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                    __ _ / _|_ __ ___
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                   Another Foggy Moment

 These are the continuing adventures of a typical resident
 of the self-proclaimed center of the Pugetopolis universe -
 Seattle. Most are true stories but some are made of whole-
 cloth. I ain't the Mayor, the Governor or a Big Shot. Just
 another Working Stiff with a Bad Attitude.

    ---------------------------------------------------
    WARNING: This is not a Child-Proof Neighborhood. If 
    you're a kid - scram!, beat it! you little punk before 
    your Old Lady catches you and calls the cops. They'll 
    throw you in the Big House in Walla Walla and won't 
    let you out until you're 89 years old. There. Don't  
    say I didn't warn you.
    -------------------------------------------------

                          - 128 -

 Thursday (the 10th) will be the 97th anniversary of the first
 night the street lights came on in Seattle. It was on that
 date in 1905 that Cedar Falls threw the switch. Only three 
 more years to the centennial eh. I recall once riding into 
 town with a Scottish friend one night when we got to the street 
 lights. He started squirming in his seat and acting funny. I 
 asked him what the matter was. He was upset I hadn't turned 
 off my car lights now that we were in the city. No wonder the 
 Scotch have such a reputation for being cheap! The tight-arsed 
 buggers even turn off their car lights in the city. Though, 
 come to think of it, the lights don't do a helluva lot of 
 good beyond blinding one another with our brights, do they.
       
                            *

 It's become something of a tradition for me to head down to
 Uwajimaya's in Chinatown on News Years Eve to grab a few of
 their free year-at-a-glance calendar posters. They always
 come in handy. One goes up next to my desk at home while the
 rest are taped up wherever I work during the year. Everybody
 likes them. On return trips I always find them still up and
 full of little annotations. Calendars used to be a common 
 New Year item from stores and insurance agents but not any 
 more. The practice has died out. Uwajimaya was one of the 
 last of the hold-outs. Used to be anyways. I didn't find any
 calendars this year. 

 It is the year of the horse you know. Ever since discovering 
 this fact I have been filled with great optomism. Anything 
 that's got horses in it can't be all bad. It might turn out 
 to be a good year afterall.

                              *

 President Yellowbelly's Boyz have whittled the WTC towers dead 
 down to less than 3,000 now as he continues to try to weasel 
 out of his compensation promise to the surviving families. 
 Cheap bastard. Screwing them over REAL good. And the many 
 single people who had no one to immediately miss them, plus 
 the homeless, all fall between the cracks. Our News Nazis 
 can be relied upon to keep any legal challenges out of the 
 Public Eye so they don't disrupt the patriotic ambiance 
 they've worked so hard to create. You may recall there were 
 originally thought to be 50,000 people inside those towers 
 that morning. Ain't no way in hell over 47,000 of them 
 escaped. Unh unh. United We Stand eh. What a freak'n crock. 
 Just more of their bullshit.

                               *


 I recently had occasion to listen to Classic KING-FM for a few 
 weeks. As you likely know, I consider it argueably the most boring 
 and mediocre classical music station in the entire country. The 
 playlist sounds like something Ed McMahon and Dick Clark did up. 
 It really sucks. 

 Distracted as I was by that sad fact, I had failed to notice that 
 it seems to have yet another distinction: it is possibly one of 
 the last virtually all-male radio stations in the country. Aside 
 from weekends when they let the Babes handle the mic to sooth any 
 Kiddies who are listening in, it seems otherwise to be all guys. 
 The kind of guys who would welcome the visiting Norweigan ambassador 
 with a stirring medly of tunes by the famous Norweigan composer: 
 Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart. Doh! Why boor the poor bastard with more 
 Greig. He's likely already had a bellyful of that lutefisk. He 
 seemed to get a chuckle out of our clueless hillbillies gesture.

