Zac, Ike and I were all just kinda laying around our hotel relaxing before our Press Conference and concert that night in Washington DC. “Hey guys, do you miss them?” I asked. Zac looked up at me.
“I never DIDN’T miss them.”
“Me either, why?” Ike asked also looking at me.
“I don’t know really. I just miss her a lot now.” I said softly, now feeling somewhat stupid for what I had just said. Zac busted out laughing the instant I ended my sentence. I looked over at him, hurt. “What?”
He continued to laugh but was able to catch his breath. “It’s just…God Tay you’re pathetic.” He laughed some more. “I mean, you wouldn’t believe how pathetic you just sounded.”
“Oh shut up.” I snapped with a half smile playing on my lips as I whipped my pillow at his face. It hit in square in the side of the head but when he went to throw it back he missed and whacked Ike. Ike, not paying attention, actually fell over.
He sat up and looked at both of us. Zac and I shared a look that echoed “oops”. “Oh you are both so dead!” Ike laughed as he got up with two pillows ready to take both of us on. Zac and I quickly shared mischievous glances, got up and attacked him with our pillows. He was quickly taken down by our relentless beating but that didn’t stop me and Zac we continued to laugh heartily as we hit him repeatedly. Isaac curled in a ball trying to protect his face and that just made me and Zac laugh harder. Finally we just had to take a break we could hardly breathe. Isaac, of course used this to his advantage and started tickling me to the death. Now, not many people know but I am deathly ticklish. Thank God he couldn’t hold Zac, he got up on the couch and yelled “COWABUNGA!!” at the top of his lungs before he leapt off the couch and onto Isaac. He knocked Ike off of me and I scooted away trying to catch my breath, I saw Ike and Zac doing the same thing.
“Guys, that was absolutely…” Ike started.
“Insane?” I finished with a grin.
“Yep.” Zac said, “This is great.” I smiled in return. It was great. I missed that with my brothers. And we all know that had the girls been there, that would not have taken place. Granted I still missed Amy Lee more than anything. But, we were going to be fine.
~My P.O.V.~
We’d been at our cabin for almost two weeks and I loved it. The lakes and mountains were absolutely beautiful and Care, Beth, and I hadn’t been this close since before we met the guys. “Did you know that in eleven days it’ll be our ONE YEAR anniversary with the guys?” I asked from sitting between Beth and Care on the couch.
“God, I know, isn’t it outrageous?” Care asked. I nodded and smiled.
“So much has happened.” Beth said, obviously forgetting that the wound of me and Zac was still fresh in mine and Care’s hearts. But when she noticed the solemn looks on our faces and the tears welling up in my eyes she remembered. “Oh God, I’m so sorry.” She said quietly. The tears spilt over and I got up and ran out of the living room, out the front door, down the yard and out to the end of the dock. I don’t know why it hit me so hard. It must have been those damned hormones. But no matter how hard I tried I couldn’t stop crying.
~Care’s P.O.V.~
As Amy ran out I just looked at Beth. I knew I shouldn’t follow Amy so I didn’t. I just went upstairs to my room and went out on my balcony. Beth sat down next to me shortly after. “I’m so sorry. I completely forgot.” She said sincerely, concern in her eyes.
I took her hand. ‘It’s ok. It’s just the fact that we didn’t. I just don’t understand why she freaked out so bad.”
“Care, hun, she’s pregnant. She can’t exactly control her emotions.” She said.
“Yeah, so I’ve noticed.” I laughed slightly. Beth then left to go check on Amy.
~My P.O.V.~
Shortly after my tears finally subsided I heard footsteps on the dock. I turned and saw my beloved Bethany coming towards me. I smiled slightly. “Hey hun.” She said as she sat down next to me.
“Hi.”
“Are you ok?” She asked softly.
“I’m not sure.” I laughed slightly to lighten the mood. Then it was silent for a minute. Beth looking at me with concern growing in her eyes. “I just have no clue why I reacted that way.”
