baby
in my arms
no child
tugging on my shirt
Unless you know me
or look into my eyes
and see my broken heart
you do not know
that I'm a Mommy
What you do see is deceiving
because I am a Mommy
There are babies
who I hold in my heart
and who tug at my soul
My babies live in Heaven
they were taken from me
much too soon
Just because you can not see my babies
doesn't mean I'm not a Mommy
Because I am, and always will be a Mommy
in the truest sense of the word
For my angels DJ, Emma, Amelia, Jaden, Ryleigh, &
Avery,
6 of Heaven's brightest stars...
Shine on little star
Way up in the sky
I see you shining brightly
and a tear comes to my eye
Your soft glow brings me comfort
and guides me through the night
Your presence in the night sky
Will shine 'til morning light
For my beautiful little girl, Amelia Grace,
born sleeping 1/15/99
Our precious Amelia
Our sweet little angel
You were here only a moment
But you have touched our lives forever
Why you couldn't stay with us
We may never know the reason
We only know the heartbreak of
having another angel in Heaven
We will forever love you
and keep you close in our hearts
Thank you, sweet angel
For blessing our lives with your presence
I am lost
I am alone
My mind is numb
My heart aches
How do I begin
to pick up the pieces
of my shattered life
Where do I start
in my quest to
put the scattered puzzle back together
It is not easy
but one by one
I will grab the pieces
and find their place
No matter how hard I try
some will not fit
where they once belonged
They will never fit
together in the same way again
Many pieces now have ragged,
torn edges
while others are now gone,
lost forever
The struggle seems endless
the quest seems useless
Will the puzzle ever be
beautiful again
Why do I continue to fight
Why do I keep trying to fit
Piece after piece
Maybe because deep down inside
I still have some hope
That one day
Some of the pieces will once again fit
One day
My life may be whole again
The puzzle will take shape
and the picture it shows
will be beautiful and complete
Somewhere out there is the child who will stay
I'll hold them safe in my arms
and will never have to let go
I will love them with my entire heart
Somewhere out there is the family who will accept me
They are loving, they will look beyond my faults
They will support me through everything
Somewhere out there are the friends who will
understand me
They are caring and will always lift me up when I fall
They will stand beside me through the bad and the good
Somewhere out there is the career that will fulfill me
It is satisfying, challenging, and I'll enjoy going to
work
It will allow me to feel useful, needed
Somewhere out there is the life I've been searching
for
I'll have a faithful, devoted man; a beautiful,
healthy child;
a loving, supportive family; friends who are caring,
helpful;
a career that is fulfilling, satisfying
I feel like I've been searching forever
Always wondering where I fit in, where I belong
I want to be happy and fulfilled,
I want the searching to end
Someday I know the searching will end
It has to, I can't go on like this much longer
Please, please let my someday be soon
When I see a beautiful butterfly
I see you in it's fluttering wings
When I feel a soft breeze across my face
I feel you in it's warm touch
When I see the morning dew on the grass
I see you in the sunlight sparkling upon it
When I hear the soft whisper of a friend
I hear you in their words, saying "Mommy, I love you"
When I touch the soft petals of a flower
I touch your skin gently and feel you in my arms
I know you're here, sweet Ry
You're everywhere...you're all around me
Thank you, sweet Ry
For making your presence known to me
and for making my world more beautiful
Hello...Goodbye
Hello
Hello, my little one
A faint line has just revealed your existence
I knew in my heart that you were with me
But I couldn't bring myself to acknowledge that til
now
Your existence brings me
joy...surprise...fear...confusion
As much as I try not to, I feel myself falling in love
This isn't the right time, this shouldn't have
happened
But it is, and it has...you are reality
Your presence is sinking in
The plans, hopes, dreams are spinning through my head
Goodbye, my little one
A simple test has shown that you're no longer with me
Has my resistance to your existence caused you to
leave?
No matter what I've thought, felt...I've loved you.
The ceasing of your existence has broken my heart
Deep down inside I'm aching and wishing this wasn't
true
I must soon say a final goodbye
I wish that time wouldn't come so quickly
I love you, my little one
Always have, always will...always
Goodbye
Missing you and wondering...
will my heart make room for your little sister,
without forgetting you or crowding you out?
Will I take time to stop and focus on you,
once she is here with a firm grip on my time and my heart?
Will there be enough tears of missing you to shed,
once I've cried so many tears of happiness because she's here?
Will I have time to spend solely with you on your special days?...
moments to relive and remember, time to lay flowers on your grave.
Will my memories of you remain as strong and as clear?
Losing the pictures of you that I keep in my heart is unfathomable.
As I face gaining so much by welcoming your little sister into my life,
I fear losing so much more...
my precious memories & the private moments that I set aside solely for you.