 Apparently Classic KING thinks classical music is a little too 
 complex for the simple brains of women to handle. If so, they 
 ought to take a closer look at the liner notes on that music - 
 a lot of that stuff is made by Babes. If I can't have Glenn Gould 
 doing Bach, I'll happily take Rosey Tureck any day. And just how 
 in the heck, in this day and age, do they get away with such blatant 
 sexism? Perhaps by being charter members of the Hooterville Yacht 
 Club. Clout like that would likely buy them immunity from the normal 
 rules we lesser fish are forced to endure and would ensure that the 
 state Dept. of Labor would never be a problem. Surely King County 
 Inferior Court could also be counted on to put The Fix in on any 
 embarassing lawsuits or legal challenges. That's their specialty.

 The process would be aided by the fact that the HYC Ladies Auxillary 
 is composed completely of Good Girls who know their place and know 
 enough to keep their traps shut. No pushy Barbara Jordans or unruly 
 Anne Richards in that crowd. Senators Murray and Cantwell, both
 charter members of the Ladies Auxillary, probably have to be physically 
 restrained from handling the coffee service in the Senate chamber in 
 The Other Washington. But I think the Sergant At Arms may be getting 
 a little tired of reminding them to take off their aprons before 
 entering the chamber. Makes them look like the Betty Crocker twins.

 Classic KING, like Mars, needs women.

.....................................................................
 
  Keep the juices going by jangling around gently as you move.

                       - Satchel Paige -
                The Greatest Pitcher of All Time

.....................................................................

                            THE AVE

 The city announced this week that they're going to spruce up "The
 Ave" - the main drag through the U District. This would be good
 news to many of the merchants who operate joints there except that
 a lot of them have already left and therefore weren't around to 
 hear the announcement. 

 The U District and it's Ave have gone through many incarnations
 over the years. The near-by campus has always sort of set the
 tone and made it a College Town within a city. Its young, highly
 transient and somewhat international population constantly on
 the move, heading somewhere else. A place of apartments, dorms, 
 frat houses, sororities and low-rent joints. A place of bookstores, 
 fast-food joints, vegetarian restaurants, theaters, micro-brew 
 bars. A neighborhood with a highly frivolous and playful side 
 to it. Yet one where people still like to sit and discuss the 
 Great Issues of the Day over a coffee or chess game. People 
 don't raise families in this neighborhood - they just live and
 learn here.

 Up until the late 70's rents and property used to be pretty cheap. 
 Then Asians started buying up property. The cost of rents and annual 
 leases rapidly began to skyrocket forcing out many of the home-grown 
 entrepeneurs. All-american Greasy Spoons got replaced by teriyaki
 joints and clubs got replaced by import retail outlets. Shops on The
 Ave were the only ones to survive. Since the real estate was worth
 more than the buildings on it whole blocks to either side of it were 
 demolished and turned into eternal parking lots.  Awaiting the next 
 great land rush. The odd one became an ugly/cheap modern apartment 
 complex or little office building, but very few. Large, impersonal 
 multi-national corporate chains were the only ones who could afford 
 the rent. They began edging in - McDonalds, Burger King, Best Western, 
 etc. GameWorks bought up an old office building on The Ave and 
 renovated it adding a restaurant next door.

 The local Safeway, the only supermarket in the neighborhood, is a
 dumpy, little relic - a lost corner in Safeway's corporate basement.
 Not much more than an over-grown beer store really. Line ups are 
 often super-long and service intermittent. Stuff disappears from 
 the shelves for weeks before they bother to restock it. The deli 
 is about as neurotic as they come. Often they just plain don't 
 feel like serving anyone - so they don't bother. Since they bought 
 in ages ago when property was relatively cheap, they now have no 
 worries about competition. Their competition can't afford to move 
 in next door and give them a run for their money. As a result, 
 prices are high and service low. Don't like them apples? It's a 
 long ways to an alternative.

