My Dearest Son, Zavad....
I know you're too young to read yet but one day you'll read this for yourself and know how much I love you. Since the day I found out I was pregnant with you, you have captivated my heart and soul. From the moment they layed you in my arms after your birth, I have thought about nothing else but providing you with all I have to give.
I watch you grow from day to day....discovering, learning, experiencing life and I often wonder what you think and dream about our world and your life in general. As you go through your life, I realize that I too have another chance at childhood, a chance to see things again for the first time and be amazed by the beauty, bigness and wonder of it all.
You have changed my life in so many ways. I can hardly remember my life before the wonder of you. I look at you and realize that God has given me something so very special and precious. More than a son, my true soul mate.
As we lay in bed at night with each other, I watch you as you sleep and I pray to God, I pray for your life and well being. And I pray to God, Thanking Him Everyday for giving you to me.
I still look at you, even though you're 5 years old now and think of how special and beautiful you are. The kind of joy that fills up your soul and can only be expressed through tears of happiness. The love I feel amazes even me.
I pray for your future even though at times I'm confused about it myself. I hope you turn out better than me and I try everyday to make that possible.
As your mother, no one will ever love you as much as I do. I am your biggest fan and your best friend. In me you can always rely. No song has ever been written, no poem ever penned, nor no thought ever imagined could ever express the love I feel for you. I feel you in everything I do, in every thought I have and with every fiber of my being.
I love you more than you will ever know. I will sacrifice anything I have for your happiness and will die or kill for your safety, well being, and protection no matter the cost to my own life and existance in this world. And will never regret a single moment of the punishment I may face in this life or the one that follows death.
You are my life and through you I will live forever. My teachings will go on to your children and my love will be remembered even when I am gone.
( Wrote 12/02 )
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