A soft smile grew across her lips. “Two words hun, you’re pregnant.”
“I know that!” I snapped. Then I closed my eyes and sighed. “I just hate feeling so out of control.”
Once again she smiled. “We’ll deal with it.”
“How’s Care?” I asked looking up towards the house. Realizing my running out must have been pretty weird.
“She’s a little worried. She realizes it’s mostly your hormones. But I think we should talk about it.”
I nodded as she got up then helped me up, which was harder than it used to be. “God I’m getting fat!” I laughed.
“Heavier, but not fat. That’s just your baby in there.” She comforted.
“I just feel..”
“Don’t feel anything.” She interrupted. “You’re still beautiful and always will be. No matter how ‘pregnant’ you get.” She laughed. I joined her as we walked back up to the cabin.
~Care’s P.O.V.~
I looked away from that fireplace to the large picture window and saw Amy and Beth. Amy was smiling a bit and it just…It was hard to understand how she can change moods so quickly. “Care, I’m so sorry I ran out like that.” Amy apologized as soon as she was through the door.
“Amy, it’s ok.” I said sitting down on the couch. “I understand.” Though I really didn’t.
“I think we should still talk about it.” Of course Beth…
“Yeah, cuz y’know I didn’t just run off just because of the Zac thing.” Amy said as she sat down next to me. And THAT just confused me even more. And I think Beth as well.
“What?” We both asked. Amy sighed.
“Well when you said we’ve been through so much I didn’t just think of me and Zac. There was Zac’s suicide attempt, Ricky, Joe, leaving my family in MN, getting engaged, losing my virginity, taking Tay’s…” She swallowed thickly. “And Zac’s…New Year’s—Sarah….my discovery of being pregnant AND my depression.” Beth and I thought in silence. “Do you understand more now?” She asked quietly, obviously worried that we didn’t.
It took me awhile to answer, I was still thinking. “Yeah…we’ve DEFINITELY been through a lot.”
“No wonder you got so upset hun.” Beth said sympathetically to Amy.
“But they must really love us to stay with us through all of that.” I said looking deeply into the fire in front of the couch.
“No doubt. Any other relationship, with any other guy would have been over a LONG time ago.” Amy said with a tinge of resentment to those other guys.
“Yeah, just look at you and Ricky.” Beth said with a little laugh. But for some reason I knew Amy wouldn’t take it that well and all was quiet. I knew by the look in her eyes that she was thinking about Ricky.
~My P.O.V.~
Ricky….he loved me so much. Where’d it go wrong? I lost myself in my thought, not noticing the concern Beth and Care shared at the moment.
“Amy, PLEASE tell us what you’re thinking.” Beth begged. But I couldn’t. I just continued to think.
It was over before Tay came along. But would we have gotten back together if he hadn’t? Would I have been as happy?….No I couldn’t be happier when it came to my relationship with Tay. Did Tay love me as much as Ricky did? Maybe does? No! Amy! That’s a horrible thing to think. No one could ever love you as much or more than Taylor does. And always will. I returned to reality to find my best friends almost crying out of concern. I felt so bad for scaring them. I hugged them tight. “Don’t worry, I’m ok.”
“What the hell were you thinking in there?!” Beth almost demanded. I didn’t answer.
“It was Ricky wasn’t it?” Care asked gently. She always knew everything when it came to me. And the majority of the time I loved her for it. Like now.
I nodded and said. “I was comparing him and Tay. And what would have happened if we hadn’t met the guys.”
“Oh…Sweetie. Don’t do that.” Care said while hugging me.
“I couldn’t help it.” I said as I relayed my whole thinking on it.
“No one could EVER love you as much as Taylor does…not even close.” Beth said.
“Not even—“
“No, not even Ricky. Even before you met Tay, Ricky was never even close.” Care interrupted. I smiled and we sat there in silence as we watched the fire die. Life was good. Even with all these damn mood swings.