 The University Bookstore is still there. But it's one of those
 places where you not only have to pay top price, they also expect
 you to kiss their butt to show your appreciation. They got a Major
 Attitude Prolbem. Considering its small size and very limited 
 stock, it's a wonder where they got this problem. A little touch 
 of arrogance left from the Good Old Days before Borders and Barnes 
 & Noble moved into town. Back before that, UWBS was the only show 
 in town bookwise. The little computer/electronics shop they run is 
 a joke. They won't let ordinary people buy any of the software 
 because it's strictly for students/staff/faculty only. You ever 
 try to plead with a clerk to LET you buy something? The computer/
 pda/calculator stuff is all hyper-expensive top-dollar and the 
 selection sucks. Service? What service? Like the bookstore, they 
 couldn't care less. Being a university facility, it's not like 
 they actually HAVE to turn a profit or NEED customers. The 
 taxpayers will cover any losses. They get paid regardless. Besides, 
 it's quieter without annoying customers constantly bugging them 
 with questions and wanting to buy stuff. 

 Thanks to President Yellowbelly's recession, many merchants have
 Bought The Farm in the past year creating numerous vacancies. The
 Ave's beginning to look deserted as it fills with more and more
 empty store-space. Big Boyz like McDonalds, Burger King and Game
 Works split. Many smaller fish, struggling to make the rent as it
 was, got blasted out. Even the Cops hardly come around with their 
 Muggermobile RV any more to hassle the Ave Rats. The Ave Rats are 
 still there though, hassle'n citizens just as they always have. 
 If you're nice to them maybe they'll share the sidewalk with you. 
 Don't get sassy with them or the knives will come out. And the 
 same Old Gang is just hang'n in front of the 7-11 look'n for some 
 action, running mind-candy to the nearby frat/sorority kiddies. 
 Our own little Demilitarized Zone in the War on Drugs. The Cops 
 never touched them. 

 In effect, the Asians froze the district. Because of the high cost,
 few new things were built and, while the adjoining campus grew like
 Topsy, the business district servicing it actually shrunk. There 
 is little to draw people here. The Ave has become a pretty boring
 place. Can't get a fast burger, nowhere to shake your Boo-Tay, no 
 place to even buy any fried chicken and nothing but up-scale proto-
 Yuppie micro-brew joints with the occasional sports bar to wet your 
 whistle in. And what with thousands of university students plus 
 university staff plus the occasional football game, all avaialble 
 parking is taken 7/24/365. Everyday I watch people go round and 
 round and round for half an hour waiting for a spot to open up. 
 The City is about to take away yet more of it by eliminating the 
 curbside parking on The Ave itself. Doh! That'll really perk up 
 business eh. They won't give us decent public transit, but they
 won't give us parking space either. Go figger.

 I do most of my shopping up on 65th and Roosevelt these days.
 Lot more variety, choice, and better prices. Most of the books
 I buy are either out of print or specialty items that have to
 be ordered. I learned long ago not to rely on Hooterville's
 bookstores. They're strictly for small-town chumps. And best of
 all - there are actually places to park. 

......................................................................

 Keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see the shadow.

                     - Helen Keller -

......................................................................

                   OL YELLER GOES TO WAR 

 Every fairy-tale has a happy ending and so it is with out most
 recent national Fairy-Tale: "Miss America Does the Taliban-ditos"
 The story begins when sweet, innocent, loveable and slightly 
 neurotic America gets tragically Sucker Punched by Evil Muslim 
 religious nuts just out of the blue. No warning at all. Not so
 much as a "Allah-u-ackbar!". After a few weeks of hysterical 
 screaming and other rather undignified behavior, she bravely 
 pulled herself together, dusted herself off, straightened her 
 bonnet, spit on her hands and set about looking for some varmint
 to kick ass on. Tiny, defenceless, impoverished Afghanistan 
 looked like a safe bet. And now, those nasty Taliban-ditos have 
 been banished to political obscurity while the Demonic Al-Qaida 
 is no more. Amen Brother! A poignent tale of betrayal, American 
 True Grit and Cheap Revenge worthy of a comic book. 

 And that is as close we'll get to The Official Story. Even
 five months afterwards, there has been no investigation of 
 the peculiar events surrounding 9/11/2001 - not by President 
 Yellowbelly, not by either house of Congress nor by any level 
 of our judiciary. The Crime of the Century and not so much as 
 a Grand Jury looking into it. By comparison, there are at
 least 5 investigations presently going on into the recent 
 collapse of the huge energy company Enron. At this late stage 
 of the game, one would be pretty much a waste of time and money. 
 Given our $60 Billion Buck investment in our knee-jerk reaction 
 and the cold trail, there would be little incentive to do 
 anything but toe the Official Party Line to justify our 
 reaction after the fact. Why bother? Let History figure 
 it out on its own.

 The only thing we know absolutely for certain is: 3 aircraft 
 crashed into the two towers of the WTC and into the Pentagon, 
 respectively, killing an inderminate number of unsuspecting, 
 innocent and very ordinary people. That's it. It's down on 
 tape, the dead bodies and piles of rubble are an established, 
 indisputable physical fact even if the numbers are questionable.

 And, if Uncle Sammy has anything to say about it, that's all 
 we ever will know for sure about the peculiar events surrounding
 9/11/2001. All he's fed us is USDA Grade-A FUD (fear, uncertainty 
 and doubt). A mass of contradictions, outright lies and other 
 forms of obfuscation designed to keep us in a perpetual state of 
 confusion and dread. We've become a nation of mushrooms - kept
 in the dark and fed bullshit. And anyone who dares question or 
 doubt any of it is a liar/crackpot/traitor. Not only are we denied 
 the facts, our Attorney General would like us to know that it's 
 possibly illegal, certainly immoral and plainly unpatriotic for 
 us to even imagine we're entitled to them. Our News Nazis are 
 more than willing to enforce that notion. They allow no other 
 opinion and anything Sammy says is unquestioned Gospel Truth 
 far as they're concerned.

 There's a strange sort of ambiguity out amongst the Hoy-Poloy.
 Right from the start there's been an odd reluctance and lack of 
 enthusiasm for President Yellowbelly's Holy Christian Crusade 
 against the Muslims in Afghanistan. It's almost an embarassment. 
 People are quietly refusing to play along. Few are flying flags 
 from their homes or cars. Few ever did. Most of those who were 
 flying them have now removed them. Bring up 9/11 in conversation 
 and people immediately want to change the subject. They don't 
 want to talk about it. 
 
 It's a dangerous topic to mention to strangers. Unless you come
 on like a super-patriot may have a couple FBI agents knocking on 
 your door the next day like that guy in Frisco who got into a gym 
 argument. There is a heavy risk that no matter what you say will 
 seriously offend and piss-off whoever you say it to. It's better 
 to just avoid the topic completely. If some patriot pushes too 
 hard, just feed him whatever he wants to hear so you can get the 
 idiot outta your face. If a critic pushes too hard, just shrug 
 your shoulders and tell him you don't know anything about what 
 he's talking about. It's not like there's anything you can do 
 about it. None of the people calling the shots gives much of a 
 damn what any of us think or feel. We don't count anymore.

 The 'patriotism' we see from our News Nazis and the flags
 hanging in stores isn't patriotism at all. It's cowardice.
 It's the result of people calling in and saying, "Hey! How
 come you unpatriotic bastards haven't got any flags flying?"
 They're caving in to President Yellowbelly's intimidation
 and the bullying and threats of a handful of hateful little
 bigots. They fly our flag out of fear, not pride. How can 
 I tell? Because it wasn't there last year or the year before
 or the year before that. And none of them are putting up
 flag-poles to make it a permanent thing. It's just until the
 temperature cools down a bit - part-time patriots.

 Mine was. My flag always flies. Mine isn't a flag of war or
 peace. Neither is it a flag of pride. Mine is a flag of hope.
 A symbol of that eternal human hope for Freedom, Liberty
 and Equality. That is precisely what the people who designed
 it intended for it to represent. That was the mandate they
 handed us. The one we've rarely been good for. The one we're 
 presently failing.

 For the moment, no one has the guts to tell the bullies and 
 bigots to go screw themselves. But that time will come. Sooner 
 or later, they always get cocky and push it just a little too
 far and cross that magic line. Or just boor the hell outta
 everybody until we get tired of hearing their baloney. Then, 
 after they get publically spanked, they'll temporarily slink 
 back into their dark and dirty holes until the next time. 
 Hopefully we'll still have a Constitution and Bill of Rights 
 left after this latest round.

 We've all been here before. 

 And as for the fairy tale...it's bullshit of course. This
 thing isn't over. It's only begun. And it's much, much 
 bigger than Osama and Mullah Omar. Far bigger than President
 Yellowbelly. People all over the world have begun to rage
 against our Evil machine. The great wheel has begun to turn 
 and our Divine Protection has been revoked. We're on our own 
 now. We don't need God any more and God never did need us.
 Though He had high hopes for us once upon a time. 

......................................................................

               Jesus done left Chicago 
               and he's bound for New Orleans
               Well now Jesus just left Chicago
               and he's bound for New Orleans
               Yeah, Yeah
               Work'n from one end to the other
               and all points in between.

               Took a jump through Mississippi,
               well, muddy water turned to wine.
               Took a jump through Mississippi,
               Muddy water turned to wine.
               Yeah, Yeah.
               Then out to California 
               through the forests and pines.

               Ah. Take me with you Jesus!

               You might not see him in person
               but he'll see you just the same.
               You might not see him in person
               but he'll see you just the same.
               Yeah. Yeah.

               You don't have to worry
               cuz take'n care of business is his name.

                         - ZZ Top -

 ......................................................................

                        MONDO VATICANO

 What a peculiar thing to do. This week the Vatican notified all
 priests that they are not required to abide by their bishops
 if instructed to use altar-girls instead of altar-boys. Imagine
 that - big grown men afraid of little girls. What a sad and
 embarassing spectacle the Pope and Curia are making of themselves.

			+	+	+

 Just how important is the Papacy and Curia to the well-being 
 of the Catholic Church? This is a forbidden question. The 
 Vatican considers it statutory heresy to even think about it. 
 But it is clearly a worthwhile and fundamental question to ask, 
 however nervous it may make Roma's ecclesiastic paper-shufflers 
 and bean-counters.

 Our predecessors, the Hebrews, have been around a lot longer 
 than we have. They don't have a Pope. They don't even have 
 priests. They used to have the equivalent of both back in the 
 days of the Jerusalem temples. But with the destruction of the 
 second temple 2,000 years ago and the dispersal of the Jews into 
 the Diaspora, also came the destruction of the old hierarchy. 
 Even in modern Israel, it has not been allowed to reassume its 
 old authority. They got told to take a hike when they tried.
 It takes more than 2,000 years to fade memories like that.

 Theirs was the sort of endgame under which many a culture and
 people have disappeared. With the sort of hostility they
 faced in Christian Europe and Muslim North Africa over the
 millenia, subject as they were to nearly continuous pograms, 
 mass banishments, forced conversions and what not, they should 
 have been wiped from the face of the earth. If not through 
 extinction, then through assimilation. 

 Instead, they not only survived, they spiritually flourished. 
 Teachers (rabbis) replaced priests. National communities and 
 the wisdom of the synagogues replaced the temple hierarchy. 
 As diverse as these groups were, they maintained a consistent 
 core that withstood assaults from without and contained 
 extravagances from within. Anarchy had replaced centralized 
 authority and provided a kind of security in that there no 
 longer was a center to destroy. Common Jews of the synogogues, 
 guided by their traditions and anchored by the Torah at the
 heart of their beliefs, defined Judaism, not the bureaucrats 
 nor even the rabbis.

 The Sephardic community of Spain produced both mystical and 
 rationalist teachers of legendary fame until Catholic Queen 
 Isabella dispersed all but the Conversos (those forcibly-
 converted to Christianity) from her realm. The ancient Jewish 
 community in Italy, at one time second-only to Jerusalem even 
 in the days of the temples, took on a new cultural and religious
 prominence whose influence spread to the emerging Ashkenazic
 community in Germany. Likewise for the old Eastern European 
 synagogues. The ancient centers in Egypt and Palestine became 
 nourishing and inspiring anchors for much of the Diaspora. 
 Only the Greek centers embraced Christianity and disappeared. 
 Not even retaining significant influence within the Christian
 Church they spawned.

 Spiritual adventurers of every stripe travelled between each 
 center learning and teaching as they went. Often they mixed with 
 Christian and Muslim explorers absorbing and sharing insights. 
 Teachers, both mystical and rational, of remarkable spiritual 
 brillance and imagination emerged time after time: Rambam, 
 Rashi, Abraham Abulafia, Moses de Leon, Isaac Luria, the Ba'al 
 Shem Tov, etc. etc. And they had the freedom and erudition to
 leave words of profound spiritual insight the likes of which 
 can't be found in Christianity: The Zohar, Tanya, Sefer ha-Bahir, 
 Sefer ha-Ot, etc. etc.

 Judaism remained vibrant and alive. Not because of the rabbis, 
 but because of the common Jews who populated the synagogues. 
 They ultimately determined what was and was not Jewish. And 
 their need, unlike the old hierarchy, was not for power and
 authority but for meaning. They demanded teachings that were 
 relevant to their lives - a Judaism that they could live in 
 their daily lives. One robust enough to maintain their identity
 as a people through the many assaults from outside. But, above
 all, one that would enable them to approach HaShem - to know 
 and feel His presence personally.

 Would Catholicism evaporate if the Pope and Curia disappeared?
 Of course not. Our roots may not run as deeply as those of the
 Jews, but our traditions have a profundity, depth and diversity
 that can stand on its own. Through most of its history, the 
 Papacy and Curia have existed primarily as political entities.
 Their focus was not on Christ but on the world and its affairs.
 The significant spirtual figures and ideas that emerged, came
 not from Rome, but from individuals and small communities -
 the Catholic Family. Rome was more likely to stifle such 
 inspiration than encourage it. Many saints died as heretics on
 Roma's burning stakes. They were considered a threat to its
 temporal power and authority. They became martyrs to the 
 Vatican's worldly greed and lust for power; it's narrowed-
 minded ignorance, bigotry and intolerance.

 Roma shares the corruption, perversion and decadence that was
 so characteric of the Jerusalem temples. It was rightfully 
 stripped of the temporal power it so shamefully abused. It is 
 now being stripped of even its influence in the world. Its 
 counsel is routinely ignored by Catholics the world over as 
 out-of-touch and irrelevant. A fact that it arrogantly and
 blindly refuses to recognize. The Vatican now lives in a little 
 fantasy make-believe bubble world sustained by a World Media 
 that considers it 'light entertainment' - an arcane, medieval 
 throw-back, an amusing anachronism in this modern, high-tech 
 world. Whether their bubble pops or not hardly matters any 
 longer. It clearly is floating away of its own volition as 
 the Catholic Family increasingly, quietly regains its rightful 
 original preminance. 

 Our greatest thinkers are found not in Catholic institutions, 
 but in secular and Protestant institutions beyond Roma's 
 influence. The most significant liturgical experimentation is 
 occuring quietly in parishes at the initative of the laity, 
 not the backrooms of the Curia. The most influencial work of 
 integrating Catholic morals into public life is also at the 
 initative of the laity and occuring in groups like the Society
 of St. Egidio without significant help or support from the
 Curia. The entire push for an eccumenical reuniting of God's
 People originated with the laity and continues to manifest
 itself most meaningfully at that level. Roma has lost even the 
 ability to obstruct progress. It is floating away slowly but 
 surely. Detached from the very people it professes to lead.
 Eternally living in yesterday.

--------------------------------------------------
 The above is copyright material. You want to use it,
 ask. You want to make money off it, gimme some first.
 I'll let you know if it's enough. You want to steal it,
 I'll sic my lawyer Yoshi 'The Proctologist' Rasmussen
 on you baby. He'll teriyaki your sorry butt and turn
 it into Lutefisk.
~--------------------------------------------------
 MAIL:    tofoggymoment@yahoo.com
 ARCHIVE: http://www.geocities.com/tofoggymoment
--------------------------------------------------